Chapter 70 - Time Goes On
It’s now the weekend of our baby boy’s first birthday party to say I’m not stressed out is a lie, but I’m so grateful I have Ava, Jose, and Justine helping me out. Sadly the party doesn’t fall on his birthday however, he did enjoy the Baby Yoda-themed cake smash. It was a fun-filled day even myself and Oliver got in on the cake smash session, we got the photo’s back a few days ago. We had gone and got a few printed off and a few blown up along with some printed and framed and wrapped up for our loved ones as gifts.
Oliver and Max have gone and taken all three boys out to the park down the road so us girls plus Jackson can prep. Well, more Jackson and Josephine are in the kitchen prepping food, I had outsourced the cake, cupcakes, and cookies to a local lady down the road. The cake is baby Yoda, cupcakes, and cookies are a mixture of star wars characters plus baby Yoda. While myself, Ava, and Justine are out in the backyard setting up the place.
I know throwing a party comes with a lot to do, but wow I so did not know how much for just a first birthday was involved, I only wanted just family and close friends. Oliver on the other hand would like some of Chris’s friends from the playgroup and in the street. I get his point but it’s a lot of people in our house am I ready to be around that many people?
Coming home after my grandma’s funeral is hard not having her around for her regular phone calls or facetime calls. Just not being able to call her up, she had become my second mum instead of my grandma. I haven’t liked large crowds or parties since I know it has only been a month but I did hope I would be a little bit more excited for my son’s birthday but it’s just a big fat reminder that she is not here.
"Tas! Babe, we have enough balloon’s stop blowing more up." Ava yelled out at me, "Uh? Oh shit sorry Ava." I mumbled, "Are you ok? Is it the twins?" She asked, "Nah they are ok babe." I told her, "Gran would be hitting the back of your head right now if she was here." She snapped at me giving me that look that her dad and mine do when they want to tell me off more, "You think?" I asked not wanting to believe her, "Yes, she used to say she lived a full life don’t pity the dead pity the living who are not living." Ava said with a big smile on her face. "I know she used to say it, but I swear she stole it from Harry Potter." I said laughing, "Knowing her trying to keep up with her granddaughters." Ava said.
Held the balloon for her while she tied ribbon to it. Justine walks up taking over for me as I start gagging fucking not again, bolting towards the bathroom rushing past Jackson and Oliver didn’t make it was sick right outside of the bathroom door. "You couldn’t make it to the bathroom little thing?" Jackson called out, I just looked at him in sheer shock, "Shut up Jackson!" Oliver snapped at Jackson, I just let out a cry and bottled into the bathroom as another round has hit. I know Oliver is at the doorway looking at me with worry. "I’m ok, where are the boys?" I asked, "Tuckered out in Christopher’s room. Don’t worry it’s just an early afternoon nap, we will wake them all up just before the party. Also, Lee and dad are not far off from arriving with all the stuff for a BBQ and alcohol for those who are staying for the nighttime fun." I groaned out, he lets out a loud sigh. "Not sending them home Tasmine." He snapped at me, before he left I yelled back at him. "MAYBE I DON’T WANT TO PARTY THE NIGHT AWAY!"
"We have already spoken about this Tasmine, not going to fight with you while we have family here. It would be good for you and everyone to catch up, please stop stressing it’s not good for the twins." He didn’t let me reply he walked off towards the laundry room to get the cleaning supplies while I stayed in the bathroom, I wished he just get it. I’m always running off to the loo to either vomit or pee I don’t want a house full of people for that long. I get that family wants to catch up but does our son’s birthday party have to turn into a big party?
Why does he think I’m stressing?
Also, should we be having the whole family here when she is not here?
"I know why you are picking a fight Tasmine and I’m not budging because you need it, I need it, our son needs it, everyone we love needs it. We need something good to look forward to and right now that is our boy turning one. After that, it will be the birth of our twins and then it will be Theo and Tina’s wedding and Max and Justine’s wedding. I know you miss her, I miss her too we all do but babe she would be so angry at you for not wanting to celebrate because of her not being here." Oliver said with a loud exasperated sigh, while he cleaned up my mess, I went to complain about him cleaning and he brushed me off, fixing myself up while he put the rubbish in the bin and the cleaning supplies back I went to leave the bathroom but he stood in the doorway looking at me with an unreadable look.
"Now Tassie you good?" He asked, "Got no choice, Oliver." I said, "Yes you do." He said trying not to sound upset, "You’re not giving me one!" I yelled at him, he grabs my hand walking us to our room, I spot Jackson coming over and Oliver waves him off, once I was in the room Oliver closes the door and locks it behind him. "I said I didn’t want to fight but you seem like that is all you want to do right now, ok let it all out then Tasmine." He snapped.
I didn’t say anything I just slapped him in the face he looked at me in shock, while I looked at him in shock then fear. "What the fuck?" He cried out in anger, he says this as he touched his face looking at me in shock, I took a step back unsure why I did that, he looked at me oddly when I had stepped back. "Unlike you, I’m not going to hit you. Why did you just slap me?" He asked sounding hurt, "I don’t know." I whispered Oliver, letting out a loud sigh. "Bull Tas why? Just why?" He asked, "I don’t fucking know Oliver! I’m just not feeling myself today and all I want to do is be alone!" I screamed at him, "Really? You want to be alone? Tas, babe please just talk to me!" He yelled out at me in frustration.
I looked up at him and just burst out into tears, he rushed over towards me wrapping his arms around me, I grip his shirt crying into his chest. "I don’t know, I feel like it’s weird to have the whole family here and she’s not here. But also I’m angry all of the time for no reason, I need to pee all of the time even if I haven’t had a drink yet I need to pee before I have a drink. God forbid if I would like my food to stay down because it won’t! Every day I wake up and my stomach has gotten bigger or my boobs and I’m just plan old sick of trying to find outfits to fit or having to go buy a new set of clothes just so I can outgrow it by next week and I have only just gotten into the second trimester! One minute I want to slap you the next I want to rip your clothes off! I feel like a fucking crazy person and I don’t fucking know why! I don’t even want to go running or play hockey! That is not me!" I cried out, he starts laughing, I rared back up at him in shock then anger he just continues on his laughter.
"What is so funny Oliver?!" I snapped, "Worked out what is going on." He stated, he squats down lifting up my shirt giving my growing stomach a kiss before whispering loud enough that I could hear. "Are you two right there making mummy crazy with hormones? Daddy would like you two to give her a few hours break, please?" He asked, "Are you serious you think they are the reason why I feel crazy?" I asked shocked, "Yep." He said, "Can I slap you again?" I asked, he smirked at me, "Only if it’s a kinky one?" He asked, I burst out into a fit of laughter, as the room was filled with knocking.
"You two good? Ollie our dad has arrived Lee has gone back out will be back soon he didn’t say what he was doing either. Dad wants to talk to you Ollie and won’t tell me what it is about?" Jackson complained, "None of your business Jackson, hurry up Oliver." Charles snapped, Oliver stood up giving me a quick kiss on the lips before making his way towards the door. "When you leave this room better leave that mood you’re in, in this room and not at our son’s birthday party." He ordered.
Then he left, leaving me stunned as Jackson looked at me with concern on his face, he looked back at Oliver and his dad then back at me nodding his head he walked into the room closing the door behind him crossing his arms over his chest giving me his best pissed off big brother look that he does so well when he’s about to tell me off. "Tasmine Rose Kelly Brown are you really chucking a hissy fit? Because that is what it looks like to me and to be honest your too old to be chucking this type of fit, in my opinion." He snapped. "Fuck you, Jackson!" I snapped at him and tried to storm past him but he blocked the way glaring back at me.
"Don’t you dare snap at me Tasmine. What the hell is going on here? I know your missing Grandma we all are but this is not you at all! Also, don’t go blaming those two for causing you to behave like this. You can talk to me you know that and I won’t tell Oliver anything you have said and I will be making you tell him. So babe you ready to spill?" He asked, I arch an eyebrow up at him, crossing my own arms under my bust. "You’re not going to let me leave my own room until I do right?" I asked, "Correct." He said, I let out a sigh running my hand through my hair before sitting on the bed, he sat down next to me looking at me worried.
"Really I cannot blame the twins? Cause I feel like a crazy person right now. I’m all over the place one second I’m happy the next I’m sad or angry or crying at the drop of a hat. I just want to be alone all of the time and not hang out with so many people around me. None of this is me at all Jackie and I don’t even want to go running or play hockey in the backyard. Fucking sick of having to buy clothes because I have outgrown them! Also, Oliver knows all of this so you don’t have to keep that from him." I said, "Right, so all of that is hormones from the twins? I don’t remember you being like this with Christopher." He asked, "I was, remember just before our wedding." I reminded him, "Oh right yes I remember. But none of that makes sense as to why you don’t want to have a BBQ dinner with family after Chris’s birthday?" He asked.
"Cause she’s not here Jackie, it feels weird like it’s wrong. Just wrong but also I hate myself for having these feelings. On top of all of that, I’m worried that the house won’t be finished by the time I have to give birth. I know shhh." He went to open his mouth but I covered his mouth with two fingers. "Also worried that I have to sell my car so we can get a bigger car to fit the children in cause my car is not large enough to have three car seats in the back and well not going to put it into Oliver’s work ute. Even if he had kept his old car the three of them won’t fit. And fuck Jackie I just would love to have sex with Oliver longer than two minutes before I need to vomit cause it sets my vomiting off." I cried out, the room was so quiet I know we don’t talk about our sex lives but I just let it slip out and I haven’t even told Oliver this yet.
"Um, yep most of that I have yet to tell Oliver can you keep it to yourself?" I asked quietly, nothing he was so quiet now I’m worried. "Can you please say something, Jackie," I whispered, I sat back wriggling around so I could get comfortable with my six-months size stomach, I’m scared of how big I’m going to be if this is what I am like early on? My clothes either fit my stomach or my breast never both that are from my pregnancy days with Chris which I don’t get but clearly my body is so much different this time around.
Jackson just sat there still not saying anything I nudge him with my foot. "Jackson please say something or I’m leaving you in here," I said loudly, he looks at me and I cannot read the look on his face either. "Right, well we are never talking about your sex life ok. That was weird love, even for us. Right, first off the house I will do everything in my power to make sure it is ready before those two arrive if not happy to pay for your hotel bill until it is or whatever Oliver agrees with. Secondly, it is never wrong for feeling like that love towards your gran, I feel that every day when I do something and send the photo of my son to dad and then I’m left thinking I wished I could send this to my mum too. It will never go away you know this with your mum and Noah it’s the pain that lessons over time. You just need to put one foot in front of the other and just try to live each day for your son and your twins along with Oliver. Thirdly, the clothes you know stretchy or maternity clothes are the go-to you know this is what you had worn with Chris just do that or pull out the clothes you had worn when you were pregnant with him. Fourthly, the car you know will be going to someone who will love it, and the next one is suitable and good cause if those two are boys I know you both would want a fourth to hopefully bring a girl into the world you will need a seven-seater. Finally, I love you Tas but fuck you are leaving this room in a better mood than when Oliver dragged you in here. Now how can I do that babe?" He finished with a small smile on his face, we are both unsure of what to do which was odd for us.
"Why does this feel odd?" I asked, "Probably because we normally muck around or joke not often are we this serious together. Come on I want to show you what we made." He stated, "Ok, I’m sorry Jackson." I whispered, he was in the process of getting up when he stopped and looked at me oddly, then he squints his eyes at me. "Why did you just say my full name?" He asked, "For putting a damper on Christopher’s birthday party, I" I burst out into another fit of tears, he quickly wraps me up in a hug. "Gez love these twins are really playing havoc with you, they must be girls as you weren’t like this when pregnant with Christopher." He stated.
"You think?" I asked, "I hope so, our family is full of boys we need some girl's, love." He said with a big smile on his face, "Well then you and Jo start having some more then, I have a feeling these two are boys." I told him, "Nope not having it little thing those two are girls! I can feel it in my blood." He yelled out, I start laughing at the face he is pulling, he points at me with a big smile on his face. "Good got you laughing again, come on you need to see what I made you will love it, and beg that I make it at every birthday party you have!" He said loudly with joy in his voice.
"Oh wow, brother you think highly of your food." I said laughing, "Argh! I’m so hurt by your words! I will have you changing them once you try them!" He said trying to sound hurt but he didn't, I laughed as I followed him out into our kitchen seeing platers of food lining the kitchen benchtop. Wow, he wasn’t kidding about the food being good, it was the best and I want more of it.
"You better leave some for the guests’ Tas." Oliver said loudly, "I am, but you should really try this they are the best!" I told him, "Told you, you would be eating your words." Jackson said with pride in his voice, "I know I tried them earlier." Oliver said.
Jackson nods his head at Oliver before giving me another hug and kissing my forehead heading outside to join his wife, Jo, along with Ava and Justine. Leaning back against the kitchen bench looking back at Oliver making sure he sees me checking him out. "So Tasmine are you ok with this all going ahead?" He asked, "Cannot cancel as they are all about to arrive but I’m looking forward to seeing how Chris will respond." I told him with a small smile on my face, "Good." He was standing right in front of me now leaning downing and my nostrils are filled with the smell of his aftershave, that smell is turning me on, he gives me a smirk.
Oliver places both hands on either side of me leaning further in biting my earlobe. "I see you are after something, won’t be happening until we go to bed my love so just enjoy this one kiss." He said kissing just under my ear, trailing it along my jawline finishing up at my lips with a smile on his face barely touching my lips he took a step back giving me his game on smirk that he does for the game we both love playing, then leaves the kitchen leaving me all hot and flustered for him, trying to catch my breath then I heard someone laughing behind me.
Turning around in shock that they had witnessed all of this realising it was my dad, Auntie Danielle, and Uncle James all sitting at our dining room table with coffee cups in their hands all in a mixture of shock, embarrassment, or amusement. "Um..." I mumbled, that is all I could say as both my dad and uncle do the same look with one eyebrow up.
"Hi, Dad, Uncle James, and Auntie Danielle see you outside when the party starts hey!" I did an odd smile before bottle out of the room racing outside but not before I heard my Uncle. "Fuck your daughter is acting odd today, Lee." Uncle James said, "I’m still shocked she didn’t see us here." Dad said.
I spot Oliver over in the far corner of our back yard helping the people who we hired the jumping castle off, he spots me looking at him and all he did was smirk at me, I gave him the finger which caused him to laugh, the bugger knew my family had been watching. "What’s up little thing?" Max asked with a smirk on his face too, "Your cousin is dead when I get near him." I said, "Oh good you finally have seen the light with him, a bit late though you’re pregnant with his children again," Max said with a massive smirk on his face, "Yep majorly late now you have to deal with him until all three of them turn eighteen years old." Sam joined in, "Don’t forget Oliver wants a little girl would he beg her for another go even if they are" Andy started to say but Oliver cuts him off, "We are what?" He asked looking at us all, "Apparently your dead mate." Dean told him, "I am who by?" Oliver asked, "Your wife mate." Max said finally laughing, Oliver’s eyes found mine with one eyebrow raised up, while I glared at him with our friends trying not to laugh.
"Hmm, why am I dead for Tasmine?" He asked, "You know why, you knew they had been in that room." I snapped at him, "Oh was someone getting a bit kinky and didn’t notice the oldies in the room?" Sam asked playfully, "Seems so babe." Andy said smiling at his boyfriend, "And she seems to have her knickers in a twist over it." Dean joined in, "Are we making it worse?" Max asked, "No." Oliver said, "Yes." I snapped, "Good because you have guests arriving right now." Sam said point them out as they walk into the backyard from the side gate, "Fuck just watching you all was priceless." Jackson said laughing, "Second that by the way all the kids are awake and are in the jumping castle with Jose if your all are wondering." Justine said, "Thanks, Justine." Oliver said.
Our back yard and patio are all decked out in Star Wars theme decorations, food, and drinks for the kids. The photo of Christopher that we have up is of him dressed as a Jedi with a bb8 in the background with other star wars props and the word one, the cake in the cake smash was R2D2, he was covered in blue icing in this photo with a massive smile on his face he loved it.
I have no idea what I was so freaked out about, it was so much fun laughing and chatting to other parents and their little ones, along with joining in playing around with Chris and his little friends and family members. He thought he got to smash another cake again, Oliver was quicker than me and moved the cake out of his reach.
The two grandad’s are now playing with the toy lightsabers with Christopher in the back yard, while the drunk adults are jumping around in the jumping castle laughing and screaming. Uncle James and Uncle Jimmy are cooking at the bbq while Jackson and my Aunties are in the kitchen making the salads. I have made my way back to our bedroom as another bout of vomiting had hit and it hit me hard with tiredness, a light tap on my door jam bought my eyes up to the doorway. "You ok Tassie?" Josephine asked, "Yep, just feeling like crap is everyone ok?" I asked. "Yeah, everyone is fine. I was worried about you hun, want me to cuddle up to you?" She asked, "You know you never have to ask babe, get in here." I smiled at her, she lets out a giggle and races towards the bed climbing in wrapping me up in a hug.
"You will feel better soon babe." She whispered, "Hope so too." I whispered we cuddled up together for a few minutes before both our husbands came looking for us. Oliver leans against the door jam while Jackson stood at the end of the bed with an over dramatised look on his face. "Really ladies?" Jackson asked, "While the house is full of family?" Oliver asked, "Really, you both are worried about what we would do together?" Josephine asked, "Still? After all of this time." I said, Oliver, smirked at me getting my quote, "Highly offended Husband and brother-in-law!" Josephine snapped, "Come on dinner is ready to get up." Jackson ordered, "Are you feeling well enough to get up babe?" Oliver asked me with worry in his voice, "I’m hungry so hopefully they will let me eat." I said, Oliver walks into the room holding his hand out, I took it he helps me out of bed we leave the room hand in hand, once outside our son noticed us and came running over and slamming into my legs.
"Mummy! Daddy!" God, I love him calling me that, "Hey my baby boy, you enjoying your birthday party?" I say this picking him up giving him a hug while walking over towards my favourite seat while Oliver gets our plates and drinks ready. Placing Christopher down on the side of me he starts tapping my belly gently then kisses it while everyone around us makes sounds of enjoyment. "My baby’s mummy!" Christopher yells out, I laugh at him saying his siblings are his baby’s, fucking cute as anything. "Ahh, baby boy they sure are your baby’s!" My dad said.
Oliver was laughing as he placed our drinks on the table in front of us, sitting down next to me handing me my plate, while Christopher climbs down from my lap and races off towards Oliver’s dad who walked over taking Christopher’s plate off Oliver. "Come on Chris let’s eat dinner with each other." Charles said, "Two grandads?" Christopher asked, "Yes both of us baby boy." Charles said, "Goodie!" Christopher yells out in joy, Oliver leans in giving me a kiss on the cheek, while I tried my hardest to eat some of the food. "Not feeling it?" Oliver asked, "Nope." I said.
"Seeing as his birthday party was Star Wars theme does that mean we are watching one of the movies tonight? Is that what Max and Dean are setting up over on the shed wall?" Uncle James asked Oliver, "Yes, that is what they are setting up but we are watching The Rise of Skywalker tonight." Oliver said, "Oh awesome I liked that one." Uncle James, "Good, I’m not hungry you can eat the rest babe. Hey, Jackie want to help me out?" I yelled out, I spotted Jackson had finished eating, he turned around with a smile on his face. "Sure what’s up love." He asked, "Help me set up the seating area for the movie." I asked, "Sure, babe you want to help out too?" Jackson asked his wife, "Sorry I’m just about to feed him." Josephine said, "I will help you two out." Andy said.
They followed me to the garage where we had stored the extra beanbags, airbeds that fold up like lounge chairs, pillows, and blankets. After half an hour the movie was about to play and everyone was all seated and gotten comfortable, myself and Oliver are laying down on the lounge bean bag with a pillow and blanket while Christopher slept quietly on his father’s chest all knackered from his birthday, I wasn’t far off either. It was a lovely end to a fun filled afternoon and evening.