Rogue

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Chapter 44

If you haven’t seen my message board, I got into my 1st choice uni and I’m super happy about it. Thank you to everyone who responded with kind words and supported me through my little study leave, even though it left the books without updates. I’m just really happy it paid off. I also got my luggage back so I’m just over the moon.

Thanks again, love you guys.

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Levi’s P.O.V

I watch the pancake carefully, waiting for the moment when it was just the right number of air bubbles popping up before flipping it in the pan. I smile proudly when I see the other side perfectly golden and scrumptious. I leave the pan for a moment to continue cutting the fruits for our smoothies, Jayson may hate strawberries but he was fine with them in smoothies.

My smile grows at the thought of Jayson. My Jayson, my mate... he was all mine. I laugh a little at that, a few months ago the concept of a having a mate was inconceivable, now I couldn’t imagine life without him.

Jayson was literally the perfect man. I couldn’t find one flaw in him and I’m pretty sure that would be the case, whether or not we were mates. I think anyone could agree that there was just something about him, something which even won over those who despised him.

He was sweet and kind, honest and thoughtful. He was selfless, he saw the emotions of others and acted based on that rather than his own feelings and thoughts. With all that, he somehow managed to be funny and playful when he wanted, he was everything somehow rolled into one.

He was in every sense of the world, perfect.

It made me proud to have such an amazing person as my own. With that in mind, I made a point of showing off his mark to whomever I could, whenever I could. I practically bathed in his scent, to the point he almost found it ridiculous because I wanted all to know that I was his and he was mine. Especially now that the rest of the supernatural world knew who he was, that included the pack who now knew he really was.

I slide the pancake off with a small huff as I recall the reactions of my pack members. Joy was not the primary response, that was certain. Anger and hysteria were more like it, alongside pack members threatening his life and then questioning my parents, their alphas, for accepting such a creature. There was pure anarchy and Jayson and I knew it was time to leave, but first, he did something I don’t think anyone thought he would, something no one thought a ‘feral mutt’ was capable of doing.

He apologised.

He made a point to say sorry to them all. He apologised to every single household he affected, every family which suffered from a loss at his hand, every mate who was parted from their second-half way too early. He apologised. Jayson did not even try to make excuses with his reasons - he believed they weren’t valid in regards to what he’d done.

Apologises didn’t magically fix everything, all the pain and loss was still there and still fresh now that a face could be put to the actions, but it helped some. When we explained our story, our journey and our own losses, it helped a bit more. Of course we didn’t expect to be welcomed with open arms, so it wasn’t a surprise that many still felt uncomfortable with Jayson in the pack.

So we were leaving. Despite Damon’s words, I chose to see it as the push we needed to do something we knew we had to and not running. Jayson and I always had to leave eventually, as he said before, we were alphas and were meant to lead not follow. It was about time I did what I was meant to do, about time I followed the urges I kept cemented and did what I knew was best for me.

The majority of the pack was happy with the news, the family... not so much. There were tears of course.

Peter wouldn’t stop crying, he still held red eyes every time I saw him even though we’d shared the news weeks ago. When we first told him, he got so worked up he couldn’t speak, chest heaving through his desperate whimpers and wet cheeks. When he managed to get a word out, he begged so impossibly hard for us to stay, begged so hard to keep the family together despite our promises to visit. Promising to fight for us, even if it meant going against the pack.

He was too pure for this world, Peter. It made me fear for his future, for a mate I knew he would eventually find. It consumed me to think that somehow could possibly take advantage of that purity. But if they were made for him, then they wouldn’t, they couldn’t.

I didn’t think it could get much worse until Hagen found out. Jayson tried to hide it from him until he was ready to face his best friend, but someone let it slip. I’m pretty sure he broke his tear ducts with the number of tears he released while clinging onto Jayson. They welled up still every time he laid eyes on us or remembered we’d be leaving in a couple of days. He wasn’t speaking as much anymore, head hung low and lips always wobbling. His sadness caused constant daggers to be shot our way by Nikola. I think seeing him so broken up about it hurt Jayson more than Hagen could even imagine.

Julian surprised me the most with his reaction, showing me that Damon got his violence from him, somewhere deep inside, and not Aiden. Threatening words spewing out about how he could ‘teach’ the pack to accept us and ‘make them see’, his tone emphasized the meaning behind the words. His eyes were blazed with rage and when we told him we were going regardless, he lost it for a little moment. After that, dad wouldn’t speak to me for a while, so incredibly upset and sad that he wouldn’t face me, couldn’t face me. It wasn’t until Aiden talked to him that he came around a bit, he still had little words when we spoke - it was hard for him.

I understood. I was the first to leave the nest I suppose and probably the only one. Werewolves were family creatures, we didn’t venture out much beyond our pack. We lived and died with them, I don’t think dad ever truly prepared himself for the probability of one of us leaving and it tore him apart to see it happening and not be able to stop it.

I understood in situations like these why mates were so important. Despite his tears, Po seemed to understand better than anyone that we couldn’t stay here forever. Seemed to force his brain to think logically, to recall all our conversations about what I’d do in the future, where I was supposed to go, my need to explore beyond the pack. Even if we were to win over the pack, it wouldn’t work. We had to live our lives, outside of the pack and he got that. I wasn’t too surprised, after all, he always understood me the most.

So we were leaving and even though the news was shared over three weeks ago, preparations being put into place and things slowly leaving the house - the tears were still running rampant in the household.

I don’t think the reactions would’ve been so bad if we weren’t going all the way to Canada.

I didn’t know anything about Canada besides the fact that it was cold, I was born there and the capital was Ottawa.

Jayson and I had been conversing with some representatives from The Supernatural Board, trying to find the best way to go about building a pack from scratch. It turned out, rebuilding our old one was it.
The land where we once were was left unclaimed and vacant, they were open to us moving there and building more of the values practiced in our own pack. We were more than open to taking in those sole wolves who needed a home. A home like we needed when we lost it all, we’d try to protect as many as we could from suffering a fate like our own.

We were also taking in a lot of stray pups who didn’t have anywhere to go or any packs willing to take them for various reasons. If it weren’t for Aiden and Julian, I would’ve ended up like them and I didn’t want that for anyone. So even if they were an omega or a rogue pup found all alone, we were taking them in.

Things were falling into place and for once I felt happy with the path I was taking, it was my own. Entirely my own and it made a small spark in the darkest parts of me ignite with the future that was to come. Excitement filled my veins at the prospect of exploring a new avenue of myself, especially because I’d have Jayson right beside me the whole time.

“Something smells really good.” Jayson groans as he walks into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes tiredly as his sweats hanging on his hips.

“Thanks.” I reply smiling as I plate the last of the pancakes besides the stacks of bacon.

Jayson comes behind me, wrapping his strong arms around my stomach before tucking his head into the crook of neck. I lean back into him naturally, fingers curling around the spatula as he presses a kiss to the skin there cause a shiver to run through me.

“I can’t stop touching you.” He mumbles against my skin and I laugh because it was true. Ever since he came back from his little road trip with dad, he quite literally couldn’t keep his hands off of me and I was certainly not complaining.

“I don’t want you to.” I reply honestly, he smiles against my skin before pulling his head back. I turn my own to look at him and I’m greeted with a kiss. I hum against his lips, parting mine instantly so our mouth can caress one another. We slowly melt into one another, the spatula slipping from my fingers as I push myself up on my toes to get more. When the metal hits the counter, I jump back in surprise making him laugh.

“Breakfast and then,” He whispers against my ear, tongue running its course, “and then, dessert.”

He pulls back after nibbling on it a little, inciting a small whimper from me which makes him smirk. He grabs the plates and makes his way to the couch, leaving me to finish making the smoothies. I do so speedily before joining him on the couch where he’s waiting with our untouched plates. He takes a sip from the glass before sending me an accusatory glare.

“This has strawberries in it.” He states before taking yet another sip.

“Yeah, but you still love it so be quiet.” I reply, drenching my pancakes with syrup before stuffing my mouth with a piece of it. I chew happily, eyes rolling at the fluffy goodness before my eyes refocus on my mate who devouring his food as well. I look around at the living room lazily, the space almost as vacant as it was when we first moved in.

“What are you thinking about?” Jayson asks after swallowing, eyes wide with curiosity.

“It’s kind of hard to believe that we’re actually going.” I reply with a helpless shrug. “Seemed like only a concept a few weeks ago.”

“There’s no need to rush it Levi, if you need more time we can wait a bit longer.” He replies gently, eyes softening as worry begins to fill them.

“No, that’s not it.” I dismiss when shaking my head. “It’s just hard to imagine that this place, this land... won’t be home anymore.”

Jayson places the plate down on the small table, taking mine from my hands and doing the same before he draws me into his lap. I curl into him without a complaint, releasing a sigh of relief when his warm completely engulfs me and he presses a gentle kiss to the top of my head. He waits for a moment to pass before he speaks.

“This will always be your home Levi.” He says before taking a pause as if choosing his next words carefully. “Everyone you love is here, you grew up here, you found yourself...here. No matter what we build out there, no matter if you call it home - this will be home. There’s nothing wrong with having both, with holding onto this.”

I smile against his chest, nodding at his words as I take them in and let them settle in my heart. It helped to hear it, helped to hear my thoughts on someone else’s lips. It was hard sometimes, a paradise at other moments - it was home.

“Are you excited to go back?” I ask tentatively. Jayson knew my memories of our former pack weren’t as fresh as his, vague at best though I could sometimes piece together parts of our past. I knew he remembered what it was much better than I ever could.

“No.” He voices, knuckles running up and down my arm. “It’s where I lost it all, where I saw everything torn away from me. Last time I was there, it was just bad memories... but I want to rewrite those now. I want to build something better and stronger than what was there, so that everyone we lost can be proud to know we didn’t let them go forgotten.”

Silence falls between us and we leave it there. Relishing in one another’s touch until we were both sated, comfortable enough to pull apart and continue eating. Grievances lessened and were less painful when you were sharing them with someone else, same went for fear.

We had one another and that’s all we needed to be okay.

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“I see a man running.” I say pointing upwards only to receive a scoff in response.

“That is clearly a toilet.” Po says making me frown deeply as I glance across at it.

“How is that a toilet?” I ask bewildered, glancing between him and the shifting cloud completely confused.

“How is it a man?” He counters and I force myself to drop the useless argument about the nature of a damn cloud.

We continue pointing out the shapes and figures we spot in the clouds, sometimes seeing the same things and other times, not so much. We were perched on a ledge we found deep in the forest, we’d been exploring it together in the past few weeks. Without Jayson to be aware of, we were free to explore the lands beyond the pack and made an activity of seeing as much of it before we left.

Tomorrow. We’d be going tomorrow and just the thought of saying goodbyes made tears fill my eyes. I push away the impending emotions before Aiden could see.

“Do you remember it?” He says suddenly, cutting me off while I explained the frog I saw in the clouds above us. “Remember the day we found you?”

My mouth runs dry, a sudden heaviness settling over the two of us. I part my lips but nothing coming out, it was like my body knew that if I said one word, the tears would follow.

“Not the moment we found you, the day.” He corrects as if sensing that I was thinking about the factory. “You woke up in the healing center and dashed straight for the door.” He says with a chuckle, lips spreading in a wide smile. “Nearly broke it trying to open the damn thing.”

I frown slightly, my memories stopping short in the factory and waking up in the house later on. I didn’t remember this, I peer over at him and he catches me gaze, my silent plea for him to continue and he does.

“Julian was being Julian. Trying to get your name, pack name and damn security box number.” He snorts as he sits up a little. “You wouldn’t say a word. Not a single word, just glared and frowned. I thought you were a little brat.”

I chuckle helplessly at this and his smile widens as he glances at me, eyes filling slowly as he studies me. Eyes darting around my face as if silently comparing my features then to my features now.

“We decided to leave because you weren’t responding, we thought we’d let the pack correspondents deal with you.” He says and a frown forms slowly which he catches and nods. “That was the end of that kid, would probably have checked up on you and made sure you were okay until we found out more about you. But that was supposed to be that.”

“W-What changed your mind?” I ask shakily, he eyes me for a moment and somehow his smile grows even louder.

“A scream and a bloody mouth.” He says simply and my frown deepens more because of it.

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

“You bit one of them not more than a minute after we left the room.” He explains with a helpless laugh. “You bit them and you came out running, came running straight for me.” He says as he takes in a shaky breath, his black eyes glazed as he holds mine. “I leaned down and you didn’t hesitate to come into my arms. Held you so tight so you wouldn’t get away again, held you because I knew that’s where you belonged.”

“Dad..”

“Julian thinks he was the first to get attached.” He says before he clenches his jaw and shakes his head. “The moment I had you in my arms, moment your little fingers held onto me... I was hooked.”

I crash into his arms before he can even finish, squeezing onto him tightly as he hugs me back. I cry against him, tearing pouring from my eyes as my body trembles in his hold. Wanting and wishing I could stay, wishing I could go back to that day for a moment, go back to it all just for a moment. He cries against me, silently shaking as tears wet my shirt, gripping me so tight I didn’t want to let go.

“I thank Goddess all the time, that you came to me that day.” He croaks into my shirt and I grip him tighter. “You’ve made my life better because of it and I love you so much, for coming into my life Levi.”

“Dad.” I sob again because I didn’t know what else to say. Didn’t know how to tell him that he was the one who made my life better, that he was the one who saved me and loved me. The one who treated me as his own and protected me like his blood. Didn’t know how to tell him how grateful I was for all he did for me, how proud I was to be his son. Didn’t know how to tell him any of that without breaking down completely in his arms.

“You come and visit, a-all the time.” He demands and I nod against him. “You call me whenever you need anything. Anything Levi, I don’t care what time, you call me.”

“I will.”

“I-If anything happens, you come home. I don’t care if Jayson says no, you come home whenever you need to.” He says firmly, fingers gripping me tighter.

“I will.” I promise and don’t pull back. I didn’t want to see his face in tears, didn’t want to see his crying because Goddess knows I wouldn’t leave tomorrow if I did. “Dad?”

“Yeah kid.” He mumbles.

“Thank you for being my hero.”

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Bitch, I’m crying! Fully sobbing in my room and every time my mom passes she asks if I’m okay.

Fuck me! An emotional Aiden = an emotional me. Like I just can’t with this father-son beautifulness, I really can’t.

Thoughts???

One more chapter!!!!!!! Still a little shook its coming to an end but that just means new beginnings and by that I mean tears - lol Damon’s book should be a doosey. Who even says that anymore, did I even spell it right? I’m disappointed in myself.

Hope you liked, thanks again for lovely wishes.

Until next time,

Byeeeeeee Humanssssssssssss

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