I felt Dimitri reach out to me but I pushed him away from me. “Izzie, fuck, why didn’t you tell me?” He growled in anger as he reached out his hands towards me. “Baby, please let me help you.” He spoke softening his voice but I kept pushing him away.
“Don’t touch me!” I yelled and he immediately backed away, holding his hands up in surrender. I don’t know why I was pushing him away when it was all my fault, I gave him permission and didn’t stop him when I should have. But in the moment, I just wanted to blame Dimitri. I wanted to hurt him for hurting me.
I knew I was being irrational but I didn’t care. I didn’t want him anywhere near me. I tried getting up, I needed a shower, I felt sticky and disgusting and everything hurt and I wanted to get away from Dimitri.
But the pain was too much, I couldn’t handle it. “Izzie baby, I’m so sorry.” Dimitri whispered as he knelt down beside my curled, shaking body. “Please let me help you! Please let me take care of you! I’m so goddamn sorry Izzie, I’m very very sorry!” He exclaimed.
I started crying more as I met Dimitri’s eyes filled with so much love and care, so much worry and fear, so much guilt and anger at himself, so much passion and emotion. It wasn’t his fault, it was mine.
I wanted to give my King everything he wanted, because he deserved it. He’s perfect to me and I was the one who kept telling him to go through with it, despite the many times he stopped to ask if I was okay, whether he should stop, whether I was sure about my decision.
“Izzie, you have no idea how sorry I am, fuck if I knew... If I knew this would happen I never would have brought the idea up. Izzie please talk to me, I’m scared.” He spoke and it was true, I could see the terror clouding his eyes. “Please, I’m scared I hurt you.”
I reached my arms out to him and he immediately pulled me to him. I buried my face in his shoulders, muffling my sobs. “Please don’t cry Izzie! It hurts me knowing I caused you this pain. Why didn’t you stop me?” His voice broke at the end.
“I-I wanted t-to be good enough for you.” I sobbed into his shoulders as he stroked my hair, gently. “I w-wanted to give you e-everything you wanted. Y-you’re so good to me, a-all the time. I wanted to repay you for loving me so f-fiercely.”
“Oh Izzie,” He spoke with so much pain in his voice. “Love isn’t a bargain, it has no terms, no deals. Love is free and when I’m giving it to you I’m giving it for free, because I want to. Not because I want anything in return, not so you can repay me back but because I’m in love with you! Because I care about you more than I’ve ever cared about anyone else, because I just goddamn love you Izzie and I want to give you the world and more!”
He gently picked me up into his arms and started carrying me upstairs. I wrapped my arms around his neck, burying myself into him and his warmth and love. “You think I have needs, sexual needs and for some goddamn reason you think you’re not good enough for me and that you don’t satisfy those needs. Yes, I will admit, I do have sexual needs but I will also admit that you satisfy all my needs, every single one. Never once have I felt my needs weren’t being met. Never, except now.” He spoke. “Today was the first day my needs weren’t met. More than my sexual needs, I have stronger needs to keep you safe, to make you happy always and to love you forever. Those are the strongest needs I have and they weren’t met today. I didn’t succeed in making you happy today. I didn’t succeed in keeping you safe. I failed like I’ve never failed before. I can’t believe I did’t realize the pain I was causing you. It was my job to stay aware of you, to make sure I was making you happy but instead I hurt you.”
He took me to the bathroom and set me down on the ground. I immediately lost my balance, crying out at the pain I felt, but Dimitri instantly caught me. “Seems like you won’t be able to walk for a while.” He frowned down at me and I looked away. “I’d usually be happy to know that you aren’t able to walk after being done with me, but not like this. And your Dad’s going to kill me when he sees his daughter isn’t able to walk properly because she’s in so much pain. I’m so thankful their business trip got extended or else I don’t think I’d ever be allowed to see you after today. Not that I deserve to anyways.” He carried me back to my room and set me down on my bed because I really couldn’t stand. He then went back to the bathroom and I heard him running the bath.
I felt so much love for him. He loved me too much, more than I deserved. I was the one who didn’t deserve him, not the other way around.
He then came back to me, and gave me a sad smile watching me curled up on the bed. He then picked me up and brought me to the bathroom again. “It wasn’t your fault. Don’t blame yourself.” I whispered but by the look on his face I could tell that was exactly what he was doing.
“I’m going to take care of you now, okay baby? I don’t want you to do anything except relax and trust me and let me take care of you.” He spoke with seriousness in his voice and I just nodded my head. “I’m going to get in the bath with you but only if you want me to.” He said and I nodded my head.
“Don’t let go of me.” I whispered and he smiled at me. He then got into the warm water, carrying me in with him. He sat down in the tub, placing me right in front of him. I rest my head against him, loving the feel of the warm water against me. It was really soothing to the pain I felt. I was starting to feel really sleepy especially feeling Dimitri’s hands over my body, cleaning me. It was so soothing.
His hands were so gentle with me and he was handling me as if I’d break into a billion tiny little pieces at even the slightest of pressure.
Soon we were done and he wrapped me in a towel before wrapping himself in one. He then carried me out the bathroom and made me lie down on the bed. He was hovering above me as he placed me down. I instantly wrapped my arms around his neck, holding him down as he hovered over me.
He gave me a sad smile before reaching down and pressing a soft kiss against my lips. “I’m so sorry.” He whispered. “Will you forgive me?” And I felt tears prick my eyes again.
“Don’t apologize Dimitri. Please don’t blame yourself.” I whispered stroking his face.
“How can I not?” He asked frowning. “It was my job to make sure you were okay.”
“I made you think I was okay Dimitri, it wasn’t your fault.” I spoke as I pulled his head down and he rested it on my shoulders.
“I don’t ever want to hurt you like that ever again. I don’t want to hurt you in any way!” He exclaimed. “We are not having sex again.”
I suddenly looked at him in shock. “Yes Izzie, we aren’t. Not until you learn your own worth and realize that you’re perfect the way you are. Not until you learn that all I want in this universe is you. Not until you learn to tell me the truth and not let me hurt you like that again. Who knows how many times I’ve hurt you and you didn’t ever tell me. Fuck Izzie, I could have hurt you so many times and I don’t even know!”
“You didn’t hurt me ever before Dimitri.” I spoke but he shook his head.
“I don’t know what to believe Izzie. You told me today you were fine even though you clearly weren’t. And even now you’re probably saying that so I don’t feel bad.” He frowned, pulling away from me so he could look down at me. “I want to know the truth Izzie. I want you to trust me and my love for you and I want you to be open with me. Have I done anything to make you believe you weren’t good enough for me and that I wasn’t satisfied with you? Have I ever made you feel forced into doing something you didn’t want to? Do you even like having sex with me or do you just do it because you feel like you have to?”
“Of course I like having sex with you, I love it! Please stop doubting everything Dimitri. You know exactly how much I love being with you. You even see the proof in the way my body reacts to your touch! I love you Dimitri and I just didn’t want to deny you anything. I wanted to give you everything you ever wanted, that’s all.” I said as I stroked his jaw gently.
“The only thing I want is for you to always be happy.” He spoke before he leaned down and kissed me, this time more slower and deeper. “That is everything I want. Can you give me that? Your happiness?” He asked and I hugged him to me. He was so perfect and I had no idea how I got so lucky to have him as mine.
A week later was our date night that we planned and I had no idea where we were going. Dimitri had left me a beautiful red dress to wear and I happily put it on, marvelling at its beauty. Dimitri really knew how to choose a dress.
It was a long dress, all the way down to my feet and it cinched in tight at my waist while the skirt poofed out around me. The dress was off the shoulder on both arms, and it was low-cut from the front. The back was exposed with little strings crisscrossing, creating this beautiful detailing.
I curled my hair so it would sit softly against my shoulders. I then really took the time to perfect my makeup, wanting to make sure it looked really nice.
I wanted to look pretty for Dimitri.
Just as I was spritzing on some perfume, I heard the door bell ring and I grinned. I quickly grabbed my purse, did a quick check in the mirror before I went downstairs to open the door.
And just when I did, I think my heart stopped. Dimitri was standing in a suit, his hair slicked back with some gel and he looked so handsome. I had never seen him in a suit before and my heart was having a really hard time processing it.
Dimitri had a shocked look on his face too before he pulled me towards him. He leant down and brought his mouth to my ears, taking my earlobe into his mouth for a moment. “You are so beautiful Isabella.” His voice came out low and husky and I shivered as his warm breath hit my neck and a minty scent wafted towards me. “The most beautiful girl I’ve ever met.”
“You are too.” I whispered back causing Dimitri to smirk in amusement.
“I’m the most beautiful girl you ever met too?” He asked letting out a chuckle as I smacked his arm.
“You know what I meant!” I exclaimed as he took my hand in his and we walked towards the car.
“I know.” He said as he opened the door for me, before I got in, thanking him.
I tried asking him where we were going but he wouldn’t tell me, no matter how much I pried, he wouldn’t let out a word.
I noticed we were going into the forest and I was really curious now. Eventually we came to this area where all the trees were covered in tiny beautiful lights, interwoven between the leaves and branches, little flowers woven alongside the lights.
All the trees alongside the path Dimitri was driving through were decorated until we reached this open clearing and I gasped at how beautiful it was. There were so many beautiful flowers everywhere and they were lit up by candles, little fairylights and lanterns. There was a table set up in the middle for dinner and a huge bouquet of flowers stood in the middle. The chairs were dusted with rose petals and the table had little rose petals scattered over it as well. The rose petals surrounded the ground around the table too.
“Dimitri.” I whispered in awe and I didn’t even realize that he had already gotten out of the car and was holding the door open. He held out his hand for me to take and I took it, getting out of the car. There was soft music playing in the background that I heard as soon as I got out.
“Do you like it?” He asked and I smiled up at him.
“Of course I love it!” I exclaimed as I immediately pulled him into a hug.
“I’m glad.” He let out a relieved sigh. “I wasn’t sure if you would.” He said as he led me to the table. He pulled my chair out for me and I sat down, before he pushed my chair in.
He then sat down on the chair opposite me and suddenly a bunch of waiters appeared placing dinner in front of us. And suddenly there was so much food to choose from that I didn’t even know where to begin.
“This is all so beautiful and romantic Dimitri! You didn’t have to do this!” I exclaimed but he only shook his head and smiled.
“You deserve only the best.” He spoke and I couldn’t help but smile as I dug into the food, which by the way tasted like absolute heaven. I don’t think I’ve ever tasted food this good.
While we ate, Dimitri and I talked about everything and I mean everything, really just loving this moment together. Dimitri was telling me about some of his best moments as a child, which included memories of his parents and the mischief he and Devon created for everyone. Some of the stories were really funny, such as the one where Devon and Dimitri kept messing with the food their chef made, adding in random ingredients and the chef couldn’t ever figure out what he did wrong. Or when he they switched Devon’s cousin’s shampoo with hair dye and changed her hair to a bright orange colour.
“You should have seen her face. She was absolutely furious and it looked so funny with her crazy messed up orange hair.” He explained with a laugh as I shook my head.
“You guys are actually horrible, poor girl! How could you even do that? If you guys did something like that to me, none of you would live to see the next day!” I exclaimed still shocked they’d do that to the poor girl.
“Well I guess it wouldn’t be too bad to die at your hands.” He winked and I rolled my eyes.
Soon desert was served and it was a chocolate cheesecake, my absolute favourite. “Oh my goodness, this is so freaking good!” I moaned after taking the first bite.
“It’s good.” He said, “But nowhere near as good as you. You taste so much more sweeter.” He smirked as I blushed.
Once we were done, the waiters came and cleaned off our table. “Now that we’re done eating, do you want to dance for a bit?” Dimitri asked and I nodded my head. Dimitri then came up to me and held out his hand for me to take.
He then pulled me off my chair and took me out to an open area. The music was louder here. He pulled me up close as he placed his hands on my waist. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he pressed his forehead down against mine. We then slowly started swaying to the soft music, completely losing ourselves in the moment.
Dimitri was staring down at me so intensely as I felt him move his hands up and down my waist. I slid my fingers into his hair, running them through his soft strands. “You really are the most beautiful woman in all of existence.” I blushed feeling shy as I stared down at the ground. “It’s true.” Dimitri whispered as we stopped dancing and he placed a finger under my chin, making me look up at him.
“You make me feel so special Dimitri.” I whispered as I got up on my tiptoes and placed a sweet kiss against his lips.
“Well, you are very special to me.” He said with a smile before he started reaching into his pocket. “I still have to give you your graduation gift.” Dimitri said as he took out a box.
He opened it and inside was the most beautiful necklace I’ve ever seen. It was made of a really beautiful gemstone which I couldn’t recognize. “This necklace was one of the reasons I was really busy. I got it made specially for you by this really rare gemstone you can only find in Rovana. It’s called Lovesand. I didn’t even know it actually existed, I always thought it was a myth. No one has ever seen this gemstone in over hundreds of centuries and everyone had started to believe it wasn’t real.” Dimitri said as he removed it from the box. “You see there’s a story behind this gemstone. The story was that only those who were truly in love with their lovers could find this gemstone. Only those whose love was pure and true could find it. And there’s only this one certain place in Rovana that you can find it. Many people have tried searching for it but no one was able to in such a long time. The last Demon who found it was hundreds of centuries ago so everyone assumed the gemstone to be a myth. And then I decided I’d go searching for it, for you. And I found it!”
Dimitri said as he made me turn around so he could place the necklace around my neck and close it. “Dimitri, this is absolutely beautiful!” I exclaimed as I swooned at the whole story behind the gemstone. The necklace was beautiful, the whole story was beautiful. “I love you so much.” I whispered as I turned around and grabbed his face in between my hands. “No one’s ever done something this special for me.” I said as I brought his lips down to mine, throwing all my passion into this kiss. I wanted to show him how much I loved and appreciated him. I wanted to show him he meant the world to me.
“Easy, Izzie.” He whispered against my lips as he smiled, and now we were both smiling into the kiss and I felt so happy and free.
Dimitri then suddenly flipped me around so my back was facing his front. He wrapped his arms around my waist as he kissed down my back. I let out a soft sigh as his wonderful lips kissed my skin.
He then pulled away and grabbed my hand, interlocking our fingers together. “I’m going to stop because I know that if we continue any longer, I’ll have you pinned to the ground completely naked. And besides, I want to take you somewhere else.” He said as we started walking. I had no idea where we were going but I quietly followed, controlling my breathing at the way his words made me feel. The thought of him pinning me down naked, had my head spinning with desire, but I quicky pushed it away.
I looked up at Dimitri and I noticed he looked tense suddenly, almost a little nervous. “Are you okay?” I asked and he looked down at me, giving me a small smile while nodding his head to let me know he was fine. He then leant down and kissed my cheek.
Eventually we came to this beautiful place by the river and I gasped at its natural beauty. The moon was out shining so bright, throwing soft white light over the smooth river and the beautiful rocks against the sides. The dark sky was also filled with a billion tiny stars and it was the most beautiful thing ever.
“Oh my God, Dimitri this is-” I started to say but gasped suddenly as I looked down at him, kneeling on the ground beside me on one knee, holding a box out.