Chapter 30 - Truth!
My head felt heavy with a headache. I felt something hard-pressed against my back. I needed to get up.
I removed my palms from my eyes and stretched my hands. My eyes travelled the room, and it was unfamiliar, it wasn’t my room.
Where the hell was I? My eyes landed on myself.
I jumped in surprise. My body was covered with a white bedsheet and nothing underneath. I tried to sit up hurriedly, but couldn’t. Something felt wrapped around my stomach.
I turned my head back and my heart nearly stopped at the sight. Archer was sleeping beside me, naked.
It had to be a dream, must be a dream. I pinched my arm hard.
"Ouch!" I squealed. It fucking hurt.
That meant it was real. I was sleeping on the same bed with Archer, moreover both of us were naked.
I began sweating profusely. What the hell happened?
I tried to unwrap his arm from my waist, but he was heavy and held me tightly. Even when he was sleeping, I had to put quite an effort.
I jerked his hand away and sat up.
His eyelids started to flutter, his eyes opened. He woke up.
A lazy smile appeared on his lips as soon as he saw me. But I sensed his eyes roam on my body as well. And that's when I recalled that I was still naked.
I snatched the bedsheet and covered my body, holding it against my chest.
"W-why am I here? What happened?" I asked him, my heart was beating so fast that it scared me.
The peacefully sated look vanished from his feature. Sighing, he slowly sat up.
"So you don't remember anything, huh?" He asked, running fingers through his hair.
"Remember what?" I asked, gulping hard. He narrowed his eyes at me.
"I didn’t bring you here. You yourself came to my room yesterday and drank to insanity." He gestured to the wine bottle lying on the floor as proof.
My eyes widened, because I saw only the bottle, also the clothes I wore yesterday.
"I returned home late, and you were in my room. I didn’t bring you here, you were the one who cried and told me to make love to you. You were the one who was begging. Believe it or not." He continued.
What he was saying? Was it truth? I felt like my head spinning? How could I do this?
"Whether you deny or not, the truth is, we slept together." He affirmed, giving me a hard stare.
I was literally hyperventilating. It sounded unbeliable. Then I tried recalling yesterday's events. I might not remember having sex with Archer, but I could clearly remember coming to his room and drinking his wine. I could even recall how I mugged his expensive wine.
My hands trembled.
"Hey, are you okay?" Archer asked me.
"I want some water." I said.
He quickly got up and gave me some from the bedside table. I drank the water and felt a bit calmer. I looked at the empty glass on my lap.
If I really came here and had sex with him, I couldn’t undo it.
It was a mistake and both should act like it never happened.
When my eyes landed on Archer, I saw him glaring at me. His jaw was set tightly and fists were clenched.
"Elizabeth, I didn’t rape you. Now, do you find it that loathsome to have sex with me? Yesterday, you literally begged me to take you." He stated.
He misread the situation. I didn’t loathe him. Rather, I wasn’t worthy of him. I didn’t want him to get attached to me.
He was trying for something worthless. I must tell him everything and put a stop to it. I didn’t want to hurt him or get hurt myself.
I took out a deep breath and braced myself to tell him the truth.
"No, Archer. I don't dislike you, let alone loathing you. But I can't be with you. And this time I will tell you everything about me, so you understand. I will tell you the reason." I stated.
"If the reason is you were with someone else before me, then I don't care. It doesn’t decrease your worth even a bit. I don't care about your past." He asserted.
I was stunned. I never expected this from him. Every man cares about the past of his woman. That's all I had known all my life. It was being too good to be true.
At that moment I wished if that was the only thing about me. If that was, I would surrender myself in his strong arms. Which woman didn’t want a good man who would love her with all his heart knowing all her defects?
But I was far more damaged, a good from the ruins. I was queen of misfortune. Tears blurred my vision.
"Archer, that's not the only thing about me. I was betrayed by someone I trusted most. He pushed me to the jaws of hungry animals. I was damaged and abused by people. Don't get attached with the likes of me. People like me can only bring sufferings." I described.
But his face was expressionless. He didn’t seem surprised or disappointed.
"I. Still. Don't. Care." He pressed.
"I want you. You didn’t have any control over the things happened to you in the past. But now you have grown strong. Your past doesn’t define you." He argued. His words were reassuring, but it angered me.
Why was he so adamant?
"Do you still not care if I say that I am barren? You are a billionaire, you will want an heir, but I can't give it to you. I can't give you a fucking family!" I yelled as tears of misery flowed from my eyes.
His stared at me for a few seconds, he didn’t even blink. He must be testing if I was lying to slip away from him. But my eyes might hold more truth than I had ever expressed through my mouth.
He took his eyes off me and lowered his head, looking at the bed. I knew what he was thinking. He must be thinking that all his efforts went in vain, I wasn’t worth at all. I was useless and pitiful.
The truth fucking hurt. I didn’t want to get close to men because of that.
"This is the most painful part of my life. Are you happy to know that now? Now let me go." I implored, joining my both hands." After saying that, I broke into loud sobs.
Archer came to me and held me in his arms. I accepted his comfort, it felt like soothing balm on my wounded heart, broken soul.
"I am sorry. I am so sorry, Elizabeth." He whispered, stroking my head. After I calmed down, the realization dawn upon me.
I cried on his shoulder, he lent me his arms. But I wasn’t supposed to do it. Archer wouldn’t be with me in the future. I pulled myself away from him. He reluctantly let me go.
"I am sorry." I said, wiping my eyes.
"I remember coming to your room yesterday. I was actually waiting for you. I didn’t have any other intention. I saw your wine collection and decided to drink a bit as I was feeling bored. I never thought events will escalate to this point." I admitted.
"But you don't have to worry. I am clean and there isn’t any chances of pregnancy." I assured him.
"So?" He asked.
"Sorry?" I raised my brow.
"You have told me whatever you wanted to say. Now what do you want to do?" He said.
Was there still any room for confusion? He would let me go.
"Let me go." I answered. Archer held my both hands and I glanced at him.
"Elizabeth, it's 21st century. Just because you can't have a child doesn’t mean that you can't have a family. We can definitely marry. We will try every treatment available to treat you, if still not possible, then we can try surrogacy. If not then adoption." He proposed.
The sincerity his I saw in his eyes made me pity him. No matter how much pitiful I was, I couldn’t help that man. He was the epitome of stupid.
A sad laughter slipped out of me.
"Archer, why are you so dumb? I am nothing special. Even if you like so much, and we marry each other, it won’t end well. Today or tomorrow, these matters will not leave us alone. I will live an insecure, unhappy life. I wouldn’t be able to embrace my life. So, please respect my decision." I pleaded.
Archer looked at me for some time and questioned, "Will you answer me something truthfully, Elizabeth?"
"If only that wasn’t the case, if you had the natural ability to mother a child, will you accept me then?" He inquired.
"Yes, of course." I responded.
"Okay, if that's the case, then I am letting you go. But remember one thing that if you ever need my help, I will be there." He spoke.
I smiled and hugged him for one last time. Then I got out of the bed, clenching the sheet around my chest and I limped out of the room.
It hurt every step I took. I was so sore.