This is book 3 of The His Second Chance series.
When you lose your parents, you don't have the chance to think about how you're going to cope without them. Because once they're gone, they're gone. Then you just have to adjust.
And when they were gone I was left with my brother, Lucien.
What my parents failed to see was that my brother was a psychopath. He was dangerous and he was chaotic. Yet my parents still saw him as the golden boy, my dad couldn't wait to give him his Alpha title. My dad saw so many good qualities in him, strength, commitment and determination.
All I saw was a manipulative, twisted boy who always just wanted to get his way.
When my parents suspiciously died my brother wasn't sad, I didn't see him cry once. He just took the pack on his back and acted like nothing had happened. I knew that he had something to do with it, I knew he was that power hungry.
My parents died when I was twelve, Lucien became the Alpha at sixteen.
That's when everything started going downhill.
That's when he brainwashed the rest of the pack into thinking and believing in the same views as him. The views he had on women, the views he had on authority, the view he had on mates.
Giving him that Alpha title was like giving him a loaded gun, he just destroyed everything around him. He had no remorse, he had no emotions. He was a cold blooded monster and I was terrified of him.
When I was fourteen Lucien told all of his male pack members that if they found their mate, they were to be kidnapped and brought back to the pack house.
I saw many girls come and go and I felt sick to my stomach. What they did to those girls was unspeakable and I just sat back and watched like a passive audience member. I hated myself. I hated that I never did anything, those girls suffered.
Lucien would try and force me to take part in their vile activities but I refused, I wasn't like them. I couldn't be that inhumane.
So I got beaten black and blue instead.
I was scared for when Lucien would find his mate because I knew how vile he would be, it would be a hundred times worse for her.
When I was fifteen my worst nightmare came true. Lucien had found his mate but what made it worse was that she was human.
He found this as a way to humiliate her more because to him she was weak and she was an embarrassment.
Her name was Ava and she was scared, she was petrified.
I remember her dark brown eyes locking with mine in fear as she got dragged away into Lucien's pit to please his men.
I also remember crying so hard that my eyes burned red.
Now I wished that I did more, I wished that I could have done something. I was a coward.
The only thing I knew for sure was that if I tried to stop them, Lucien would have killed me and he would have never looked back.
Maybe it would have been worth it.
When I was seventeen I overheard Lucien tell his beta, Damien that he was done with Ava now. He was bored and he needed to get rid of her.
I knew that he had already rejected her but now he was going to kill her.
I had sat back for two whole years and done nothing to help this girl and now I decided that I needed to do something. She deserved better than this, she deserved a life. So that's when I decided to give her mine.
She was always locked up in the basement, when I knew that Lucien and Damien were out I ran down the stairs and unbuckled her shackles.
She was dirty, bruised and tired. I knew that she didn't have long left so she needed to get out of here now.
When she thanked me a guilty pang raced through my heart, she shouldn't be thanking me. She should hate me, she should despise me for sitting back for so long and doing absolutely nothing.
I don't deserve this life.
I was a coward.
Lucien beat me to pulp, he beat me so badly that my wolf stopped healing itself. My wolf no longer had the strength or the capability to heal my wounds.
I was a useless piece of nothing.
My vision was blurry, my ears started to ring, my heart slowed down.
This was it. I was finally going to die.
I saw my parents above the light, my whole body felt like it was being elevated. And just when I thought I was going to go, my eyes opened and I found myself laying on the cold hard floor of the pit.
Coughing up crimson red blood and spluttering it all over the floor, my lungs felt like they had collapsed, my ribs felt like they were broken beyond repair.
He didn't kill me but I wish he did.
A few months later the pack house was invaded, almost everyone in sight was killed.
Lucien, Damien and I were taken away.
I was scared because I didn't know what they were going to do to us, I had suffered enough. I couldn't bare the pain, I just wanted it to be over.
The guy who kidnapped us revealed himself to be Ava's new mate Jaxon.
I remember Lucien's eyes going wide at the idea of her having a second mate, then he laughs calling her pathetic and weak.
Jaxon hit him repeatedly.
When Ava saw us all, I didn't expect her to spare me or to feel sorry for me. I could have tried to help her but I didn't, petrified of my own brother to even attempt.
Ava told Jaxon that I was the one to let her go, he told her that he'll decide what happens.
I watched as Jaxon and his pack took away Lucien and Damien, I heard their screams as they were killed.
I felt nothing for Lucien, he deserved it.
So did I.
But he spares my life.
Jaxon's sister Lucy has powers to see into someone's past, she used her powers on me. Then tells Jaxon I'm "good as gold." That I let Ava go and I'm not like Lucien.
Jaxon doesn't trust me and I don't expect him to. They let me stay in their pack house under Jaxon's watchful eye, I try to be as transparent as possible and stay out of everyone's way.
Now all I can think is that I'm finally away from my brother and I can breathe.
Except I don't want to be here because I am a sinner.
And bad things happen to those who are sinners.