|New town, new life|
"Mom, the sun has not risen yet ," I groaned waking up.
"Yes honey we will leave now, now come get dressed quickly and come down, Dylan and Nina are waiting for you," my mom said and quicky left the room.
I was a girl with big dreams , you know I was born for big cities and big things , but I never was thinking that this will change .
Moving from Boston to a small town in Canada destroyed all my biggest dreams . For me it was like I was born for the second time. I was leaving my friends, my family, my school, my home and to many other things that I love to do. I prayed to my parents, to let me to stay to aunt Molly but nothing will change their minds.
We are leaving today , I greeted with everyone but the most difficult thing is to say goodbye to Nina and Dylan, they are my best friends from kindergarten, and they have a very important place in my heart. Just that Dylan is and my boyfriend. But we decided to break up and stay friends just because I didn't think that long distance relationship would work. He was so okay with it and I am glad about it.
Then I quickly got dressed because I wanted to stay if is possible just for a few more seconds with them . When I went down Dylan and Nina where there standing, waiting for me, and in their faces was sadness.
"Morning Hanna-Boo," Nina said with a sad smile in her face .
"Please don't call me that , or I'm gonna start crying," I said and then threw myself into her arms. And now both of us were crying . After a few minutes I shuddered from the hug and she said, "promise me that you will text or call me whenever you have time , of course I will text and call to you too."
And I just nodded and trying to wipe away the tears. Then my eyes went to Dylan , now he was crying too. I was looking deep into those bright brown eyes which were fielded with so much pain , but he tried to hide it with a small smile which it warmed my heart . But I know him so damn much for him to hide something from me . I smiled back at him and we kept looking at each other until someone spoke.
"Well, I'm gonna leave you two alone now," Nina said and quickly got out of the house, when I made sure she was out and we were left alone I quickly threw myself into his arms and couldn't breathe from the tears , than Dylan pulled me away his warm hands still on my cheeks that now they were red from crying and he was looking every detail of my face .
"My first love, my first kiss, my princess, my happines shhh... Hannah please don't cry , it's gonna be okay you will never know. Don't
worry to much, they will like you , you are the best and the kindest person I ever know it in my entire life. You never know life maybe when you go there will be better, new place, new friends , a new person, a new life ... a new lover that you will probably love more than me." He said still looking me in the eyes, and then I punched his arm in a playful way.
I threw myself into his arms again and after a few seconds I said, "You know I will never find someone like you, and I will never love someone as much as I love you.''
"Yes, yes we know," he said in a sarcastic tone, and now I was laughing.
"That is the sound that I wanna hear it , so now come on you are a strong girl." He comforted me rubbing my back.
We stayed in silence hugging each other and he kissing my head so many times for a long time but then dad came in and we both jumped.
"Hannah it's time to go," dad said then Dylan sent me a look and I nodded and then he left us alone.
Looking around for a few minutes in silence I broke the silence, "Here was my childhood, the place where I took my first steps, the place where I learned to hold the pencil, the place where I learned to love and respect, here it all closes memories, but at least they will remain good memories," and now tears were flowing down my face.
"Hey Hannah please don't cry," dad said stepping a step forward me .
"How not to cry dad, I'm leaving the most favorite place on the globe, I'm leaving half my soul." I cried even more .
"Please do not cry honey," he said and pulled me to his chest. After I calmed down together with my father, we went out, said goodbye to everyone once again and left.
The flight was not that long, but the road from the airport to our new house was long . No matter how hard mom tried to fix our mood, nothing worked, nothing could break us that ice of boredom.
Overthinking and sometimes even crying I fell asleep, until I heard someone.
"Hannah, Hannah , miss Hannah wake up ," someone said shaking me .
"Huh, what happend?" I asked ,now I was awake.
"We arrived Hannah, do you want to come in," Lucas answered rolling his eyes.
"Really, what time is it?" I questioned him .
"Umm," Lucas said opening his phone, "it's 12:34 ."
"Oh," is all what I said than I get inside. Mom and dad already got in the house. They are gonna to sleep because they're tiered from the ride , the house was furnished, and all what was missing was our personal things.
I tried to get sleep but no sleep came to my eyes , I watched to the clock it was 2:16 in the morning. After a few minutes of trying to get sleep , sleep wasn't going to come, so I get up and went downstairs.And since I didn't have what to fucking do because the internet connection wasn't working yet I decided to take a tour around the house.
First of all, I went out to see the garden , it wasn't too bad and the neighborhood was so quite.
There were some stairs to help you to get to the door, to the right was a veranda with several seats and a table in the middle, a nice place to read. I started there for a few seconds enjoying the view, but then I got again back inside because it was cold.
When I went back inside, right next to the door on the left were the stairs then there was a corridor not so long then it was the kitchen and then it was divided into two rooms where one leads to the dining room and the other to the living room, and if I forgot to point out that there was a bathroom near the stairs. The furniture was not that bad , they weren't from the old house they were all brand new, they were modern.
And now it's the second floor right next to the stairs to the left was my room in front of the time it belonged to mom and dad, to the right of my room was Lucas's room, and opposite Lucas's room was dad's office.
My room it's not like that had to many thing , I just have my bad my desk for work ,my large bookshelf,my spot where I read , my skateboard collection and of course my bathroom.
I laid again on the bed and sighed, why do I have such a fucked up life?
It was so hard to make a best friend and a boyfriend for me and now again I have nothing, why always these things come and find me .
People always didn't want me, and there weren't even a reason.
My family died in a car accident, I had two big brothers, one was eighteen and the other was thirteen. And of course my mom and my dad. I was six then.
I don't remember so good the car crash, ether my family, but the police managed to find my house, to get me some of my personal stuff and from them I got three photos where we were all together.
I saying that I was smart but not smart enough for the things that the kids in my orphanage did to me.
I lost two of my three photos it left just one , we were at my house I think close to the Christmas tree . We really looked happy.
At least I remembered my family's names, my eldest brother he was named Atlas, such a wonderful name. He was my favourite, he was very protective and always had my side.
Then was my lovely mom , she was the not the kindest person but I now that she loved me, she worked really hard, she was a fashion designer. She every time tried to find time for us.
Than there was my dad the most perfect person in the whole world, he always tried to make us happy, in all fucking ways. Even if we were in to our lowest . He always reminded me that mom always loves me, even if I didn't believed him. But after all these years I realize that she really loved us.
And in the end the rebel child, Liam, he was the rebel teenager, he always made quarrel and leave it to me. But in the end of the day he was always the brother who came and slept with me when I was afraid. He told me fairy tales and told me about how schools goes and how wonderful is being a teenager. He never talked to anyone expect me. I mean about his school life. He told me about this girl who he had a crush , I even remember her name it was Gabriella.
I cry every single time I remember them, I miss them so damn much . Why I couldn't just go with them and live peacefully together in peace.
I was raised in orphanage. The kids there never liked me. No fucking one likes to play with me, they just forced me to do the things they had to do by promising to become my friends and after I finished things they left me alone. I was fucking seven , and I never got revenge to them.
They were bigger , and they were there for a longer time. They always acted innocent when the teachers were there. Fucking manipulative kids.
The boys they pushed me, they hit me when we were alone, I always tried to push them away but no, nothing halped. They made me fucking regret the I was born and the biggest shit was that they even sexually harassed me .
And the worst was that no fucking even noticed. In the first I didn't know what did that mean, y'know I thought that they just hurting me. I fucking was seven, seven you motherfuckers. When I found out what they did to me I was terrified.
And now I have trauma.
They destroyed my childhood, my life and an innocent child.
Fucking don't trust anybody besides my family, Nina and Dylan. One thing is that I will never forgive them burn in hell sons of whores.
When I turned eight finally a family was interested to find a little girl , and they found me. To tell you right Sebastian, my older found me, he was looking for the toilet he was eleven in that time. I was getting out of the girls toilet and he bumped in to me . After that he told his parents and now my parents and here I am.
So the new starts are not my thing , always they were terrible for me .
God please help me.