A frown forms on my lips when I stretch my hand out for Emitt but only find the sheets, blinking my eyes open, I peak over to see his side of the bed was indeed empty.
I throw on some pants before going downstairs where his scent was the strongest, I walk towards the living room rubbing my tired eyes knowing he’d be there his quiet sobs gave him away.
Walking into the room, I immediately head over to his curled up form to find him crying into himself like he had been doing a couple times for the past two weeks. I immediately walk over to him and pull him into my arms that he dives into happily.
“Sshhh!” I shush him as he sobbed into my chest, tears soaking into my skin as he continued to cry with a heart wrenching sound.
“He’s not coming back.” He says through his sobs.
“Yes he will, it’s only been two weeks Emitt.” I say holding him tight. “He’ll come back.”
“How did this all happen?” He cries looking at me for answers I didn’t have.
“I don’t know baby, Julian isn’t talking to anyone.” I say making him frown as his eyes fill with something dark.
“I’ll make him talk.” He says in a low growl before pulling himself from my grasp and heading outside our house with violent steps towards the pack house.
It’d been three weeks since we moved into our new house and two since Aiden left Julian. It was a shock to everyone, especially Emitt, he didn’t believe it when they first told us the news. He didn’t believe it when we went searching for Julian who was looking desperately for his mate, he didn’t believe until Julian was found a week later crying his heart out and locked himself into their suite after with no communication to anyone else.
I don’t think he really even believed it now. He kept saying how Aiden would never leave Julian, the pack, him. It hurt him too much for it not to hurt me, the lost of his best friend was taking a toll on him.
I followed after him knowing this was going to be unsuccessful, Julian locked the elevator doors for their suite so there was no way in yet Emitt stood determined.
“Let’s go home.” I say behind him calmly as he tries to wrench the doors open with his hands, he’d get it eventually if I left him but I rather him not damaged the new thing.
“No.” He growls as he exits the pack house and looks around the large building.
“The only way in there is through the elevator or the window and unless you’re going to g-”
I’m cut off by the sound of glass breaking from the large rock Emitt threw at the window of the suite on the top floor.
“Emitt!” I call as he starts climbing the wall with determination fueling him higher and higher. I groan as I start to do the same knowing he wasn’t stopping until he talked to Julian.
Once inside my heart squeezes at the dead atmosphere that filled the once lively suite. The sunlight was the only source of life and there wasn’t a single sound to be heard in the entire suite.
“Aiden! Is that you?!” Julian’s hoarse voice fills the abandoned apartment as he stumbles into our eye sight.
It broke my heart to see my friend like this. They were heavy, dark bags under his eyes and his skin was seeping into his bones, he looked paler than ever before with dull lifeless eyes I wasn’t accustomed too. There was a twinkle of light in them but it faded away when his eyes landed on us.
“What do you want?” He drains with disappointment as he looks at us, he wasn’t upset at our presence, he was sad. Sad that we weren’t who he wanted to see, that we weren’t his mate.
“Julian you need to eat.” I say walking towards my friend who looked at me almost like I wasn’t there. “I didn’t know you were starving yourself to death up here, you’ll be gone by the end of the month if this continues!”
“I’ve tried.” He mumbles into himself. “Every time I drink something I vomit it out, when I try to swallow my food my body rejects it. I can’t eat...not without Ai-....not without him...”
“But he’s not here.” Emitt spits aggressively making Julian flinch. “Aiden’s not here because of you.”
“Emitt!” I call harshly but he ignores me as he stomps his way over to Julian who looked like he was on the verge of tears. I stand in front his path, stopping him from getting any closer not knowing exactly what he’d do to Julian in this fit of blinded rage.
“You drove him away!” He shouted pushing at my chest to get to Julian who shook in his spot with wide eyes that tears were seeping out of.
“I-I didn’t mean to.” He replies shakily. “I didn’t mean for any of this t-to happen.”
“What did you do to him?!” Emitt growled viscously completely forgetting that Julian was his Alpha and could rip him to shreds easily for being so disrespectful.
“Emitt stop!” I shout grabbing his shoulders.
“What did you do to my friend!” He shouted over me. “I know it wasn’t him! It was you.” He says with eyes that began to swim with tears. “So what did you do to him.”
“I didn’t mean to.” Julian sobbed as he sank to his knees. “He w-was ignoring me. He wouldn’t talk to me as much o-or want spend time together like we’d always done. H-he wanted to keep to himself and I felt rejected......so I made a stupid plan to make him jealous.” He cried into himself as he clutched his knees tightly. “I let some guy t-touch me a bit for A-Aiden to see...he almost killed him. I stopped him b-but... he was different....he looked viscous...deadly. I tried to a-apologize....say t-that I was sorry, that I wouldn’t do it again. But he wouldn’t listen......h-he said I didn’t love him.....”
“And then he left.” I finished for him as he cried even harder on the wooden floor.
“I-I didn’t mean for this to happen.......I didn’t think h-he’d leave me.... I didn’t.” He stutters wailing in his spot, I squatted down to hold him close as his thinned form clenched onto me desperately, he was cold to the touch. Lifeless.
“How could you be so foolish...” Emitt snarled from behind us, a look of unforgiving hatred in his eyes.
“Emitt, not now.” I warn knowing Julian was already killing himself inside.
“He loved you!” Emitt shouted loudly. “He was head over heels in love with you! Aiden hasn’t been able to open up to anyone for years and he chose to open himself up to you and you did that to him, you betrayed him! The way he talked about you sometimes, like you were an so precious. You are precious to him, you are everything to him a-and you go and do this........you hurt him like this. You disgust me.”
“That’s enough Emitt!” I shout my voice booming as my eyes glowed threateningly. He watched me for a while challengingly before walking away in boiling rage and climbing out of the window.
I turn my attention to Julian who was trembling in my arms as he cried mumbling words of apology that I knew weren’t meant for me. I just hold him tight and try to make him calm down as we sat there, he was worse now thanks to Emitt and I didn’t know if he’d even make it to the month.
“Emitt’s wrong Julian.” I whisper to him. “Even though you messed up, doesn’t mean this is all on you. He was in the wrong too for ignoring his mate, I’m sorry this happened to you, but I promise everything will be okay.”
“H-He’ll never come back.” He sobbed into my chest making me frown. “I-I drove him away, I b-betrayed him.....I’m d-disgu-”
“No you’re not!” I say before he could finish the word. “You’re not and don’t you dare say that.”
“I miss him Beckett.” He cried into my arms. “I miss him so much. His smile in the morning, his laughter, his v-vegetarian jokes....I miss him.”
“I know.” I say holding him tighter. “I know.”
“Emitt!” I shout slamming the door behind me as I make my way to our bedroom with heavy steps and clenched fists. He sits up from the bed when I enter our room, his eyebrows crossed as I make my way towards him. “What the hell is wrong with you?!”
“What?! You heard what he did! He be-”
“He made a fucking mistake!” I growl walking towards him slowly, his eyes widen in surprise as I barely swore, especially when I was mad. I’ve always tried to be calm in situations like these, but I couldn’t, not now. “He was being neglected and acted out! Yes, it was dumb! Yes, it hurt Aiden! Yes, he deserves to be told off but not by you! Not by anyone but Aiden! It’s not you’re place to say the things you said to him!”
“But he h-”
“He what?! Felt lonely? Rejected? Ignored? Unloved?!” I shout making his eyes soften. “It wasn’t his fault alone! It was also on Aiden! So don’t you dare put all of this on Julian.”
“Maybe I went too far..” He begins but I just scoff.
“You mean by telling him that he betrayed his mate, that he was foolish.......disgusting?" I spit feeling repulsed that he would say that to Julian, he flinches at my tone as he stares at me with regret that I didn’t care about. “How could you even call someone that after what you’ve been through?”
This makes his eyes fill as his mouth drops a bit, he’d started opening up to me recently about how he struggled with being gay before. How for a while when we started dating he thought he was ‘disgusting’, he also said that was one of the words his parents called him but that was as far as he’d go.
And for him to use that same hurtful word on someone knowing quite well how much it hurt to hear it, it was not only disappointing but sick.
“I’ll go apologize.” He offers desperately as he slides out the bed.
“Don’t bother. He won’t be forgetting those words any time soon, he already thinks they’re true.” I say making his lip wobble as he stared at me. “So good job Emitt, you just kicked someone who was already down.”
“Beckett!” He calls through sobs as he clenched onto my arm when I tried to leave but I snatched it away making him flinch.
“Didn’t you see how he looked?!” I snap as I tower over him. “Didn’t you see how much this is affecting him too?! He was already blaming himself for what happened and you just had to go and make it worse.”
“I’m sorry.” He cries as he tries to touch me again but I shift before he can.
“He hurt Aiden and it made you mad. So mad that you said some nasty things to Julian, I get that now. How mad you felt because he hurt your best friend, especially since you just hurt mine.” I finish before walking away and leaving the house, ignoring his cries and pleas as I shifted and ran away needing to clear my head.
Aiden, where are you?
I let out a frustrated sigh as I dangled my feet over the cliff top that I’d settled on in exhaustion.
I’d been here before, I didn’t realise it until a few moments ago. I guess my legs naturally took me here when running away from the person who led me here the first time.
This was the place I found Emitt on my coronation day, where he came thinking that I wasn’t his mate. He was so doubtful of our relationship back then, now he was anything but. He told everyone he saw that I was ‘his man’ and that if they tried anything he’d kill them.
The thought makes me chuckle before a wave of depression hits me again, one of Emitt’s telling me he was in pain. I knew I was too hard on him but I got so mad, he treated Julian horribly and that got to me. I didn’t regret it but I wasn’t proud of myself either.
Deciding to go back and sort things out, I stand to my feet and turn around. Stopping in my path when my phone rang loudly.
How the hell do I have reception here?
I slip my phone out of my pocket answering it without checking as I placed it to my ear as I start back walking.
“Hello.” I say lazily as I jump over a large stone.
“Good afternoon Beckett.” My body freezes as a cold chill runs down my spine at my mother’s voice.
I feel my heart beginning to pound in my chest as my brain pulses, panic washing over me as it’d been the call I’d almost forgotten I was expecting. I wasn’t supposed to do it like this. I was supposed to do it with Emitt or Uncle Jack at my side to help me through it, to prevent me for apologizing about who I was. To make sure I wouldn’t cower beneath their words.
“Hello mother.” I reply after clearing my throat, my voice shaking as I gulped nervously.
“I was just calling to check in, see how things were.” She drags with an uninterested tone, she sounded colder than usual, deadlier.
“I’m fine.” I reply quickly.
“Good, good.” She says making my heart beat faster something was wrong. “Because you’re coronation pasted a long time ago but yet you haven’t seen to find a mate have you?”
“No.” I reply with out thinking. Tobias growls at me, snapping and scratching at the surface for me to correct myself since I had inadvertently just denied Emitt. A wave of regret immediately flooded my body as I opened my mouth to say the truth but don’t get the chance to as she continues.
“That’s weird because I heard the strangest rumor.” She slurs as sweat ran down my face. “Do you know what that rumor is Beckett?”
“It’s one about you being mated to the other Beta in our pack.” She says calmly as my heart froze and my eyes widened. This was it. She knew. Knew that I was gay. That I wasn’t the son she wanted, that I disappointed her. “But that’s only a rumor, right Beckett?”
She doesn’t believe it?
She doesn’t believe that I’m with Emitt, that I’m gay?
“Beckett?” She calls again.
I’m so fucking sorry