Drowning Love

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Summary

Paige a young mum of two having to start over again, can she find love again or will her past come back in the shape of her ex? Oh, for the love of god, why do these children take a million years to get out of the front door? I am going to be late opening the shop. "Come on you two! Mummy is going to be late!" zipping up both of their bags as Amber yells out from her bedroom, "Have you seen my shoes mum?!" I want to bang my head on the counter, "You had them on your feet like two minutes ago?!" It's going to be one of those mornings. Jaxson yells out from the bathroom, "MUMMY I PEED MY PANTS AGAIN!" **This is my original works, originally published on Chapters. Any attempts to recreate it will be reported and seeking legal action.**

Genre:
Romance / Drama
Author:
R.A.Haigwood
Status:
Complete
Chapters:
30
Rating:
4.8 5 reviews
Age Rating:
18+

Chapter 1: The Nut House

Oh, for the love of God, why do these children take a million years to get out of the front door? I am going to be late opening the shop. “Come on you two! Mummy is going to be late!” zipping up both of their bags as Amber yells out from her bedroom, “Have you seen my shoes mum?” I want to bang my head on the counter, “You had them on your feet like two minutes ago?!” It’s going to be one of those mornings. Jaxson yells out from the bathroom, “MUMMY I PEED MY PANTS AGAIN!” Whippers to myself, “Fucking hell, again?! Why is it so hard for boys to pee?” I say out louder, “Please tell me you pulled your pants down first before going to the toilet?!” I had my fingers crossed, “Kinda!”

I raced off back down the hall towards the bathroom, finding him standing in front of the toilet pee everywhere. Bloody hell why is toilet training boys so dam hard? I quickly pick him up placing him in the bathtub washing him again, while throwing his kindy clothes into the wash. I wrap a towel around my toddler while picking him up and racing back into his room to get him back into his kindy uniform. “Amber, have you found your shoes yet?” Please be dressed by the time I finish with your brother. “Yes, mummy I have!” Thank god, dressing my son as fast as I can. “Amber, can you take your brother and wait at the front door for me please!” I quickly raced into the bathroom cleaning up the pee as quickly as I can before racing out the front door to get the kids into the car. When did my life become such a shit storm?

I head on off to the children’s school, looking at the clock on my dash crap I have five minutes to drop them off and get to work on time, never going to make it. Managed to get a park near the school, unbuckling both kids out of their car seats as we raced on off towards Jaxson’s kindy room. Signing him in, put his bag and lunch away I quickly give him a kiss on his cheek and a quick hug before racing off. “Bye Jaxson, I love you buddy.”

“Bye mummy and Amber I love you.” He quickly takes off to play with his friends, I grab his sister’s hand and take off towards her year one classroom. She puts her bag away pulling out her fruit snack and water bottle as she races inside leaving, her book bag and her homework bag for me to grab again, I caught her teachers’ eye as I drop her bags off pulling out her sight words book, reading book and homework book in the baskets as her teacher makes her way over towards me.

A pretty right out of university teacher, I have no complaints about her at all, she looks young and fresh for the students, “Hi Paige, how are you today?” I smile at her, I do not have time for this, “Sorry Miss Wood, I am running late for work again. Can we pick this up in the afternoon?” She gives me a sad look, “Sorry it cannot wait.” Oh, this doesn’t look good, “What has happened?” She pulls me aside away from the other parents near us, “I feel like you should know that yesterday Amber was telling the class that her dad died in a car crash that is why he is never around.”

What the hell? That is not true at all, I stood there looking shocked as hell at her.

“That is not true at all, he is very much alive. He moved down south and doesn’t come up at all to visit them. Maybe to her, his died.” I feel horrible having to say this about their father, hate what he’s done to this family. “Ok, maybe when your home with her tell her that telling those type of stories is not nice. She does have a classmate who has just lost his mum it had upset him too.” I covered my mouth in shock, “Oh my, yes, I will get right on it. I am so sorry she did that. I really need to go. Bye Amber!” I called out to her, “Yeah cya, mum!”

I raced off towards my car and headed off towards the bakery hoping with all hope that my staff is good. Parking in my normal spot as I see that we are open and all looks good from the front, thank god I really wish I could get the kids in before and after school care more than I have them in now. Only two days a week for this is not enough it needs to be what I had asked which was five days for the pair of them. This is really starting to hurt me business-wise. “Harper, how has the morning been love?” Harper looks up from the cake she was icing, with a big smile on her face. “Hi Paige, all is well here. I see those kids of yours had fun with you this morning.”

I look down at myself then back up at her with shock on my face arms up in the air, crap. Still, in my PJs I had forgotten to get dress, did my hair and makeup, and put my shoes on but forgotten to change, crap! I went into the school dressed like this! “Check your office you might have a spare set of clothes to get into.” I nodded my head thinking I sure hope so because I don’t even have a bra on, I race into my office looking around nothing I have nothing; I race back out to Harper. “Harper can you please watch the shop while I go home and get dressed.”

“Sure!” She yelled out trying to hide her laughter, I raced towards my car and headed off back home to get dress. A good twenty minutes later I was back at work wearing my work clothes this time, Harper was out front talking to a customer about an order they want to place while I headed on back to see what needed to be made and what my head baker had worked on today.

My life was not always this crazy, I was married a year ago to the man of my dreams or so I thought, I had married my high school boyfriend Phoenix Lake. I know he wouldn’t have moved so fast if I wasn’t pregnant with Amber at the time, we may have lasted if we had taken our time. Oh, who am I kidding he fell into his co-worker’s pussy and never got out of it. Leaving me with a one-year-old and a three-year-old to raise by myself, we officially divorced last year also that was the last time we three had seen him. I keep getting mad at myself for still having part of me in love with him, he was my first boyfriend. Not the first boy I had slept with though, but the first that had me hooked, and fallen madly in love with him.

Why did he sleep with her?

Wasn’t I enough for him?

Why have children with me if you don’t want to see or hear from them?

Why is he like this towards us?

Why marry me if you’re going to end up doing this a few years later?

If I hadn’t walked into his work to give him a sample of a new product I wouldn’t have known as he showered us with love like he always had, no signs of him wanting another life.

Did we have our children too early in our life?

We still managed to work around the children he went to university for business accounting, I went and got my apprenticeship as a pastry chef. We both saved up enough for us to get a loan to buy the house that I am in, and later on enough to start renting out this shop front, that I now own after the divorce I used some of that money to get a loan to buy it, with the help from my parents as well.

“Oi Paige, we need more choc mint cupcakes please!” Harper yells out from the front, “Oh, crap sorry Harper.” I raced out the back fridge pulling out the choc mint cupcakes, finished them off before heading out the front to top up the cabinet. I smiled at my staff and customers as I filled the shelves. I head back into the kitchen prepping for tomorrow and later today before I knew it was time to pick up the children. I looked over at Harper who was cleaning up her section I feel bad doing this to her. “Ok Paige, hear me out. I know you are having major mummy guilt and boss guilt and friend guilt right now. But I am ok being here for the twenty minutes it takes you to pick up the little cutie pies and I am also happy to play with them until we close.”

I go to open my mouth. “Also, you are one of my closest friends and I love you, which makes it so much easier working under you. I also love your cute kids and they love me. Now go get them I am fine.” She said softly, “Thank you, love, I will be right back.” I said fast, “Why don’t you ask your parents to help you out more often or even” I cut her off, “Don’t even say his name, Harper.” I snapped, “Ok, I won’t.”

I left to get the kids; I wish I could have my parents help me but they work during the hours that I need the help. His parents are no good either, not after we separated, they blamed me for it, I trapped him in this marriage because I couldn’t keep my legs closed. That I didn’t treat him like a wife should treat a husband. That hurt a lot and he never once told them any different, they haven’t seen the kids since we told them this. I walked into Jaxson’s kindy, I can hear him yelling that’s my mum, it melts my heart every time. It hurts knowing that their dad is still hurting them by not being here for them. What did that girl have on him that would stop him from caring about his children?

I smiled at my son who had run into my arms. “Hey, my little man! How was your day?” I asked, “Hi mummy! Good!” He said very loudly, “Awesome sweetie let’s go get your big sister.” He lets out a loud groan, “Do we have to? She stinks” He grumbles, “Too bad for you, she is part of the family.” I said firmly, “Like dad is?” He asked, “Jax that is different.” I told him. “How so? He no longer sees me.” He looked so hurt, I held onto his little hand a little tighter. “I know baby.” We head on over towards the year one building as the school bell goes off, I see her running towards her bag shoving everything into her bag closing it, and taking off towards us with a big smile on her face.

“MUMMY!!!” Amber screamed out, “Hi Amber, how was your day?” She wraps an arm around my waist before looking at her little brother. “Hi Jax,” She said softly, “Amber.” He stated the two of them poked tongues at each other. “ENOUGH THE PAIR OF YOU! We are going back to the shop until we close now you two need to behave.” I ordered, “Yes, mum.” Amber replied, Jaxson didn’t say anything, I got them both into the car and headed on towards the shop hoping we hadn’t hit a rush yet. I walked in with the kids and it wasn’t that busy but the cabinet looked like we did get hit in the time I was away. “Harper, you good?”

“Yes, Paige I am good. How are my two favourite little kids today?” Harper asked, “Good” Amber said, “Move Amber I want my hug from Harper too!” Jaxson cried out, “Oh, you both can learn to wait.” Harper said, he stomped his foot and crossed his arms over his chest putting out his bottom lip, it hurt seeing that face he looks like his dad when he does that.

“Jaxson, learn to wait,” I said. Quickly washing my hands and getting to work while Harper and the kids played quietly out the back. Before I knew it, it was closing time I had sent Harper home early seeing as I had her coming in early for me. Tomorrow the kids go to PCYC so I don’t have to rush around and miss the opening, with my bakers arriving at one in the morning to start baking.

We arrived home not long after closing, the kids raced to the front door trying to beat each other which didn’t work too well for them as I hadn’t unlocked the door yet. Locking the car and closing the front gate as I head towards the front door gently pushing past the kids so I can unlock, once the door was unlocked they raced into the house dumping their bags on the kitchen counter and heading into their rooms. “Oi! Unpack your bags the pair of you now!” I called out to them.

I hear the pair of them yelling back their yes mum response and bolted out of their rooms and started unpacking their bags and putting their lunch boxes and water bottles next to the sink and raced on off back to their rooms. I opened the fridge and start cooking dinner, once we all ate the kids had their baths and I read them both a book each before putting the pair of them to bed. I did my normal tidying up of the house and having a shower, getting into clean pj’s after this morning I don’t want to wear those tonight. Finally got the chance to sit down and watch the new episode of Supernatural halfway into the show my phone went off, groaning I answer it knowing who it will be.

_-_-_-_Phone Call_-_-_-_

Paige: Ella what is it?

Ella: Are you watching it?

Paige: Yes, and why can’t you call me after it so I can watch it.

Ella: Just record it.

Paige: This is the only time I can watch it, Ella.

Ella: Or hit pause babe.

I hit pause as the show started back up from the ads.

Ella: Has Phoenix

I groaned out loud.

Paige: No, he hasn’t. Why would he? He walked out, he is the one that chose to break this family up.

Ella: You missed a part out.

Paige: And what was that?

Ella: He broke your heart.

Paige: Of course, he did, he breaks it every day as the kids do something new or special, he doesn’t get to see that. Or they ask for him or tell their class that he’s dead cause it’s easier to deal with than saying my daddy doesn’t love me anymore.

Ella: Oh, babe I wish I was in the same town as you to give you a hug!

Paige: Thanks babe, I need one.

Paige: Why wasn’t I enough for him?

Ella: Paige you didn’t do anything wrong, your hot as hell it was him something is wrong with him.

Paige: Why didn’t he love me enough? Was I a

Ella: Stop with those questions’ girl! When was the last time you got laid?

Paige: That morning that I had found him.

Ella: Right girl you need to go out for a hot night out and get yourself tapped!

Paige: Really people talk like that?

Ella: NO, I am not going to yell get fucked in this house with my roommates.

I laughed at her.

Paige: Well come back up for the weekend, you, Lilly, and Harper we can hit the town.

Ella: Yes! I will have to look at what time I can take off but I will text you!

Paige: You better.

Ella: You know I will, also better get going so we can watch this before we fall asleep.

Paige: Yes, night I love and miss you.

Ella: Same girl.

We hang up and I hit play, she was right I didn’t last long I had fallen asleep on the couch again. I miss her so much she moved away when Amber was two as she was transferred for work. I woke up a few hours later with the tv still on but with Jaxson poking me in the face. “Hey, little man what’s up?” I sleepily asked, “I had a bad dream mummy.” he cried, “Come here baby” I wrap my arms around his little body picking him up taking him back to my bed, giving him a kiss on the cheek laying him down next to me. “Sleep in this bed with mummy tonight.” I whispered, “Mummy?” he quietly asked, “Yeah?” I whispered back, “Why doesn’t daddy love me anymore?” He asked sounding so heartbroken, “Oh honey, I am sure daddy still loves you.” I told him, “No, he doesn’t, if he did, he would be seeing me or calling me on the phone.” He said, which he does have a point. “Oh, my baby boy come here.”

I held onto him as he cried on my chest, doing my best not to cry with him. Phoenix you’re an asshole for doing this to my babies, hurt me all you like but don’t hurt my babies, leaning over grabbing my phone, I sent off a text to him. Fuck it he should know that he’s hurting his kids, I may regret sending this.

_-_-_-_Text Message_-_-_-_

Paige: I hope you are proud of yourself your son Jaxson believes you no longer love him. Also, your daughter Amber is telling her friends that you are dead. #FATHEROFTHEYEAR Hurt me all you like Phoenix BUT STOP HURTING MY CHILDREN!

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Sharon Faulkner: Very very good story enjoyed it thoroughly

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itgottaberelly: This book just drew me in and once I started it I couldn’t stop!

itgottaberelly: This is the first novel I’ve read on here… It was captivating and I couldn’t stop reading! I hope to enjoy more of your work.

Ameya: It's so cool and amazing

Katya H: Honestly it was a great read, ignoring the spelling errors, name changes etc, it was fantastic! Such a refreshing story. Please take the time to correct the spelling and grammar and you will have a really great book on your hands, well done!

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