I picked at the loose, fallen thread - the whole expanded - a fast, hard motion, it was ripped away. Poor pants. The chair beside me screeched. He leaned the seat on its back legs for balance. A quill between his teeth as he nibbled it softly, small dents at the tip.
Was the professor saying anything?
“Get your Earmuffs-”
When was the last time I played the piano? There is a small memory. Faint, but there. Sitting in front of the instrument, my dad beside me. Notes being played, filling the air with a variety of sounds. What else was there? Slowly, the opacity of the image was pale and indistinct.
I shifted in my seat, close enough to Ashton, my words only audible to him. “Want to leave?”
He swallowed visibly, “But we’re in the middle of a lesson-”
Giving him a look of despair, I let my body slump back into the seat, in hopes that he would feel- bad. He eyed the Professor holding the mandrake before closing his eyes and sighing. “Where to?”
Since classes were ongoing, the halls were empty. Ashton was gripping my hand tight in his as we walked. It isn’t like we have to hide from anyone, friends can hold hands. Besides, this shouldn’t even be an issue. People aren’t even supposed to care, they should all mind their business. Making me question how they view me, fucking bastards.
Ashton pushed open the bathroom door and softly tugged my arm to follow. He had a cheeky smile on his face as he walked me into the room.
“Did I ever tell you that you look lovely with your hair like that-” he waved his finger in the air, pointing towards the chaotic bundle of braids connected into a bun at the lower part of my head, “-you should do it more often,” he smiled.
Leaning my weight onto the side of the sink I crossed my arms above my chest. I felt my cheeks turn hot red, “You tell me every day.”
The early morning light was burning through the massive window to the left side of the room, making the air feel warm on my skin even though the room was cold. The sun perfectly lightened Ashtons features, his honey light brown hair was set complexed above his forehead. The softness of his skin was already telling.
As his tall thin body stood in front of me, the shadow reflected made looking at his face easier. A tiny smile fighting its way not to be seen. Slowly, almost cautiously, his left hand moved closer to mine beside the sink. He started drawing tiny gentle patterns on the outer part of my hand. His touch felt so gentle- so different than-
His touches felt calm. Trusting. I wasn’t sure if he caught the way my body tensed, if he did, he might’ve just thought it was the coldness from the room. But it wasn’t the cold from the room- it was the cold memory- the cruel cold behind his eyes.
But Ashton isn’t anything similar to Flint.
My mind didn’t allow me to enjoy the warmth of his caresses or the softness of his hands against my cheek.
Ashton is nothing even akin to him- I know that.
My hand reached out to grip his robe. I balled the fabric up into my fist, pressing his lips onto mine.
His lips were cold from the weather. Tracing my tongue above his teeth, his hand on my mine tightened. By feeling his lips above mine, I was assured he was nothing like him. Even though I’m questioning why I would need an assertation. After a few seconds, he pulled away, his eyes dark with need. His head dipped down onto my exposed neck. His lips met with my skin, and his words were as gentle as his touch, “You” - “look” - “Beautiful” Inbetween each word he would suck on my skin gently.
He swirled his tongue over my clavicle, adrenaline noticeable with the way his teeth would nib softly. He traced a slow path down my side with his hands, the sensation of his arms behind my back was as soft as a feather. My hands wrapped around his neck, interlocking at my wrists behind his head.
He gripped my waist on each side and in one sharp movement I was sitting above the sink’s edge, both legs wrapped around his hips.
“Mm-” My hands ran franticly through his soft hair. A sizzling sensation passed through my body with the way his ragged breaths entered my mouth, almost making me forget about his hands playing with the buttons of my shirt.
His movements felt rushed. Almost as if someone might walk in at any moment.
My hands dropped from his hair, reclining my body as I placed them on my sides above the sink’s edge. Breath.
As much as I was trying to prevent it, a ragged uneven breath escaped my mouth. Separating our lips, he leaned beside my ear, “You ok?” His breath against my cheek was hot.
If he stopped then I wouldn’t be able to forget, idiotic of me, but true. I wouldn’t be able to forget. This is where I question where that sensibility trait came from. Fuck it. I slid my hands around his open neck, two top buttons being undone, his soft skin felt like cotton under my hands, the warmth radiating through my system.
His fingers seemed to have a slight shiver as he started to pluck the first button. Managing to get the last button, the shirt struggled to fall from my shoulders for a second before my chest was completely exposed. The cold air hitting my skin intensely. Clearly, the black laced bra got Ashton’s attention. His eyes lingered over the fabric for seconds before tangling his hands in my hair and interlocking his lips with mine.
I was going to forget. He had to keep going. So, I nodded.
His hands traced my jaw, slowly going down onto my neck and passing his fingers like a feather above my collarbone. His hand snaked it’s way to my back, after a few tugs of trying, he unclasped my bra. Letting it fall down my arms onto the floor.
His right hand came up to palm one of my breasts. His movements were soft and slow. The intensity of his actions made my back arch into his hand. Aching for more. I felt my nipples peak as his fingers came in contact. He pinched it softly before letting go and softly rubbing it again, loosening the pain. He groaned in the back of his throat.
Ashton lowered his head and captured my breast with his lips. Biting back a moan, I dug my nails onto his shoulder. “Fuck-” I rasped out. He sucked onto my skin, his teeth denting my flesh softly. His other hand went to palm my opposite breast.
His tongue was swirling over my skin, while his hand was massaging my other breast.
It felt like electricity burning up through my body.
My head was thrown back, and I felt my toes curl. His movements became sloppier. Frantic. His rosy mouth started a path, going lower to my abdomen. He kissed my spectrum, pressure building up within.
Ashtons hot breath collided with my stomach, he was nuzzling my skin lightly. A moan erupted from his mouth. Nothing he did seemed rough. Everything was gentle. His hands slid from my breasts as he traced the waistline of my skirt. His fingers were gently tucking themselves between the fabric and my skin. I felt a similar feeling. My breathing disorients, and my fingers about to spasm.
“Ash-” my throat tightened, “No- I don’t think-”
He slowly raised his face away from my stomach as he stared intently at me. Trying to read my expressions. Hopefully, I fooled him with a smile.
“No- It’s-” he looked around, “Don’t worry,”
He reached down onto the floor and picked up the black laced bra handing it swiftly towards me. While getting dressed again I looked around for my shirt. Getting off the sink, the door burst open.
“Oh- this is interesting,” Daphne quirked her head to the side, holding the door open.
My hand reached out to get my shirt which Ashton was holding. Suddenly feeling completely exposed. The warmth of his touch was gone and it was oh so fast that the cold room grew smaller. I quickly covered myself with the shirt before looking over at Ashton, his face was flushed and his hair was messily placed above his brows.
Ashton scratched the back of his neck, uncomfortable. Turning to look back at Daphne, the door was closing. She was gone. Her low laughter filling the halls.
Pansy stayed looking at herself in the mirror. Her hand passed through her hair creating ripples falling down her back, “Well this is a look,” she laughed before turning to face me, “Are you ready?”
Adjusting the last button on my pants, I reached for my necklace above the drawer. “Yes, but can you help me with this?” I waved the necklace in the air.
Quickly, Pansy was able to hook both wires together behind my neck. She opened the door signaling with one hand to walk out, “Let’s go” she smirked.
We appeared in front of the Three Broomsticks, the fresh air made my lungs expand as an automatic calmness washed over my body. Walking inside, Pansy was already ahead of me. She strolled over to a table with one other. Draco. The place was filled with conversations overlapping conversations.
“Took so long, made me wait here with this impatient one.” Draco took a sip of his whiskey.
I took a seat beside Pansy, we were across from Draco. Pansy placed one arm around my shoulder before turning to me with a fake pout, “He missed us,”
I laughed before playing along, “Our presence is necessary for you,”
He rolled his tongue, his gaze shifting from Pansy to me. He looked me over like he was analyzing a difference. “Seems so,” He took a sip of his drink, “Your presence is like watching a stupid foolish show, the one everyone skips by.” A smirk was visible through his glass cup.
Pansy scoffed, “Your favorite show.”
Seconds of silence where the only thing filling the air. “Where’s Blaise?” I questioned.
“I’ll hope he is getting drinks,” Pansy said.
My gaze ran through the entire room, looking for him. He must have been in the bathroom since he wasn’t anywhere I could spot.
Draco’s glass clinked against the table as he set his drink down.
His cologne was intense. Fuck it smelled good.
Curiosity always got the best of me. In every single situation. My eyes trailed to look at Draco. His eyes were locked on something else, something near the door. He looked intrigued. Following his gaze, he was eyeing someone. A group of girls walking into the pub, or was it that certain blond-haired one? Daphne. It can’t be just I that realizes she goes everywhere Malfoy goes. It’s like she’s his puppet. His play toy.
I heard Draco laugh lowly under his breath. I snapped my head around. His stare was no longer placed anywhere else, he was eyeing me from above his glass rim with a smirk, slowly swallowing his drink. His eyes were boring into me from across the table, but his gaze gave nothing away. Only the cold sight that would make you think he planned that stimulation.
Fucking bastard. He did that on purpose.
Pansy snapped at Draco, “I need a favor,” she fake pouted.
He sighed shifting to look at her instead, “I’m sure Zabini would love to help.”
“Yeah, where is he?” I questioned.
Draco didn’t spare me a glance, Instead Pansy pointed a finger over to the bar. Blaise was talking to some random stranger. They were laughing, he seemed to have completely forgotten we were here. The woman pulled something out from her pocket before sneakily passing it over to Blaise’s waiting hand.
Pansy sat up straight, “You studied for Mondays’ test but I haven’t so-”
“Way to ruin the mood, Parkinson.” Draco scoffed.
Blaise appeared, he took his seat next to Draco. Giving me and Pansy a smile before showing us a clear bag containing small white pills. “What a nice lady,” he smiled gingerly.
“How many times are you going to seduce women in order to get drugs?” I laughed while reaching out to take the pill Blaise was offering.
He shrugged, “As many times needed.”
Everyone privately swallowed the pill, trying to make their movements unobvious. Everything started to swim around me. The feeling was surreal, watching every other moving atom in the room felt like observing a movie. Colors were more vibrant, items seemed to be popping out of their frame.
They seemed to be enjoying it as much as I did. Draco was taking more shots out of his glass. Blaise was drinking fire whiskey out of the bottle, after two sips he would pass it over to Pansy. She would grip the bottle’s neck and take a long sip before handing it my way. Happily, I took a sip. The liquid burned the back of my throat. All my sensations were afar now.
Blaise reached into his pocket, pulling out the bag once again. Draco’s eyebrows rose as he inspected Blaise. Pansy had her head thrown back, letting the burn run in her system.
Blaise turned to look at Draco then back at the clear bag, “Wasn’t it your idea to get wasted?”
Draco rolled his eyes and scoffed.
“Give me one more,” Pansy laughed.
Usually Pansy would be able to control herself in these situations. She would do as much as she wanted but she would never get fully wasted. But ever since Blaise has tagged along with the drinking, she has found it in her favor that this way may be the only way to feel free. This was letting her let go of everything for once. And for her part, she would laugh at everything. Even if it is not even remotely funny, and Blaise will always join her.
Blaise laughed along, handing pansy another white pill. I took the last sip from the fire whiskey bottle in my hand. Quirking my head to the side I heard Draco huff in frustration.
“Nyla,” Blaise smiled innocently, “Would you please order one more bottle.”
This is definitely not going to turn our right. There hasn’t been one time when Blaise being drunk hasn’t gotten us in trouble. He can start to ramble about theories and un-relatable information. He has asked us if we are from a foreign country before, along with him questioning if he will ever get in someone’s pants once he is ninety.
I rolled my eyes while I stood up and made my way to the bar.
Leaning one elbow onto the table, I waved a hand in the air in order to get a bartender’s attention. They all seemed busy preparing drinks for others. From the seat beside me, a man whistled. I turned to face them, he looked my body up and down. My weight shifted, leaning further away from them. Isn’t that a natural instinct?
Why can’t people mind their own business and stop being bloody creeps? Ordering a drink- no ordering anything in general- is supposed to be quick and easy, but certain people like him make it difficult.
“Fuck off.” I spat, my voice wavered.
He clicked his tongue, “Aggressive one aren’t you?” The man pushed his chair a few inches back from the table, slowly standing up. He already had more height than me.
A panic rose in the pit of my stomach. I weighed my options. I could either repeat myself, but that never works out, or I could- my fingers fidgeted with a pen someone must have left above the table-
“People are getting impatient Moore.” Draco was leaning over the bar, holding himself up with his forearm above the table. His jaw was clenched with his eyes were locked onto the guy in front of me, inspecting him. He had a sneer to his tone, cold.
“Let me pay for your drink-” The man’s arm shot out to place a hand on mine. The roughness of his fingers felt like sandpaper against my skin.
Instantly I pulled my arm away. Stumbling a few steps back, Dracos’s presence behind me felt too close now. His body felt board behind mine. Draco dropped his head and laughed shortly -anyone could tell his laugh was based on anger- before straightening his shoulders and signaling a finger towards a worker, “One firewhiskey,”
Draco looked at me for a split second before taking the bottle from the bartender. He popped it open and took a sip while eyeing the man in front of me intently from the rim of the bottle. “Trouble hearing? Here, let me repeat it for you. Fuck off." His face was stone, and his voice was cold.
The man retrieved his hand from mine and quietly sat back down. His eyes shifted over my body once more before turning to his drink on the table.
The bartender was patiently waiting on the other side of the bar, Draco signaled a finger towards the guy, “This gentleman will pay” With another sip, he walked away holding the bottle by the neck. I followed and sat back down by Pansy.
“Some random dude gave us a free bottle” Pansy laughed pointing over to a guy at an opposite table while taking a sip from the drink in her hand.
“You both took forever,” Blaise sang the last word. “So we took it upon ourselves to drink this one instead.” He signaled to the bottle Pansy was holding firmly.
Draco placed the bottle he was holding above the table before running a hand through his hair. I laid my head against Pansy’s shoulder. She seemed extremely doused off. Blaise seemed to think his entire world was spinning.
“Holy shit do you guys remember that guy- the guy-” Blaise stopped to think for a second before signaling to Pansy, “the one with the rich dad,”
Pansy quirked an eyebrow up before laughing shortly, “Montague!”
“Yeah him-” Blaise swallowed another sip of fire whiskey, “-He must have cheated on the tests for Profesor Binns right? No way he got a higher score than Malfoy.”
Draco looked over at Blaise, his face scrunch in thought for a second, he seemed to be processing who Montague was.
“He claims to be a know it all.” Draco scoffed.
Pansy laughed, dropping her head, “He’s rich and smart, thoughts Nyla?”
“He’s a bloody twat, won’t leave you alone after giving him one ounce of attention.”
“His dad was on the newspaper this morning, apparently he had new thoughts on improving the ministry with some sort of-” Pansy choked a laugh, “-gadget" It took her about 10 seconds to compose herself in order to keep speaking, “-getting paid hundreds for it.”
“Pathetic. Is all he can shove in your faces, his father’s accomplishments?”
“Malfoy, we appreciate you as a friend, don’t you worry.” Blaise joked.
“Didn’t his father donate some amount of money to that muggle orphanage last spring?” I questioned.
“You know, it sucks he can’t play any kind of part in his family.” Draco leaned back on his seat.
Blaise laughed, “Here he goes,”
Draco scoffed, “He’s terribly bad at quidditch. Didn’t I beat him- how many?- countless times in matches?”
Blaise passed Pansy the bottle, she took a long sip. They both seem to be getting ready for his rhetoric. Draco spoke again, “My fathers’ friendly gift to our team wouldn’t even be needed with our skills. Expect, with Montague there, they are indeed very useful."
“What about the part about not including your fathers to get what you want?” I raised my brows.
“You think I need my fathers’ accomplishments? Think again yeah?”
Pansy sighed before placing a hand above her stomach, “All hail Malfoy the great.”
Blaise was uncontrollably laughing under his breath. He brought the bottle up to his lips, “If you’re so great then how come you weren’t there to save Nyla from almost getting harrassed by Flint?” He laughed before taking a sip.
My body tensed. I looked over at Pansy, she was slumped against her seat with her eyes closed. Her hand was reaching for the bottle from Blaise.
Blaise passed it her way before wiping his lips, he looked my way and smiled, clearly no realization of the words that left his mouth.
Blaise drinking never goes good.
His world was upside down. He was hearing colors at this point. He had no sense of control over what came out of his mouth. Pansy wasn’t even on this planet to control him. She was daydreaming, dozing off into a fantasy. If she laughed, Blaise laughed along with her. No matter what the topic was, they found everything funny.
Pansy laughed again, “Like I said, Malfoy the great.” She didn’t make sense. No one was thinking straight.
I looked over at Draco. The hand gripping his glass cup was red. His white knuckles contrasted. His eyes were locked into me. His gaze felt like darts being thrown at my body. He seemed tensed as he straightened his shoulders and sat up straight. For once, I wish he would have gotten drunk with the rest of them.
“What did he say?” His voice was like a dagger being drawn up to my throat.
I fiddled with my fingers, feeling them about to spasm uncontrollably again. “I didn’t hear.”
He clenched his jaw and rolled his tongue, “Moore what the fuck did he do-”
I stood up, gripping my coat beside my waist, “Nothing-”
“Where are you going?” Pansy straightened herself from her slumped position.
“Can you come Pans?” I tried to lift her up from her place, “you can come back later if you really want-”
Draco shook Blaise awake. “She’s gonna pass out if she stands up too quickly. Zabini-”
“I’m up!” Blaise rose a hand in the air, “I’m up!”
Pansy laughed, placing a hand above her stomach. Gripping my coat tighter, “Right, well- I’ll see you all tomorrow.”
A few steps out the door, his cold hand reaches for my wrist.
“He said something- that’s why I want to know.” His other hand reached for my opposite wrist, turning me slightly so I could face him.
I tried pulling my arms away, “What did-” That would be a stupid question. “Can you make sure Pansy gets back to our dorm alright?”
He shook his head, “She will. I just need you to explain what happened.”
“Why do you care all of a sudden? Or is this some stupid joke?” I spat.
Draco let go of my wrists, “I don’t care. Why would you ever assume I do?” He clicked his tongue, “I feel bad for whoever has to put with your shit.” His tone made him sound angry, frustrated.
I took a small step back, “So now your mad because I thought you were a decent person who had the possibility of caring for some other than himself?”
He scoffed, “I really could care less about what you would think of me, Moore. I don’t fucking carry anyone on my back, I would never as so much even think about putting someone before me.” He rolled his tongue, “But your right. I don’t care for anyone else but myself.”
I shook my head, “Already knew all of that.” He said the same thing to Blaise and Pansy before, it was his way of making people hate him. Despise him for not caring. Even though he is saying it himself, Pansy was sure he was just trying to push them away. Could he ever care about someone as much as he cares for himself?
His eyes wouldn’t leave mine, he was searching for every reaction, “Why don’t you stop bothering me and ask Flint- about it.” My fingers were spasming under the coat.
I tightened my grip on the fabric, trying to hide the vibrating motions coming from my arm. Draco took notice and he rolled his head back, staring at the night sky for several seconds.
“I didn’t have to ask, he’s a bragger.” he cleared his throat, “apparently you guys fucked in Slughorns classroom.”
I felt myself physically gag at his words. My body wanted to reak itself there and then of the memory.
“You make matters worst every fucking time. I bet you had something to add to his statement. Always seemed to be one who loves gossip,” I swallowed, “is this all going to spread? Is everyone going to thank you for spreading the new ′drama’? ‘Flint had the chance to fuck a nameless Slytherin in a classroom’ Sounds familiar, poor girl.” My throat burned, “Will you also add the details about how she had said no? Continuously, if I might add. But no, his disgusting self would have kept going.”
It took me a few seconds to process everything that came out of my mouth. Regretting every word. Now he knew, would it be best to pretend it was a joke? Definitely, I would be saving both of us from this uncomfortable and useless conversation.
Draco had his hand curled up into a fist by his side. He slickly placed his fist behind his back, of course, ‘He doesn’t care.’
“For fucks sake Moore-” His voice was rasped, “I’m so bland in your eyes- no one has any business in whatever the fuck happened.” There was a sudden rush of relief before his next words made a brick feel like it was dumped in my stomach, “He never mentioned anything about you not agreeing.”
“Well fuck,” I laughed, extremely exaggerated, “Going to have to ask for the real, full, story next time,”
“And what’s ‘would have’ supposed to imply?” His voice was cold. But for once, there was a flicker of concern behind his grey eyes.
“That’s the part where I thank Blaise.” Part of me wanted to laugh at this entire situation, maybe if I did he would understand that I’m over it. But the other half wanted to curl up into a ball and stay there. Never moving. “Thank you for this unnecessary talk.” I turned on my heels and walked.
The dorm was cold. Empty. Pansy will be back soon. It felt like hours staring out the window. Maybe Ashton’s awake. A glance at the clock, two am. My fingers began to spasm once again. Suddenly the room felt empty, too empty. The furniture is there, but I don’t believe it. My mind has faked its way into a white empty room. The same white empty room. What if- no Pansy’s fine. Sitting up straight on my bed, the noise of footsteps filled my ears.
Somone’s shadow was visible through the light coming from under the door. Something was slipped through the door gap. The shadow was gone. Like it was never there.
I waited a few minutes before I stood up and made my way over. Dropping down, I reached for the slip. A note.
I can guess you missed yesterday and today’s information for the project, right? Lucky for you, I’m responsible, shocker.
26 diameters to the east on Thursday. In easy words, 13 degrees. If I remember correctly, you accused me of being incorrect? Today, it started its third quarter phase. If you were to use that miniature brain of yours, multiply the remaining hours of this night, by 0.5. The stupid constellation you choose was situated 6 degrees north to 33 degrees north declination.
I had completely forgotten about the project. This seemed more like a math project than astronomy. Miniature brain? He can go fuck himself. It’s two by the way.