taking a breather, i stuffed my face into that pillows for a split second as i laid here. as the ticking of the clock echoed through my ears, i laid there for an extra second as i tried to contain my strength for the day.
yanking the covers off of me, i dragged myself out of bed and over to my bathroom. shutting the door behind me, i turned to the sink as i turned the water on.
taking a few minutes, i washed my face and brushed my teeth before turning the water. drying my hands a bit, i made my way out of the bathroom, plopping back down onto my bed.
grabbing my laptop from my bag, i opened it as i allowed it to load before going to check a few emails. after a long minute, i was quickly interrupted by my phone ringing. shifting my head have to my small nightstand, i reached over and grabbed my phone.
my eyes on the screen, it read my moms names. "god, please don't let it be what i think it is. i do not wish to argue with you, Evelyn.."
answering the phone, i placed the phone to my ear and instantly she spoke, "Rebecca?"
i scoff, shaking my head as i held the phone to my ear, shutting my laptop. "yeah, mom, it's me. how can i help you?"
"why did you leave?" she questioned, pausing as she finished her sentence. i heard her sigh softly before continuing, "he loves you."
"i know you did not call me to throw complaints about Barry. i can understand that he misses me but him missing me isn't gonna being me back."
"you have to come back, you just have to," she pressed on, a slight raise of her voice. "he wants to marry you, Rebecca."
"and i don't want to marry him," i scoff, rubbing my face. i sat here, trying to keep myself calm because this was a classic Evelyn move. day after day, she pulled this shit, why would i continue to get upset? "i told him that i don't wish to marry him, he knows that. we're done having this conversation, Evelyn."
"Rebecca," she called out.
"what?" was about all i could utter, irritation feeling my soul as i desperately tried not to end the call.
"please. i-i-i need my daughter.."
"no you don't, you never did, remember? remember all of those things you've said to me because i didn't do things right by you? now that i go off to live my life, you need me? that's bullshit Evelyn and you and i both know that. you want me there to marry Barry and it's not happening. goodbye," not wasting any more time, i pulled the phone off of my ear and hung up. throwing my phone over on the other side of the bed.
sighing softly, i pulled myself out of bed again and made my way over to my door. opening up my door, i made my my way out of the room. shutting my door behind me, i quickly made my way over towards the dinning area.
"morning," Jen spoke, a wave of the hand as i approached the door. "how'd you sleep, lovely?"
i grin, shrugging a bit, "morning, Jen. i slept okay, it wasn't bad or anything, im just coming to terms with living here, you know? but how about you? how'd you sleep?"
she nods, "mhm, yes, i do, it was hard for me because i had left all of my friends and family but sooner than expected, i got used to things here and visiting back home doesn't hurt as much as it once did. however, i slept okay. woke up here and there but it was okay."
"that's good, that's good. im glad to hear that. have you had any breakfast yet or?"
"uh no," she shakes her head, toying with the strings on her joggers. "i just woke up, about an hour ago. how about you? you hungry?"
i shake my head, "im not really a breakfast person but the least i can have is a coffee. i was thinking of going to grab one. would you like one?"
"okay," i nod, pushing myself away from the table as i slide out of the chair. "what kind would you like?"
"tall iced. im plain, i know, i know," she jokes, chuckling softly. "but no, that's all id like. would you like me to pay you when you get back or?"
i shook my head, honking a hand up, "it's okay, i got it, don't worry about it."
exiting the dinning area, i made my way back up to my room, quickly gathered my belongings before exiting the building all together. making my way over to my car, i practically threw myself inside as i turned my engine over.
pulling from the parking lot, i floored it down the road as i rolled the window down a bit. feeling the rush of wind hit me across my face, i felt at easy, for the first time ever.
pushing forward down the road, i was soon interrupted by my phone ringing. quickly look back and forth from the road and my phone, i used my feee hand to grab an answer the phone.
"yes dad? hello?" i answered, trying to keep my focus on the road ahead.
"hi baby girl," he greeted, his warm calming voice echoing through my ears. "how are you doing?"
i grin, "ive been well, just trying to get used to the sudden change, you know?"
"i do, yes. you know how i am, there's always a sudden sprout of changes. you seem like you're driving, are you driving, sweets?"
"i am, yes but im only going to grab coffee. classes for me begin in the afternoon, thankfully.."
"that's good, that's good," he chuckles ever so softly, pausing just for a brief moment before continuing. "but don't drink too much caffeine, you know how you are, Rebecca?"
i chuckle softly, shaking my head, "i don't drink it that much anymore, it's just for when i need the extra boost of energy, i rather not sleep."
"i understand, baby girl, i do but i don't want to keep you for long, i just wanted to call and see how you were doing. i love you, take care of yourself for me and call me if you need anything and i need anything, okay?"
i tuck my bottom lip, gently gnawing on it as his words hit me like a train. sudden rush of emotions hitting me, i gulped down hard, "yes, thank you, dad. i love you so much more..i do, you take care of yourself as well and mom..please."
"i always try, take care, sweetheart."
"of course," i mumble, my finger hovering over the hang up bottom a few seconds before pressing it. sadness settling within me as the sound of the call ending rang through my ear.
this was it, i was on my own, officially.
setting down on my bed, i allowed the silence to swallow me while the sound of the ticking clock echoed through my ears. this still didn't feel real, i didn't know what exactly to make out of it.
it was weird, you know? finally being on my own after all those years of the controlling. i—i was done.
my eyes flicking as they adjusted to the sudden flash of a light, i sat up as my hand searched desperately for my phone. as the flash continued, i soon slammed my hand against my alarm clock, shutting it as which caused the light to stop.
"fuck, finally," i breathed out, running my hands through my hair aimlessly as i grabbed my phone. unlocking it, i went over to message and instantly, my eyes fell upon a message from Barry.
"hey, i uh—im just checking in on you. i hope it's going well and everything is okay, i hope classes are going good for you and they're treating you well—if classes started for you, lol. i miss you, i really do..the house isn't the same without you, you know? your crappy jokes and our late nights..i miss those but i know—i know you have bigger and better things to achieve, im proud of you. but uh i won't keep you long, i love you and i hope this message found you well. i hope you're in a good place, if not, decent, i pray. take care of yourself and i hope to see you soon, love, Barry.."
my heart thumped against my chest as i read the message a few times over, my phone slipping from my hands as the sweat within my palms formed drastically. trying to get a good grip upon my phone, i felt a faint tear run down my cheek as my heart sunk a bit.
my eyes landing on the ring that sat a few feet away from me on my nightstand, i couldn't help but smile as memories of Barry and i hit me.
sighing softly, i wiped my face as i slid out of bed before going over and fixing it. after i finished, i slid on my heels, gathering my belongings as i made my way out of my bedroom. marching down the halls, i made my way over to where the science classes sat as i went over to my classroom.
walking inside, i felt a cool breeze hit me which caused me to shiver ever so slightly. a bit taken back as my eyes take in my surroundings, the setting was about like the entire building, brown. a small chandelier hanging from the middle of the room as it lit up the entire room gracefully.
i grin to myself as i make my way over to my desk, sitting my things down as i began organizing the desk just a bit.
minutes flying by, i soon heard a rush of students as chatter filled the halls. "shit," i mumbled to myself, nervousness hitting me as i shuffled with my papers.
as i finished, i made my way over to the door, opening up the door as i allowed the students inside. settling down in their seats, i walked to the front of the classroom, arms folded as i kept my eyes sharp on them all.
"good afternoon," i spoke, my voice loud and clear as i kept my head high. "i know we've met before, well some of you but i will be your chemistry teacher for the remaining of the year."
"how old are you?" a boy asked, my eyes shifting to my left as i took a quick glance at the kid.
"and your name is?" i questioned, my brows frowning as i watched him closely. it was quite rude to ask for a woman's age but it never hurt to ask.
"ch—charles," he stuttered just slightly as he lowered his head, toying with his fingers.
"well," i cleared my throat, grinning just slightly as i leaned a bit on my toes. "it's a bit rude to ask for a woman's age but im twenty-three, Charles."
"you're young," he chimed.
scoffing, i ran my hands through my hair as i shook my head a bit, "yeah, ive been told."
"aren't you Rebecca Garcia?" a young lady asked, a finger pointed as she held her head at an angle.
i nod, "yes, that's me but please call me Miss. Gracia. can i get your name, love?"
"Rachel, Rachel Williams."
"mmm, okay. well, it being your first day, kind of, i don't have any work for you all to do and we'll be done with classes in about five minutes so you can talk amongst yourself until then."
cheering, they all turned to each other as they began making small talk. looking over at the clock, i watched it tick slowly, the noise echoing through my ears.
taking a small breather, i made my way over to my desk, slumping down into my chair, quickly relaxing.
as the minutes passed, time ticking away ever so slowly, the bell soon rang, indicating the students could be dismissed.
"have a good afternoon, ill see you all tomorrow morning," my voice echoed though the room as they dismissed themselves, a few waving my way.
my eyes desperately trying to stay open as they scanned the room which was now empty, a small sigh of relief as i relaxed.
with a deep breath, i plunged further into my seat as i allowed the silence to take me again, a small gust of wind brushing up against the window. not able to get taken into my thoughts, the door flew open and in walked a student.
"h—hi," she spoke, her voice shaky as she fumbled with her papers. "im sorry, im really sorry, i know classes are over—well this one at least and i— don't know, i was busy with the principal, taking care of my information, im sorry, im so sorry."
shaking my head, a grin appeared on my lips as i slid from behind the desk, "you're fine, it's okay, it's alright. take a breather and relax."
she smiles, relieved as she gathered herself together, "thank you..Miss. Garcia, right?"
i nod, "mhm, that's me."
she extends her hand, "May, May Hall."
"nice to meet you, sweetheart," i wrap my hand around hers, gripping it firmly as i shook it.