Never Again

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Chapter 18

The coffee shop Seth had told Ronin we could meet him at, ends up not being that far away. The driver drops us off out front while he leaves to go find a place to park. I notice that Seth isn’t here as soon as we walk in. My nerves are a bundled up mess.

“Would you like some coffee, love?” Ronin asks me using the endearment I had used not that long ago. It makes butterflies flutter in my stomach hearing that word.

“Yes please.” I say in a very small voice. Ronin walks to the counter and orders two medium iced caramel coffees.

I spin around looking for a seat and notice that we are in luck. I spot a table in the far corner. Ronin and I weave through the people and take our seats. I scoot closer to him as I anxiously wait for Seth to arrive. It isn’t long before he walks in. He sees us sitting in the corner and motions to us that he is going to get a coffee first.

Seth gets his coffee and sits next to us, I can’t hold back … too anxious to know what has him so worked up for this unexpected get together. “Is everything okay Seth? You look horrible.” I notice that he looks almost green in color.

Seth looks at me and then back at Ronin—then he looks back at me again. I realize that he isn’t sure that if what he has to say should be said in front of Ronin.

“It’s okay, Ronin can stay.” I say not even knowing what Seth is about to tell me.

Seth takes a deep breath in, “Treva, I have some terrible news.”

Instinctively, I grab Ronin’s hand and squeeze it hard … needing someone to comfort me. “What happened Seth … mom … dad … Denise?” I’m about to lose my mind.

Seth shakes his head and looks away; he’s unable to look directly at me. “TELL ME SETH.” I say sternly as my stomach ties up in knots.

“He’s out Treva.” He pauses briefly.

I’m more confused. My brain doesn’t register what he is saying.

“Eric got out of prison, the same day you got here.”

My body stiffens, and I fly into panic mode hearing the awful news. Seth was right; the news was terrible.

“WHAT? … NO! … THAAT’S IMPOSSIBLE! ... BUUUT … BUT … HOW? NO SETH!” My head is buzzing as I stammer and yell to Seth. I can’t focus on anything and I feel like things are spinning out of control. If I don’t grab onto something soon, I’m going to hit the floor. I get a glimpse of Ronin and freeze. He knows nothing of my past and now it’s all being laid out for him. Tears well up in my eyes, and I cup my hands over my face not wanting him to see me like this. “I need to get out of here!” I quickly get up from my chair, almost knocking the table over. My coffee cup ends up on the floor as I head for the door.

I think I hear my name being called from somewhere behind me, but my instincts just tell me to run. I need to get as far away as possible. My heart pounds like a hammer in my chest. I’m having a hard time breathing through my sobs. The only sounds I recognize are the soles of my feet slapping against the concrete sidewalk and the hollowly echoing sound of my staggered breaths. I have no idea where I am going—I realize I have run to a part of town that I have never seen before. My pace slows and I try to calm myself … so out of breath.

My chest burns with a dull pain over my heart, but I ignore it. I stare around at the upscale neighborhood that I have stumbled into. I wish I could be in one of those homes safe from the crazy world around me. I think to myself. My heartbeat has slowed, but a deep pain is still burning inside. I rub at my chest and now my left arm feels oddly numb with a weird tingling sensation. I panic a little at the new burning sensation in my chest and arm. I have had panic attacks before—brought on by thoughts of that evil bastard, Eric—but this is unusual. I walk aimlessly towards nothing—clutching at my arm.

I hear the motor of a vehicle approaching from behind and watch as it drives by slowly. Not registering that the brake lights are on … I just keep walking.

“Treva?” A soft spoken voice says as the door of the unrecognizable vehicle opens.

“Matt,” I say through tight lips barely audible.

“What are you doing way over here?” he asks me.

“I–I … dunno,” I stammer.

I see him jump out of the red vehicle and walk up to me. “Are you okay?”

I can’t find any words to answer him. I let my head fall as the tears pour down my cheeks … shaking my head no.

“Come on, lets get you off the street sweetheart.” Matt wraps his arm around me and guides me gently to his car. He opens the door and helps me get inside.

His door slams shut, and it makes me jump in my seat. I try really hard to keep from looking at him, but I can feel him looking at me to see if there are any physical signs of me being hurt. I see all the questions in his eyes, but he doesn’t ask me anything.

“How about a drive.” He says, and I nod my head in agreement.

We sit in silence while riding. I am somewhat aware that we drive over the Coronado Bridge, and I see the bar where Seth, Ronin and I had played pool. When we go past the hotel in Coronado, everything seems to open up.

Matt pulls into a parking lot lined with white sandy beaches. I can see the waves, and they seem comforting. I rub my arm and chest absentmindedly, and Matt notices my movement.

“Are you okay? You have been tugging and pulling at your arm the entire way here?

“I was?” I asked shocked. “To be honest I’m not sure. My chest is on fire and my arm feels kind of numb.”

“Does your family have history of heart attacks?” he asks concerned. I don’t know why I hadn’t even thought about my pain being something as serious as a heart attack. I try to rack my brain thinking about our family history, but I can’t recall anyone having heart problems. I shake my head no.

“Here try one of these.” He says while getting a pill bottle from his center console. He hands me a tiny yellow pill.

“What is it?” not wanting to take some drug without knowing what it is.

“It’s a Zanax. It helps with panic attacks and anxiety.” He shoves the pill toward me. “Trust me Treva, it will help. I’m pretty sure you’re having a panic attack.” He sounds confident. “My sister is kind of a mess. Large crowds stress her out, so my entire family keeps a stash of these just in case.”

I pop the pill in my mouth and he hands me a bottle of water. I see the relief in his face as he seems to become more relaxed. He runs his fingers though his long blonde hair and opens the door. Before I can even blink, he is at my door opening it up for me. “Come on,” he says, reaching his hand out for me.

I get out of the car, and he sweeps me up and puts me on the hood of his car. I can’t stop the squeal that escapes my lips. His eyebrows quirk up and he gives me a handsome grin. I’m not sure what he is doing until he is pulling at me shoes. I watch as he slides one of my sandals off slowly and then the other. I rest my hand on his shoulder to keep my balance, until he slowly stands up. His strong arms reach around my waist and he pulls me off the car.

“You can’t get the full experience of walking on the beach unless you are barefoot.” He says in a seductive tone.

“And what about you?” I point down to his shoes. He smiles at me again and leans down to remove his loafers.

We walk from the parking lot to the sandy beach. It’s not particularly warm out today, and the cold sand sends shivers over my arms.

“Are you cold?” He asks concerned.

“Not bad.” But before I can say another word, he takes his suit jacket off, and wraps it around my shoulders. I had been so out of it I hadn’t even noticed how Matt is dressed. He is wearing a white button down shirt with the top button undone. His bright green tie hangs undone under the collar. He’s wearing black slacks, and his jacket is the perfect match. I nuzzle into the oversized jacket feeling very comfortable. I can smell his masculine scent now nestling around me.

In a quick flick, I see his eyes gleam at my behavior. He holds my hand and we walk along the cold beach … making deep footprints in the sand.

“I’m sorry Matt.” I say apologetically.

I see his head turn towards me in confusion. “For what, Treva?”

“You’re so kind to me, and I know that I have done some hurtful things to you.” I remember when I left him hanging at the bar as Ronin ripped me away from him. “You should probably stay as far away from me as you can.” I whisper.

“And why the hell would I want to do that?”

I shake my head in shame, “I’m not a very good person, and the things from my past will push anyone away that gets too near.”

“Treva, I’m not sure about your past, but you are a strong, independent woman … and beautiful,” he trails off.

“Matt I push everyone away who tries to get close. I don’t want to ever feel the pain again that I’ve gone through; it was excruciating. Never again! I will never do it again.”

Matt stops and stands in front of me. Tears fill my eyes, because I know he has no clue about what I am talking about. I don’t know if I should let him in on my secret.

“Treva.” Matt says softly to me tucking a strand of my wavy hair behind my ear, “You don’t have to take on everything all by yourself. There are a lot of people around you who are more than willing to help.”

Tears pool up in my eyes, and I am unable to hold them back any longer. Matt leans down and kisses my forehead gently, “it’s okay to cry, I’m here.”

I’m comforted by his words, and I believe what he said—not only him, but everyone else that has been telling me that I have others that I can lean on in times like this.

I tug on his hand and twist around to start walking again. After a while, I start to tell him about my horrible, nightmare—kidnapping without sugar coating anything. I feel his hand tense up during some of the terrible things that I tell him about. Actually, I can’t believe how easy it is for me to tell him everything. I notice him glance at his phone a couple of times, but he doesn’t interrupt me as I let go of all my pent up feelings … telling him everything.

I stop talking and look around. The beach is desolate and the sunlight that we had is gone. “OH,” I say surprised. “It’s dark.”

“That Zanax must have helped.” He teases. “Come on doll, lets head back to the car. There are a lot of people wondering where you are.”

My heart aches remembering how I took off from Seth and Ronin. “They must be sick with worry,” I say feeling horrible.

“They’ll be fine, once I tell them that you’re with me and that you’re safe.” He adds.

Once we are back in Matt’s car, he leans over and gently touches my cheek. He seems to be bothered by something as he takes his phone from his pocket.

“I found her,” I hear him say. “Yes, she’s ok.” He nods at me and gives me a sexy wink.

A smile pulls at the corners of my lips, knowing at that moment that my secret is safe with him … he will protect me.

“Did I mention that Mustangs are my favorite car?” I say shyly while I rub the dash of his car.

“Really?” Matt looks at me surprised and then grins widely. “Mine too!”

He pulls out of the parking lot at the beach, and I turn the radio on. The song that blares out of the radio makes me smile and I lift my eyebrows toward Matt.

“What, you don’t like, Tool?”

“On the contrary, I love them! I saw them in concert in Billings one time. It was awesome.”

My confession makes him smile, and he reaches for the stereo to turn it up louder. When he is done fiddling with the volume, he lets his hand rest on mine … rubbing my fingers gently.

We arrive at Seth’s apartment. Again, I think about Eric, my nightmare released from prison. My whole body shifts and contorts in displeasure at the thought of that monster being free. Matt squeezes my hand in silence giving me a reassuring sign that he’s still there. Ronin’s eyes burst wide open when he recognizes Matt’s car pull up to the curb, and he runs to my door. The door flings open and Ronin has me pulled up into his arms in a breathtaking hug.

“Treva, I have been so worried about you!” He pulls away from me for a second, and frowns when he sees the jacket that I have draped across my shoulders. He takes his jacket off, and then takes mine off and replaces it with his. Matt stands as he gets out of his car, and Ronin tosses his jacket to him. “Thanks man, I got this now.”

“Treva, are you okay?” Matt asks me without looking at Ronin.

“Thank you Matt, you helped a lot!” I smile warmly at him having a twinkle of longing in my gut for him as Ronin tries to pull me away.

“If you need me, just let me know, okay.”

“Thanks Matt … I mean it,” I say while Ronin grumbles under his breath protectively.

Seth is now by my other side wrapping his arm around my waist consolingly. “Are you okay Sis?” His warm breath seeps over my neck and I feel guilty for making him worry.

“I’m good Seth. I just needed to figure out what you said to me. I needed to breathe.”

“How did you find her?” Seth asks Matt over my shoulder.

“I was on my way home and this angel somehow had wandered to my neighborhood. I just happened to drive by at the right time.”

I feel Ronin’s arms tighten around me when Matt calls me an angel. I let a smile creep out without showing my response to Mr. Overprotective and over bearing. It’s funny, but I hadn’t even thought about how Matt came upon me until now. He had come along just at the right time.

“Thank god. Thank you, bro.” Seth sighs heavily with relief.

I inhale deeply, as the aroma of Ronin fills my senses. “I’d love a shower.” I mumble numbly.

“Hey wait! Treva your shoes.” Matt runs around the car dangling my sandals from his fingers.

Seth reaches out and grabs them for me, and I sneak a grin to Matt. He winks back at me and then with a smug look he looks at Ronin.

“Get out of my way Matt,” Ronin growls.

Matt laughs and turns back towards his car, sprinting with amazing ease.

Seth, Ronin and I go up to Seth’s apartment and they bathe me with comfort.

“I’ll go start your shower.” Seth announces as he heads down the hallway.

“Do you need a glass of wine?” Ronin asks me while I sit on the couch.

I nod my head yes, “mmm, that sounds good.”

Ronin presses his lips to mine with a fierceness I have never felt before. I respond by pushing my hands through his thick russet hair. Reluctantly, he frees himself from our spellbinding kiss and goes to the kitchen.

“Red or white?” he yells over his shoulder.


He comes back with a glass filled to the brim with a dark burgundy colored wine and I sip on it as he kneels before me on the floor. “Treva, I have been worried sick about you. I thought I was going to have to call the police if Matt hadn’t called Seth.”

I see the worry lines on his forehead and my gut churns with guilt. My whole intentions were not to make them worry. I just needed some space. I needed to collect my thoughts. I’m not sure how my life will be now, knowing that a deranged psychopath is on the loose. My body starts trembling with a deep fear as I remember why I ran from the coffee shop in the first place.

“It’s alright. You’re going to be alright.” Ronin says soothingly trying to get my body to stop shaking.

“The shower is on.” Seth says as he comes down the hall.

Ronin doesn’t give me the chance to get to my feet he scoops me up into his arms and carries me down the hall. I lay my head on his chest feeling comforted by his warmth … so safe and secure when I’m with him. Seth must have opened the door, because Ronin doesn’t move his hands from me. The room is steamy when we step in, and I feel the movement of Ronin’s leg lifting back to push the door closed behind him. Ronin kicks off his shoes, and I expect him to put me down to undress me. Instead, he just steps into the shower with us both fully clothed. “Ronin you’re going to ruin your clothes.”

“Shh, I just need to hold you NOW. Taking off clothes would take too long,” he says letting the warm water run over us.

My eyes meet his and the way he looks soaking wet with his hair hanging soaked in his eyes is so hot. I grab him around his neck and pull his face down to meet my lips. My mouth moves eagerly against his, needing his comfort, needing his touch. Ronin lets my legs go gently, so I am able to stand. My hands find the hem of his T-shirt and I rip it over his head. His bare chest drizzling with water is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I trace my tongue along his chest where the water runs over him, feeling every contour with purpose, and making sure to taste every inch. I want to get him etched in my mind forever.

I keep kissing his chest … licking and savoring every bit of him. I can’t stop the pull of my instincts to move lower as I slowly work my way down to his ribs and his rock hard abs. I go down even further—circling around his solar plexus, but stopping to let my tongue roam over his belly button—seductively licking it before sliding it in. Ronin grabs my hair tightly and moans. I can feel the vibrations through his abdomen, and it sends impulses of fervent passion soaring through my core. My fingers find the button on his jeans, and pull it through the opening. I look up at Ronin’s mesmerizing eyes as I find the zipper. Slowly I slide it down. His gaze his so intense, and I can feel the heat searing through me. I feel like a fire is burning deep in my belly … getting hotter by the minute. My desire is overwhelming, and I need him now. I pull at his water-drenched pants that hang heavily around his waist, eventually letting them fall to the shower floor. I tease the rim of his boxers with my tongue … slowly gliding across the elastic waist band before pulling them off.

Ronin’s amazing manhood twitches in anticipation as I grab his thickness with my hands. Slowly, I massage his huge cock with my hands. I watch it pulsate as it gets bigger and bigger. His head rocks back, and he spreads his legs farther apart trying to keep his balance while I grope him. I don’t notice if my knees are sore from the hard bathtub floor, but at the moment nothing else matters to me. The only thing that I care about right now is the man standing in front of me. I lean my face forward brushing my tongue against the tip of him—tasting the pre-cum beading on the head. I want to taste more, so I slide my lips around him and put it in my mouth. I pull and tease, letting my lips just past his sensitive head before I glide my mouth back up and over him. I flick him with my tongue, and then let my mouth glide back down over his ridges stopping just below the head of his throbbing erection. I pull back again, and hear his loud moans echoing through the steam filled shower. He places his hand to the back of my head urging me forward, but I fight back—I don’t want all of him in my mouth, “not yet,” I mumble.

His heavy sigh makes me giggle knowing how bad I am teasing him right now. I gently slide my mouth over him again repeating the torture of not letting him feel my whole mouth. I feel a deep tingling sensation between my legs while teasing him. It drives me wild knowing what I am doing to him, but I don’t know how long I can hold out. I want him to take me. I want him to numb the pain I have experienced today. I let my mouth take him all in, and I gag when he pushes it to the back of my throat. The gagging impulse turns us both on. When Ronin hears me gag, he pushes it further into my mouth. I can hardly breathe, but I want all of it. I reach my hands around to his bare ass and dig my fingernails into it … letting him push it deeper. I feel his cock jerk, I pull away—I don’t want him to shoot off yet. I inhale deeply when I back off. Ronin is breathing heavy as I watch his cock twitch violently in my face.

“Na- huh, I’m not ready for you to be done yet.” I say with a devilish stare.

“Oh my god woman you are going to be the death of me,” he says through heavy breaths.

I smile at him before I grip his thick shaft again and pull him deeply back into my mouth. I push down hard onto him and then pull back … keeping just the tip of his cock in my mouth before I go down him again, and again. Once more, I feel his cock jerking against my tongue, and I pull myself from him before he is able to finish.

“DEVIL” he yells.

Ronin grabs me under my arms and pulls me to my feet. He removes the sundress that I’ve been since leaving his house this morning. He pulls at my pink panties and tears them away from my body. He pulls my bra down allowing my breasts to burst out over the cloth pushing them up fully. Then, he cups one in his hand and leans down closing his mouth over my nipple. He sucks on it while twisting and flicking it with his tongue. I feel it harden and pucker to his touch. It’s so sensitive, and I squeal in pleasure. Ronin lets go of my breast, leaving it feeling lonely and wanton. He finds my other nipple and gives it the same treatment. He stands up looking down at me massaging both breasts with his deft hands, and making every inch of my body pulsate with sexual desire. His mouth closes over mine while my small voice hums into him. Our mouths fit together like they were custom made for each other.

“Ronin,” I pant.

The water is starting to cool off, and I feel Ronin shift around to turn it off. When he brings his hand back, he places his palm flat to my belly and then gently slides it down finding its way between my legs. He is methodically massaging my folds—feeling how slick and wet I am, and then he slides two fingers into me. The pleasure is driving me crazy. Ronin has a way to make me feel absolutely euphoric. I kiss him fervently as he pushes deeper inside, and causing a deep burning sensation to grow in my lower abdomen. I can feel that I am so close to that wonderful release. I tighten my grip on Ronin, and I pant heavily into his mouth.

“Na, huh,” he says, “I’m not ready for you to be done yet.” He stops leaving me feeling suspended with no relief.

“Ugh,” I say as I pound against his chest with my fist.

His beautiful smile lightens up his entire face, even reaching to his eyes. Ronin grips my waist and pulls my legs around his hips. I tighten my grip by locking my ankles together and he balances me by grabbing under my ass cheeks. He slowly pulls me onto him. My head falls back and I gasp from the unfathomable fullness that now replaces his fingers. Ronin lifts me, rocking me upwards and then downwards onto his swollen cock, pulling and pushing more aggressively with each thrust. My body responds to him—letting his vastness extend to the very depths of me. Not one of my overly-sensitive tissues remains untouched. A rumbling force is unleashed as Ronin penetrates so deeply that I’m unable to contain it. He reacts to my tightening muscles. I can feel how easy it is for him to push into me with how slick I am between my legs.

“Treva, holy shit woman, you drive me absolutely insane.”

Ronin nuzzles his face into my neck and leaves a trail of kisses down to my collar, making me pant even heavier than I already am. I grip my hands tighter against his strong muscular back, and tighten the squeeze of my legs to keep me from slipping from him. Ronin never slows his thrusts, and he just pushes harder when he feels my legs wrap tighter around him. His breathing is so heavy. Every time he breathes, I feel the muscles in his back tighten.

The building force is back … tenfold in my lower abdomen, and making me strain. I try to hold onto the feeling, but it wants freed, “RONIN!” I yell with extreme pleasure—when my eyes meet his, he growls loudly thrusting harder and slower as he vigorously releases his built up tension.

He relaxes his taught muscles in his arms and let’s go of my legs so that I can straighten and stand. I feel so wobbly. I grab onto the edge of the shower to keep my balance.

“Treva, what are you doing to me?” Ronin asks quietly shaking his head in defeat.

“Good sex will do that to you.” I tease.

Ronin kisses the top of my head and graces me with his drop-dead-gorgeous smile. Then, he turns the shower back on. I savior the hot water pouring over us—trying to enjoy this moment before the reality of Eric starts to creep back into my mind.

After our shower Ronin wraps a towel around his waist, making it almost impossible for me to concentrate on anything, but his remarkable sexy body. He follows closely behind me as I dart to the spare bedroom. I find a pair of yoga pants and a tank top to put on. The comfort clothes will help me relax. Ronin hops onto the bed, letting his towel slide from his finely trimmed hips. I stare in disbelief as he lies on his side with one hand tucked under his head watching me. My breaths increase, and I find myself unable to move. I just stare at his well sculpted body.

“Come here Treva,” he demands.

I just nod in compliance and climb onto the bed next to him. I curl up next to his warm body and find it compellingly comforting.

“Crap!” I yell.

“What is it?” Ronin grabs me and turns me toward him.

“I forgot about your Christmas party tonight. We missed it.” I sigh dismally.

“It’s ok. I was much too worried about you to worry about a Christmas party. Besides, there will be plenty of those to attend in the future.”

“But … I feel bad. And I wrecked it for you.” I say feeling completely trounced.

“It’s really not a problem, Treva. Now stop worrying and just relax.”

I try to let everything go as I snuggle up tightly against his hard, yet extremely comforting chest. I feel overwhelmed by everything, and I just want it all to go away. I let the heat from Ronin permeate through my skin and I feel my body relaxing. After a while, I doze off.

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