8: Best Night
The smile on my face can’t be wiped off, I laugh at Zac’s jokes about his time without me. The whole time he plays with my hands, swirling and making patterns in it.
All of the furniture in his house is exactly the same as it was before. The light grey couch and dark rug, but his room, his room is the best part. It smells just like him and he has the same wooden bed that we used to sit on and laugh together.
My urge to cry is taken over by happiness. I sit with Zac in his bed watching some movie I’ve never heard of. I don’t really care about the movie; I just care about snuggling up to Zac. My Zac, I haven’t been this close to him in what seems like a lifetime, and I have him back.
I lean my head up to his neck and close my eyes. “Zac,” I whisper and a small mumble escapes his lips telling me he’s listening. “I missed you.” I breathe and I feel the smile on his lips.
“I missed you too.” He grabs my hips and lies down, taking me with him. We lie facing each other and I feel like I’m in a trance. “I want to take you somewhere.” He muses as he grabs my hand and plays with it. I nod my head sheepishly and rest in his arms.
I don’t quite fall asleep but I may as well have been. Zac caresses my hair and I hum our song.
“You still remember that song?” Zac mumbles and I nod my head slightly. He reaches for a remote to his music player. An intro plays before some lyrics can be heard.
Ah Ah, I was thinking bout her, thinking bout me, thinking bout this, what we’re gonna be.
We both lie in silence listening to our song on repeat. I want to say something to him, something that means the world to me, but the right words just won’t come. Zac nudges me and I look at him before he gets really close to my face and stopping right by my lips.
“I remember it too, and there isn’t anywhere in the world I’d rather be then listening to this song with you. I know that no one will understand the meaning of it like you will.” he whispers and smiles, I can’t help but smile as well. He lifts up and although I’d prefer to stay like this longer, I know Zac has plans. “You’re going to love this.” He smiles and takes my hand to lead me to his car.
When I don’t make a move Zac looks at me encouragingly. “Come on, you’ll love this.” He tries to reason with me and I sigh, having ruined our moment I don’t think things could get any weirder.
“I would, but...” I let out a deep breath, sucking in some air. “Now just isn’t a good time for us to be spending romantic moments together. Besides, I’m here to watch a movie with you, not to go for a drive.” I hold my breath as Zac gets out of the car and eyes me while he makes his way towards me. I close my eyes, trying to avoid whatever throwback I’m about to get, but I only feel Zac’s fingers brushing a hair out of my face.
I open my eyes slowly, taking in Zac once more. He shrugs and I let out my breath, “I get it. And you’re completely right, now isn’t the time to show you this. How about, we schedule a date then?” I nod slightly and wait for what happens next. But nothing happens.
Zac leads me back into the small house and I hear him sigh. When he pops his head out from his bedroom door I automatically head over. “Well you can have my bed. I’m gonna sleep on the couch.” I nod before he leaves the room and I’m left on my own. Quickly I slide off my jeans and hop into the bed to get under the covers as quick as possible. I sit in Zac’s bed, lifting up his doona I take in the smell of it and close my eyes, storing the smell away so I’ll never forget it.
“Zac?” I yell throughout the house. He appears in my doorway without his shirt I and I don’t even try to hide when I look at his defined abdominal muscles.
A wicked smile plays on my lips and Zac looks at me laughing. “Yeah?” I snap out of my fantasy and shake the memory away.
“Um, I was just saying good night... and thanks, for letting me stay in here.” I fumble over my words, surprise by the sudden heat of the room.
Zac laughs again. “Yeah sure. You’re welcome.” He taps the door frame before smiling and leaving.
I settle in to the covers and prepare for the night; hopefully with Zac’s smell all over me the dreams won’t be so bad. Letting him stay with me is so out of the question, I don’t even want to think about it. Slowly, I slip into unconsciousness, and having Zac’s smell doesn’t make a difference.
I’m laughing with Tyler, but hit eyes are pits that seem to pull in my soul. “Tess.” My name escapes his lips like a snake, trying to come for me. I lean up against the wall, suddenly alert; Tyler pushes me against it further and I feel his weight all over me, the violation makes my chest feel like it might explode. He starts to undo his belt and I try to wriggle out of the way.
“No.” I keep trying to get away, but he won’t stop. “No, no, no...” I keep saying it over and over. Something pulls me away, out of my dream, I tremble out of it and sure enough I feel strong arms around me. My heavy breaths come out ragged and I feel the steady beat of Zac’s breathing. He’s asleep. He heard me in the night and came for me.
Being with Zac, I’ve had to get used to him being over protective. But it’s worth it for him, he keeps me safe and the moments I share with him are out of this world. I can’t believe this; I’m in his arms again. I’m so happy I can’t contain it. I feel giddy just thinking about it.
Zac, I’m his, I’m Zac’s
And I never want it to change again, I’ll make sure no one gets in our way again because I want nothing more than to be with Zac. Even if it’s not in the place he would like us to be, we’re together and I want us to stay together because if he leaves again, there will be nothing to live for anymore.
Zac mumbles in his sleep beside me, “I l... I love... Tess... Love her.” His words are barely coherent but I know I hear them properly.
I feel like I should say something in return to his unconscious self. “I know you do.” I whisper as I close my eyes and prepare for the real dreams to start.