Not your Luna

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S E V E N

Mia

I stood there just staring at the man in front of me. His face just drowned me in pure horror and I had no idea why.

My heart thumped in my chest, it was all I could hear. Even if I tried to pretend I wasn’t scared shitless, I knew he would hear my heartbeat and it would instantly give it away.

I had no idea who he was, but I knew he made me uncomfortable. He had an awful vibe that made crippling thoughts invade every crevice of my head. He made me faint last time and it was not about to happen again.

He just scoffed and took a step closer. “Honestly, after that night you certainly have the guts to step foot into my pack again. You really think you’re going to take the power away from me and my daughter?” He asked and my eyes widened.

Of course, he was Katrina’s father.

“You think you are powerful enough to call this pack yours yet you can’t meet me in an open space and instead follow me into the bathroom like the coward you are,” I spat out and curled my fingers into my palms.

I composed myself and tried to walk past him, the terror mounting with each of my steps. I really couldn’t think straight with the way fear muddled my thoughts.

I was strong. I trained and taught self-defense, but we all had a weakness. And mine was people like him.

“Get out of my way,” I hissed and tried to get to the door only to be dragged back harshly and slammed to the door.

My heart lept into my throat and my eyes immediately blurred as his fingers curled around my throat. “Watch your words you slut. You don’t talk to me like that,” he growled and tightened his fingers causing a gasp to escape me.

I struggled trying to pry his fingers off. He had a strong grip that was no match against my trembling sweaty hands. “Stop it,” I croaked out as a tear slipped down my cheek.

I cursed myself for not being able to keep it in. I was good at keeping it together. I was good at faking all my emotions but with Katrina’s father in front of me, touching me, it felt all too real and familiar. I gave him the satisfaction of seeing me scared.

He moved his hands from my throat to cover my mouth, muffling my scream. “You will do as I say and you’ll leave before I make you.” He leaned in and spoke so close to my ear. Too close.

“Fuck you,” I hissed and gathered all my emotions. Being a trainer, I should have known what to do instantly. But I lost it.

I growled and kneed his groin before shoving him backward, causing him to stumble before I turned around and ran out of the door.

I could hear him cursing and groaning in pain as I made a run for the main door. I picked up my steps and began running. My heart was thudding, I felt hot . . . but I needed to keep running. I wanted to get away, I had to get away.

My vision began to blur again as I made it to the back of Damian’s mother’s house. I stopped by a tree and bent down, trying to catch my breath.

I angrily wiped my cheeks before looking up at the sky. The blue in the sky just always gave me clarity, that sweet calm air was a sense of freedom.

A sudden brush of wind blew past me, taking me out of my trance. I looked down at my hands that had turned red from my tight grip. I hated myself for letting him see me because I knew that he would come back. He knew my weakness. He knew the one way to get to me.

“Fuck,” I mumbled once I felt my tears threaten to slip again. I shook my head and hugged myself as I questioned everything. What was my purpose? What did I ever do to deserve having that constant fear living in my veins?

“Mia?” I heard Damian’s voice call and my eyes instantly widened. I had no idea what to tell him.

I quickly patted my cheeks and turned to face him, watching as his face fell and a frown took over. “What happened?” He asked and took a few steps closer to me.

I stared at the line that sat between his brows and bit my lips. I couldn’t lie. He would know. One, because of being my mate, and two, his damned heightened Alpha senses.

“Nothing.” I tried.

He sighed. “Don’t lie to me,” he said but it sounded more like a warning. “What made you run out like that? Is it my mother?”

I shook my head and cursed myself as I kicked my foot. I felt like a child being told off in school. “Damian please,” I whispered and bit the inside of my cheek, knowing that if I simply tried to tell him I would fall apart.

“Tell me what happened,” he repeated and held my chin in a firm grip. He stared into my eyes as if he were trying to read me and it scared me because I knew he could. He could see right through me.

“Katrina’s father,” I paused when his eyes narrowed. His Icy stare bored into me, making it hard to look away. His jaw clenched as he dropped his hand from my chin and clenched his fists as if he was ready to fight.

I contemplated just not telling him, seeing he reacted that way before even knowing what happened. He was going to lose it and I didn’t want that to happen. Not for me.

“What did he do?” He asked. A thread of warning in his voice.

“Nothing, I’m fine,” I managed to say with a smile and blinked away my new tears. I glanced around, not focusing on anything, just trying not to look at him.

“Fuck I’m sorry,” he mumbled and loosened his muscles. “Tell me,” he said in a much calmer tone.

“He came to the bathroom,” I blurted out, feeling my eyes burgeoning with tears at the memory. I felt like I was unable to speak through the lump that formed in my throat.

I looked up at Damian who stood there like a statue, holding it in together for my sake but I didn’t miss the way his lip twitched. I hugged myself again and told him everything and it only spiked his anger, so much so that he trembled.

Once that first tear broke free, the rest followed in an unbroken stream. Damian quickly bent forward and wrapped his arms around me protectively. “Where is he?” He asked but I just shook my head.

“No-no you can’t. I’m okay,” I said and wiped my tears, squeezing my eyes shut in hopes that the damned tears would stop.

“Fuck Mia,” he cursed with a sigh. “You’re not okay. You’re shaking and trying so hard to hold back your tears. Don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not lying. I’m fine,” I pushed him back and turned around. I couldn’t face him.

“You’re not always expected to be strong. You don’t have to pretend to be fine when you’re far from it. I see you even though you don’t want me to. You’re not good at hiding it,” he said and turned me around.

He held my chin and forced me to look at him. My shoulders dropped in resignation and for the first time in my life I couldn’t hold back an ugly sob that erupted from me. “You’re not used to having people there for you when you need it, huh?” He whispered as he pulled me into a crushing hug. A hug I needed my whole life.

He embraced me as my tears wet his shirt. I clenched my fists around his arm. I was suffocating with each breath I took as he ran his fingers through my hair in an attempt to calm me. His scent overwhelmed me yet calmed me at once. I loved being in his embrace. “I’m so sorry.”

Complete hopelessness washed over me as I gripped his shirt tighter. I was beyond damaged and he had no idea.

“Shh, Mia,” he whispered and pulled away slightly to look down at my face. “He’s not getting away with this. Even though we didn’t have a Luna ceremony yet, you’re still his Luna and he messed with the wrong Alpha because I will not go easy on him.”

“I froze,” I whispered through a cry and rubbed my neck. “I- I teach kids how to react in situations like this and then I myself froze,” I spat out angrily as I shook my head.

Damian’s eyes traveled down to my hands and I saw him grit his teeth at the sight of the clear bruises. “He’s lucky you need me right now,” he mumbled and replaced my hand with his own. “I promise you he’s not getting away with this.”

“C’mon, fuck this lunch,” he said and walked us over to his car.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated again as I sat in the passenger seat and he stood by the door. “I should have been there.”

“It’s okay.” I shook my head. It wasn’t his fault.

“Will you ever tell me?” He asked but I just shrugged. Maybe, just not so soon.

He hummed and reached his hand out to gently wipe my cheeks with his thumb. “I’m trying so hard for you,” he whispered before reluctantly pulling away and shutting my door.

I knew he was talking about me constantly shutting him off despite him doing everything for me. He held back from going after Katrina’s father just for me and I knew how hard and painful it was for both him and his Wolf to not lash out.

But I wasn’t used to having someone be there for me so suddenly, and I found it so difficult to let him in. To show him that I feel the same attraction he feels towards me.


***

The car ride was painfully silent. None of us had said a word and I just watched as he clenched and unclenched his fingers around the steering wheel.

“Why are we here?” I managed to ask once he parked the car in front of his office. A while ago, I noticed that we weren’t going to the house, but I had no guts to ask, not when he was angry.

“Because I don’t want to go home right now. I need to sort a few things out,” he said and got out.

I just stared at his door and bit my lip. He was acting strange. “Come on,” he said as he opened my door.

“You could have dropped me at the house.”

“I know but I’m so tired right now and I don’t want to leave you alone because you don’t talk to me. You keep pushing me away so I never really know what you want or what you need. So I am deciding for you that you don’t want to be alone right now. Besides, we keep each other calm and we both need that right now.”

I stayed silent and just walked beside him all the way to his office. “You can rest on the couch. No one will bother you here.”

“But-”

“Mia. Lay down.” He cut me off and cupped my cheeks. “You can skip training today, you need to rest.”

“I’m not tired,” I mumbled and stared into his eyes.

“I know you haven’t been sleeping well at night so yes, you are tired. I’ll be right here, don’t worry.”

I pulled his hands off my face and huffed, “I’m not worried. I just don’t want to lay down.”

“Mia lay down,” he said and began pushing me towards the couch, forcing me to fall back on it. “We’re going to have to talk about this you know? This . . . whatever it is that triggers you.”

I bit my cheek and just looked anywhere but at him as I fiddled with my fingers. What would he think of me if he knew? “No-no shit I never said you have to tell me now.” He brushed my hair back and helped me into a sleeping position.

“I’ll be here,” he whispered and got up to go sit at his desk. I swallowed my tears and turned my body around to face the chair so he couldn’t see me. I knew I couldn’t sleep and there was no point in trying.

That . . . Katrina’s father touching me like that was nothing new. Whenever my father did that to me I couldn’t fall asleep, and if I wanted to, I forced myself to stay awake until he fell asleep first.

The only difference was that now I had Damian by my side. He knew nothing yet he helped me. He calmed me and made me feel safe even though I never wanted him to.

I was so lost in my thoughts I didn’t realize someone else had walked in up until I heard his voice.

“How is she?” I heard Kyros ask and cursed myself. Did I cause that big of a scene that even he knew?

“She’s asleep,” Damian mumbled in a low voice as if to not wake me up.

“Do you think your mother purposely did that?” Kyros asked and I felt shivers cover my arms. Could she? Did she hate me that much?

“I don’t know Kyros. I don’t know how the fuck he knew where she was and I’m trying to hold it together because I’ve already lost control once for her. I want to rip him apart for ever touching her or even going close to her,” he paused when I shifted.

“All I could do was embrace her . . . It’s like she’s drowning but she won’t tell me why.” He lowered his voice.

“She’ll come along don’t worry. I mean you dragged her here remember? But about Edwin, I can do the work for you.” I could already see the smirk on Kyros’s face.

“Yeah then explain to the elders how Edwin suddenly died when I found my Luna? They’ll turn against us all.”

“You’re the Alpha, fuck are they gonna do? The pack is already brainwashed by Katrina. I see no difference.” Kyros said, the irritation clear in his voice.

“I think you forget that Mia is gonna be dragged into any shit we do. She’s already had enough and Goddess knows what else she went through because she won’t tell me. I’ve already dragged her into this Katrina mess, she doesn’t need more.”

“Right.” Kyros huffed. I shifted in the chair again and they both went silent before Damian cleared his throat. “What brought you here?” He asked, his composure totally different.

“The elders want to meet you . . . Both of you,” he said.

I couldn’t hold it back, I shot up from my sleeping position and stared at them only to find them staring back at me. The elders never did anything good, they never considered feelings and I’d be damned if they forced me into something.

“Fuck.” Kyros muttered and kept shifting his gaze between us.

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