Mr Crunch

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Summary

Mr Crunch was new in town and he was looking for a weapon that packed a solid punch.

Genre:
Scifi / Humor
Author:
David Viner
Status:
Complete
Chapters:
1
Rating:
5.0 3 reviews
Age Rating:
13+

Short Story

Mr Crunch was new in town. Actually, he was new on planet.

He walked the streets, searching. After a couple of hours he found something in a back street that looked promising.

The shop sign said "Dag Strek, Licensed Armaments." As Mr Crunch pushed open the door the tinkle of a bell resulted in a "Be with you in a mo" response from a back room.

So he looked around at the goods on sale. Something on a shelf caught his eye. Perfect, he thought, pulling it down. His many fingers fitted the grip neatly and he noted that it was already fully charged.

Mr Crunch was grateful that the being that emerged from the shadows had its head and other appendages in the usual places. He hated communicating with strange forms – never being sure if he was looking them in the eye or possibly the rectum. Mr Crunch definitely preferred to look others in the eye and preferred those eyes to be located on or, at least, close to their heads.

"This," said Mr Crunch, waving the device under the shopkeeper's odour orifice. "How much?"

"Everything is negotiable," the shopkeeper responded.

"Indeed," said Mr Crunch, debating with himself where he would begin the haggle. "I will give you, hmm, 150 credits. It is rather old."

"Antique," the shopkeeper agreed, before adding, "and collectable. I could accept maybe as little as 500."

The haggle continued for a few minutes before Mr Crunch finally departed lighter to the tune of 295 credits and heavier by one Sinosian Electro-taser. He placed the device in a pouch within his outer clothing where his hand could become familiar with its shape and texture.

From another pouch he produced a key and used its locator function to lead him to the hotel. A short while later found him sharing an elevator with a couple of strange forms. He was relieved when they alighted several floors below the one he required, though the methane breather left its odour to accompany him the rest of the upward journey.

Outside the room Mr Crunch activated the key. As the door swung open he sprang into the room, the taser device gripped in his hand. The creature had its back to him. It started to turn.

"Where the hell have you be-"

The voice was cut off as Mr Crunch activated the taser, the force hitting the creature full in its ample torso. It howled and fell over onto the bed where it convulsed for a few seconds before becoming still.

Mr Crunch walked over and looked down at the creature. It slowly opened its eyes and stared back up at him.

"God," it said, "that was absolutely wonderful. And here was I ready to bite your head off… but you remembered."

"Of course I did, darling," said Mr Crunch. "Happy birthday."

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Further Recommendations

Whitley: This was really good, keep at it

Yassmine Farah: Waw what a plot it's breathtaking

Brand: It's a good story, well constructed. Some developing of aspects as the primal form of the alien would have been appreciated. All in all a good read

Lucille Mason: I’m thoroughly enjoying this book. Love the plot and characters. Can’t wait for the next update. ☺️❤️☺️

Stardust: I really liked the book. Your writing skills are gud

Sijile: Such a great pick me up and just what I needed to lift my spirits. A few typos here and there but nothing a quick edit can't fix. Love the storyline.

Jennifer Leigh Anne Ciliska: Fantastic!!! Absolutely Loved it!! Thank you for sharing your story with me

Columbine Pirouette: Its so entertaining I could not put it down. I enjoyed everything about it and would definitely recommend this enthralling novel.👍👍

Ben Santiago: Good quick read that makes you want to keep reading to find out what happens next!

More Recommendations

brandinicole2894: Very fun read. Attention keeping,romantic, sexy, sweet, enjoyed the Christmas theme. A few parts keep me on my toes to read more. I can’t wait to read more by this author. Keep up the good work.

Melody Velazquez: This is a great novel. I recommend this novel to everyone. It keeps the attention of the reader. I don’t have any dislikes about the novel.

Deanna: This is the second book I've read from this author. What a great writer they are! I truly recommend for people to read this book.

Geanina: Sweet story, love it

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