How do I always manage to fuck things up with Victoria? Every word from her mouth made sense, then how come I didn’t realise it? Was I that ignorant?
She sobbed and I hurt, I physically hurt looking at her so distraught.
I tried touching her but she wouldn’t let me.
My fist clenched.
“Tell me how to make it better Ria” I rasped.
She looked up at me, and I was afraid of what she’d say. Because for the first time she looked ready to give up, as if there was no hope left.
“Nothing, there’s absolutely nothing that you can do except leave me alone” she said defeated.
I shook my head and held her tight even when she tried pushing me away.
“Jacob LET GO! Don’t touch me with her on your lips” she pushed me away disgustingly.
I suddenly realised her aversion to me. I was afraid she’d lock her room again if I left so I took out a towel from her wardrobe and went into her washroom to get a bath, she looked at me confused.
“I’ll get a bath and then we’ll talk. You’re right, I need to wash her off me.”
She looked away but kept quiet.
I locked the chambers and then went into the washroom to get a shower. I came out with a towel wrapped around me and changed into the extra clothes that I had in Victoria’s room fortunately.
I walked to her, grazing my fingers on Ria’s shoulder and thanked the lord when she didn’t push me away.
“Were you ever in love with her Jacob?” I heard her quietly ask.
“No, love. It’s only ever been you.” I rasped.
I closed my eyes when she remained silent, she never called me Jacob anymore and I hated that now she wouldn’t call me Jake. I knew Victoria thought I had let Isabella call me Jake, when in fact I was so tensed that I barely heard any conversation. Even when she reached into my room I was trying to get her to leave so that I could come to Victoria, I barely listened to what she was trying to say. If I had payed a little attention and noticed that she was calling me Jake, I would’ve put her in her place and told her to call me Prince Jacob.
My jaw clenched, I could not imagine what I would do if a man called Victoria, Ria. She was absolutely right, these special names were ours, nobody else’s.
I never even thought of her as my friend, we spent a little time when we were kids that too only because her brother is a nice man, and as kids we were close. Isabella to me always had been Rose’s friend. Once when she kissed me, we were little, I had no idea and just went along with it, never have I thought of her in a romantic way. I’ve never loved anyone, but Ria. She has been my exception, I never even thought I ’d find a woman I could love, what I had for Ria.. the word love did not do justice for my feelings. I loved her with my should, I’d do anything for her, be anything.
My eyes snapped to her as she said,
“That’s not true, see I can say that because you have been my one and only. I don’t know what all.. activities you’ve performed with the other girls. Unfortunately I know one of them now. If we get married I’ll not only have to meet her but be civil with her and chat with her as well. You don’t have to worry about that, because for me it’s only ever been you.”
My heart dropped when she said if and not when we get married. I won’t let her leave me because of fucking Isabella.
I won’t lose Victoria. Not now, not ever.