Chapter 21: Need
I stared at my notebook blankly. I ripped it off as soon as I finished composing the first verse.
Something doesn’t feel right. I can compose songs before. They were all fine whenever I try to put it up with some tune and sing it but now, it’s been weeks since Zaron challenged me to write an original composition and I haven’t gone back to him yet.
Where is he, by the way?
Their band’s name trended on Twitter when they disbanded. Kit left the country already and the other members Nico and Eli were to focus on their studies. What’s his plan? The article never mentioned his name.
“Are you done with the activity, Jael? I need to pass it now to the faculty,” one of my classmates went to me, asking for my paper.
I pulled it from my folder and gave it to him. He crouched to pick up the crumpled papers on the floor.
“Are these yours?” He tried to open it but I stopped him immediately.
“Those were nothing!”
He looked at me with his forehead creased. Probably, shocked because of my sudden response.
“Uhm... those are personal. Sorry...”
He gave every crumpled paper scattered on the floor to me. When he left, I put it all inside my bag so no one else can see or read it.
I should not do this here in school. But where else can I do this? I’ve got a lot of homework piled up. I do not want to do this in the hospital either because I will just be sad whenever I will look at my parents. They haven’t regained consciousness yet. No progress, still.
The hours I spent in school passed by like wind maybe because I have no friends yet. The classmates that I have right now were all unfamiliar to me. They came from different sections and they’re in groups while I’m the only one who came from our section. Our names got shuffled and I just got unlucky.
Good thing Zaron made me want to do this or else I’ll be busy staring at my classmates while they bond with each other and I’ve got no one but myself.
We received an announcement that all senior high school students shall go to the auditorium for the picking of clubs. Should I go? Last year, I didn’t join any because I was not interested and I promised myself that I’ll focus on my academics instead.
I still don’t think I have time for it.
We were dismissed early for today. Hana called and asked me if I’m free because she would like to go to the mall to buy a new book.
She’s finished with the last book she’s reading? Already?
I’ll wait for you at the cafeteria.
I bid goodbye to my classmates and proceed to the cafeteria. I pulled out my notebook and pen again. I need to compose a song or else I won’t get to join Zaron’s band.
But what will I write about?
I need something inspiring. Something relatable. Something that will make his heart flutter. Or can someone or something make his heart flutter? He looks cold and acts cold, too all the time.
I looked at the students passing by. When I shifted my gaze I saw a couple sitting together at a table near me and doing their homework together. They look so sweet.
It would be nice to have someone when you’re feeling stressed. But it’s hard to enter a relationship, too when you’re young.
“What’s that?” Hana sat at the table.
I made a face at her to show how frustrated I am with this.
“You’re writing a song? Is this for your channel?” She asked as she keeps reading them.
Those were all just verses. I cannot proceed to the chorus. I do not even know what to write.
“Jael... I think... you’re having a hard time because you don’t know yet what you want to write about,” she said.
“Exactly!” I agreed.
“You should focus on the topic first. Do you still want to come with me or should I let you finish this?”
I started putting everything inside my bag.
“It’s fine. I guess I have to forget this for a while so I can start afresh.”
“Okay. I’ll just buy water. Wait here.”
Hana left me while I was compiling the pieces of paper scattered on the table. She went to the nearest stall to buy water but there are a lot of students in the line so it will take her some time.
I leaned against the backrest of my chair and firmly closed my eyes. Even my eyes hurt. When I opened it, I saw a familiar guy standing across from me.
He started walking towards me and everything just went slow motion. He’s wearing the same uniform college students here wear but I’m not sure what specific course he’s in.
I stood up when he’s already in front of me, still shock by his presence.
“W-what are you doing here? You’re enrolled here?”
He gave me a poker face.
“Isn’t it obvious?” He asked me back.
I rolled my eyes. Here he goes again with his sarcastic response.
“I-i mean... never mind!”
His eyes looked down on my papers. I immediately covered it with my hands but he managed to get at least one.
He lifted it as high as he could. He’s so tall that I can’t reach it even though I am tiptoeing already.
“You haven’t finished anything yet?” He gave it back to me after he read it in a swift.
I snapped at him.
“It’s not easy to compose a song, okay? I don’t have any... inspiration right now so I don’t know what to write about. Why are you here anyway?”
I moved a little farther from him because I closed the distance when he grabbed one of my drafts.
“I’m waiting for Nico and Eli-”
“They study here, too?”
Woah. Maybe I am destined to join their band?
“This is the nearest school from our apartment-”
“Where’s your apartment?” I asked.
His eyes squinted. “Why are you asking?”
“I should know! Will we practice thereafter I successfully joined your band and-”
“You’re not a member yet,” he cut me off.
I hung my backpack on my shoulder.
“I will soon,” I assured him.
Maybe I could get a little information about Lucille de Silva when I have access to his place. They might not live together but I’m sure there will be pictures and small details.
I didn’t notice Hana was already at the corner, watching us bicker with two water bottles in her hands.
“You’re done? Let’s go?” I asked her.
Her eyes were stuck to Zaron. It’s like she’s observing him. Zaron did nothing but stand where he was.
“We need to go. I’ll find you once I’m done with the composition. I’ll prove you wrong so just give me some time-”
“I don’t like waiting.”
I looked at him with an irritated expression. This guy always wants things fast-paced. What am I? Taylor Swift?
“If you wanted me to help you meet me here on Friday. Same time.”
And then he left without looking back.
I was a bit shocked but ignored him and went to Hana.
He will help me? No, thanks. I bet we’ll just fight and we won’t finish anything.
But I need help.
“That’s Zaron Samaniego?”
I nodded and opened the water she bought for me.
“He seemed fine... and manly. You like him?”
I clung to her arm and led the way so we could go to the mall.
“I don’t but I need him.”