Free Spirit

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Chapter 14


“Why’d we have to get up so early?” I moaned, hugging my body to keep warm as we made our way down to the dock. “I need coffee. And it’s July! Why is it so freaking cold?”

“Quit your whining,” Paddy ordered with a frustrated sigh. “I didn’t force you to come. They’ll have coffee onboard. And this is Northern Alaska. We aren’t far from the Arctic Circle. Did you really expect to be sunbathing by the pool at seven in the morning?”

“You tell her, Paddy Wagon!” Osk called out from behind us. “We gotta keep our women in line.”

I turned around to glare at Osk. My romantic feelings for him were fading by the day. I thought I was in love with him before the trip. That’s why I asked Paddy to be my fake boyfriend. To make Osk jealous, so he’d ditch his date and make a commitment to me. But I wasn’t so sure about my feelings for Osk anymore. I’d never really spent any time with him outside of the bedroom until Alaska. He was kind of an ass.

“I didn’t expect to be outside at seven in the morning. Who gets up this early by choice? And you have no idea where we are. They won’t tell us.”

“There’s a map in the lobby, Alexis.”




“Good morning, folks!”

I stared at the guy on the dock. He was actually wearing one of those skipper hats. And he was way too chipper for that time of the morning.

“Oh my God,” I muttered under my breath.

“Who’s ready to see some super cool birds?!”

“Dude!” Osk laughed. “You make that sound so dirty!”

“How?” he asked, wrinkling his brow.

“Bird, pussy?”

“Oh right,” he nodded, frowning at Osk. “Anywho, this is Eliza, your guide for the tour. I drive the boat. She’s the bird expert.”

“Hi all!” She squealed, her high-pitched voice causing actual physical pain to my eardrums. “Today is gonna be great! The weather is perfect! And the birds are waiting!”

Eliza was going to be extremely annoying. She was like a cartoon character, vibrating with far too much energy for her tiny body. What kind of grown woman wears her hair in braided pigtails? Especially one blessed with a classic shade of red hair. And it was natural. There was no doubt in my mind, that if she dropped her drawers, I’d see the same shade of red between her legs. She was probably sporting a full seventies bush. A heavy layer of freckles covered her nose and cheeks. Her eyes were a bright blue, very rare for a redhead.

I was a big girl in the chest area, but my tits didn’t look out of proportion with my body. Eliza was barely five-foot with a slim build. But her tits were bigger than mine. How did she stay upright?

And Osk and Paddy were fixated on them, like a hungry pair of pathetic dogs with their tongues hanging out.

The boat was kind of old and rickety looking. I hesitated while the others climbed aboard, glancing over my shoulder to see who else was coming on the excursion. But the dock was empty.

“Are you coming, Alexis?” Paddy called.

“I guess so,” I mumbled, accepting his outstretched hand. “Is this safe?”

“Of course!” Eliza replied. “It has to pass safety inspections to be used for commercial purposes.”

“Yeah. I bet there’s a lot of boat safety dudes wandering around up here, too.”

She let out a high-pitched squeal. “You’re funny. What’s your name?”


“Nice to meet you, Alexis.”

“And I’m Paddy.”

“Very nice to meet you, Paddy,” she said, her annoying voice dropping a few octaves as she smiled up at my boyfriend.

Give me a break. Go bump uglies with the skipper, and stay away from my man.

My man?

What the fuck?

See? Too early in the morning for my brain to function properly.

Osk held out his hand, planting a kiss on her knuckles when she accepted it. “I’m Osk,” he drawled.

“I know who you are,” she giggled. “It’s so cool to meet someone famous. We don’t get many celebrities up here. I was disappointed that Reefer didn’t sign up for the tour.”

“He’s busy banging his bride,” Osk informed her.

A bird landed on the railing of the boat, interrupting our introductions.

“Oh look!” Eliza exclaimed. “Our first bird. And we haven’t even left the dock! I have a feeling it’s going to be a great birding day!”

“That’s a Ring-billed gull!” Osk exclaimed.

“You are absolutely correct, Oskar!”

“I know my birds,” he informed her with a sly grin.

“I bet you do,” she giggled.

“Are you into birds?” I asked Silicone Princess.

“No,” she laughed.

“Me either. Where’s the bar?”

“There’s no bar,” Eliza said. “But there’s a small lounge at the back of the boat with coffee and donuts.”

I sat across from Silicone Princess, taking a sip of my coffee. “This is not good,” I grumbled, swallowing the mystery liquid that tasted more like water and chemicals than coffee.

She reached into her bag, producing a flask. “This will make it taste better.”

“Fucking right, it will,” I agreed, holding out my mug.

“I knew I’d need some help getting through this boring trip.”

“I can’t believe Osk is into bird-watching,” I laughed.


“You knew?”

“Unfortunately,” she said with a heavy sigh. “He has all kinds of bird shit at his house. I hate his parrot. And it hates me.”

“Osk has a parrot?!”

“Yes. His name is Harvey. And he’s a pervert. Osk taught him all kinds of dirty words. And he likes to watch us fuck while he provides a running commentary.”

“That’s kind of disturbing,” I said.

“That’s Osk.”

“Have you been to his house a lot?”

“Yes, sweetheart.”

“I’ve never been to his house,” I said sadly. “Not once.”

“I told Osk he should’ve been more upfront with you. You had a right to know he had a girlfriend. But he insisted that you guys were just casual. And he thought you were okay with a non-exclusive arrangement.”

“I thought I was. I’d never had a boyfriend. And I didn’t think I wanted one. But I stopped seeing other guys after I started hooking up with Osk. Until I found out about you.”

“And that’s when you got together with Paddy?”


“Paddy seems like a nice stable dude, but unless you want to get married and have kids, I don’t think he’s right for you. That guy has commitment written all over him. I bet he fantasizes about your womb when he’s fucking you.”

“What?!” I laughed. “Somehow, I doubt that.”

“Trust me, honey. I’ve been around a lot longer than you. Dated a lot of men. I’ve learned to spot the womb seekers. All it takes is one crafty little swimmer, and your life is over.”

“I guess you don’t want kids?”

“Hell to the no!”

“Me either. I like my vag just the way it is.”

“To tight pussys!” she declared, holding up her coffee mug.

I laughed as we banged our cups together.

“You’re all right, Sexy Lexy,” she said. “I can see why Osk likes hanging out with you.”


Is it too late to ask her what her name is?


“Are you sure you’re not interested in a threesome?” she asked, pouring some booze in my empty mug.

“I’ve never been with a girl,” I admitted. “It used to be something I thought I wanted to try. But I’m not so sure anymore.”

“Why’d you change your mind?”

“I’ve settled down quite a bit in the last year. Partly because I can’t go out clubbing as much. I’d have to stay with friends in the city. And I’ve lost touch with some of my friends since I moved to Horseshoe Bay.”

“Nothing beats having a cock in your mouth and a chick eating your pussy at the same time,” she whispered. “No, wait. That isn’t true. Having a cock in your pussy while you’ve got pussy in your mouth, and the owner of that pussy sucking your clit. That is the best.”

“That sounds interesting,” I giggled.

“No, wait!” She took a swig directly from her flask, glancing over her shoulder before leaning in close to my ear. “I can do better. Nothing beats having a cock in your pussy while you’ve got pussy in your mouth and the owner of that pussy sucking your clit and another chick sucking on your nipple.”

I held out my mug. “Hit me.”

“We aren’t playing poker,” she laughed, topping me up.

“You’re all right.” I almost said Silicone Princess, catching myself just in time.

“Yeah?” She reached over to rub my thigh, her fingers coming very close to my pussy. “I think we could have a lot of fun together.”

I lifted her hand away and stood up. “I’m gonna see what the guys are up to.”

“You never know until you try!” she sang as I walked toward the front of the boat.

Paddy and Osk were taking pictures of some birds perched on a rock, whispering excitedly while Eliza stood between them. She had a hand on each of their backs, caressing them while she rambled on about Puffins and bird breeding.

I clenched my fists, the liquor in my system fueling my jealousy.

How dare she touch my man?

Which man are you referring to, girl? Neither one of them belongs to you.

I marched across the deck, wrapping my arms around Paddy’s waist while I nudged the busty bird geek aside with just enough force to make sure she understood he was taken. She stumbled into Osk, a strained laugh escaping her throat when caught her.

“Careful there, Red,” he chuckled. “Wouldn’t want you going overboard. We need your bird expertise.”

I slipped my hand under the waistband of Paddy’s shorts, running my fingers through his treasure trail. He captured my wrist, removing my wandering digits before I could get to the good stuff.

“What are you doing, Alexis?” he whispered.

“Dude,” Osk chuckled, cocking one of his pierced brows. “If you don’t know what your girl is doing when she puts her hand in your pants, we need to have a chat.”

“I know what she’s doing,” he said, shaking me off like an annoying bug. “I just don’t know why she chose to do it in front of other people.”

“If you look to your right, you’ll see a black oystercatcher swooping down,” Eliza announced. “They use their heavy bill to break open shellfish, and are usually quite vocal.”

As if on cue, the thing started making an annoying high-pitched call across the lake.

“Cool,” Osk said quietly, his eyes following the dark-coloured bird with white feet as it landed on the rocky shoreline.

Whatever was in Silicone Princess’s flask was seriously fucking with my judgement and common sense. I ran my hand over the front of Paddy’s shorts, surprised to find no erection. He yanked my hand away from his crotch for the second time, his scowl of disapproval doing nothing to deter me.

“What’s wrong, baby?” I whispered.

“Will you excuse us for a minute?” he asked.

“Sure,” Eliza said. “Hurry back though. We’re going to be passing an area that’s popular with the Long-tailed Jaegers.”

“Oh boy!” I yelled, my fake enthusiasm a little too obvious.

“What is wrong with you?” Paddy asked when we reached the far side of the boat.

“Nothing. Why?”

“You tried to grab my dick,” he hissed.

“That’s what pretend girlfriends do.”

“That’s what jealous pretend girlfriends do.”

“What am I jealous of?” I scoffed. “The birds?”

“More like the bird lady.”

“As if,” I muttered.

He narrowed his eyes, studying me closely before he grabbed the back of my head and crushed his mouth against mine. Before I could get my bearings and kiss him back, he pulled away.

“You’ve been drinking.”

“Nuh-uh,” I said, staring at the deck.

He tilted my chin up, forcing me to look at him. “Where did you get it?”

“Get what?”

“The booze, Alexis.”

“Silicone Princess brought a flask,” I snapped, pulling away from him. “What’s the big deal? We aren’t allowed to have fun?”

“Of course you are,” he sighed.

“Then why are you treating me like a disobedient child?”

“Because you’re acting like one.”

“Yeah, well,” I sputtered, combing through my booze soaked brain for a witty comeback. “You’ve been hanging out with Osk and bird girl all day.”

“Because this is a bird-watching excursion. And they’re interested in birds.”

“I’m interested in birds.”

“No, you’re not, Alexis.”

“You’re right, I’m not,” I admitted. “But you are. And if it’s something you enjoy, I’d like to know more about it.”


“Because you’re my best friend, Paddy.”

“I’ve been your best friend for almost nineteen years. You’ve never shown interest in any of my hobbies before.”

“I’ve done a lot of things with you on this trip that I’ve never done before,” I whispered.

“That is true,” he agreed huskily before pulling me into his arms, his mouth sealing over mine.

He kissed me deeply, his tongue pressing forcefully against my lips until I surrendered. My pussy pulsed, hungry whimpers erupting from the back of my throat while his talented tongue probed the depths of my mouth.

Imagine what he could do with that tongue between your legs.

“Where did you learn to kiss like that?” I panted.

“I don’t know,” he murmured, nibbling on my lower lip. “I guess I was just gifted with excellent tongue skills.”

“Have you ever used that tongue for anything else?”

“Well, I talk and eat,” he teased.

“I wasn’t talking about that.”

“Are you asking me if I’ve gone down on a girl?”


He lifted his head, gazing deep into my eyes and sending my heart tumbling over a cliff. “I’ve done pretty much everything except intercourse,” he whispered. “There’s only one girl I’ve ever wanted to do that with.”

Hannah was right!

How could I have been so blind?

Paddy was in love with me!

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