I woke up bathed in warmth. Gio’s uninjured leg was thrown over mine, his arm was secured around my waist, and his head was in the crook of shoulder with my arm around him. I smiled and closed my eyes again so I could just let THIS happen.
After our argument last night, I had stayed in the bathroom until he had fallen asleep. I then walked out of the room and went out to the balcony that overlooked the city. Just standing there reminded me of who I was and what my responsibilities were. I couldn’t be with Gio and I couldn’t do things with him. I need to get back on track and that boy needed to be pushed out of my life.
Starting after he gets up. Right now I am too comfortable to care.
I felt his cool breath on my skin and I looked down to find his eyelids twitching like he was on the verge of getting up. I closed my eyes and calmed my breathing and waited for him to start to panic, but it never came. I crack my eye and found him staring up at my face with a weird expression. I hadn’t opened my eye enough for him to know I was awake, so the look he was giving me was honest.
“What the fuck are you doin’ to me?” he whispered. I am so glad I am not the only one that ask that.
I felt his soft lips press against the spot right next to my nipple and said body party hardened. He peeked up at me and then slid his tongue across it. I bit the inside of my cheek so I wouldn’t moan and mentally yelled at my dick to stop hardening.
His hands slid across the top of my boxers and his mouth went up to the part of my neck that had me actually moaning. I opened my eyes and he was hovering on top of me with his lip between his white teeth. I looked down at his mouth and he did the same to me. I outstretched my shaking hand and cupped the back of his neck. He leaned forward and I leaned up just as the door swung open and Sam came in.
Gio rolled off of me and I stretched like we weren’t doing anything. I swear every one is a cock blocker lately. Maybe that is God’s way of saying stop the madness.
“You have an hour to get ready for school and the boys are waiting for you there,” Sam said while looking between us two.
“Thanks pops,” I said and he stopped staring at Gio to smile at me. He had always been like a father to me. That’s why I ran to him instead of one of the other boys’ dads.
“Shower and redo your bandages,” he said and then closed the door. I sighed and put both of my hands to my face. We have to stop! Why can’t we just fucking stop? It’s like every fiber in me wants him but my brain knows what is right. It is like world war fuckin four in here, we skipped world war three already.
“You showering first?” he asked. I looked over at him and he bit his lip. I reached out and used my thumb to pry his lips apart so the plump item would no longer be caught in between such a grip- that was not mine. He moaned and captured my thumb between his teeth instead.
“You should stop,” I said as I slid across the bed, closing the distance between us. He sucked my thumb into his mouth and nodded. I let my other hand fall on his waist and he slid in closer to me so we were plastered together.
His eyes went up to mine and I got a visual of him on his knees in front of me with cock buried deep in his hot throat. I groaned and then climbed on top of him. He let his legs fall open and I hit his erection, making my whole body light up in sexual bliss. I rubbed myself against him and again no words were spoken, because then it would become real.
A knock sounded at the door. “Forty-five minutes and I don’t hear the shower!” Sam called.
“I’M GOING!” I shouted and then got off of him. I felt his hand reach for mine but I kept limping until I was in the bathroom. I looked back against my best intentions and found him looking after me. I gave him a nod and he nodded back. It was a silent agreement that we were indeed done.
Gio and I walked up the front steps side by side and I was surprised to find Ralph and Frankie talking in the front of the school. It was a normal conversation which had me turning to give Gio a quizzical look. He shrugged and then walked over to the rest of his boys. I sighed and did the same, leaving Frankie and Ralph to talk.
I hugged Sammy and gave to other boys fist bumps before looking back at Ralph. “What’s up with that?” I queried. Sammy just scuffed while the boys all rolled their eyes. “I asked a goddamn question!”
“We don’t know! They have been talking like that for like five minutes now and they are giving nothing away,” Leo hissed. I looked back at them and they shook hands before parting. He gave me a fist bump and got in his spot beside Leo.
“What was that?” I asked with my leader face on.
“Nothin’,” he said and then looked toward the sky. I shrugged and then looked over to the Catalino boys to find Gio with some skimpy troll in front of him with her cheer skirt barely covering her no ass.
I am not jealous. I can’t be jealous. I promised myself that THIS was over for good. I-
“Man, are you okay?” Sammy asked while putting his hand on my shoulder.
“I’m not jealous!” I yelled. Sammy stepped back with his hands up. I widened my eyes when I realized what I said and then shook my head with a curse. “I’m fine.”
“Ya sure? I think you might have loss too much blood there , Vin,” Ralph said. I looked over at him with a look that shut his damn mouth and then let my eyes go back to Gio. The girl was in his arms now with an adoring look on and Gio was smirking that smirk that was mine. I growled and looked around and found the perfect candidate.
“Emily,” I said. The head captain of the cheerleading team looked over at me with wide green eyes. Her honey brown hair fell into her eyes before she pushed it back and gave me a nervous smile.
Perfect hair. Perfect eyes.
“Yeah, Vincent?” she said with her eyes downcast. I smiled at her cute innocent act or maybe she really was and I am just being a stereotypical asswipe. I crooked my finger at her and she walked over to me with a tentative smile.
“You are lookin’ sexy,” I said laying on my Italian accent heavy. She blushed and bit her glossed lip.
I put my hand on her hip and brought her close to me. She bit her lip harder and blushed. I felt his green eyes burning holes into the side of my neck but I could care less.
Two can play at this game.
“Can I ask you for a solid?” I whispered close to her ear so none of my boys would hear. She nodded and placed her hand on my chest. “I am going to kiss you and can you not slap me?”
She laughed loud at that and then leaned back. “I would be honored to kiss you Vincent Mussolini.”
“Now, flip your hair and then look at Giovanni Catalino while I kiss your neck,” I whispered into her ear. She smiled and did what I said. I kissed all over her neck and she giggled. It was cute in a way but I was too busy thinking about how Gio would react.
“He looks about ready to blow,” she said and then leaned her head back and smiled. I kissed her neck and then made my way up her to her ear. She smiled and looked over to Gio and so did I. The girl he was with was trying to get his attention as he ground his teeth together.
“Ready?” I whispered as I nibbled on her ear. She moaned and nodded. I bent her down until her long hair brushed the ground and then captured her lips. She grabbed onto my bicep harder as the boys began to cheer and passing girls turned green with envy.
She opened her mouth and I dove my tongue into her the fortress until she hiked her leg up on my hip and plastered herself against me. I picked us up and then separated our mouths. Her smile was like a million bucks when I set her back on the ground.
“Call me, anytime,” she said as she brushed her hair out of her face. I smiled and kissed her cheek before she waved good-bye to me and then the boys. I turned around and they all started to do what boys did after their buddy got some action.
“Get it!” Ralph hollered.
“Hell yeah!” Georgie said.
“I feel like I just watched porn!” Leo screeched with a smile from ear to ear. He made sexual motions and then moaned loud enough for some people to stare at us.
“That was fuckin’ hot, hot!” Sammy said and clapped me on the shoulder. I laughed at their childish coos and then smiled when I felt Gio right behind me. I turned around and smirked.
“Sup, Gio?” I said with my smirk.
“FUCK YOU!” he yelled and then punched me in my wounded thigh.
“CAZZO CAGNA!” I screamed and fell to the ground. I vaguely made out stars before I passed the fuck out.
I saw a bright light switch from one eye to the other and I groaned from the intrusion. I slapped whatever was causing me this unnecessary pain away and tried to sit up but only got a stomach churning pain in my thigh.
“Cazzo! Fuck! Mother Fucker!” I cursed when the pain didn’t go away. I reached down and clawed at my pants where the wound was hidden.
“We need to get those off,” I heard a male say above me. I knew it as our school nurse’s. I had run ins with him a lot during my four years of high school. He began to tug on my pants and I groaned in disapproval. If he saw my gunshot I would be taken away by fucking CPS. Where the fuck are my boys? They should be stopping him.
“Whoa! Fuckin’ stop!” I heard Gio say and that had my eyes popping open. I made out the tile ceiling of the school’s nurse’s office and then looked to the side just in time for Gio to cup my face.
“Hey, stronzo,” he whispered. I tried to smile but pain shot up my leg. I looked down and found blood seeping through my khaki cargos. I groaned and fell back onto the hard bed.
“You stop fuckin’ touchin’ him,” Gio hissed at the nurse. The big black man in question stood up and glared at Gio. Our nurse was so not what other schools had. He was big, black, and a man. His name is Jack and he is a fucking dickhead.
“What relationship is he to you?” Jack asked. Gio looked down at me and then toward the door. He looked down at me and smirked.
“This is my boyfriend.” I gasped and tried to slap him but he caught my hand and kissed it. “We are not public yet but please don’t make me leave and just listen to me.” Gio smiled at Jack who was looking between us two. “His dick has been bleeding lately and that’s why I don’t want you to touch it.”
“Ewe,” Jack said.
“Real fuckin’ mature,” I hissed and then yanked Gio down on top of me. He yelped and then groaned when I put my face into his neck. I bit his skin and then licked a path to his ear. “You are gonna pay for that, boyfriend.”
“Make me pay,” he rasped and pushed a growing area into me.
“Um, guys your dad is here Vincent,” Jack muttered. I pushed Gio off and heard him hit the stool on the way down to the floor.
“Mother fucker!” he hissed.
“I made you pay,” I said just as pops walked in. He gave me a look and then looked down at Gio. I watched him walk over to Gio and help him up before he looked down at me and smirked.
“How’s the leg?” he asked.
“Oh, no. It’s his penis, sir,” Jack answered. Pops looked at him and then at me and Gio who were laughing our asses off. Jack gave me a hard stare and then opened his mouth as if to curse us, but looked at my pops and thought better of it. I gave Gio a smile and then continued to laugh.
“I’ll be takin’ both the boys out,” my pops said to Jack. Jack kept staring at me and Gio as Gio helped me up. We continued to laugh as pops walked out and went with Jack. When our laughing died down we stared at each other and then I remembered how I got in here.
“Come here,” I whispered low. He looked at me with confused eyes but still took a step toward me. I grabbed the back of his neck and threw him on the bed where I had been sitting. I hitched his wounded thigh up on my hip and squeezed it hard making him scream. I pushed against him and moaned as he screamed again.
“That is such a sexy ass sound, Gio,” I moaned and he pushed down against me. I heard the door knob and backed away from him with a wink. He was panting and pops frowned when he took us in.
“Who hit who?” he asked with his arms covering his chest.
“He hit me and made me faint,” I said and stuck my tongue out at Gio.
“He just squeezed my thigh until I screamed!” he yelled back.
“I’m sorry you’re such a screamer!” I hissed back.
“Oh, you just said it was a sex-“
“Fuck you!” I screamed over him.
“YOU WOULD LOVE THAT WOULDN’T YOU!?” he screamed. I lunged at him and my pops caught me before I could get to his throat. I growled like a rabid dog and Gio cursed me out in Italian. I elbowed my pops in the ribs and he hit me in the thigh, making me screamed.
“Calm down now!” my pops screamed and then Jack was holding Gio back. Tears came into my eyes for some odd reason but I didn’t let them fall. I just stared into the eyes of Gio and let him see what he was doing to me. How he was ripping me apart from the inside to the out.
“Don’t you ever talk to me again!” I screamed and everyone paused. “Don’t you touch me, talk to me, think of me, and don’t you dare ever step foot into my room again! I don’t want you anywhere near me!” I screamed with tears finally falling.
My pops scuffed in disgust, “Stop acting like a cagna! You need to learn your place or I will have to take you out! You need to know who you are and what you stand for Vincent and put your bullshit to the side. I am not going to claim someone like you! Someone weak!”
I paused and pops’ eyes widened in realization of what he said. “You don’t have to claim me,” I whispered and ripped myself away from my dad and limped out of the room where Tommy had been listening the whole time.
“Vinnie?” Tommy whispered but I kept going.
I limped all the way to my car and opened the door and sank into my leather seats. I slammed the door and looked up just in time to see Tommy run out of the school screaming. I hit the gas and swerved over to him and he opened the door just as my pops ran out.
“Tommy! Vinnie!” pops screamed.
“Go!” he cried and I hit the gas. I drove and drove until I got to my safe spot and then hopped out of the car with my face in my hands.
“Fuck!” I screamed and then tears that I had been holding broke free. I collapsed onto my knees and rocked back and forth as I cried. Tommy came over to me and wrapped his arms around my waist before he cried with me.
“Everything’s all right big brother,” he sobbed. “Everything is okay.” I shook my head because nothing is okay. Nothing will ever be okay. I am falling in…..love. I’m falling in love with a boy-a Catalino- a curse- a blessing- a tragedy. I am falling in love with Giovanni and there is nothing I can do to stop it. I have tried to ignore THIS but I can’t. He can’t. We can’t. Our feelings are just too strong. They are wrapped around us like a lifeline and neither one of us is about to let go. Neither one of us wants to.
“Vin?” Tommy sobs again. I take my hands off of my face and pull him into my chest. He cried hard against my neck and I let him. I knew what it was like. The pain he was feeling. The agony. I knew what this life did and what it took away.
I was Tommy.
Tommy is going to be me in the future.
“You don’t ever lose sight of who you are,” I said. He sobbed louder and I yanked his chin up so he would look at me. Tommy was innocent. He didn’t deserve this life. “Tommy you don’t ever lose sight of who you are. No matter what pops does, or how ma handles things, or what happens to me. Baby brother, you don’t lose that sparkle in your eyes. It is just too damn important.”
He closed his eyes and the tears kept coming. “I’m scared Vincent….I’m so scared.”
“Me too, Tommy. Me too.” I held him against me tighter and he held my shirt in his fist. I looked to the side when I heard a cars screech to a halt. Gio was the first out of his car and then his boys piled out. The other cars held my boys.
“Y-you-“Gio tried and then he gave up and fell right onto my hug with Tommy. He nuzzled Tommy’s head and I cried harder and found his hand. All of the boys began to crowd around in our hug. Sammy starting singing an Italian song that had always been a light in the dark for us Mussolini boys. It was about love…but meant so much more to us.
We sang out to the sky as though we were trying to make god hear us. Everything was so complicated and with this song we became one. Gio’s hand stayed in mine and I felt his tears on the side of my shoulder. Not one of us had dry eyes, because we all knew what it was like.
“I love you guys,” Tommy said. “Everyone single one of you. Ti amo ragazzi.” We all said it and huddled closer. This moment we were one. There were no Mussolini or Catalino.
There was just us.
“From now on. We are in this together,” I spoke after the sobs became silent. “We are to take care of each other. I am done with waiting for my pops to finally take me out. I am done. We are a family now. No one is a name. We are just us.”
“Yes,” Sammy said and then everyone agreed until it was only Gio. Gio looked up at me and smirked with a sad tint to his eyes.
“Yes,” he whispered and then we all slowly let go of each other.
“God, this is so fucking confusing,” Ralph said.
“No doubt,” Frankie answered.
“Mother fucker,” Gio hissed. I turned around with Tommy to my chest and found every single one of our pops’ but Gio standing there with confused looks. I met my pops’ eyes and he looked passive; like nothing mattered at all to him.
“All of you boys go home,” he said. “There will be a meeting at my house tomorrow to tell you what we are going to do about this mess. Our families are falling apart and we need to find a way to keep us together.” He looked over at Tommy and me. “All of us.”
“Sammy,” Sam whispered and Sammy bolted up and into his pops’ arms.
I hadn’t realized until right now what Gio and I were doing to everyone. Our arguments, our hate, our…love? We were slowly tearing everyone down but also building them back up. My pops was finally seeing who I was, the boys were starting to try and grasp their once loving fathers, and I was finding out who I was.
I felt Gio touch my hair and I looked over to find him biting his lip. He opened his mouth but nothing came out. I closed my eyes and slowly opened them again. “My room,” was all I said and then I picked my baby brother up and carried him to my car.
We had to figure some things out not just with our families, but with ourselves.