My Twisted Lovers - Book Two of The Forbidden Lust

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Chapter 130

CONNORS P.O.V.

I can’t see her.

Looking around the hall I try not to make it too obvious but she hasn’t answered a single text and I know this may be the only chance I get to talk to her before we come back to class in January.

I can’t believe I did that to her. I can’t believe I practically threatened her like that, it was such an abuse of power and one I never thought I’d take.

I mean, I wasn’t entirely wrong. Her leaving before the end of the test should have been an instant disqualification but it wasn’t exactly a governed test, just a class one and I’ve seen teachers make exceptions loads of time for students who had to leave but... knowing she was leaving to see him just did something to me.

It’s ridiculous of me to try to justify it but it’s exactly what I did.

The thing is, I don’t even dislike the guy. When I met him, yeah I was surprised he was so different from his brother but he still seemed nice enough and Hope clearly liked him, kids tend to have better instincts than adults so I trust her impression.

I was absolutely fine until I saw the way he looked at her.

I know that look, I’ve given her that look, the look you give a girl you already know you’re going to fall in love with.

Brie had never made it a secret she was going to date other guys and I thought I was good with that. I thought they’d be like that security guard outside the club the night we met or that fucking Italian guy she worked for, guys who looked at her like she was a piece of meat and one day she’d just grow bored of and would pick the life I could give her instead.

That wasn’t what I saw that day though. He didn’t look at her like all he was seeing was her surface, he looked at her like he wanted to explore her soul, the way I did... the way I do... or do I?

The thing with Meg, finding out they were... together. It had fucked me up.

I tried really hard not to hate Meg, she was my daughter’s mother and I had loved her so dearly once, but every time I ever had to deal with her my skin felt like it was being rubbed with acid. Everything about her made me sick to my stomach, finding out Brie had let herself be with someone like that... it hurt. It shouldn’t have, it was so unfair of me to put that on her, but it was how it felt.

Since then I feel like I just can’t stop making mistakes and I can see they’re hurting Brie too. We still connect, fuck every time I see her my heart still leaps into my throat, but there’s a hesitancy there that wasn’t there before.

Finding out about her past, the things she had to do to take care of her family, only made me respect her that much more, it made the way she views the world make more sense too. I accepted it was who she was, but then so much more kept adding to it I wasn’t even sure what I was searching for in her anymore.

That day she kissed me by the pool, I told her I didn’t want to change her, but there is a part of me that wants to make things better for her. Is she happy with this life? Truly happy?

‘Dad, I’ve got to go back stage and get ready... Beebee will be here? Right?’

Hope has missed her and I know that’s my fault too. I was afraid to see her and I kept them apart, that was wrong.

‘Of course she will, May is probably running late. You go, I’ll be sitting right here.’

Hope scurries off through the curtain, her ringlets bouncing in their bunches with every skip. I have to fix this, I have to fix it for her sake too.

I look around again but she’s still not here.

“Connor? Hi, is Hope coming back or can I sit here?”

Looking up I see Aniston looking down at me, her arms free of the twins that are usually hanging off her. They’re a handful but I actually love kids like that, I’d rather them running around like lunatics loving life than too scared to make a noise.

“I think I’ve lost her to the backstage chaos. Of course you can have it.”

She sits down, her delicate fingers accidently brushing against mine as she tries to hurry into the seat and I can see the blush creeping up her neck as she attempts to pretend she has something she desperately needs from her bag.

She’s cute, actually she’s more than fucking cute. I don’t understand how that guy left her, she’s such a good person. I try to help out where I can, I know she struggles with two partially deaf hyperactive kids on her hands but she seems to take it all in her stride.

I was actually grateful to Aniston, she kept me sane on the school run when the P.T.A. bunny’s would come sniffing around. There was a time when I actually considered asking her out, but it became clear she had enough on her plate with her kids and I didn’t want to add to it.

Things seem calmer for her now though. I wish I could say the same for me.

“Fiona’s group doing a performance?”

She smiles up at me, such a beautiful smile. When I first came to the school I hadn’t realised the girl leading Brie’s old dance troop was Aniston’s sister, then at Hope’s party the pieces came together.

“Not her group but the group of young teenagers she teaches are on at the end. The twins want to start in her young learners class but I think she might kill me if I make her teach them on the only evenings she gets away from the pair. She thinks I’m mental to want more, her worst fear is ending up with more than one. Twins kind of run in the family.”

More kids. That’s the other thing.

I never really thought it would be an issue to only have Hope, I always figured if I got to a certain age and it hadn’t happened I’d be good with that, but ever since Brie made me clear that it wasn’t something she wanted it’s all I can think about. I was an only child, so is Meg, I think one of the things that bonded us together so much was the feeling of growing up and being really lonely. I didn’t want that for Hope.

There was just no reason for it, Brie was unbelievable with kids. I’d watched her with May and Hope, even the way she was so nurturing towards Aleah and her pregnancy. Was it just another wall I could bring down if I tried hard enough?

Or was I trying to make her someone she’s not?

“PSSST! ANI!”

I look over to the side of the stage and see Fiona’s floating head popping through the thick black velvet curtains.

Aniston looks over and rolls her eyes.

“Shit, that’s her ‘the twins just broke something’ eyes. Can you watch my stuff”

I laugh before grabbing her bag and putting it on her seat. “Yeah I’ve got it, you go.”

She runs and disappears into the curtain. Were her jeans always that tight? Or have I just never noticed how good her ass is before?

Damn it Connor. This is really not the time to be checking out the hot single mums.

I look around to see the hall is almost completely full now, when suddenly a tiny head of chocolate curls rushes past my seat on the way to the curtain.

“Hey Green eyes!”

Does everyone just call me that now?

“May!”

That voice. I don’t even have to turn, I just blink and there she is. May runs back to her and takes the bag from her hand but I hardly notice her in the presence of this glorious amazon.

She notices me but makes a point of ignoring my presence, I can’t blame her.

“Bri-”

I don’t get a chance to finish before she walks over to the other side of the hall and takes a seat next to her grandmother and Jayce, both of whom offer me kind smiles that tell me she hasn’t informed them of how I fucked up.

She’s pissed though, her whole body turning so she doesn’t even have to face me.

I try not to stare, keeping an eye on what’s in front of me but I can’t stop my eyes travelling back to where she sits. Apparently every other guy in here is doing the same thing as she stands, bending over to take some money from Aleah and letting every inch of her legs show in those tight shorts.

It’s like four degrees outside, how does she still look so effortless? She must be freezing. Glancing around it takes everything in me not to chuckle at all the guys now getting evils from their girlfriends, having been caught staring at her.

She starts to walk away and I watch Aleah stand. “Get some Cheetos too! The hot ones!”

Brie just shoves her middle finger up as she makes her way towards the vending machines in the foyer.

This is my chance.

Aniston smiles as she drops back into her seat. “Emergency averted, they really shouldn’t make those fire hoses so easily accessible... You okay Con?”

I have to talk to her.

“Um yeah, I’m just going to get a snack, you want anything?”

She smiles. “Coke please? Wait, I’ve got money.”

“No, it’s okay, I’ve got it.”

I race up the steps towards the doors at the back, the foyer completely clear except for the beauty of a woman in front of me.

Brie stands, juggling three cans of coke, two giant bags of chips and attempting to lean down to retrieve the third.

I slide in next to the machine and pull them out of the flap. I try to hand them to her but she just snatches them out of my hand and tries to shove past me.

“Brie, can we talk?”

“No.”

She doesn’t stop, marching towards the doors again.

“Brie!”

She continues to ignore me. She’s so stubborn. If I let her go back in there she’ll do a runner before the show is over and I won’t get a chance to talk to her.

Noticing the dance classroom next to her is open and empty I take advantage of her flustered state as she attempts to open the door with one free hand, grabbing her by the elbow and pulling her inside.

“Connor! What the fuck?!”

I slam the door closed behind us.

“I’m sorry.”

She scoffs. “For which part? Shoving me in here against my will or threatening to fail me for going to see someone in the hospital?”

I walk over, taking the cans and chips from her arms and placing them down on the benches.

“Both. Look Brie, I’m sorry for all of it. I let my emotions get the best of me, that’s not an excuse it’s just what happened. I would never have failed you, the test mediator thought I should because that’s the schools policy but I explained the situation. I should never have tried to stop you leaving, that isn’t who I am and I’m really sorry I behaved like that.”

She still has up that front like she hates me but I know she doesn’t, not really.

“Is Steve okay now?”

He shoulders begin to relax, I don’t know if it was the mention of his name or just that she’s glad I asked. “Yeah, he actually got out a few days ago... Look Con, I understand why it bothered you, I really do. I just don’t understand why you didn’t say anything sooner. If you’d asked me, I would’ve told you. I’ve never hid anything from you and-”

“I know, I should have. I’m sorry.”

I was just too scared to hear the answer. I was too scared to hear that you were finally ready for something, it just wasn’t with me.

We stand there quietly for a second, I’m not sure what to do from here...

“Oh for fucks sake, stop it with the puppy dog eyes. Come here you dickhead.”

She steps forward and pulls me into her arms, her body pushed against mine as I wrap myself around her. Thank fuck for that.

There’s something about being around Brie, she’s like walking light and you can’t stop yourself from basking in her. Even the coconut shampoo I can tell she used this morning smells so much better on her than it ever would on anyone else.

I keep her in my arms, terrified at any second she’ll change her mind and walk away from me again. I don’t want to lose her.

“I’m so sorry Brie.” I speak directly down to her as I rest my chin on the top of her head. “I just didn’t know if I could ask, things just haven’t been the same with us since...”

“Meg.” She replies into my chest, the vibrations of her lips channelling through the fabric of my shirt. “Things are different now aren’t they? We’re even different from the people we were when this started between us. I’m not sure things can be the same Connor.”

“I want them to be...”

I’m just not sure they can.

We stand there for another minute, me soaking in the feeling of her against me once more. I’m not sure where we go from here, I just know I don’t want to be without her. Not talking to her, not being able to have her near me, it hurts.

“I have to go back, Hope’s on first.”

She nods against my chest before pulling back. I gather up the chips and cans for her, some of which she takes from me with a smile.

“You got a lot of stuff for just the four of you.”

Brie laughs. “Babe this is just for Al, she wanted four cokes but they only had three left.”

I open the door and she goes through, the lights lowering as we enter the hall.

“Oh shit, I was supposed to get a coke for Aniston.”

Brie takes the chips from me and hands them over to Aleah, passing two of the cokes to Jayce and giving me the third.

“Give her this one.” Aleah growls at her, making Jayce laugh and Granny offer me a look of sympathy. “Oh shut up, you hormonal wench. Eat your damn chips and let the guy have a fucking coke.”

Damn, I’ve missed her.

She smiles, glancing over to where Aniston is looking up at us and waving at her.

Turning back, she winks at me. “Go get her good boy.”

Oh god does she think? Me and... I mean I’m not completely against the idea but... aren’t things complicated enough?

Taking a step back to my seat her voice calls me back.

“CON!” I turn around to be greeted by that awe-inspiring smile. “Merry Christmas.”

She’s something else.

I smirk at her. “Merry Christmas bad girl.”

Her smirk matches my own.

“Damn right I am, don’t you forget it.”

As if I ever could.

I settle back down in my seat, passing the coke to Aniston who glows bright red as her fingertips brush against my own. She really is fucking cute.

The curtains open to reveal my little princess, her smile lighting up the stage better than any spotlight ever could. She spots me immediately then starts scanning the crowd, not having to look far for her favourite person as Brie stands waving her arms like a crazy person to get her attention.

Hope’s body vibrates as she fills with excitement at the sight of her.

“Connor, you have the cutest kid I think I’ve ever seen.” Aniston whispers in my ear. I smile down at her but she’s just starring up at Hope as the music begins and the class start the routine Hope has shown me fifty times already in her own little living room performances.

I’m the luckiest guy on the fucking planet, no matter what happens with any other woman in my life, I’ll always have the most perfect little girl right by my side.

My eternal hope.

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