“Would you just look at the paper?” I asked as I held it up in my right hand.
“I’m tired of saying no; now put your hand back on the wheel, you are not about to kill us and our unborn children.”
I rolled my eyes, but still did what she said, “So dramatic.”
“Not dramatic– cautious.”
“Whatever you say.”
“Yeah, because it’s all about me, glad we agree on that. Make a right.”
The woman on the GPS said the same thing, “You know, I have a GPS for the exact same reason.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t trust technology,” she hit my arm softly without taking her eyes off of the road, “you know that.”
“Yes, I do, now tell my why you won’t look at the papers.”
"Because Ty, these people lost a man that was near and dear to their hearts. I refuse to ruin their mourning period with lawsuits.”
“But, it’ll be fun,” I smiled and glanced over at her. Okay, she looked mad, “That was a joke, I swear that was a joke.”
She looked out of the window and muttered, “Sure it was.”
This woman was going to hold that over my head for forever. I didn’t understand why she wouldn’t just look at the lawsuit papers.
“How do you even know they liked this guy? There are a bunch different reasons why they could be doing this.”
“Okay, sweetie, you’re not understanding,” she spoke as if I was five, “this man lost his life, while I walked away with a head injury, a broken ankle, and two little buns in my oven. And now these people have to deal with that. Funeral costs just through the roof– the building right there to the left, pull in.”
“I will not remind you again about the navigation system built right into the dash.”
“Well, did your dumb machine tell you that the building was in the left?”
Just then, as if my GPS was responding, ‘In 500 feet your destination will be on the left.’
I gave my wife a smug look and turned into the lot of the building. “Ah, Tyler, this is so exciting!”
I nodded, “Yep, it is.” Once I was parked and the key was out of the ignition I felt lips press up against my cheek. I turned to see a smile on her face, which was only a few inches from mine. “Now what was that for?”
“For taking care of me and giving me these beautiful babies. Twenty weeks, this is happening.”
“Well, of course, it’s been my evil plan to knock you up since those first beer goggles in college.”
She chuckled, “You terrible, terrible man.”
I shrugged, “Yeah, but at least this evil plan maker has good genes. Our kids won’t be ugly.”
“Oh, please,” she opened her door and got out, but not before saying, “I’m pretty sure I handled those genes all on my own.”
With that she shut the door and came around the car. I opened my own door and got out.
“What was that?”
“What, my outro over there?” I nodded, “Like it? It doesn’t matter, let’s go. Time?”
I check my watch as she grabbed my hand, “4:37.”
“Ooh, come on, slow poke; we’ve got eight minutes.”
“Holy crap, your new-found mommy strength is inhuman.”
After checking in and being called up, we were lead into a exam room. The nurse did her thing and we only had to wait a few more minutes before Dr. Lovett came in, clipboard in hand. “Anastasia,” she said with a smile, “Tyler, how have you two been?”
“Oh, great!” Ana said.
“Is that so?” the doctor looked up from her portfolio, “Well, you certainly are happier than the last time I say you.” We both nodded with wide smiles.
We talked, and the doctor told us what to expect for the next few weeks until we saw her again. Afterwards, Dr. Lovett instructed Anastasia to lay down for the ultrasound.
“Only twenty weeks, right? Gosh, you look like me when I was about to burst.” she asked as she spread the ultrasound gel onto my wife’s stomach.
“Yeah, I feel like I’ve been growing every second since the moment I knew. It’s almost like it’ll never end.”
“Oh, trust me, it will; look at me. I’m baby free.”
“How many?” Anastasia asked.
“Seven?” the doctor nodded and Ana looked up at me while shaking her head. “Not seven.”
I grabbed her hand, “No, not seven. Just five, babe, keep your eyes in the prize.”
“Wait, five as in five pregnancies or five as in five kids?”
“Five physical human beings, and we’re already halfway there. In one try, after only six years.”
“We tried for four years.”
“Yeah, but we only tried one time that day. There was nothing on TV and you suggested...” I nodded suggestively, “and now... twins.”
“Okay, you two,” Dr. Lovett said, “I’m sure you’ll both want to hear this.” She pressed a button in the ultrasound machine.
A loud thumping sound came through some speakers. I saw Anastasia tear up a little, “Is– is that—”
“Yeah, mama bear, I think those are our babies.” I smiled and just focused on the sound.
Suddenly, after looking at the picture on the machine for a while, the doctor asked a weird question. “Do either of you hear the third heartbeat?”
“No. Is it Ana’s?”
“That question was more rhetorical; the third heartbeat is definitely there. And, including Anastasia’s heartbeat, this new one would make four. No... this is another baby.”
Anastasia scoffed, “What are talking about? That’s crazy, there are two hearts.”
“No, sweetie, there are three,” Dr. Lovett said. She picked up the machine attachment and moved it around on Ana’s stomach, “See, there he or she is, right there. Looks like you’ve only got to get pregnant two more times to fill the baby quota.”
“Maybe even once, considering your track record.” I said with a slight laugh, after recovering from the shock.
Ana’s face morphed from shock to slight anger. “Three? Three as in three whole humans that I have to push out if my body? As the number in which we have to start buying stuff. ’Oh, that’s cute, get three’. "
“Ann, calm down.”
“No, Tyler, I won’t calm down!” She faced the doctor, “What the hell is wrong with these hospitals? I mean, would you people make up your damn minds?! First, I’m pregnant with one, then two, then three. My womb isn’t a fucking clown car!”
“Mrs. Meyers, I am so sorry. Somehow the third child didn’t present itself until this appointment.”
“Sh– we know,” I commented, “can we just get a moment?”
“Uh, yeah, sure.” Dr. Lovett smiled and apologized again before leaving.
As soon as she was gone I turned to my wife, “Okay, you gotta stop yelling at the doctors.”
Completely ignoring me she said, “We’re so not prepared.”
“What are you talking about, baby, of course we’re prepared.”
“For one, not three. We aren’t prepared! Not emotionally, not financially– hell, I’m five months and we haven’t been to any type of parenting classes or birthing classes. We’ve just been cruising along like I’m not about to pop. Oh, my god,” she looked terrified and ignored my attempts to calm her down, “three kids. Three that are all going to claw their way out of me at once.”
“Well, I don’t think it’s like that.”
“How would you know if we haven’t gone to a birthing class?”
“Shut up, gosh, I hate you right now; you’re always trying to make the best of shit. Would you hand me something to wipe this crap off?” I handed her a napkin. “Why’d you do this to me?”
“I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry,” her anger was actually kind of funny.
“Oh, yeah, sure you are. Ugh, you’re such a liar, you’re happy that this happened.”
“You caused this... remember?” She looked at me and rolled her eyes.
Nah, she didn’t remember. But, I did.
“Tyler,” I heard Anastasia whisper. I woke up and glanced at the clock on the table next to the bed. I groaned when I saw that it said 3:17.
“Ugh, Angel, please go to bed.”
“No, Ty, I need to talk to you. Please, babe, come on.”
I sighed and sat up bed. “What’s up?”
“...We’ve been together a long time, right? At least a long time for us.”
What was this about? “Yeah, five years.”
“And in this time, we’ve grown... as people and as a couple. And, like, you don’t plan to... stop loving me– or anything, right?”
“I really have to get up early, so if we could just talk about this tomorrow—”
“Oh, give me a break, I’ve never done this before; just answer the question.”
I sighed again and answered, “Yes, I plan on loving you for a while, without stopping.”
“Well, good, but m–maybe it’s selfish to just keep all of that love that I have for you and that you have for me to ourselves. Maybe we should find someone– or maybe even multiple someone’s to share it with.”
“So, what, are we getting a dog or something?” She hit me, “Ow!”
“Tyler, wake up,” Anastasia whined, “you are smarter than this.”
“I really don’t think I am.”
“Gosh, you’re such an– I wanna have a baby,” she rushed out.
I sat in silence for a few seconds, “... What?”
“I want to have a baby, maybe more than one,” my eyes widened, “– well, it doesn’t have to be a lot if you... don’t want more. I mean, we can have as many as... yeah, and we’ll figure that out because honestly, I don’t even know how many I want. All I know, is that I want a kid– by you and—”
Felling like a complete idiot for not doing it before, I grabbed the sides of her face. Hurriedly, bringing her lips to mine. We stayed kissing, until I pulled her away from me.
“Well, you could’ve just told me to shut up,” she said.
“Shut up,” I quickly said. “I love you and I will forever. And we’re having a kid, lots of kids; hell we’ll probably mate like bunnies until world begs us to stop.”
She smiled, “Yeah?”
I kissed her again, “Wait, are we starting right now?”
“If you want.”
“Definitely, but what about work?”
“Ah, they can survive without me,” I waved off the thought.
Her face got serious for a second as we just sat there, taking each other in. Until she whispered something.
“Good, because I’d never be man enough to try to make it without you.”