Double Star.

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18: Ashley.

PoV Ashley:

- “I’m going out, mom! “. I screamed putting my shoes on, near the outside door.

- “You have work ?“. My mom looked at me from behind her door with messed hair, dressed with a light purple dress on her body and scratching her eyes. She seemed half sleepy cause she just woke up from her little nap.

- “No, I just want to have a walk “. She shrugged as an answer, didn’t seem to want to know more.

-« Don’t come late, you have work tomorrow ». She said while yawning and stretching her body then went back to her darkroom, weakly enlightened.

The fresh evening air made me feel free and soothed. With my headphones on, I enjoyed these rare moments of calm and serenity.

I didn’t know where to put myself lately and a good evening stroll might help me to get my thoughts straight.

After 20 minutes of walking, I finally reached the beach. I sat on the golden dry and thin sand, feeling thebite of the sand-charged wind and admiring the sun which was almost setting.

No one’s here at this late time, everything’s quiet and the only sound we can hear is the melody of the waves moving forward to caress the cold sand slowly and continuously, then going back, not forgetting to leave its wet mark behind.

In this mid-October, the atmosphere reflects perfectly the season of maples with blazing leaves, the mixture of cloudy rainy and sometimes even snowy weather, and beautiful sunny and mild days at the same time.

I got my knees closer to my chest and surrounded them with my arms. The sun began to hide behind the edge of the horizon and the sea was dancing slowly under the gentle rhythm of the wind, coming to stroke my face again and giving me incessant shivers. Nature is wonderful in all its forms, you just have to know how to listen to it, contemplate it.

I closed my eyes looking back over all the good and bad memories I shared with dad and...Daphne.

Flashback 4 years ago:

-“Dad, look ! It’s a dolphin !“. I screamed in surprise. Dad holding Daphne between his arms was looking at the aquatic animals with the same admiring gaze as mine.

To celebrate the arrival of my dad after a long absence, the father of Noelle, considered as one of the best friends of my dad, invited us to the inauguration of his new park, classified as the most waited aquatic park in the country, now.

Even Daphne, who has been recently diagnosed suffering from ADHD, seemed to be giving some attention to the dolphin doing incredible acrobatic moves.

-“So how do you find it ?“. Mikael, the owner of the place and the father of my best friend Noelle got closer to us with a big smile on his face.

-“It’s wonderful, Mike! Thanks for the invitation”.

-“You’re welcome my friend, it’s a pleasure to have you here with us after a long time...Where is Brooklyn? “. He held the hand of my father and smiled at me.

-“Didn’t want to come, she didn’t feel good this morning but she told me to greet you and thank you for your invitation and she’s sorry for not coming”.

-“It’s okay, she can come whenever she wants, you’re our special guests”. Mike smiled at my father warmly and dad nodded.

-“So how’s Noelle ? I heard from Ashley that she’s not good with living far from you, especially when Karen decided to get married again”. Mikael sighed looking sad.

-“What can I possibly do for her? I tried to win her guard but her mother didn’t leave me any option, she’s my beloved daughter and I love her but maybe that’s the best thing to do. The most important thing is that she’s in safe and living good, you know, Karen always treated me like a good for nothing so I started to believe it”. He laughed nervously and scratched his head.

-” Don’t say that...You know women are always unsatisfied, whatever you do they will always complain about nothing, and...“. Dad looked around him stupefied.

-“Look where you are now, you finally reached your goal, I’m so proud of you !“. Dad smiled at Mikael and he smiled back thanking him.

-“So...and you Bryan ? When will you resign from the military, the last time I saw you were years ago, we are missing you here”. Mikael winked at me and caressed the head of my sister.

-“I’m still young you know, I’m just 36”. My dad smiled nervously and stood up straight to carry Daphne correctly.

-” Bryan...“. He sighed.

-“Look, I know you since I did my military service with you, for about 18 years from now and I think you should leave your rank. Why don’t you try another life? I bet your family is dying to have you near them”. He looked at me and I smiled sadly. I brought this subject so many times, begging him to stay with us and the answer was always the same.

-“I don’t want to talk about it”. My dad looked down.

-“Bryan...please, think again, we completed The Draft together, I chose another life but you decided to continue this path of war and I think it’s time to...“.

-” I SAID I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THAT !“. My dad screamed so loud that the employers came to see what was going on.

-“Let’s go, Ashley !“. Dad pulled me by the arm strongly leaving Noelle’s father with his confused sorry face.

Once in our small house, dad hurried to open a bottle of alcohol to take refuge there and clean his brain from all the dark ideas that were haunting him since his youth, which brought on another fight with my mom.

Their relationship was tenuous and hung only by a thread for years now.

-” Another bottle ? Seriously ?“. She almost screamed. The principal reason for my mom not coming to any trip family with us is my “dad”.

From the little we see him, he’s always holding a bottle of liquor in his hand and that changed him so much.

My mom seeing me from behind the wall listening to their fight, slammed the door in my face. But the tone of their voices rose so quickly that I didn’t even need the door to be opened to hear them.

-” YOU THINK THAT I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING BEHIND MY BACK ?“. I could hear the sound of the burst of the bottle on the ground, thrown violently by my dad.


-“MOM !“. I hurried to open the door to find my mom on the ground, grunting with pain, and the kitchen becoming a completely messed up room. My dad continued to throw everything that was on his way, the bottles, dishes, glasses, making his anger and my fear grow more and more.

-“FAMILY? HUSBAND? DO YOU REALLY THINK I CAN TAKE A WHORE LIKE YOU FOR A WIFE ?! WE’RE NOT MARRIED AND WE WILL NEVER, YOU LISTENING ?! I’LL NEVER MARRY A BITCH THAT SPREAD HER LEGS FOR HALF OF MY FRIENDS!“. My dad got closer to my mom who was on the ground twisting, being unable to bear with the pain, and took her wildly by her cheeks. I felt my breath becoming heavier and I looked at my dad with full tears in my eyes, not recognizing him anymore. What happened to him so suddenly? He never rose his tone like that. Usually, he’s calm, never gets angry, and smiles all the time but seeing him lose control like that is the most terrifying scene I’ve ever seen.

-“Did you think that having kids with me could change your status to me? No, you were a fucking whore the day I met you, and still are you! What even proves that those kids are mine? After all that you did, I think I was very patient with you Brook but this time I’m not accepting you taking me for a fool again...“. My dad whispered in the ear of my mom and released her face brutally making it red from the pressure of his strong hand. Mom was terrified and shocked by the sudden change of humor of my dad, probably never seeing him like that before, but unable to respond to him because of the ache and the fear. As for me, nothing could describe the pain I felt at that time, hurt by his words. How could he doubt the fact that Daphne and I are his daughters?

-“Dad...“. I said in a low voice with tears flowing down my cheeks. He turned suddenly to see me and his expression turned from anger to sorrow, he looked at me for a moment sadly and got up to leave.

-“Ashley...“. He sighed, clenching his fists and looking down.

-“I’m sorry, Ash’...“. He whispered putting his hand on my head delicately.

Those were his last words to me ever, before he left us. After that I never heard from him again, he didn’t respond to any of my calls or letters like he used to. Authorities said that he returned serving in the Army Special Forces and that there were high chances that he had died in Afghanistan, leaving his body unfound.


Summer has come and passed

The innocent can never last

Wake me up when September ends

Like my father’s come to pass

Seven years has gone so fast

Wake me up when September ends

Here comes the rain again

Falling from the stars

Drenched in my pain again

Becoming who we are

As my memory rests

But never forgets what I lost

Wake me up when September ends

Summer has come and passed

The innocent can never last

Wake me up when September ends

Ring out the bells again

Like we did when spring began

Wake me up when September ends

Here comes the rain again

Falling from the stars

Drenched in my pain again

Becoming who we are

As my memory rests

But never forgets what I lost

Wake me up when September ends

Summer has come and passed

The innocent can never last

Wake me up when September ends

Like my father’s come to pass

Twenty years has gone so fast

Wake me up when September ends

Wake me up when September ends

Wake me up when September ends


I put my violin on the cold floor when I finished singing my favorite song “Wake Me Up When September Ends” by Green Day, waiting for the comment of my little sister.

-“So, what do you think ?“. She smiled at me innocently and I hugged her.

-“It was beautiful, Ash’ !“. The only moment she gave me some attention is when I sing and play with my favorite instrument to her and in difficult times like this, music and her are my only escape.

One month passed since my father left us, and every time a man passed out the door of our apartment, the hope that it would be him smiling at us, screaming “I’m Back !” like he always did when he returns, is still burning in my heart. And god knows how many men crossed that door.

When my dad left, mom regained her old habit, bringing a different man to the house each night.

-” Ashley my dear, come here !“. I was a little surprised that she would ask me to come when she had a “guest” and why would she call me “my dear” in front of someone while she never shared any word or act of affection with me or my sister when we’re alone?

-“Daphne, I’ll be right back”. She just nodded looking elsewhere, anxious. I kissed her on her forehead and joined my mom in the living room.

-“Ashley, this is David, he was absolutely amazed by your voice and he wanted me to introduce you to him”. My mom stood behind me with her ten centimeters heels and put her hand on my back. I stared at the unknown man, not understanding why I was here, he was tall, had green light eyes, and looked like a rich man with his well-dressed black suit.

-“That’s right Ashley. By the way, you’re a gorgeous girl!“. He smiled at me in a way I couldn’t describe and I didn’t know why I felt insecure at this moment. He looked at my mom, then a smug smile on his face appeared.

-“You’re going to save us, Ashley. You won’t be useless like the moron of your dad”. My mom whispered to me and when I turned to see her if she was being serious, the same self-satisfied smirk that was on the lips of this strange man was traced on hers too. And that’s when I finally figure out why I was feeling unsafe the whole time.

Mom sold her fourteen-year-old virgin daughter to this man called “David”.

-“And the guitar that you’re making horrible noises with, you should get rid of it, stop playing your childish songs, you’re a grown woman now !“. She faced me, holding me by my shoulders and looking at me with her witch eyes, with a long line of eyeliner traced above them.

-“It’s not a guitar, it’s a violin and it’s a gift from dad! I can’t lose it!“. I said with a determined look but she smiled at me, looking amused by my talk.

-“Another reason to get rid of it. David, do you have someone who plays ″Vio-Lin″ in your family? Or whatever, I’m giving it to you, you can throw it if you don’t want to have your ears cracked like mine”. She laughed sadistically and I wanted to scream at her so bad and tell her that she’s the worst mother ever but I stayed silent holding my tears from exploding on my face, hoping that this man standing in front of me will have more pity for me than my own mother and won’t take the last thing I have from my father.

-” That’s a good thing cause my son knows how to play it, I’m sure he would be very honored to have the violin of a musician like your daughter, right Ashley ?“. He said with irony. I didn’t answer, I felt my world crumbling, my heart aching but the silent tear falling slowly down my face was the only manifestation of distress that my motionless carcass could express, yet I predicted that even if I indulged in my own dismay and gave utterance to my great fear, it wouldn’t be enough to shake their ruthless immorality cause, I was trapped in my mom’s evil world and something in me was telling me that this wasn’t the worst cause I would be trapped in this man’s world very soon too.

-“Ex-musician, please”. Mom scurried to add. They burst into laughter together and that was the most awful sound I could’ve ever heard, to add to my pain, mom circled her arm around my waist and pulled me closer to her. I lost half of me that day but the light of hope in me didn’t extinguish, at least, not at that moment.

Weeks later, seeing the doubtful behavior of my mom, she has been denied access to her young child, Daphne, placed in a household for children. And that’s when I lost the other half of me knowing the hope that I was clinging to for so long was no longer here, anymore.

End of the flashback.

Remembering all those horrible times, four years ago, is making me have a horrible headache but at least I don’t have any tears left to cry, just an empty heart that only the sorrow could fulfill sometimes.

As the sun announced its departure, I started to get cold, I cursed myself instantly for not putting something warmer than a hoodie and a short in a cold season.

-“Ashley ?“. A voice that I knew so well made me startle.

-” Edward ?! What are you doing here ?“.

-“It’s me who should ask you this question, for your information I live here!“.

-“I just wanted to take some fresh air, I was suffocating at home”. I smiled at him friendly and he just nodded and sat next to me, watching the unforgettable, flamingo pink sunset.

A soothing silence settled between us and I thank him for that, Edward is a calm and wise man, doesn’t rush or force things, inspires confidence and maturity. The first time I met him was a year and a half ago, he saved me from a bad guy and since then we became good friends. He knows what I’m doing, but never dared to say anything about it.

-“So how’s life going ?!“. He asked looking at me.

-“Good...Now that you’re here”. I smiled at him and he gave me a suspicious glance.

-“What does that mean ?“. He raised an eyebrow.

-“Nothing...It’s just that ...“.

-“That?“. He looked at me curiously and I forced myself not to laugh.

-“I feel like I have that gay friend that shows himself whenever I don’t feel good”. He blinked several times before understanding what I said. He stood up suddenly, wiping his jean from the sand, and severely glanced at me.

-“Get up !“.

-“Huh ?“.

-” I want you to get up !“.

-“And I want some chips and ketchup, please”. Seeing him glaring at me and not smiling made me think that he was not joking so I did as he told me and suddenly I felt my body lifted and in a second I found myself thrown into the seaside.

-“Asshole !“. I found myself completely wet while the dumb boy was laughing his ass off.

-“You should’ve seen your face, I swear you looked like a shrimp”. He kept laughing at me like a fucking idiot like he was having the time of his life.

-“Damn, you’re such a funny man!“. I rolled my eyes. Seeing me offended by his act, he got closer to me and gave me his hand to get up but I took the opportunity to take my revenge and pushed him down into the water.

-“Who’s the shrimp now ?“. He glared at me for a second then we burst into laughter at the same time.

-“I may look like a shrimp but I’m not gay”. His face was so close to mine that I could’ve seen the droplets of water on his sunken cheeks in the dark.

-“I know”. I run my fingers through his wet brown curls, making him look so cute with messed hair.

-“That would be a waste if you were gay”. I was examining every feature of his angelic face and he gave me his suspicious look again then throw himself into the water.

-“I’m waiting eagerly for the day that you’ll talk explicitly”. He fixed the night sky thoughtfully and I chuckled.

-“Never”. I got closer to his face and looked deep into his hazel eyes. Damn, for a shrimp, he’s very handsome!

He shared his gaze with me confidently and my eyes went down unconsciously to his lips.

-“Get up or you will catch a cold”. I said, arranging a lock of my hair that was bothering me, still looking into his eyes.

-“Since when does a shrimp catch a cold ?“. I rolled my eyes.

-“You’re not a shrimp, you’re an idiot but obviously not a shrimp”. The smirk that appeared on his face made my heart jump for a second.

-“So you’re saying that I am handsome indirectly, right ?“. Oh god, he’s finally revealing his British accent, I’m melting.

-“Mmmm...Right ! You finally understand my implied, I should be careful with what I say now”. I caressed his nose with my wet finger then went down gently to his lips, so well drawn. Seeing him concentrate on what I was doing, I pushed his head in the water and got up sneering.

-“Biiiiiiiitch !“. He said, head still on the cold water.

- “Let’s go, I’ll take you home”. He got up all wet moving his head to remove the water from his hair and face and I couldn’t help looking at his muscled chest, almost naked because of his wet white t-shirt, sticking to his skin.

- “I know the way, you know! “. I said with an amused tone.

- “I know, but it would be quite a waste if a pretty young lady like you walked alone in the middle of the night”. Here we go again with his British accent, he bowed and took my hand to drop a small delicate kiss on it, as a gentleman, and I pretended to be touched by his action.

His hand and lips were as cold as warm and I couldn’t help but smile at his stupidity which, yet, has saved my day.


We shared the way home, silently. The wind blow made me shudder and my wet clothes did not help at all.

Carefully, I felt someone placing what appeared to be a jacket over my shoulders.

- “Fortunately, I thought about removing it before sitting next to you”.

- “What a smart gentleman you can be !“. I smiled.

- “No, it’s just that I know what to expect when I’m with you”. He smiled back making my heart bounce for the second time.

-” WATCH OUT !“. Edward pulled me strongly by the arm, and a car stopped abruptly in front of us.

- “Wow ! Look who’s having fun with the enemy, the whore of the year felt herself sprouting wings, apparently ! “. Oh my God! I felt my blood freezing when I saw the driver of the car. From all the people that are living in this fucking city, it must be him that I see here.

- “Matthew! “. Ed whispered with rage in his voice. The man sneered at Edward who was not enjoying this meeting since he was glaring at Matthew with killing eyes.

- “I see that I’m pretty famous here”. He continued to provoke Edward with his smirk, as for me I couldn’t take my eyes off him, my legs are begging me to fall so much I can’t stand correctly. If he tells David that I was hanging out with one of the “Outlaws”, that would be the end of me. Suddenly his gaze turned to me, and he scrutinized me up and down with his disgust glare.

- “It wasn’t enough for you to fuck with all of us, you had to open your legs for our fucking opponents too ! You have some damn nerve to do that, dirty Slut !“. He said harshly. I swallowed his words with difficulty, I don’t even dare to look at Edward so much I’m ashamed of myself...

- “Get in !“. He ordered with an authoritative tone. I looked at him scared of what he was going to do and executed his order without a word but Edward grabbed my arm.

When my eyes met his’, I wanted to bury myself alive. He was clenching his fist and his eyes reflected the great anger he felt. I wanted to cry so much I was ashamed, but I restrained myself. Instead, I preferred to break our eye contact and removed my arm that was hurting me because he grabbed it powerfully.

-” Sorry”. I took off his jacket and passed it to him, but he didn’t take it, letting it hit the floor quickly. The look of deception he gave me right after, made me regret having any contact with him.

-“I SAID GET INSIDE THE FUCKING CAR !“. Matthew screamed, losing his patience and my heart almost skipped a beat from the fear.

I circumvented the car to sit in the front seat silently... without looking back. Matthew accelerated instantly, and the few words that he will share with me for the rest of the drive made me regret leaving my damn house.

- “You don’t interest him, poor girl. All he wants is to fuck you and make you even dirtier than you already are”. This time I couldn’t keep those damn tears from falling!

“Sorry, dad...”

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