Rogue

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Chapter 24

Levi’s P.O.V

I wake up to gentle, loving kisses being plastered all over my face. I’d grown accustomed to J’s unusual yet unique displays of love. I can’t help but laugh as I open my eyes to find the absolute love of my life looking down at me with pure affection in his eyes.

His arms were wrapped around me with an unforgiving grip which I adored and didn’t hesitate to return. Interweaving my fingers between his trimmed locks, I hover above him staring into those beautiful eyes.

I was practically dripping in his scent which made me smile, he must’ve kept me close last night.

“Good morning mate.” I say with a chuckle, he looked like a puppy with the gleeful face composed of the brightest smile.

He presses a quick kiss to my lips in response, rolling us so that he’s caging me into a world containing only the two of us. When he tries to pull away, I grab him and tug him forward, letting our lips mold like our hearts.

Our lips move in sync, moans, and hums echo through our excited bodies as we rub against one another, getting as close as physically possible. My heart was soaring, beating with a new jolt of electricity and pure contentment as he held me here in his arms.

Hearing him say he loved me had my heart soaring since yesterday, it made the issues surrounding us seem a little less dire.
It made my heart beat just a little faster, the thought of him more exhilarating and the world a whole lot brighter. I couldn’t imagine hearing anything better besides those three words coming from his very own lips.

“I love you so much.” I stretch once we part. He kisses my nose and I know if he could, he’d say it back.

Reluctantly, I loosen my grip as he sits up taking me with him. He stands to his feet, with me wrapped around his waist, and walks us to our bathroom.

Over the past weeks, J had learned to stop running from things such as baths and getting dress, he started to just accept the inevitable.

But it still shocked me to my core when he placed me down gently on the counter and got to work. Putting the stopper into the tub before letting the hot water run, laying out his favorite soap and shampoo next to the tub and finally undressing before getting inside without a complaint.

I walk to him and turn the tap off once it was full before brushing his hair back and looking at him. He looks up to me, big, black eyes filled with wonder and innocence you couldn’t fake. It was raw and real, a look of love and compassion that made the situation we were trying to cope with a lot worse.

I press a kiss to his forehead and undress, escaping to the shower to hide the incoming tears.

Yesterday was horrible.

I came home after that disastrous confrontation with Damon, ecstatic to find comfort in my mate only to find him gone. I looked everywhere denying what I knew was true, he was gone.

Panic flooded me, anxiety and desperation, pain like no other. It was hard to breathe let alone think. But I had to push through it, for J.

I looked everywhere, followed his scent to find it ending in the market. That didn’t make the pain ease any less, only intensified it. I feared for the worst, that someone found him and took him to my father.

I couldn’t stop the tears.

They came quickly and I couldn’t hold them back. Not with the way my mind kept conjuring fates worst than the last for my J, the person who’d quickly and all too suddenly become my everything.

I’d heard that line before, heard the pain people felt when their mate was in a state of discomfort. But I hadn’t felt it until that very moment.

Kneeling in the dirt, clutching to my chest with no knowledge of where he’d went and where he was. If someone was hurting him that very second.

At that moment, I felt it. Felt a knife lodge it’s way into the deepest parts of me and shatter every last piece of my soul.

It was terrifying.

I jump when I feel a hand on my shoulder, spinning quickly, I come face to face with J. His eyebrows meet to form a deep frown I knew I was the cause of. I wipe at my eyes quickly to calm the disturbance in his own.

He cups my checks with both hands, rubbing his thumbs gently as he eyes me carefully. I hate that I’m doing this to him, making him worry with the way I am.

“Don’t worry.” I say resting my palms on his broad chest. My fingers tracing the bumps and ridges from his scars. “I’m fine, really.”

He wasn’t buying it. I knew just by the way he eyed me like a bug under a microscope.

“You scared me yesterday.” I confess, letting my eyes follow my fingertips. “Not knowing where you were or if you were okay, it was one of the worst feelings.”

He stares at me for a long moment, not lifting his eyes from me until I reluctantly raised my own to him. He looked apologetic and sad, two things I wish he wasn’t feeling because it wasn’t his fault.

It wasn’t his fault that he’d made mistakes in the past. It wasn’t his fault that I was taken, that we were separated.

I press myself up on my tip toes, circling his broad shoulders with my arms to rest my head against his. The water crashes down against our skin relentless and I soak it all in; his scent, the warmth of the water and the steam it created.

I soak him in.

----------------

A knock on the door jolts me from my seat at the kitchen island while J keeps eating completely unbothered.

I make my way to the door quickly, swinging it open only when the scent of our visitor filled my nose.

“Hey, I came to see if the big guy was okay.” Hagen says before glancing beside him. “I brought food.”

I smile down at my little brother, warmth, and joy filling my heart entirely as I gleamed at him. He offers me a gentle smile in return, not possibly knowing how him being here,d doing this, meant to me.

“Come in, J will be happy to see you.” I say as I move back so he can come inside. He moved past me gingerly and rushed into the house as soon as the scent of bacon fills his nose.

I follow behind him after closing the door, the second J’s eyes land on Hagen, he’s up in an instant and hugs him immediately.
To say I was shocked at the sight would be an understatement. Genuine joy flooded J’s features as he squeezed a now slightly blue Hagen.

“It’s good to see you too.” Hagen wheezes out while hitting at J’s broad back. “Now let me down Big Guy.”

J eventually obliges and puts Hagen back on his feet, he sways for a moment before shaking his head to steady himself once more. J smiles at him innocently while Hagen glares at him through his mental haze, the gaze disappears the moment J offers him my food. Of course, he’d never offer his own food, I shake my head with a helpless chuckle as I watch the two chow down like children.

I make my way to my mate, hugging him from behind which halts his frantic eating. He peaks back at me before holding my hands with his own. We stare at each other for a moment before he pulls me forward and places me into his lap. His large arm holds me firmly, preventing me from falling as he sat back in his chair with me snuggled into him.

“That was some damn good food.” Hagen comments with a burp before sliding onto the ground dramatically. He lies there for a moment before crawling to a napping Caspar, petting him as he did as a kid, his shoulders lax as he lays there.

“Thanks for coming by.”

“Of course, I could even fall asleep last night not knowing if the big guy found his way home.” He admits with a sad look. “I wanted to come and look for him, but dad was on edge after the meeting so dad, other dad I mean, said it’d be better to stay home.”

“What’d he say?” I ask tentatively.

“Which one?”

“You know which one.” I press and he sighs, avoiding eye contact with me.

“He’s angry.” He admits, reaching up to twirl the loose curls that fell onto his forehead. “He’s not happy to have a rogue on his land, as can be expected. But he’s not stupid Levi, he knows something’s up and meeting J confirmed it.”

“Explain.” I say, jumping slightly at the gentle hand J lays on my back, caressing the skin below my shirt with gentle slow movements. I sink into his touch, thanking him silently for knowing exactly how to calm me down.

“Well ever since you left home, things have been different. Everyone knows about your mate and who he is but dad, it’s like living on thin ice.” He says before smiling as Caspar rolled over unconsciously, opening his body for Hagen to continue to pet. “Peter barely leaves the house, he’s afraid of running into this guy. Josey is being a bigger bitch than usual, she on Damon’s side with this. The Demon at first was a complete dick, but since yesterday he hasn’t left his room, he won’t even let Amelia in. Dad’s also a bit stiff, he’s been acting stranger than usual.”

“All because of us.” I sigh wanting nothing more than to hide in J’s protective arms.

“Hey, it’s not your fault Levi,” Hagen says with a saddened voice. “I mean, it’s hard for everyone to just get over it, but can you blame them? He almost killed dad. Of course, Peter would be scared shitless and Damon pissed off, that’s natural, but that doesn’t make it your fault.”

When I don’t reply he continues.

“Look, when you first told me you’re mate was the beast we were all taught to avoid and fear, the thing that killed so many people in our pack and almost killed our father, I was not on board. I mean, if he succeeded, I wouldn’t be here today and that scared me. But then, I saw the look on your face when you said you found your mate... I’ve never seen you that happy Levi.” I tense and he chuckles. “I know its hard for you home sometimes, but with him, I could tell it wouldn’t be. He’s your mate for crying outloud, he’s made for you and there’s no fighting that. Just give them time, they’ll come around.”

“You really think so.”

“Are you kidding me? Our family may be full of stubborn fucks but we love each other and there’s no changing that.” He says with a laugh that makes me smile. “When Peter sees how nice your mate is, he’ll stop fearing him and eventually he’ll come around. Damon just needs to get over his ego and he’ll be fighting right beside you. Josey follows Damon, so she’ll be there too with an apology and Dad will be happy that you’re happy.”

“And Aiden?” I question hesitantly, the smile falters for a moment but he plasters one right back on and I know its for me.

“I’m not going to lie to you and say he’ll come around, because he probably won’t and you know that better than anyone.” He says as he raises to his feet making Caspar whine in his sleep. “He’ll probably reject it with his entire being, even try to kill him, but he won’t succeed.” I scoff and he raises a challenging brow to me. “He may try, but he’ll have to go through me first.”

My eyes widen at Hagen’s declaration before a forgotten warmth filled my chest, one of familial love that I hadn’t felt as of late. I raised from J’s lap to hug him, he laughs as I crash into him, squeezing him almost as tight as J did.

“I never knew you were this wise.” I say into his shirt.

“I like to think of myself as that super smart background character that people don’t realize is a total badass, so it’s fine.” He says and we both break out into a chorus of laughter.

As if swayed by the joyous atmosphere, J rose from his seat to join the hug. Wrapping his arms around the both of us, he surrounds us in his warmth with that death grip which makes both Hagen and I cry out for mercy but he doesn’t let go.

Hagen left soon after, leaving me with J once more and a much lighter chest that saw hope in the future for us.

------------

It’d been a couple days since that horrible day in which J went wondering through the pack and almost gave me a heart attack. Since then, we’d been making incredible progress. J had adjusted nicely to his new routine here and was much happier ever since I’d begun taking him out for runs.

I couldn’t keep up with him, not for long but that didn’t seem to faze him in the slightest. He’d seemed genuinely happy just to spend time with me outside the house, in the woods he knew so well in our natural forms. I knew he preferred being in wolf form so I’d made it a priority to let him run more often, it’d made him feel more comfortable and that was all that was important to me.

He’d also learned immediately that leaving the house without me was not an option. I knew it was unjust and limiting, especially because he was my mate. But I couldn’t risk it. Risk him getting caught by someone who recognized his scent, being brought to my father. I just couldn’t risk him getting hurt.

So we stayed inside, for the most part, we left for runs, hunts or little adventures when Aunt Katty would feel generous and teleport us somewhere far away and beautiful where we were never disturbed. J hated teleporting with a great passion, but he was growing more accustom with it and for the most part, didn’t mind because it meant we were going someone new.

But there was also troubles which bloomed daily. I didn’t visit the house anymore, not with the way everyone was still acting towards my mate and I. Hagen came over whenever he could and always raised smiles amongst us and Peter texted me every now and then to tell me he was sorry and that he needed time. Something I found to me progress and encouraging. Josey wouldn’t talk to me, wouldn’t answer my calls or even acknowledge me when I tried to approach her.

Dad said to forgive her because she was just confused, but he wasn’t much better himself if I was honest with myself. He didn’t visit the house anymore, he actually hadn’t seen J since that incident with Damon. He said he was busy, but I knew it was because he was angry so I didn’t push the matter.

Damon, I hadn’t spoken to him since that day when he called J a mutt. Just thinking about the way he looked at me that day caused my chest to ache unforgivingly. I was usually the first to apologize between us, even in situations where I wasn’t the part in the wrong. But I couldn’t, not this time. The truth was I didn’t know if I could even face him without breaking down if he approached me first, so there was no possibility in the near future of me approaching him first.

The icing on the cake, Dad had been on a warpath of sorts ever since learning of J’s presence. He trailed around Aunt Katty’s house often, hoping to catch him the minute he stepped outside of it. Little did he know that he was actually on the other side of pack lands, with me. I hoped he’d never figure that one out, not until I’d figured out how to keep everyone.

I didn’t want to lose my family and I most certainly didn’t want to lose J.

The first step to making that happen would be helping J get his memories back. It was something Aunt Katty had been working on since she saved us from Dad. She’d tried on multiple occasions to break down the walls which were blocking J from being Jayson, or at least unlocking that part of himself. We’d even tried going through Roger, but the wolf was equally as guarded though not through confusion as J, but guilt.

Today we were going to try something different and as I stared at an unconscious J, I couldn’t help but feel a little anxious. Aunt Katty was going to try something that involved both of us today and not only J, claiming it would be easier, she put him to sleep. At first, I wasn’t that worried but as I watched Aunt Katty prep her materials in the middle of our living room I couldn’t help but feel a little anxious.

“Stop sweating kid, you’ll make the big guy nervous too.” Aunt Katty mumbled while circling the area with some black dust.

“I’m just scared.” I admit and she chuckles.

“When have I ever put you in danger Levi?” She asks glancing at me with a smirk that oddly calms me.

“Never.”

“So why would I start today?” She asks sarcastically before getting back to work. “If it’ll make you feel better, I’ll tell you what I’m going to do.”

“Yes please.”

“Your mate went through something quite traumatic and damaging that made him sort of... delete himself.” She says tilting her head a bit. “But you can’t ever fully get rid of memories, the brain works like a large database, little remnants always remain which if accessed correctly can be revamped.”

“Like reformed or something?”

“Basically. Now, I’ve tried to do just that in about a million different ways but he’s dwindled down these memories to the point where there’s barely anything left. This is where you come in. As his mate, you have a unique bond to him, one which will allow me to connect the two of you. You also knew him as a child, if I find the lost pieces in your mind and connect them to his broken ones then maybe we can start putting a puzzle together. And if a few pieces of recovered, then a domino effect should happen inside for both of you.”

“They will all come back.”

“That’s what I’m hoping for, but this is just a theory.” She says with a shrug. “Now lie down, I can only keep him asleep for so long without getting bored.”

I do as she says, lying down beside my unconscious mate, I immediately take his hand in my own, the action soothing me easily. I take deep breathes, inhaling his scent as I prayed to Goddess above that this would work.

“You ready kid?” Aunt Katty asks kneeling above me. I look up at her and she nods reassuringly so I close my eyes and mumble a quiet yes.

As I start feeling my body relaxing and my mind groggy, I can that she’s putting me to sleep. Her fingers press at the right side of my temple before I’m launched into a dark abiss.

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When I tell you bitches, the next few updates are going to be mad! This story about to take a turn.

Hope you guys enjoyed, leaving thoughts please.

I plan to update next few chapters all together so it’ll probably take a while but trust that it’s going to be worth it. If I do them one by one, you’ll probably hate the wait more than usually so yeah.

Until next time,

Byeeeeeeeee humanssssssssssss

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