Never Hitchhike Drunk

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Summary

Beware a Galactic beverage known as Space Lightning. It can get you into all kinds of trouble.

Genre:
Scifi / Humor
Author:
CM_Weller
Status:
Complete
Chapters:
1
Rating:
3.3 3 reviews
Age Rating:
16+

Never Hitchhike Drunk

Let me tell you, there are some cargo haulers out there who can make Space Lightning out of anything that can ferment.
And freeze-distilling that stuff in Kelvin-scale temperatures gives it one hell of a kick.
And my brewer in chief decided to drop me off somewhere light years away from my destination.
A planet in the middle of a generations-long war.
By the time I got there, they’d been killing each other for millennia and just about the entire planet was an immense graveyard. I say ‘graveyard’ but it was more along the lines of ‘garden’.
See, both sides elected to honour their dead with sort of… tree things. If you can imagine a hybrid of a carrot, pumpkin, broccoli and Yggdrasil as a ‘tree’. They looked like trees and that was good enough for me.
There was only one town left and it had a thick wall in the middle that passed for the spaceport. And administrations building. It was there that I discovered, in my hangover haze, that both sides were no longer fighting over any kind of moral issue. They were fighting over land in which to live.
All those trees left zero territory for housing or farming.
I went for an escorted tour and someone informed me that they were edible from root to leaf.
“Well,” I said, “Why don’t people eat the insides and live in them, then?”
You could hear a pin drop.
I wasn’t quite sober, yet, so I assumed the tour was over and ambled back to the hostel room that was literally a hole in the wall.
And when I woke up… I was not only saviour of the planet, but also the mayor of the now-expanding Broccolopolis.
I have my very own Ygdrassil-manor with an indoor pool, though. It’s not all bad. And they make a killer tree-sap brew here. Want to try some? No strings attached…

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Further Recommendations

TheShookethSister: I like the relationship between the two, they’re adorable. I like that they’re both nice to each other, not very common in arranged marriage books. All in all they’re well suited and i’d like to see how the book progresses. I’d recommend to my friends who like romance books and nice main leads. I...

Greg Anderson: Excellent read that is well constructed and developed from the start.

DestinyKitten: Really interesting and amazing story. It's funny, relatable to some degree and exciting, while an interesting plot. Other than needing a bit more detail and mistakes, it was perfect and definitely fit for the stores. It would be great to seen the other character's more.

viewcoco2007: Awesome book!!! I can't wait for you to write more books. This book has so much humor and it had intense moments at times. I like this book so much I plan on reading it again. Even though it had some punctuation and grammar problems every now and then. I do recommend this book for all to read. Th...

Truthy2022: Can you plz write another chapter or book. I really want to know what happens to both of the IT couple.

Ivory Fox: It was moving and good though the lack of real adventure was disappointing it turned out to be a good read

alfredemaculate: It's wonderful and wholesome.I love it ❤️

Diana G. Lim: I've read a lot of books referrencing to Cinderella's story but this is the first time that I've read a book referrencing to Sleeping Beauty's story!Kudos to the author for trying something so new & refreshing! Luv the storyline; there's romance, drama, the evil plot & the happy ever after. Kudos...

Maiabitcheese: Great story ❤️ love the CD of the FL with all the bullying and moving on. Great new found friendship and love. Perfect mix. Oh and I love Milton 🤷‍♀️♥️

More Recommendations

Deanna: This is the second book I've read from this author. What a great writer they are! I truly recommend for people to read this book.

HamiltonForLife <3: THIS IS SUCH A GOOD BOOK! Need to add more or another like this. Such an awesome plot 😆

Ilja : When are you gonna update again??

jogamaspearce: That was nice reading. Thank you.

viewcoco2007: In my opinion this was a wonderful, awesome book. At times it was very funny but then again it had some intense times. I'd loved all the characters in this book. The author of this book in my opinion is very talented. I have read a few of this author's books and I've loved them all. I might have ...

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