The Tragedy that was Kyrith Alvin

All Rights Reserved ©

9.

I wondered where to go from here.

I was discharged from the hospital after an attempted escape, had court mandated therapy for mental traumas and was just plain hopeless, and I felt jobless at the moment - considering even my paid vacation was making me feel jobless.

I was supposed to return to work in a week and I didn’t want to.

I wanted to stay on my couch in my barely lived-in apartment, and drink until my death, eating until I felt bloated enough to be able to float. I wanted to cry but my tears wouldn’t come and my heart still wouldn’t stop hurting. I wanted to breathe easy but I couldn’t do that either.

Most of all, I wanted to see him, hear him and breathe his scent in but that was not happening, of course. So, I pulled out my personal phone, plugged it into the charger and waited impatiently for the voicemails.

My inbox was full and while I still had his letter, his voice was much more needed. I listened to everyone of them, saved each of them - even the ones where he was completely drunk out of his mind or where his words really hurt.

" Hey, ratty, been a while. Are you okay? ”

" Hey. I-I don’t know why I feel like my voicemails aren’t reaching you. Let me know you can hear me, please. ”

" Ratty.” He sobbed. ” Please, for the love of god...are you okay? The precinct and your Chief - I hate her, just so you know - won’t tell me anything! ”

" Ratty, rata rata, tata, ratty! Missing you! ”

" Fuck, I was pissed drunk. Sorry for what I sent. ”

" Ratty...I am an alcoholic now. ” He laughed.

" I think I am never going to be hear from you again, am I? Why do you not respond to me anymore, ratty? ”

" Hey ratttyyyyy...I want to fuck you so much! I am horny as hell. ”

" My mum and my wife fucked me up. I fucked up.”

" I need you ratty, I need you. I need you, I need you! ”

" Therapy doesn’t always work, apparently. I am glad it worked for you. ”

“Guess wha-what? It doesn’t hurt when I am drunk. So, I have decided to st-stay drunk. ”

" So ...I was hiding about my therapy up until now, mum finally got to know and it was a night from hell. ”

“R-ratt-ty...she is pre- ” he sobbed. “She is pregnant. I...I didn’t want this ratty. It’s my mother and my wife - they forced me, I was drugged. ”

" I feel sick everyday. Like I can swallow but can’t throw up. ”

" I tried killing myself, didn’t work... Where are you, ratty? ”

" I am exhausted, ratty. ”

" I haven’t talked to my mother and father for a month, my wife has been quiet, avoiding me. I have anger issues now. ”

“Drank my ass off, fucked a sweet boy thinking it was you. I keep fucking up. ”

" I am pretty sure she’s scared. I have shredded my house and pretty much thrown her out but she came back because it is my child. ”

“I wish she and my mother would just stay forever away.”

" I feel sick. I feel sick. I feel sick. ”

“I hate hospitals, ratty. Make me remember you being patched up there. I hate them. But she is delivering today. ”

“It’s a boy, my eyes and my lips and my smile and her hair...I am glad he looks nothing like her. I’ll end up hating him, otherwise. ”

" I...ratty. Oh, ratty, I did something horrible, ratty. I feel sick. ”
" I almost killed a man for just looking at me. I was in a bar and drunk! I got charged for battery and assault. Guess, I am serving a sentence. ”

“Mother is going batshit ballistic.”

" She’s gone, my wife. I filed a chargesheet against her, the blame wasn’t a lie. Only difference is, I showed the victim to be a minor and unwilling - and not me. The parents of the kid agreed in exchange of money and a settlement in new city. ”

" She’s gone. ”

" I can finally breathe, ratty. ”

" I have named my baby Vidal Zyrith Okoro-Alvin. I hope he gets to live it. He won’t be raised like me. ”

" My mother visited, wanting to see Vid - I threw her out. My father got angry - I called the police. They are paying for battery and assault, and trespassing. ”

" I have restraining orders for Vidal against my parents. I feel relieved and that makes me sad, ratty. ”

" He is 3, he wants his mother. I told him his mother is dead, but yes has another daddy - Zyair. ”

" I am drunk again. Fuck, I hate this! I have a kid, and a hangover and a 4 year old don’t really go well.”

" Vidal wanted to see you - I showed him everything I had of you. He’s lowkey in love with you, ratty. I am kinda jealous. ”

" I feel sicker. ”

" Ratty...I am dying. I want to see you. Come back, ratty, please, just once. Call me back. ”

" I am worried about Vidal. ”

" I hate hate hate hate hospitals. ”

" I saw you today - smiling, laughing, kissing me and then cooking our favourite dish for Vid and I. I saw you ruffling his hair and sending him off to school and then coming back to join me in bed. I saw you, I wished I could touch you, too. ”

" I feel good, I see you more and more, and Vidal is 5 and I am happy. I am so happy. ”

" My doctor says I am loosing my mind. ”

" I wish you were here, Vidal won a swimming competition and an elocution. He is a math genius - he is trying so much to be like you, it’s crazy.” He laughed.

" I feel sick. I feel so sick, ratty. ”

" I am sorry I was a coward, Zyair, but I won’t lie, anymore. I love you, Zyair Okoro, I love you more than enough.”

You have reached the end of your voicemails.


Continue Reading Next Chapter

About Us

Inkitt is the world’s first reader-powered publisher, providing a platform to discover hidden talents and turn them into globally successful authors. Write captivating stories, read enchanting novels, and we’ll publish the books our readers love most on our sister app, GALATEA and other formats.