B E L L A M Y
It was a little past four in the afternoon when I made it home. I was able to refrain from ordering and drinking a second bottle of wine. Instead, I chatted up a cute girl at the bar.
It was only when I was about to leave and ask for her number that she informed me she had a boyfriend.
So, I stumbled back into the house I now called home, kicking off my shoes in the hall and closing the front door behind me.
Noah was sitting on the couch, watching some weirdly confronting documentary about fish, and ignored me when I walked into the room. I let my eyes wander over his body for a second, my intoxicated mind controlling me, stopping me from looking away as I noticed the tattoos peeking out above his collar, his muscular legs sprawled out in front of him and his biceps bulging as he leaned his elbow on the armrest to his right.
Whoa, get yourself together girl.
I shook my head softly, walking towards the kitchen. Grabbing myself a glass of orange juice to push away the impending nausea, I turned to the cooking island, narrowing my eyes at a note with familiar handwriting.
It was from Isaac, telling me he was at Katy’s tonight. Great.
I threw the note in the trash, accidentally knocking my half empty glass over and spilling orange juice everywhere.
“What’s wrong with you?” Noah said from the couch, and I steadied myself on the counter.
“Fuck off, Noah. Go back to watching your stupid ass documentary,” I bit back, grabbing some paper towels.
He turned and narrowed his eyes at me. “Are you drunk?”
I scoffed, ignoring his question and focusing my attention on the mess I had made.
As soon as I had cleaned up the last drop of orange juice, I sprinted upstairs. I made sure my door was closed before I fell onto the bed, the room spinning around me as I looked up at the ceiling. Maybe ease up on the drinks, Bella.
Deciding to take a quick nap before dinner, I stripped down to my mismatched underwear and crawled under the soft covers, closing my eyes.
I turned, frowning in my sleep when I heard Noah’s voice in my dreams. Able to forget about it as soon as it happened, I continued to enjoy the very explicit scenario I was sketching in my head, until the hot college teacher that was taking me missionary style suddenly turned into the devil himself.
I awoke with a shriek, feeling hands on my shoulders.
Noah was standing over me, brutally shaking me. “Hey!”
He straightened up, crossing his arms and staring at me with a cocked brow. “Are you deaf?”
“Leave me alone.” I rolled my eyes, grabbing my sheets and turning away from him, trying to get back to my dream.
“Jesus,” I heard him mumble under his breath, and I yelped when he roughly pulled the covers off me.
“What the hell?” I yelled, grabbing whatever I could find to cover myself up.
“Fuck, I didn’t need to see that.” He shielded his eyes, and though it was very clear we couldn’t stand each other, that little comment really hurt.
“Get the fuck out, Noah,” I sneered, jumping from the bed and pushing him out of my room.
He gave me one last look, before he stormed out and down the stairs while mumbling under his breath. “Fine, don’t eat then.”
I looked at my phone, seeing that it was already 8 PM, and realized that I had slept for three hours. Oh.
Still, he didn’t have to be such an asshole about it. Then again, that’s basically his middle name.
I quickly pulled on some shorts and a T-shirt, twirling my hair into a bun, before I made my way down the stairs. My stomach rumbled as I stepped down the last step, sighing when my eyes landed on Noah.
“What’s for dinner?” I asked, plopping on the couch and grabbing the remote from him.
He sighed and straightened up on the sofa, grabbing his phone. “Let’s just order.”
This wasn’t going too bad. What could be so hard about ordering food?
“Can we have pizza?” I asked, starting up a movie.
“You’re out of luck, Goldilocks.” Noah tapped away on his phone and I could see from my peripheral vision that he was checking out Chinese food.
I scoffed, crossing my arms. “I don’t feel like having Chinese food.”
Noah looked up at me, ready to roll his eyes. “Since when are you such a spoiled brat?”
“Spoiled brat?” I placed the remote on the couch next to me, shifting in my seat. “So not feeling like having Chinese food makes me spoiled?”
He narrowed his eyes at me. “Not everything is about you, Bellamy.”
I hated the way he always used my full name. Everyone called me Bella, but this idiot had been ignoring that ever since he found out that I didn’t like to be called Bellamy.
“Fuck you. I just felt like having a simple pizza Margarita, but whatever.”
Noah rose from the couch, flipping me off and walking to the kitchen. “I’m paying, so I’m choosing.”
I turned back to the TV, trying to control my breathing. One day, I’m going to snap.
“Let me pay then,” I said through clenched teeth, keeping my eyes on the screen in front of me.
Or, I tried to. Because I couldn’t help my head from snapping back when Noah spoke again. “With what money?”
“Excuse me? I can fucking pay for dinner.”
He leaned back against the kitchen counter with a glass of water, slowly bringing it to his lips as he continued to watch me.
I waited for him to say something, hurt me more, make another nasty comment, though I should’ve just agreed to Chinese food because we all knew I couldn’t afford dinner anyway. Especially after lunch.
“Didn’t you spend all your money on alcohol?” he asked, no hint of sarcasm in his voice and no trace of a smirk on his face, though his eyes still had that mischievous sparkle like they did all those years ago.
“You know nothing about me.” I balled my hands into fists, trying to control my anger towards him.
In all my years of therapy, I had learned that I matter, I’m strong, but along with that new found confidence, came a lot of anger. Anger that had been building since high school.
Instead of walking up to him and slapping him in the face, I stormed up the stairs. Fuck dinner.
After I had calmed down a bit, and put a movie on my laptop, I thought about what he said.
Do I drink too much?
It was always an escape for me. The feeling that you could take on the world and only today mattered. That you could just forget all the bad stuff for a minute, and be too busy with your hangover the next day to care about other things.
I shook my head, grabbing my phone and scrolling through Instagram as I listened to the movie in the background.
The sound of my stomach rumbling distracted me multiple times, but I was too petty and proud to go downstairs and eat something.
Why did I care what he thought anyway? He was just a friend of my brother, and when I was ready to move out, I’d never have to see him again.
He didn’t care about my feelings, my well-being. And I didn’t care about his.
The sky outside started to turn orange and red, but I preferred it. I didn’t bother to put a light on as it got darker in my room, the screen from my laptop casting an unhealthy hue over me.
Just as I was halfway through Jurassic Park, I jumped because of a loud knock on my door.
“What the—” I shrieked, pausing the movie and facing the door. Did I imagine that?
“Eat,” Noah’s voice sounded muffled, but still boomed through the house, and I waited a couple of seconds before I walked to my door.
“I don’t want fucking Chinese food,” I muttered, still whining despite the fact that he made sure I got something to eat. He probably didn’t want Isaac to think that he was starving me.
However, when I opened the door, I wasn’t met with a plate of fried rice or something like that. Instead, it was a pizza box.
I looked down the hallway, raising my brows at Noah who was shaking his head while walking down the stairs and disappearing into the living room.
Without hesitation, I grabbed the warm box from the floor and went back into my room, opening it up. The smell of cheese and red sauce hit me in the face like a brick wall, and as if on cue, my stomach rumbled again.
I felt slightly guilty as I picked up a slice, but was able to shrug it off as soon as I tasted the pizza on my tongue. This was what I had been craving all week.
Watching the two sequels during the remainder of the night, I hadn’t noticed that it was already three in the morning when the last one ended. Sure, the house was quiet and it was dark outside, but I got too sucked into the world where dinosaurs existed again, to notice the time.
Sighing, I stood from my bed, grabbing the empty pizza box and walking downstairs. I couldn’t help but smile a little when I saw another box in the trash, but I quickly cleared my throat and straightened my face when I realized who I was smiling about.
I drank some water and made my way back upstairs, ready to pass out.
Just as I was walking past Noah’s room, I heard something. I froze in place, listening. Was there an intruder in the house?
I frowned, my eyes gliding over his door and my hands itching to open it up. But I wasn’t about to invade his privacy. Besides, I didn’t really care. Did I?
A few more pleas and unrecognizable words reached my ears, confirming that he was probably having a terrible nightmare, but I made my way to the bathroom to brush my teeth.
I was sure he didn’t want me to hear this, nor mention it ever, so I shrugged it off and got ready for bed.
It could’ve been something I could hold over him in the future, sure, but there were certain lines I simply couldn’t cross.