A new beginning

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II

A low growl reverberates through the dark night, Graham freezes in his steps.

“What do you think you’re doing?” He hears the low voice of his Alpha.

Slowly Graham turns around, avoiding his Alpha’s piercing glare. Even though there’s a pitch black darkness outside, the eyes of his Alpha seem to emit light.

“Don’t you know that it’s dangerous out there at night?”

Graham nods submissively.

“Then why are you about to cross our border, Graham?”

“I, err, I don’t know what to say.” He keeps looking at his feet.

“Look at me.” Graham slowly raises his head and looks at his Alpha. “There must be a reason why you are here in the middle of the night?”

Graham looks at his feet again and mutters quietly, “I was about to leave, Alpha.”

“What? Why? Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there on your own”

Graham nods. “I know, Alpha.”

“It’s not that you’re one of my strongest warriors either, Graham. What makes you leave the safety of our pack? What is so bad here, that you would want to leave?”

Graham sighs, feeling lost. “I truly can’t tell you Alpha.”

“It’s pretty simple, either you tell me, and I’ll let you go, or you don’t tell me, and I’ll keep you in my packhouse until you tell me, it’s your choice Graham.” The Alpha sighs, “I just want all of my pack members to be safe, so that includes you.”

There’s no way out of this. He’ll have to tell Alpha Deborah why he is leaving. She’ll never let him go otherwise. He must leave; he has to get away from this place.

Graham sighs. “I want to get away from my father, Alpha.”

“Why?”

“I, err, Alpha, I truly can’t tell you. Please can you let me go?” A tear escapes his eye.

Two heavy hands land on his shoulders, he feels the comforting aura of his Alpha, he feels her eyes boring into his, even though he doesn’t look at her. “Why are you leaving your father, Graham? He is my Gamma, he is a higher-ranked wolf, but if there’s anything wrong, I need to know. If you don’t tell me, I can’t do anything about it.”

Graham shakes his head; more tears spill on his cheeks and further down on his coat. “You don’t understand, Alpha. You wouldn’t understand.”

Alpha Deborah sighs, pulls her hands away from him and takes a step back. “What do I do with you, Graham?” she plays with her black braid deeply in thought.

“I’m sorry Alpha.”

“Sorry, for what?”

He looks up in her kind eyes. Showing nothing but friendship. Still, he doesn’t trust her, who knows what his father has told her about him. Who knows what lies did he tell her?

“I’m sorry for giving you a hard time.”

“Graham, you listen to me carefully.” Deborah is back in front of him in an instant. “You’re not a burden to me, you’re not giving me a hard time. I feel that there’s something wrong, and I’d like to know what it is. Your father is important, yes, but you are too, just as much, maybe even more, because you are the future of this pack. You know you will take your father’s position when it comes to it, right?”

Graham looks up at her astounded. “What?”

“You didn’t know?”

“I,” Graham shakes his head. “I never realised. I just- I am too weak to be able to be Gamma. I haven’t even shifted yet.”

Alpha Deborah frowns. “You never shifted? Doesn’t your wolf talk to you?”

Graham shakes his head. “My dad never allowed me to. And I don’t even know how to.” When he realises what he said, he puts his hands on his mouth. He unintentionally let something slip his mouth.

“Why is that?” Alpha Deborah’s eyes bore into his again.

“I don’t know Alpha,” Graham shrugs.

“I feel like there is more to this story. Come, come with me and we’ll talk about this in private. It is obvious that you don’t want to stay with your dad anymore, so I’ll give you one of my guestrooms in my house. How does that sound?”

“I- I don’t know.” Graham avoids her gaze and stares to the woods at the other side of the border. Freedom is so close, yet so far away at the same time.

“Just stay for one night, if you still want to leave after we’ve talked, you can. It’s much safer to leave in the day anyway.” Alpha Deborah still tries to persuade him.

Graham looks at her with hope in his eyes. “You promise?”

“I promise,” Alpha Deborah gives him a crooked smile. “Are you coming?”

Graham nods and walks after his Alpha.

When Alpha Deborah leaves him in one of her guestrooms, he sets himself on the bed with a sigh. This night went totally different as planned, hopefully he truly gets the chance to leave this place and start anew. At least, he’ll be able to sleep in a good bed, under a cover and he’ll be able to eat breakfast in the morning. And on top of that, he won’t be woken up by his drunk father who needs something or wants to punish him for nothing.

He gets up and walks to the bathroom. He could use a thorough shower. There’s a knock on his door, just when he is about to open the bathroom door.

“Sir? I was told to bring you some leftovers from dinner.” A female voice sounds behind the door.

Graham opens the door and takes the tray the female is holding. “thank you.” He says quietly.

“You’re welcome.” The woman smiles. “are you alright, sir?”

Graham smiles faintly, “yes I am.”

The woman nods, then turns to leave.

Graham closes the door behind her and walks back to the bathroom to turn on the shower.

Once underneath the shower he closes his eyes, enjoying the warmth of the water. It’s been a while since he had the luxury of a warm shower. His dad always refuses him a warm shower. If he were even allowed to shower, he would have to take a cold one.

He thinks about the future while wipes a lick of hair out of his face. This may be the last shower he’ll take in a while. He sighs, doubt flooring his mind. Is this truly a good idea?

Isn’t it a better idea to stay here, see if the Alpha believes his story? He shakes his head, no. No one will believe him and even of they did, everything here will remember him of his father, of his hate, his abused, everything.

He needs to leave, he needs to go. A new fresh start. Tomorrow, tomorrow he’ll leave, for real this time.

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