“Shh you’re okay.” Xander whispers.
I slowly start to calm down and get my breathing in control.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“It’s okay if you don’t.”
“I want to.” Xander is the only person I feel comfortable to talk about it to. Plus I need to get it off my chest.
“His name was Mateo. He was the most sweet and caring guy. We met in college, we hung out almost every day. He would make me laugh and smile. One day he decided to ask me out. So of course I agreed, since he was a nice guy. But little did I know what his true colours were. A couple of weeks after we went on our date, he asked me to be his girlfriend, and I said yes.”
“You don’t have to carry on if you don’t want to.” I shake me head.
“No, I want to.”
“A couple of weeks after we started dating, he started to become verbally abusive.”
“Look how much weight you have put on!! Start losing some weight! Start looking like the other gorgeous girls out there!”
I quickly head into the bathroom and take a pregnancy test...
Flashback over ~
“I noticed I had put on some weight, but I didn’t think much about it, until I started becoming sick on mornings. I took a test and it was positive. I didn’t know what to do. It had only been six months since we started dating. I decided to make a doctor's appointment and get checked out. I found out that I was 4 weeks pregnant.
When I told him about the pregnancy he was furious.”
“You’re pregnant!!!!” I look down at my shoes not knowing what to say.
Mateo started destroying the living room, and I just stand there not moving an inch.
“You have got to be f*cking kidding me!!!”
“Let me tell you, I don’t want the piece of sh*t you call a baby! If I don’t want it, neither should you!!”
He takes long strides towards me and punches me in the jaw and I fall to the floor with a loud thud. He keeps punching and hitting me, even when I tell him to stop. I wrap my arms around my stomach to try and protect the baby. But it didn’t work.
Flashback over ~
“It started getting physical. He kept on beating me up, every day. One day it got to the point where he beat me up to the plump, and I was unconscious. When I woke up, I was in the hospital. Cora, Lisa, my mom and dad were there talking to the doctors and nurses. When they saw me, they instantly came to hug me, relief washing over them.
But at the same time sadness and guilt. I asked them about my baby, but they stayed silent. I kept on asking until to the point I was yelling. The words I dreaded to hear came out of my mums’ mouth.
“The baby didn’t survive.”
“My parents instantly hugged my while I cried and sobbed all night. I didn’t want to eat, I didn’t want to do anything. They were the ones who forced me to eat, to get out of the house. My parent made me who I am today.
A couple of weeks later, when I was finally healed I found out that Lisa was dead. I found out that Mateo had killed her, when she didn’t tell him where I was. I was devastated. She was my best friend from childhood, before I met Cora.
My dad went on a hunt to find Mateo. Who had disappeared into thin air. Three months later my dad found him in an ally making a deal with another gang. My dad shot him in the head from a distance without anyone noticing. When my dad came home and told me not to worry about him anymore. I lost two people who I cared and loved the most. I may have not met my baby, but I had already fallen deeply in love with it.”
I start crying and Xander just pulls me into him and starts stroking my back, trying to calm me down. I find myself drifting into darkness, exhaustion taking over me.
The next morning I wake up and find Xander sleeping soundly behind me. Not wanting to wake him up, I slowly move his arm around my waist and get up.
I head into my room and get ready for the day ahead. Today is the day of the ball. We are expected to be there by 8pm, so the girls and I decided to go and buy some dresses. I choose to wear a white crop top with some denim shorts, since it’s meant to be warm today.
Just then there is a knock on my bedroom door. I open and see Xander standing there, his hair all messy looking like he just woke up.
“Where were you?” Xander asks in a gruff voice since he just woke up.
“I came here after I woke up. You were still in a deep sleep, so I didn’t want to disturb you.” I explain. He walks over to me and pulls me into a tight hug.
“Well don’t do that again, I thought something happened to you. Plus I like sleeping next to you.” Xander explains in a sleepy voice. Why does he have to be so cute in the morning?
“Sorry. I didn’t want to scare you. You just looked cute while you were sleeping.” Xander lifts his head up from my neck and looks at me with confusion.
“What did you just say?” He says raising an eyebrow.
“I said you looked cute.” I say, trying to hide my smile.
“Cute you say?”
“Hm.” Xander stalks towards me and starts to tickle me. If you can’t tell by now, I’m very ticklish.
“S-stop.” I say between giggles.
“Am I cute now?” Xander asks while still tickling me.
“N-no.” I manage to say out, and he stops tickling me.
I catch my breath and he stands there smiling.
“Wipe that grin off your face. It wasn’t funny.”
“Yes it was.” I send him a glare, and he tries to hide his smile.
“Also where are you going dressed up?”
“Oh. The girls and I decided to go shopping for some dresses for the ball tonight.”
“Ok. Here take the card.” Xander hands me his black card.
“Wait, what? No. I’m not taking that. I can buy it myself.”
“Do you know how much those dresses cost?” He raises an eyebrow.
“Well I don’t care. Here take the card.”
“Nope.” I say and walk away.
I hear him muttering something under his breath which makes me smile knowing I won.
“Ready to go?”
This is going to be a long day…