We all had new identities and new jobs. I kept my first name, which I considered to be a risk. However my last name is the real knocker.
My original name is Avanelle Day, but I now go by Avanelle Knight.
I jumped slightly as I hear my name being called.
"Yes?" I answered, without turning to look at them.
Before, their voice would offer a feeling of warmth.
Now all I get is a bad taste in my mouth.
"Are you ready to talk about this?" He asked pleading.
I pondered over his words and I considered them for a fraction of a second.
"I have nothing to say." I replied abruptly. With that, I took a stand from the seat by the window, and looked at him from across our bedroom.
He had the same puppy dog eyes I would get annoyed about because I thought they were too pure.
I was always scared of having my heart broken. I had my guard up for a long time after Jason, and then I met Zane.
I let down my walls in my own belief that he would never hurt me.
It's more hurtful to know that it was me who who broke my own heart. Not him.
"You can't avoid me forever." He stared at me coldly.
I gulped with guilt but kept my emotions hidden. I shook my head slightly at him, then rolled my eyes.
"I'm not avoiding you. I'm avoiding the conversation you desperately want to have."
He folded his arms as he blocks the door. "It's been a week since it happened."
I mimicked his actions by folding my own arms.
"I just don't know what you want me to say."
"Avanelle just tell me why," he demanded.
"Why what Zane?" I matched his tone.
"Can you stop taking me for an idiot and tell me why you had sex with him!"
"How did you–"
"How did I know?" He chuckled mockingly. "You told me you only kissed him but you did more than that. Didn't you?"
I stared at him with my eyes wide in disbelief.
"No one told me but I knew. Your attitude changed ever since. I could tell you were lying the second you told me too but I wanted to trust you. Your face right now is telling me everything I need to know." He closed the gap between us. I remained frozen.
"I trusted you Ava. You told me you were ready to commit to me and this relationship. Now I don't think I can trust you ever again. It's best we break up so that you can figure out who you want to be with. I'm tired of playing your little game."
My eyes stung has I tried to suppress my emotions.
"I can't believe you can stare at me with absolutely no emotion," his eyes stared pleading at mines. "You truly are damaged."
After those words I blacked out for the remainder of the conversation. He could've left me standing there for hours but time was irrelevant to me. Time only reminded me of all that I have been through. All the people I have killed. The heartbreak. I tried to push the trauma of working at the agency away but it's still with me.
I have been living here for 6 months and three days and I still feel as if I am being watched.
Every waking day I am filled with paranoia knowing that the Boss is looking for me. He has only one intention when he finds all of us and that is to finish what he started.
I walked straight up to the familiar door and knocked hard on it twice. I knew I shouldn't feed my anger but man it is boiling and if I don't let it out, I am going to fucking explode.
I knocked hard again and the door open swiftly. Jax stood there looking equally pissed but probably for a different reason since he was knee deep in my girlfriend's pussy a week ago.
I threw a quick right hook punch on his left cheek and threw another by the crook of his nose.
"That's for fucking Ava."
He stared at me in disbelief as he held his broken nose. I know he is more built to fight me since he was an assassin, but I know a few things.
I hiss my teeth and left his house still feeling pissed off. Quickly, I made a turn towards the gym. Hitting on a few body bags sounds like it for me.
Since being in New York, it was a pain finding a gym that wasn't packed all the damn time. But I came upon one that wasn't. I went in and head straight for the bags.
Not looking where I was going, I kicked a water bottle that was on the floor next to a gym bag.
I heard a gasp from a woman behind me. I turned to see the woman who I have always seen hitting the body bags around the same time I do.
I would always see her by coincidence.
A bit weird but eh!
"Oh, I'm sorry about that. I'll get you another," I apologized sincerely.
She chuckled a bit then gave a flirty smile.
"I'm Lola," she says lowly with an outstretched hand.
Without thinking rationally, somehow, we ended up in a cubicle in the women's bathroom.
I traced my hands all over body as I kissed her aggressively. In a way I have never kissed Ava.
At the thought of her name, I pushed the girl on the wall so her chest was pressing against it. I removed her bottoms and a smell of strawberry filled my nostrils. I pressed my nostrils against her warm wet folds and then licked across her small sensitive bud.
She gasps and moans slightly, then grabs my head as she encourages me to continue. I grab her hand and placed both of them above her head.
I pushed my hood deep inside her all at once. With each stroke, I became even more aggressive. She was unable to control her screams, so I covered her mouth with my hand and continued.
"Is this what you like?" I moaned in her ear angrily. "Tell me Ava. Do you like to be fucked rough like this?"
"I don't care if you forgot my name. Just shut up and fuck me," the woman groaned.
I stopped myself and took a step back.
Shaking my head profusely, I apologized briefly and told her to leave. She quickly got dressed and murmured,
"This wasn't fun."
If things weren't bad between Ava and I, it sure as hell is now.
I mean I did break up with her because she had sex with Jax. I shouldn't feel guilty for what I just did but I do. Hooking up with a random girl an hour after our breakup. Not very classic Zane.
But a part of me doesn't want to care anymore.
I'm tired of putting my heart on the line and giving a woman everything and she cheats and lie and hide things from me. For once, I wanted a healthy relationship. A marriage. A family.
That's what I wanted.
It's all in the past now.
I sat on the floor next to my bed thinking through the past few months.
Jax and I took a job working as a cop. It was pretty decent I guess. Okay let's just say it's a lot easier than being an assassin.
One major advantage is that I don't have to kill. I can disable and disarm. Which I am excellent at.
Zane took a job at a clinic working as one of their doctors. Nothing has really changed for him except the scenery.
He tends to work long hours and my shift changes randomly. It doesn't help that Jax is my partner. Zane has made his jealousy pretty clear.
But I don't blame him.
I never got over Jax.
I only took a bet on the guy I thought that was better for me.
But is picking the good guy the right thing when you're damaged. I have been nothing but toxic in my entire relationship with Zane.
But I can feel a sense of familiarity with Jax. We both also have been talking a lot more about Leo, since we both were very close to him. Plus his dark eyes has never hid his true feelings for me.
The sexual tension was always present whenever we were around eachother.
We have never acted it out until a week ago.
"You wanna pick up a smoothie on the way?" Jax asked from the driver's seat as he steered through the city. It was both our break and we had bought lunch beforehand. We would always eat by a nearby Park.
"Yeah sure." I responded.
He looked over at me and smirked briefly.
"You look so out of it."
I rolled my eyes at his statement and replied, "yeah well keep your eyes on the road and your hand on the shift."
It was his turn to roll his eyes. "What are you afraid my hand will do?" He slowly reached towards my leg, but as I was about to slap it away, he quickly retrieves it.
He was teasing me.
"You think you're so smart," I gritted through my teeth. He is so frustrating.
I looked over at his side profile as he breaks a grin. His dark hair is longer as it rests on his shoulders. His dark beard is low but growing quickly.
"Why aren't you dating anyone?" I blurted out.
I expected a quick response but the car got unbearably quiet. I cleared my throat.
"Has Jax lost his flow?" I say teasingly.
He breaks a small smile and shook his head. We came up to a stoplight and he pulled to a stop. His dark eyes meet mine and I'm nervous for his response.
"I can't seem to get over this one girl."
Eyes locked, the tension in the car intensifies.
"Who?" My voice was barely audible.
His hand reaches forward as he places it at the crook of my neck. Without moving an inch of my body, I let him have control as if compelled by his touch.
I closed my eyes as I feel his breath on my lips. Luckily he was chewing a gum earlier or I would've gagged.
A loud horn echoed in my ear drums as the car behind us grew two horns.
"Shit," Jax murmured as he places the car in gear and drives off.
Still shocked by what happened, I replay the scenes in my head. What shocked me more is that I wished he kissed me and I didn't feel guilty.
I mean I love Zane. But things haven't been good. They haven't been ever since we moved here or maybe ever since we officially got together.
I took a peak at Jax at the corner of my eye. He gritted his teeth so hard I could see his jaw muscles flexing.
Does he regret it?
We come to a stop as he parked at Smoothie Factory. We quickly got our orders then drove around the corner to the park. The walk to our seats was quiet and awkward.
I began to eat my food without saying a word and he did the same thing.
We chuckled as we saw a guy's butt-crack as he was jogging by.
Before I could finish my sentence, he placed his hands on my cheek and brought his face to mine.
He leaned forward slowly and kissed me gently.
"Jax," I shook my head angrily. "We can't."
"Because of Zane."
"I know you want this. Why did you even choose him over me. I'm the right one for you Ava."
I never expected this from him in a million years. For one, he spoke about his feelings. That's a rare Jax moment. But I guess this all explains the sexual tension. But does that mean I felt the same way since I picked up on it and never did anything to stop it?
One thing for sure is that I never did anything to stop him as we went back to his place. He kissed me aggressively as he pushed me against the door of his bedroom. With one jump, I wrap my legs around him.
He carried me to the bed and placed me on my back as he removed his uniform. I quickly removed mine.
He stared down at my body in need.
"I missed you," Jax whispered.
He surprised me with his tongue as he moves it against my sensitive bud.
I gasped at the sudden contact. It had been ages since I got this. It had also been weeks since Zane and I had sex.
As I was close to climax, Jax slowly inserted his manhood inside me. He fills me up and I flinch at his growth.
As I wrapped my arms around his neck, he increased his speed as he sent me spiralling in pleasure.
"Jax!" I screamed. "That feels so good," I moaned lowly.
Without checking the time to see if they were pass their break, they stayed at the house that evening as Jax racked Ava's sack.
All without knowing that Zane was at home preparing a special dinner to reignite the spark in his relationship with his lovely Avanelle.
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