Up until the age of 12 I looked like a boy. My mum cut my hair really short and I hadn’t discovered make up. I was in the first year of high school and we were on an outdoor education trip, lined up waiting to be shown which dorm we would be staying on. Suddenly a teacher started screaming at me “get over there with the rest of the boys!” I was devastated. From that day on I grew my hair and began to wear make up. I wrote on my pencil case I LOVE DAVE ALLEN.
I must have started to look more feminine, as Dave eventually asked me to be his girlfriend. He walked me home from school and kissed me at the bottom of the steps outside my house. My first kiss. My first boyfriend. We were together about a year. He took me to the cinema to watch ghostbusters with his friends, he bought me a little bottle of perfume. I loved him and I think he loved me. At school he used to flirt with me and take the little pegs off my bag and run off. In reaction one day I gripped him by the jumper round his neck and the whole thing just ripped down the front. I had a letter sent home by school asking my parents to buy a new one, as he was from a single parent family.
We used to goto a disco on a Friday night at the local pub, in a kind of barn outside. I met Dave there one Friday, he was with my mates and he was with his. I bought a new outfit to go, a pin striped skirt and a white shirt, so 80s. We all had our hair swept to the side with a whole tin of hair spray holding it in place. He lent me his Nike red and blue Jacket and I felt amazing. They had little TVs on the wall by the DJ and they were playing GIRLS ON FILM by Duran Duran. I could see my older cousin Melissa dancing at the front, I gave her a wave.
It was about 9:30pm. And Dave came upto me asking if I wanted to go “under the bridge” I froze. I knew older kids went under there to have sex. I was 12 ffs. On top of that I was on my period so double no thanks. I made an excuse not to go and my mum picked me up soon after.
The relationship kind of dwindled after that, I can’t remember much about it. Dave and his friends began to call me Zanusi , a make of fridge, as in frigid after that and it finally ended when he danced to careless whisper at the school disco with some ugly girl from the year above us.
I gave up, she was welcome to him.
So that was my first love. A few years later he got engaged to my cousin Melissa and moved to London. They weee together for years. He cheated on her with a nurse for years. Was the best man at her dads wedding then dropped her like a stone. He went into cheat on his wife and drink a lot of alcohol. Dodge the bullet.