We shared a lot more ‘Carnal’ moments in the following months. Both between ourselves and with other people.
We also shared a lot of happiness and laughter. I could feel myself falling deeper and deeper into him, with every passing day. It was Valentine’s Day when he’d given me ample opportunity to tell him exactly how I felt.
“Would you give me the honour of this dance ?”
Ethan stood at the side of the circular wood table his hand held out. We’d booked a night at the Three Kings Hotel, they were holding a special valentines buffet and Disco. Annalise and Brett had come too. I accepted his hand, my feet wobbled on my heels as I stepped heavy footed to the dance floor out in front. We’d been knocking back cocktails since we had arrived there late afternoon. It was now gone midnight and the night just coming to an end.
“Where did you go missing too earlier Ethan ?”
My breath breezed against his ear, my arms were tight round his neck, our bodies circling slow motion on the spot. I had no idea what we were dancing too but the words were deep and were thudding right through my heart.
“I just needed to sort something out in the room.”
He told me his body moving closer into mine. Annalise and Brett had joined us on the floor.
“Wanna swap partners ?” Brett’s hand rested down on my shoulder.
“Not tonight!” Ethan’s refusal was quick, his arm raised from my waist brushing Brett’s contact away.
“Want me all to yourself do you!” I jested.
The look in his eyes making me choke on my laughter.
“Come on, let’s call it night.”
He whispered something to Brett before leading me out of the hall and down the long green carpeted corridor to the lifts.
“Ethan, what are you doing ?” I giggled as he lifted me off my feet.
Carrying me out through the lift doors he took me past a row of brown wood doors and inserted the key into ours.
“Shut your eyes Angel!”
I squeezed my eyes tight shut, my heart pounding hard against his chest. He lowered my feet to the floor turning my body in the opposite direction to him.
“You can open them now!”
“Oh my fuuuu-uck...Ethan!”
My eyes darted around the room, I could feel my legs giving way beneath me, his hands wrapped round my waist preventing me from dropping to to the floor.
“Wow, this is, this is fu*king amazing!”
A smile broke wide across my face, tears flooded out of my eyes. There was fresh sweet smelling flowers everywhere, the bed was covered in tiny shiny red hearts and lit candles along the shelf on the far side wall gave the room a soft warm glow.
“Shit, this isn’t the same room!” I gasped.
A four poster bed, white laced drapes hanging from all four sides.
“That was a normal divan!”
My voice shrieked with excitement, i threw myself on it. He turned to get something from the dressing table before joining me.
“Ive got something for you as well!” I told him accepting the card he placed inside my hand. “I’ll go get it!”
He stopped me as I attempted to leave the bed.
“Open mine first!”
“Aww, that’s cute!”
There was two adorable elephants on the front of the card, their trunks entwined, raised love hearts in their background. I opened it up.
To My Angel
I’ve not known you long,
Although I feel I’ve known you forever.
I hope on this day ten years from now,
There’ll still be an us, We’ll still be together.
LOVE Ethan Xxx
My eyes were blinking over the words, the card was shaking inside my hand,my free hand was cupped round my chin my fingers pushing the skin upwards over my cheek.
“Oh my God Ethan, that’s beautiful!”
I dropped the card throwing my arms round his neck, my tears leaving black remnants of mascara all over his crisp white collar.
“I got my enrolment form through last week for college.”
I gazed up at him. His face looked pained, unsure.
“It’s gonna be a whole new life Angel!” He paused, his fingers pushed agitatedly through his hair.
“I’m not sure Im ready to end this one!”
“Hey, you wanna own your own sports complex one day, you can’t give up on it all Ethan. I’m gonna miss you so badly, but we won’t lose touch I promise you!”
“I got this for you as well!” He dug his hand in his pocket, my jaw dropped as he handed me a little red velvet box.
“Look, you don’t have to see it as an engagement ring or anything like that. I, I just... I wanted to get you something special, something meaningful that’s all!” His stuttering got me even more tensed up.
It took me three attempts to lift the lid.
“It fits your ring finger, but you can wear it on the opposite hand if you prefer.”
I rolled it down my finger, pushing over my knuckle with ease.
“I erm, I measured you with one of those ring things while you were a sleep!”
“I don’t no what to say... It’s beautiful Ethan!”
My tears started back up again. Damn, this was my opportunity, my chance to tell him how I felt. Yeah, it had not been much more then a month but what I felt was real. Even with all the hints he was throwing at me I still couldn’t shake off this fear that if I told him I was in love with him it would push him away, and that thought scared the fu*king life out of me.
I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs that I loved him, get down on my knees and beg him not to leave me, despite my persuasion that college was the right step. He’d worked so god damn hard to achieve his goal, the trophies he’d so proudly shown me, the time and effort he put into keeping himself so impeccably toned, so fit. Who the hell was I to expect him to drop it all for me.
I knew he cared about me deeply, I still reminisced quite often over the night he’d actually said those three magic words.
I was convinced his feelings were strong, if not as strong as mine. I pondered quite often on the thought he maybe waiting for me to say it so that he could say it back. That maybe he was as scared as me. And what if I took the risk. confessed my love for him, and I hadn’t judged his actions wrong? What if I’m right and he was in love with me too? He was already struggling with the thought of going to college, going to London. What if I ruined his Dreams.
And then what if I was wrong... All the things he’d said, things he’d done that pointed to love, were just all nothing more then spur of the moment words and actions, read into far too deep. What if we were both wrong about our feelings ?
Then I really would feel like I’d destroyed his future, fu*ked up his one chance!
No, he had to follow the path he was heading, even if that meant we’d drift apart. I could not, and would not complicate things for him, not more then I already was. I slid the ring back over my finger and placed it on the other hand.
“We don’t want to give people the wrong impression!”
I swallowed hard against his dejected expression, hiding my face against his chest, I struggled to fight back the tears. He hugged me tight into him, I could feel his heart beating hard against my ear. His lips rested down on my head.
“So, what did you get for me ?”
I could hear the saddened tone behind the forced excitement.
“Oh erm, I’ll go and get it.”
I swung my legs off the bed, my steps agitated as I made my way to the opposite end of the room. His gift lay waiting at the top of my backpack.
“Here,” I said. I winced a smile
“Thanks Babe!” He looked genuinely pleased.
I felt genuinely ashamed. After all the effort he’d put into my gift, all the thought. Handing him a ‘be my Valentine card’ with a simple to and from, and a bottle of Dolce and Gabbana ‘The one.’ Didn’t quite warrant the appreciation he was showing.
“I’m sorry, I, I didn’t really know what to get you.”
“Hey ‘The One’ I’m happy with that!”
I’ll get you something else to go with it. Maybe we can go out together and you can choose for yourself ?”
I looked down at the chunk of Diamond glistening from my finger.
“Angel, seriously, it’s more then enough!”
He opened it up and splashed it over his chin.
“Do you like it ?” My expression froze in anticipation
“You’ve got a good sense of smell Baby, I love it!”
My doubt washed over with a sigh of relief. I hadn’t even smelt it, buying it solely for the name.
“So now I smell fucking gorgeous, fancy getting down and dirty with me ?”
I laughed as he pinned me down on my back.
“I er, I brought you a little something else.”
“Ethan, no!” I lifted my finger, staring still in shock at my ring.
“Babe, it’s nothing major. It was more of a just in case.”
“Just in case ?” I rose my brow quizzically.
“Yeah!” He paused, rolling his body to my side.
“Just in case you erm, still don’t feel ready ?” His own brow rose in hope I might say I was.
“I would like to wait a little longer if that’s ok.”
“Of course it is Angel, it’s your call!” He looked disappointed ..
Fu*k! I was disappointed and it was my own decision. I wanted him inside me so bad, but I wanted it to be special.
The day we finally exchanged those words, how we would embrace each other so passionately, our hearts melting into one , our bodies connecting together, ripping at each other’s clothes. We would make love for hours on end, the two of us connecting in the most intimate way known to man. Damn, that was a constant fantasy of mine, one I aimed one day to make real.
“What is it then ?” My curiosity getting the better of me.
“I’ll get it in a bit, let’s get a bit more comfortable first.”
He stood up, unbuttoning his shirt he let it fall to the ground. My eyes gazed pleasingly across his Ab’s.
“Stand up Angel, I’ll unzip you!”
I stood in front of him, he lowered the silver zip at the back of my sky blue A line dress. Pushing it over my shoulders, his fingers skimmed over my naked breasts, my nipples hardened in response. The dress dropped to a heap at my feet, I stepped over the material, kicking it to the side. His lips trailed across my back, I could feel his arousal pulsating in the small of my back.
My head tilted back into the crook of his neck. One hand was teasing my nipple, the over, caressing the satin material between my legs. His mouth driving me mad with desire.
“You make me so fu*king hard Baby and your so God damn wet...You have no idea how much I wanna fu*k you for real, but I’ve got you a little something to give you an idea of what it’s gonna feel like when I do!”
Jesus, the words he was breathing heavily into my ear.
“I am gonna fu*k you eventually, you know that don’t you! I know you want me to Angel, and pretty soon your gonna let me!”
Fu*k, I was ready to cum, my body pushing down onto his fingers,my groans jaggered as they left my mouth.
“Bend over for me Baby.”
He pushed on my back, my hands shot out in front of me, landing on the mattress I rested on my elbows. He pushed my feet apart, his fingers still pushing deep inside.
“Oh god, yes, that’s so good!” His tongue flicked greedily over my wetness.
“I assume your not on the pill Angel ?”
“Yeah I am,” my reply juddered. He stopped all movement.
“Ethan, I went on it for my periods, but I told you not yet.”
His finger continued pumping, his tongue moved fast over my clit.
“Ahh, oh , oh god, yes, oh yes stay there, oh god yes, that’s it, oh fu*k, Ethan....′ His name spilled through my lips, my orgasm spilled into his. My head sunk into the mattress, I felt him lean across me, the next minute I was Laid flat on my back facing up at him.
“Do you want me to..” My eyes glanced to his erection.
“No not yet!” He declined. “I’ve not finished with you!”
“But I just did.”
“And your about to again I told you, I’ve got you a little something! Get up on your hands and knees Baby!”
I rolled onto my front, lifting myself on all fours. He knelt behind me.
“Ethan!” I panicked, my body tensing up.
“Relax, it’s not going in!” His hand was moving up and down his shaft, it’s head was rubbing through the wetness, caressing my clit.
Oh fu*k, it felt so good, my arousal was building back up fast. Every now and again I could feel it pushing very lightly against my opening, the temptation to thrust my self back, forcing its entry was getting ridiculously hard to resist, I could only imagine how much control he was having to contend with at that point.
“Fu*k NO!” Ethan...” My refusal leaving along with a elongated pleasurable groan
“It’s your gift, don’t panic!” I heard him chuckle.
“Jesus Christ Ethan, I thought it was your ...”
“Yeah, I wished it was!”
He pushed the life like vibrator, as I assumed it was at that time, slowly and deeper into my sex. Fu*k, I felt like I was ripping apart. It stung like mad, but felt so damn good, i allowed him to continue.
“Is it hurting Angel ?” His tone concerned.
“A little.” I admitted.
“Do you want me to stop ?” His hand halted as he spoke
“No, I like it, and it’s getting easier.”
“Lay on your back Angel.”
He pulled it out, urging me to sit slightly up against the pillows.
“That’s it, now open your legs real wide!” His tongue rolled over his lips as I parted my legs.
“Ok, now you do it, it won’t feel so intense!” He offered me the life like cock shaped sex toy.
“It’s got two heads, Ethan, you brought me a double ended dildo!” My jaw dropped as I excepted it in my hand.
“It’s fu*king huge!”
Well, you know, I thought it might come in handy!”
He winked his eye at me, a devious grin on his face . I lined it up to my opening, sliding it back inside.
“Damn, that’s horny!” He laid there watching me ease it further in.
“Can I feel your other hole ?”
“God NO! I shot him a disgusted glare.
“Your mouth Angel!” He laughed hysterically, shifting towards me on his knees.
“Oh!” I giggled back. Taking him in my mouth, I matched the rhythm down below.
God I was feeling even more impatient to experience the real thing now. My body felt totally stuffed both ends, and it felt so hot.
“Damn girl I can hear how fu*king wet you are!” Ethan’s rasped words speed up my rhythm.
“I think I’m gonna cum again Ethan, fu*k I am. My words incoherent, escaping from a mumble around his length. He grunted back at me, I watched his face tense up.
“Oh fu*k, so hot Angel, so fu*king hot.. His co*k juddered in my mouth, his arousal filling me full, seeping down the back of my throat. I groaned with pleasure, my hips rising up from the bed, my hand vigorously Pushing one end of the dildo inside my opening. My orgasm juddered it’s way through me, my free hand pulling Ethan down to me.
“You have got the sexiest cum face I’ve ever witnessed Angel!”
I kissed him, remnants of his own arousal still in my mouth. He pulled back, a look of distaste over his face.
“I’m getting down and dirty with you Ethan, so get down and dirty with me!”
He lowered his head with hesitance, before placing his lips back over mine.
“Ok, that was fu*ked up kinky!”
“That was damn fu*ked up hot!” I told him . My tongue trailed down past his navel back to his co*k.
Thank you for reading -x