Feeling Mouse’s utter dread in leaving her house, her sanctuary, her castle, Cathenne helped her step out of the building onto the front porch, encouraging, “Focus on me, just me. Look at me! I wear your clothing, your latex under my smooth tight leather coverall. I do like how your beautiful long brown latex coat with a hood falls around my legs. I laced the leather aviator you gave me to wear as tightly as I felt you liked it. Under the latex coat’s hood is my red ponytail sticking out through the latex hood, then the leather aviator. Yes, yes, I feel your pleasure thinking about it all. Now focus on my excitement perving at you and put one long slender latex-covered leg before the other.
When you walk on your heelless toe boots with those sad large brown eyes, you remind me of a doe prancing through the forest. The cute girly latex skirt you wear at my request excites me and makes me want you even though your latex coat covers it. The length of your exposed legs as you step down the stair, another, another, and a fifth, makes me imagine that my lags in your toe boots excite you in the same way, and this excites me even more.
I love your wide brown expressive eyes, framed so nicely by your black latex aviator under your pink latex coat hood. Your slender neck is just to die for; step around the corner; and frankly, I like your mouth too, so small and elegant compared to my colossal mouth and fat lips.”
It was working well, but Cathenne could not be walking backward, leading an invisible person by the hands all the way to the shops, so she tried another tack, “Tell me why everything seems centered around your latex clothing and the safe room.” Cathenne stepped beside Mouse, took her hand, and put both into her coat’s pocket, almost walking as normal as she could with a ghost on her arms.
Mouse answered, “When he started hitting me, the pain was so bad, so bad that I wanted to scream, but I did not want to give him the satisfaction. I imagined my largest, most impossible latex gag in my mouth and remained silent, waiting to pass out. This got him even more enraged. He kept on dousing me with water to shock me awake, so I imagined myself in many layers of latex. When he attended the other girl, all I could do is imagine myself away from the pain and horror in my safe room, at home, bundled into latex.”
“Sorry, Mouse,” apologized Cathenne, “I was trying to distract you, not make you relive the pain.”
Mouse wanted to speak about it, so she just continued, “It was always my greatest fear, to be at the mercy of another. But even worse for me is thinking that this man, this thing, could put something into my body from which a child would grow, a being that would remind me every waking moment of my rape. I think that is what happened to my mum and me, and I would not wish that on any child.”
Trying to move away from that to something positive, Cathenne asked, “How did you come to latex. I mean, did you know someone who wore it, or how were you introduced to it?” The feeling from Mouse changed drastically from loathing and fear to shame.
Cathenne tried to correct it, but Mouse was already speaking, “I was a bed wetter for as long as I can remember. Mum always had me in diapers and plastic underwear. I used to hate the feel of plastic against my skin, and it caused a rash. I still had the problem with bedwetting when I left home, so I tried latex underwear.
A few months in, I stopped bedwetting, but I liked latex. At first, it was just the underwear, but then came Aruna’s book. From then on, I only brought my clothing online from Blackstyle and Fantastic Rubber. The last are the ones that make the neck-entry only suits which are my favorite. When the money started coming in from the books, my needs were few, so I kept buying latex and wearing it under my normal clothing. Slowly, latex became normal and normal became uncomfortable.”
Cathenne encouraged, “And the heelless toe boots?”
The exciting feeling from Mouse jumped as she exclaimed, “I looked at a pair of ankle-toe pumps for a year before I finally got the courage to buy them. I did not like the ones with the thick souls or the hoof ones, but I just loved my pink and blacks. I was so excited when they arrived, afraid that they would be the wrong size or I could not wear them, that I wore them to bed.
As I was an editor and spent most of the time before a PC, I could rest between walks. So, I kept wearing them and practiced taking short walks whenever my feet did not hurt. It took me a long time before I went shopping with them. I celebrated that day, and now I can’t wear any other. Well, I am dead, so that’s not a problem, and I like the look. What about you Cathenne, when did you learn to wear ballet boots?”
Cathenne recalled, “You know, I did like ballet. But my parent’s incessant pushing to be better and then my teacher encouraging my parent’s driven ways added to the pressure. Then Dame Rhonda forced me to be the prima ballerina in Swan Lake. Her constant pushing and nagging added to my parent’s guilt-tripping me to dance to exhaustion. Just finish what you started, just one more try out to see how far you could go. Just dance the lead in Swan Lake, as you will never have an opportunity like that again. That last performance pressure broke this camel’s back. I turned to revenge and made a plan.
I decided that I would dance the lead in Swan Lake, so I worked hard. It was grueling, painful, unsatisfactory, aside from the usual blisters and calluses. I have to wear boots all the time because of stress fractures and multiple ankle sprains. But I worked through all this and was ready for opening night. I danced so well that I had five encores. By the sixth encore, I was gone, run away from home, from school, from everything. I stole all the money I could find and some jewelry and left a hateful note to my parents.”
Mouse smiled and spoke, “I know you are distracting me, Cathenne, and I am learning to trust you. But, I did not sense that you are uncomfortable walking in the boots. If it reminds you of this painful time, I will not ask you to wear them again. But your trick worked, and we are halfway to the shops, and I am still here.”
Feeling Mouse holding her hand, Cathenne confirmed, “Yes, we are. I feel you, I hear you in my mind, I think, but you are invisible. Aside, Mouse. I feel your admiration for my efforts, and frankly, it is more than I ever got from my parents. It was a constant pressure to excel, be the best, then a short overbearing celebration when I achieved something, and then the pressure resumed for the next important, special thing. With you, by wearing what you like, the latex, ballet boots, everything, I do not feel pressured but appreciated and almost all the time. Mother and father should have tried that instead, and now, sensing your feelings about me and what I wear, how can I not love it.”
Mouse blushed, leaned on Cathenne but then asked, “Oh, what about me in my latex dress and all, here in public. I did not think to put on a coat!”
Cathenne revealed, “Just a few yards from the property, you disappeared. But I hear you, and I feel your warm hand in mine, so I think you are officially my private and personal haunting. I do like imagining you in the lovely yellow latex ruffle dress over your brown gloved catsuit. Do you have some matching items, like gloves, hood, and perhaps boots?”
Sensing and sounding elated, Mouse confirmed, “Really? You really would like me to dress in a certain way? Really? Oh, I sense that you do. Oh, is that desire and lust? Oh, Cathenne. But, I am a ghost!”
Cathenne mused, “Yes, there is that, but first shopping, then plotting, then we will see...”
Back at home, eating an eye-filet steak, perfectly done, chat potatoes, three-beans, and spinach with bacon, Cathenne complimented, “If we ever have to make money, we can open a restaurant in the house. Where did you learn to cook like this?”
Tasting the food through Cathenne, Mouse answered, “I am not sure I had all the ingredients right. Oh, but then I have to account for your different taste buds. Do I have it right that you might like your food a bit spicier?”
Cathenne confirmed, “When I studied design and architecture, I shared a room with two other girls. We all worked a lot and hardly ever were there at the same time. Anyway, I could not cook, and there was an all-you-can-eat-rice Chinese restaurant. So I ordered a standard meal, making it last over several rice bowls. I flavored the rice with Sambal Oelek and usually went through a whole pot in a sitting. If I could, I would only eat rice with Sambal Oelek, and yes, it is spicy. What about you, Mouse? How did you learn to cook so well?”
Mouse answered, “Cooking shows...”
A while later, sated and on the warm side still in her leather coverall, catsuit, and aviator, they lay in bed watching Wonder Woman, 1984, on Mouse’s super-large screen TV. Mouse wore yellow elbow-length latex gloves, matching hood, but she did not have matching ballet boots. Snuggling into her, not really watching the movie, Cathenne felt Mouse’s peace and happiness.
Cathenne watched the movie too, but her mind raced, thinking about Mouse’s predicament. Perhaps it was better not to do anything and just leave things as they are. She was falling for Mouse and even enjoyed the overpacking, latex, and toe boots that Mouse liked to make her wear. But would Mouse’s personality eventually disappear? Cathenne was prepared to have Mouse with her, but what if that is not enough.
All that she knew of ghosts was speculative, but most agreed. Becoming a ghost either meant a punishment, a traumatic event, or a curse. No matter which, they needed to achieve something for the spirit to find peace, make up for something, or resolve an issue. But was Cathenne prepared to lose Mouse? As much as she could tell, she loved the little sprite nestled on her bosom. But then, if it was love what she felt, she would do what is best for Mouse.
“What are you thinking, Cathenne?”
Cathenne did not want to share her concerns for Mouse. Instead, she drew Mouse in and kissed her on her yellow latex-covered forehead. Mouse sighed, and they watched the movie together...