Broken Rules 9: Aurora
“Aileen?” I’ve tried calling her several times and she hasn’t answered. Yet again I have her voicemail, “Hi, I’d really like to talk to you. Look can you call me back, please.”
Tallulah looks up from where she’s watching TV, “still hasn’t answered then?”
“No.” I’m trying not to get angry. My family have being keeping secrets from me; Aileen’s secrets. I know I’m probably being selfish. “I just feel sad that I wasn’t able to be there for her when she needed me most.”
“You just want to be her big sister,” She says gently as her phone buzzes with an incoming text message. She glances at the screen before turning off the back light and putting her phone down on the coffee table. When her phone buzzes again she ignores it completely. That’s not like Lou. She’s perhaps the politest texter I’ve ever known. She always replies, almost immediately.
I nod, “I feel like I’ve failed her.”
“You didn’t know,” Tallulah sighs as she wraps me in an embrace, “you aren’t responsible for that.”
“Are you okay, Lou?” I can’t help myself asking. Tallulah is still looking thinner than normal and I’m worried about her.
“Yeah, of course,” she smiles, but it’s not a real Tallulah smile. It’s brittle and only skin deep. It doesn’t touch her eyes.
My phone rings and I jump to my feet, answering it, “Aileen?”
“No darling,” it’s my mother.
“Mother,” I sigh. I’m disappointed.
“Were you expecting a call from your sister?”
“I’ve been trying to get a hold of her all morning.”
“She’s not answering?” she sounds concerned. I’m cross though. You’d think she’d be used to it by now.
“She very rarely does,” I try not to sound bitter.
There’s silence on the line. “I was phoning to see if you would like to go shopping.”
I’m surprised. I shouldn’t be; my mother loves shopping. “You need a dress for the fundraiser,” she pushes.
“Can I bring Tallulah along?” I ask, because truth be told; I don’t want to be alone with my mother right now.
“Of course darling. Will Tallulah and Cameron be joining us this weekend?”
I look over to Tallulah, she nods her head, “I’ll have to ask Cameron but Tallulah would love to come.”
“Will she be bringing a date?” there’s a split second before she adds; “will you be bringing a date?”
“No,” I tell her, “no date.”
“That’s a shame darling,” my mother will not be happy until both myself and Aileen are happily married off to nice, preferably wealthy men, “should I pick you up in twenty minutes?”
“Yes please,” I say before hanging up. My phone beeps and I pull up an email from Landon. It makes me smile. I quickly type out a reply.
From: Aurora Stone ([email protected])
To: Landon Peters ([email protected])
RE: re: Last Night
I’m looking forward to tonight too.
Intense? I don’t know if that quite describes it...
My email to Landon gives me an idea. If my sister won’t talk to me perhaps she will read an email.
From: Aurora Stone ([email protected])
To: Aileen Stone ([email protected])
RE: You’re Not Answering
So I’ve been trying to reach you and you are either really busy or you’re just avoiding me. I’m really hoping you’re busy. I went to mum and dad’s for dinner last night. They asked after you. They always do. Mum accidentally let some things slip. She told me about what happened; about Amelia.
I’m struggling to understand why you did it and I just can’t believe you never told me.
I’m really sorry. I never knew.
Any way I just wanted to tell you I love you. And I’m here if you ever need me.
There was so much more that I wanted to say but I couldn’t put it in an email. Tallulah smiles at me, “you’ve tried. That’s all you can do.”
“I know,” I smile back at her, “Tallulah, are you ever going to tell me what happened in Brighton?”
“Sure,” she frowns, “but not yet. I’m not ready to even think about it, let alone talk about it.”
“When you’re ready, you know where I am.”
“I know; I’m sorry,” Tallulah looks close to tears.
“Why are you sorry?” I pull her into my arms, “you’re my best friend. Whatever you need.”
“You’re welcome. We don’t have long before my mum gets here,” I give her a sad smile, “go put some makeup on and find some shoes. I love you, you know.”
“I love you too Rora.”
I make a quick dash for my room to grab my handbag before knocking on Cameron’s door. I know he’s in but I also know he has a guest. “Cameron!” I call through the door.
A moment later he’s stood in front of me, “hey, what’s up?”
“Mum wants to know if you want to come to the fundraiser this weekend.”
“Sure,” he grins, “you know me. I love a good party.”
“Great; she also asked if you need a plus one.”
“Are you taking Landon?” he asks.
“I don’t need to. He’s already going. His mum is just as big a fundraiser as my mum is.”
He chuckles, “I guess I could ask Zara.”
“Okay,” I grin, “I’ll let mum know. We’re going shopping. See you in a bit.”
“Are you ready Lou?” I call as I walk down the corridor towards the front door. My phone buzzes;
Darling, I’m outside.
Tallulah rushes out of her room, meeting me at the front door. “I love Stone shopping trips,” she grins.
“I’m sure you do,” in fairness so do I.
I’m sat in the dressing room whilst Tallulah and my mum try on dresses. I’ve already found the perfect dress so I’m now refreshing my emails every two minutes to see if my sister has replied. My phone rings and I answer it on the first ring; “Aileen?”
“Aurora,” finally, “you wanted to talk to me.”
“Did you get my email?” This is perhaps the most awkward conversation we’ve ever had.
“Yes. I’ve read your email. Aurora...” she stops, “Aurora, this isn’t something I want to talk about.”
“Is this why you aren’t talking to mum and dad?”
“Aurora,” she’s exasperated as if this is a waste of time, “you were always so good at doing what they asked. I wasn’t. I used to be jealous of you.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Tell you? Tell you that I got knocked up? How am I supposed to tell my perfect big sister that I fucked up yet again?”
“Ali,” I sigh, “you can tell me anything. Sometimes I need you too, you know.”
“Yeah right,” she laughs.
“Seriously,” I’m smiling, “I’m not all that perfect.”
“Yeah right; name one of mum’s rules that you’ve broken.”
“I like playing poker,” I laugh outright.
“I’ve broken other rules,” I’m blushing again, “especially recently.”
“You’re kidding.” I know she’ll never believe me.
“I’ve had help.”
“Who? You haven’t fucked Cam have you? Because he’s hot.”
Her words make me laugh, “no. Someone else.”
“You are having me on! Who?”
“Landon Peters,” I tell her.
“Peters?” She’s quiet for a second, “I know that name. Does he have a brother?”
“His brother is in my economics class,” she chuckles, “if he looks anything like his brother, he’s fit.”
I laugh again, “I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too,” I can hear people in the background, “look, Rory, I’ve got to go but I’d like to see you some time.”
“I’d like that,” I’m smiling now, “Bye for now.”
“Yeah, see you.”
I hang up just as my mum comes out of her cubicle, “was that Aileen?”
“Yes,” I reply, “I like that dress mum. It looks lovely on you.”
“Thank you dear,” she really is a very beautiful woman. She has hardly any wrinkles; just a few laughter lines. Her eyes are a deep blue. Everyone says I have my mother’s eyes. “Did she say if she was coming to the fundraiser?”
“She didn’t mention it,” the disappointment on her face is heartbreaking or at least it would be if I didn’t know that she’d brought it on herself.
“I’m sure she’s just forgotten,” she explains away the fact that her youngest daughter is apparently estranged from her parents, “she’s very busy with school.”
I can’t help myself. I can’t leave the subject buried, “do you really think having the baby adopted was the right thing to do?”
“It was the only thing to do,” she replies and I know she believes what she’s saying before she finishes, “that boy was never going to be any help. He wasn’t good enough for her. He would have pulled her down. And it would have caused a scandal.”
“A scandal?” I can’t believe that that’s what my mother cared about, “but surely that doesn’t matter. Isn’t it more important to have a happy daughter. You could have supported her; helped her. Helped with child care so that she could go to uni. Given her a job at the company?”
“We didn’t want that for her.”
“She’d made her bed. Why not just help her deal with the consequences in her own way?”
“Because it wasn’t the right answer,” my mother replies heatedly, “she wasn’t ready to be a parent; do you think parenthood is easy? She had no place being that baby’s mother.”
“She was the only mother that baby had,” I’m getting angry. It’s been almost two years but to me it all happened yesterday.
“Amelia has a mother and father who love her dearly. She is happy. She has grandparents. She has uncles. She has a family. She is loved.”
“Amelia already had a mother. She already had grandparents. She had an aunty. She had a family. She would have been loved by us.” I take a breath, “I would have loved her but I never even got to say hello to her.”
“Aurora, it wasn’t an easy decision.”
“It wasn’t your decision to make,” I frown, “the only decision you should have made, was to stand by your daughter no matter what she decided.” I know I’m about to step over a line and what I’m going to say will hurt my mother but I can’t bring myself to care, “I can’t blame Aileen for blaming you. If it were me, I’d blame you too.”
“Aurora, you don’t mean that,” there are tears in her eyes.
“I’ve done everything I can to be the daughter you wanted me to be,” I grimace, “I’ve kept every single one of your bloody rules, and do you know what I have to show for it; nothing.”
“That’s not true, Aurora,” my mother could never be described as weak. She says what she thinks, “our rules were there to protect you and protect you they did. Aileen broke the rules and she suffered for it.”
“Mother, that is very naive. The truth is that Aileen only broke the rules because she found it impossible to keep them all.”
“You managed it,” she says as if that proves the possibility of it.
“No I haven’t,” I laugh, “it’s not possible to be perfect. I like to play poker mum. I drink tequila straight. Your rules have smothered me, mum. The difference between Aileen and me...”
“Aileen and I,” mum says quietly.
“You’re so frustrating! The difference between Aileen and I, is that Aileen worked it out years ago. It’s taken me a bit longer.”
“Worked what out?”
“That I can’t live my life by someone else’s standards, someone else’s expectations. I have to make my own standards, have my own expectations. And for that to happen, I have to know what I want.”
“What do you want?” my mum asks.
“Good question,” I sigh, “I have no idea, because everything I’ve ever done has been orchestrated by you and dad.” I turn my head towards the window to give myself a moment to calm down, “I’m sorry. I’m ruining our time together.”
She doesn’t respond for a moment and I think she’s angry but when I turn to face her I see that she’s pulling herself together; putting her public face on. “Never mind. Let’s see if Tallulah has found a dress yet.”
“I think that’s a great idea.”
I’m in my bathroom getting ready for my date with Landon. Tallulah is sat on the side of the bath, “should we expect you home tonight?” she asks with a wink.
“I don’t know,” I reply honestly.
“I think you might need to visit the doctor,” Tallulah laughs.
Her comment surprises me but after a second I catch on, “birth control?”
“Uh huh. Condoms are great and all but you should really be on the pill.”
I nod, “okay. I’ll call the doctor tomorrow. Thanks mum for the sage advice.” Sarcasm has always been one of my mother’s pet hates; another thing I’d spent years avoiding or squashing down every time I was near her.
She chuckles, “you look beautiful.”
“Thanks,” I smile at her through the mirror. I’m wearing a blue dress that perfectly matches my eyes. It’s shorter than my mother would condone but it makes my legs look fantastic so I don’t care.
“Are you okay?” Tallulah is asking. She’d heard the bulk of my argument with my mum, “I can understand if you’re not.”
“I’m okay,” I say before applying lip gloss, “it’s all just been a bit of a shock.”
“I bet. I’m here for you, you know that, right?”
“And I’m here for you, too,” I hope that she realises just how much I mean that. For a second, I consider telling Tallulah all about how Landon knows my parents, how he managed to get my address, telephone number and email all without asking me for it, much to my irritation might I add, but I don’t want to. I know what she will say. She won’t like it and she’ll encourage me to end it with him but that is not what I want.
Maybe I’m being naïve but I really don’t he’s that bad now that I’ve gotten to know him a little bit better.
My phone buzzes to tell me that Landon is outside waiting for me. “So I look alright?”
“You look better than alright,” she grins, “you look...”
“Don’t say perfect.”
“You look beautiful. Now get out of here.”
I grab my clutch and make my way towards the door, “don’t wait up.”
“We won’t, you dirty little stop out,” Cameron calls from the living room.
“Love you too Cam,” I say before closing the front door behind me. Living on the ground floor has it’s perks and so I walk right out of the foyer onto the street where there is a black limo waiting for me.
“Miss Stone,” Henry greets me with a polite smile, “Mr Peters is waiting for you in the limo.”
“Great, thank you Henry.”
“You’re welcome, Miss Stone.”
He pulls open the door for me and I shuffle in as best as I can in my dress. Landon grins at me as soon as I’m beside him. “Hello Miss Stone.”
“Hello Mr Peters.”
I notice almost immediately that the privacy screen is up; we’re alone. Landon must have noticed the direction of my focus because he says; “last time Henry drove us I wanted to fuck you but I couldn’t. Now I can.”
I laugh as he picks me up and places me on his lap, “I’ve been thinking about you all day,” he tells me as he pulls the hem of my dress up.
“All day?” I ask as he moves the material of my panties aside so that he can touch me.
“All day,” he confirms before kissing me hard. It’s demanding. “Have you been thinking about me?”
“More than I care to admit,” I say honestly.
“Good,” he smirks, “I like you thinking about me. Tell me, what did you think about?”
I blush at the implication, but he doesn’t give me time to answer, “I thought about fucking you on my desk. Did you think about me fucking you?”
“Yes,” I answer. His fingers are inside me; they’re moving slowly. He’s teasing me. I want to come but I know he has no intentions of letting me; at least not yet.
“Tell me what you want,” he demands.
“I want you to let me come,” I answer brazenly.
“How do you want me to make you come?” he asks.
I think about it for a moment, “with your mouth.”
He chuckles as he removes his tie, “do you trust me?”
“Yes,” I answer because as much as I know I don’t really know him, I can’t help but trust him.
“Good. Give me your hands.” I follow his command automatically, “you’re so obedient,” he chuckles. He ties his tie around my hands before tying it to the headrest behind me. I’m breathing hard in anticipation of what he’s going to do to me.
He kneels down on the floor of the limo, directly in front of me. “Open your legs for me Aurora.” Again, I do as he says. “Good girl.” He pulls me towards him so that my bum is almost off the seat and the skirt of my dress is around my waist. He pulls my knickers down and pockets them and then his tongue is on my clit and I’m in ecstasy. Within seconds he has me moaning, “that’s it baby,” he says as he comes up for air, using his fingers on me once more. “What do you want me to do?”
“Fuck me,” I answer him, “please fuck me Landon.”
I’m not worried if Henry hears us. I know I should care. I know my parents would be scandalised by the idea of someone overhearing me having sex, but I don’t care. “Please Landon,” I cry out, “please fuck me.”
He flips me round so that I’m facing the headrest with my knees on the chair and he pounds his cock into me. It’s passionate and forceful and I’ve never felt anything like it. Every inch of me is on fire from his touch and I’m moaning and writhing with gratification. It’s not long before I feel him release inside me and the sensation prompts me to have a second orgasm. He pulls off the condom and flings it in a bin that I hadn’t noticed. He then unties my wrists and helps me right my dress.
“Can I have my panties back?” I ask him boldly.
“I don’t think so,” he replies, “I’m going to enjoy knowing that I can have you at any moment tonight.”
I blush at his words and I know for sure it’s not embarrassment. No, his words are turning me on. His words are making me wet and that’s not okay because I don’t have any panties. He smirks as if he knows exactly what I’m thinking and then turns towards the bar, “Glass of champagne?”
“Please.” I decide to let the panties thing go; I have a feeling he’s baiting me. He wants me to react. He pours me a glass of champagne and hands it to me.
“I think we should make a toast,” he says.
“To breaking the rules of course,” he chuckles, “because we wouldn’t have met each other if you hadn’t been so adamant that you were going to be... less than perfect for once.”
I grin, “to breaking the rules.” I lift my glass and he gently taps his against mine.
“Tonight, after dinner, I’m going to help you break another rule,” he tells me.
“Are you going to tell me what rule?” I ask, intrigued.
“Definitely not,” he laughs, “but I promise, you will love it.” I wonder to myself if I should be concerned with the way this man I barely know has managed to get telephone number and address without me giving it to him, not to mention the fact that he did lie to me about knowing my family. I’m uneasy but I put it to the back of my head. The last thing I want to do tonight is think about my family. I’m pretty sure I should be worried that he’s some sort of starker or something; especially after he admitted that he’d recognised me at the bar. He knew who I was before I even told him my name and that disconcerts me. I try to put it to the back of my mind so that I can enjoy our evening together but I can’t help but wonder where this is going. I’m so completely out of control; something that I’ve never really experienced before and as much as I’m enjoying it, it doesn’t stop me wondering if I can truly trust Landon Peters. On some level I know I do, but I don’t think it’s my wisest of decisions. In fact, I’m almost completely convinced it might be the worst decision of my life. He might prove not to be a stalker or a serial killer but he still lied to me and I don’t like that. Not just that he’s powerful and completely in control and that scares me. I don’t like surrendering but with him it comes so naturally. If I’m not careful, I may end up accidentally letting this man destroy me.