04 | the soundless night
I wrapped the fuzzy blanket tighter around myself and laid in bed. I was waiting for him to leave before doing something productive. I did not know what he wanted me to do now.
The bathroom door crept open and my heart thudded in fear. He had a towel wrapped around his waist, leaving him almost bare and I felt myself look away, fearing his closeness so soon. Without sparing me a glance, he walked inside his walk-in closet.
I strained my ears to hear him, but could not. He was as slick as a panther, undetected and aware of even the slightest shift. I pulled the duvet closer to my body, pushing myself up with my elbows.
I could nity help but glance at him when he stepped out. A dark suit hugged his body neatly as he holstered guns behind him. I knew there were more though. A mob member, especially the Don of the Giordano Family, would not go out without protection. I would not be surprised had he worn a bulletproof vest under his black shirt.
"I won't be here till late. Do not leave the house," he ordered, looking at me through the mirror.
I meekly nodded, surprised that he talked to me. Men did not tell their women about their whereabouts. Well, he did not exactly tell me but he gave me something. It was also something Father had never done.
He didn not use gel but his hair was slicked back and away from his face in an elegant manner. I could not deny that he was attractive. I knew he worked out with his high cheekbones and sharp jawline. A bitter taste left my mouth when I realized that he probably had a mistress somewhere. Dons were respected if they had a lot of women and were able to keep them without a fuss, especially his wife—me.
He fiddled with his gold watch before turning around and leaving. His tall stature was out the door before I could even blink. A sigh of relief left my lips. He had not taken my innocence now but he sure was going to next time and I could not help but feel like it was going to be a lot worse since he was deprived of me this time. I did not know him enough to know what to expect.
My phone rang at the side. I was surprised that the Don had not taken it from me when he found it in my secret pocket. He had just placed it on the bedside table and continued his admiration. Father did not allow Mother a phone. He lacked trust for that. Father was even unwilling to lend me one but I had to go to university. He did not want me asking someone else and ruining his reputation as a decent businessman when he was far from that. It was too risky.
I did not pick up the call, hoping whoever it was would leave me alone. I was in no mood to talk to anyone and my head felt heavy but the person did not budge. They called again. Grabbing the small black device I saw Sophia's name pop up. I did not forget about her. I was just avoiding her. She did not know my address anyways and I was hoping that she would soon forget about me. It had been days since I last talked with her. I was not allowed to.
But I could not bring myself to block her. She was the only 'normal' thing in my life. The only person who cared enough to keep tabs on me even after school was finished. But, despite all that and how much I wanted her in my life, she needed to leave. I did not want her death in my hands. If the Don found out then he would kill her.
I disconnected the call before getting up, completely forgetting that I was naked until I felt a cool breeze zap my bare skin. Nudity always bothered me, even when alone. It always made me feel like I was being watched. It made me feel paranoid. I quickly put on my panties and scampered into the walk-in closet with my hands covering my breasts.
The closet was big and chilly. New suits were hung on the right with more formal necessities while casual clothes hung at the front. The left side was untouched however and I realized it was for me. The gesture warmed my heart because it was another odd thing. Back home Mother had her clothes placed in a cramped space becuase Father was obsessed with getting new suits each day. Some he had not even wore once.
My bags were not here so I grabbed a shirt from the wall and threw it over my head temporarily. I was not going to prance around naked and hopefully, he would not mind me borrowing his clothes. I did not have a choice anyways. He left me space but not my clothes. Maybe I could change before he comes home. But that was impossible unless I wore my wedding dress again which I was not going to. It was too tight and itchy. It was not even my favourite but rather just the most expensive one.
Walking out of the closet, I head to the bathroom to take a shower and get rid of his touch. I felt dirty and used. He was my husband, but yet still a stranger. I was not comfortable and I could not tell him to stop either. I did not have the right or courage to do so. That was what I was always told.
The bathroom was not any less rich. It was huge and comfortable. With two sinks closer to the door and a bathtub and shower placed separately, it was a dream. I liked the bathroom best. Maybe, sometime when he was not home, I could chill in here and play my favourite music and eat. Maybe I could even act like a queen around here.
I caught my reflection in the mirror making me pause in horror. The marks were anything but pretty. They looked like bruises and similar to the ones after Mother was tormented. I could not stand it any longer. I did not pause to see myself after I took my clothes off. I just knew I would not like it. Hickies were not pretty.
Shutting the glass doors, my hands itched to cool the water but I did not. I wanted his touch burned off me. At least, for now. He may be beautiful, the one who's ring I wore and an honourable mafioso, but he would always still be a devil. My ultimate ruination.