Earthrise

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Chapter 17

THE HALLS OF THE embassy were quiet and empty. Somewhere in a distant room someone was tamping the keys of a computer. Drinkwine had done his best to clean himself up in the hotel lobby men’s room—due the penthouse suite having been plundered in the night by the ravenous dust storm. His personal belongings destroyed, he was wearing the single remaining linen suit, which carried the scars suffered against the fury of Mars in a dusting of red. With each tired stride, grains of sand could be felt inside his shoes, irritating his toes as he made his way toward Kurian’s office. He slowed in his steps when he saw a man emerge from the Ambassador’s office at the end of the hall. The man was familiar—the open shirt and gold chains, pulling up on his belt to hike his pants up under his hanging stomach. It was the nameless fellow who had brashly offered him the bribe at the ski slope.

When he caught sight of Drinkwine an enigmatic smile crept across his large jowls. He was jubilant in his stride, pushing his overweight frame along with boyish confidence. He didn’t offer a hello, not one word of greeting as he passed within a breath of Drinkwine—merely maintaining a disconcerting eye contact. That disturbing smile spoke of mischief. A mischief that no doubt had just been unfolded in Kurian’s office.

When Drinkwine entered the office there was an air of awkward anticipation among the two secretaries. Their greetings were stilted and rehearsed. One of them opened the door to Kurian’s office, smiling awkwardly as Drinkwine entered.

The feel of Kurian’s office had changed. It was as if the furniture had been re-arranged. It had never felt comfortable, but at least there had been a modicum of salutation on previous visits. Now, there was a staleness, a furtive apprehension that permeated everything, right down to the way the sun was dully penetrating the windows, dirtied in the night by the storm.

Kurian was seated behind his desk, the little man looking smaller than usual, dwarfed by the oak centerpiece of his position. He was attired in yet another of his flamboyant wardrobes. Today; a pink paisley jacket and pant with gold vest, a silk ascot wrapped inside the collar. His normally vociferous demeanor, and that persistent habit of pressing his fingertips together as he raised and lowered himself excitedly on the balls of his feet, was absent. In its place was a different manner altogether. His body, usually erect, sank into the deep folds of the chair in a kind of defeated slump. The sprite, seemingly unflappable disposition had finally been usurped by some dark force. Kurian had lost the pretense, the coquettish behavior. Slouching there, arms obstinately draped over the armrests of the oversize chair, Kurian had the air of a bored king.

The Ambassador didn’t greet Drinkwine with words, instead just using his hand to indicate the chair opposite, the gesture only adding to the ominous atmosphere. Drinkwine wondered what the fat man had brought to bear on the situation that had left Kurian so horribly vanquished.

Drinkwine decided to strike first. “I’ve had a bit of an inconvenience,” he broke the placid air. “The storm last night demolished my room.”

Kurian stirred uneasily, as if Drinkwine’s comments had disturbed a carefully prepared statement. He had something troubling on his mind that needed to be addressed, evident in the fact that he still had not mustered the courage to look at Drinkwine. When at last he did he was surprised to see the detective’s disheveled appearance.

Regaining his composure, Kurian spoke, his voice having suffered a transformation to indolence, dropping a full octave. “Yes, I know.” The words were slow in coming. “The hotel notified me this morning.”

Drinkwine felt a little guilty for his own contribution to crushing the phony sincerity out of the Ambassador’s usual effusive demeanor.

Kurian lazily blinked. “We’ve a bigger situation.”

“Oh?” Curious, Drinkwine settled into the chair opposite.

“Yes, it’s been brought to my attention,” he said, using his delicate fingers to rotate the form on his desk and slide it across to Drinkwine. “Your passport, doesn’t have the required one hundred seventy days left before expiration.”

Drinkwine stared at Kurian. He was more interested in watching the Ambassador’s mannerisms as he dispatched the news than he was in the form.

“It’s all right there,” Kurian said, indicating the official immigration form, exonerating himself. “And not a thing I can do it about. Not a thing.”

Drinkwine casually reached out and picked up the notification. He read it through quickly. He didn’t really need the details. It was a trumped up charge. He had to smirk at the thought of all the people who were badgering the Ambassador to get him out of here.

Unfazed, Drinkwine tossed the form back onto the wide desk. It slid across the polished surface and came to a stop directly between them. “How far did you have to dig to drum that one up?”

Kurian’s eyes flared from the insult, delirious with anger. He burned into Drinkwine’s accusations with perfect contempt. “Detective, I am not a malicious man,” he said softly, “just look at these hands,” raising them up to make the point. “I am merely Ambassador to Mars. I have a responsibility to enforce the law.” Kurian stared at Drinkwine, wishing this could be the last thing said and that he would now simply rise and excuse himself. “You have our sincerest apologies, Detective.” His immaculately manicured fingers were trembling. “I’m terribly sorry for what must be a horrible disappointment for you. But we need to govern, to follow the rules—after all, we’re not barbarians.”

“Yes, so you keep saying.” Drinkwine stared with intent, “So who’s governing you?”

There was silence again. Drinkwine was surprised at how much anger was brewing in the Ambassador. He was actually entertained by it. “You do realize,” Drinkwine broke the tension, “they will send someone else.”

Upon hearing those words, Kurian’s disposition changed. His face relaxed, in subtle allusion to victory. “Detective,” he began, with the slightest hint of a smile at the corners of his small mouth. “If you remove your fist from a pail of water, it doesn’t leave a hole.”

Right then Drinkwine assessed that the powers above had appropriately used their far-reaching influence to quash any further investigation. How much money was at stake here that this many men could connive to such action?

“Alright,” Drinkwine intoned with passive indignation. “So, now what?”

“Fortunately, there is a shuttle leaving for the Moon in twenty-six hours.”

“Well isn’t that convenient.” Drinkwine got up out of the chair. “Actually,” looking at his watch, “it allows me some time to wrap a few things up.”

“Detective, you’re no longer in a position of authority.”

Drinkwine turned. Staring into Kurian.

“Technically, I am your superior now.” The little man was resting his chin on his clasped knuckles, face framed with painted nails. He’d regained some of that irritating buoyancy. “So, you will refrain from any further meddling into this.”

“You mean, this murder?” Drinkwine asked with spite.

“That’s right, your petty little investigation has come to its finish,” Kurian said with surprising bitchiness. The tone actually suited the absurdity of Kurian’s pink paisley outfit.

Drinkwine looked at the silk ascot tied around Kurian’s neck, and for a fleeting instant thought how much he would like to have hold of it, throttling the ineffectual Ambassador and snuffing out that fatuous little laugh of his.

He was powerless against the reach and want of these people, and accepted defeat. It wasn’t the first time. And it certainly wasn’t going to be the last. Drinkwine turned and started for the door.

Kurian’s words pursued him, “As regards your personal losses from the storm damage, you’ll be required to fill out a Loss & Damage report in order to be compensated.”

The words turned Drinkwine around, but Kurian had already dipped his head in feigned reading of some of the materials on his desk. Drinkwine had to smile at the ludicrousness of it all; Mars, the red sand stretching to the horizon outside the window, and the little man, Kurian, situated obstinately behind the massive desk.

Moving with hushed solemnity down the hall, his shoes squeaking against the over-polished marble, Drinkwine made for one of the offices where he was to try and make some vague appraisal as to the value of his things lost in the storm. What he was wearing and the few possessions he had in his pockets—including the last Holland—were all he had now. His suits, his toiletries and personal effects were gone. The investigation, with its reams of notes and study, had been systematically made worthless by the savagery of the winds, further dashed by a few indiscriminate strokes of a pen. With the investigation pulled from him he was merely a ghost now on Mars, with no purpose. To think, somewhere out there was a murderer who had just been granted freedom. Adding yet further condemnation was the knowledge that behind the great glass walls of Jannah were a host of individuals that gladly wished him gone. Well, they’d done it… amassed their collective powers in a protection of greed and trumped up a feeble technicality to rid themselves of the bothersome white man from Earth.

It troubled him to have been removed from the case. Equally troubling was his imminent return to Earth. His unhurried footsteps eventually brought him to the office where he was to make a report about his losses. A sign hung from the door on a perfectly braided little gold rope. The dainty circular wood sign replicated a clock, in Farsi it read: Office closed. Will re-open at… the hands of the clock adjusted to read: 14:00.

Drinkwine pulled back the sleeve of his jacket to check his watch. Not even ten o’clock. Four hours. He intrinsically knew what to do with the time.

The rover churned up the sand in clanking endeavor across the Martian desert. Drinkwine had taken charge of the vehicle under the guise of work, but actually there was a specific task in mind that had nothing to do with the murder of Michael Byrne. The transportation department hadn’t yet been made aware of Drinkwine’s banishment from Mars, so he used the opportunity to take one last jaunt into the great elsewhere. The hostility he held for this place was now abating with realization that he would be leaving. How funny, he thought, now he was getting sentimental about this fucking shithole of a planet.

As the rover droned out its monotonous rumble of tread, infested by the discordant shaking and creaking of its weathered and beaten body, Drinkwine stared out at the landscape; a great grieving gulf of nothingness, with nothing to distinguish one direction from the other. He thought how easy it would be for a man stranded out here to become disoriented and wander off to certain death.

At last the tedious travel delivered him to the old paddlewheel steamer, sadly majestic in its listing among the dunes. Drinkwine had come to undertake a specific mission. He hadn’t come to unravel questions and riddles, he had come here simply to be alone and savor the last of his precious Holland cigarillos.

Somberly climbing to the third deck of the landlocked boat, Drinkwine settled in to savor the view. With slow and deliberate actions he drew the Holland from his jacket, regarding it for a moment before snapping the silver lighter and glowing the tip in the small flame. The scent and smoke of the cigarillo wafted the surrounding area. The reprieve of stillness from the normal buffeting was as if the desert was sad to see him go, and was granting a soft so long to their favorite son.

As he drew on the last Holland, Drinkwine stared out at the endless red sand. The insouciant sand, he thought to himself. For a brief moment he thought how beautiful it was. But that was the trickery of Mars, lulling the visitors into complacency before pummeling them with its repertoire of abuses.

Drinkwine pondered the steamship. It was in quiet decline, without ever having served its purpose. It was like him; an aging, useless dinosaur, slipping toward extinction. Far away, over the ocean of dunes, man was attempting to force a home out of this reluctant land. They were making a fucking mess of it. This place would never be the paradise the developers were promising.

As he sat there, savoring the Holland, Drinkwine thought of all the artists’ elaborate renderings that were being beamed back to Earth and the Moon, propagating the lie of serenity. The discontent was so palpable on those planets, bending under the weight of overpopulation and the endless waves of crime, that the sellers of the lies had an easy go of it. They pounced on the tired hopes of the naïve and lured them with false promises of new lives on crime free Mars. What a bunch of marketing garbage. And after Mars they would sell Jupiter, than Enceladus, and Titan, all with the same empty promise.

The gullible fools buying in didn’t seem to notice that none of the sales people lived here. No, the sales people had never set foot on Mars. But man would continue to impose their will and the red planet would continue its steady repelling of their attempts to tame her. Drinkwine wondered if it was a case of an eye for an eye. He laughed, “An eye for an eye just leaves everybody blind.”

The Holland was ashing up. He’d smoked it halfway down. Just a few more precious tokes and it’d be gone. The five-week journey home was going to be a fucker of a trip without smokes. He tapped the burnt ash of the Holland over the teakwood rail and watched it flutter down, settling onto the red sand… the quietly malevolent sands.


The trek back to Jannah from the wind blown paddlewheel steamboat—with its forgotten ghosts of love inhabiting the tiny cabins—held a mix of relief and melancholy. Despite the frustrations of the investigation, it had allowed Drinkwine to drown some of his bewilderment and put off the angst of returning to Earth where he would confront the inevitable emptiness of the home that awaited him there. But, on the other hand, he would be gone from here, this dreadful, harsh place. So, they didn’t want his help. They preferred to let it all go unsolved, brushed quietly under the other lies they were propagating here. Fine. Let them fool themselves.

The rover’s alarm bell sang out with piercing intensity. Drinkwine didn’t know what it was. As the desert began its crawl to white, he realized it was a pre-set warning for the daily assault of the sunstrike. He’d not forgotten the frightening reality of the daily routine of deathly pouncing, but had let the time slip away in thought.

The temperature rose with alarming speed, blinding out the landscape in a wave of scorching glare. The rise of temperature was so immediate it warped the rover’s metal skin in a creaking of expansion. Drinkwine sank his face into his arms to protect himself from the debilitating heat. His skin crawled beneath his clothes, itching with irritating discomfort. He didn’t dare stop. He must wait out the great mistake of the orbiting Myoko mirror, pounding the planet with its misguided and unruly behavior completely unchecked. This pummeling felt more severe than the previous ones, perhaps due to the isolation, the unfathomable distance from cover. There wasn’t a single spot of shaded respite from the beating. Head hung, Drinkwine squinted down his eyes against the growing glare. Beads of sweat fell from his face and shattered like tiny glass balls across the floor of the rover. Through it all, the rover chugged along, defiantly groaning against the assault.

Finally, the glare began to abate and the temperature receded with pity. Drinkwine watched the thermometer as it drifted back to the normal roasting. He lifted his head and focused his eyes, blurred from sweat. Well, at least with any luck, that was the last of the sunstrikes he would have to endure. He wiped the streams of perspiration from his face as the rover continued its endeavor back to Jannah.

The faint clacking of computer keys let Drinkwine know that at least someone was at work in the vast reaches of the embassy. The sound grew steadily louder as he approached the office where he was to file his claim. Drinkwine wondered what the point was. There wasn’t really enough value to warrant the inevitable hassle of trying to follow up a claim across the cosmos, a celestial bureaucratic nightmare that would most likely be misplaced and fumbled in the process. Yet if by rote for following protocol, Drinkwine entered the office.

The young Iranian woman tapping away at the computer stopped her work and greeted Drinkwine with a genuine smile, completely unaware of her boss’ scheming and the artful ruse that was forcing the detective from Mars.

“I’m to file a claim, for my personal effects lost in the storm last night,” Drinkwine said with a sigh.

The pretty young woman reached down and pulled a file cabinet drawer open, adeptly fanning through dividers with her slender fingers, the nails brightly painted. She pulled a form from a manila folder and set it on the counter before Drinkwine.

“You will please to fill this out,” she began, setting a pen alongside. “With descriptions as to what was damaged or lost and what you believe the value to be. Then sign and date it, and make sure you put contact information for any compensation that might be granted.”

Standing at the counter, the Loss & Damage form in front of him, Drinkwine’s thoughts floated back to the fruitless investigation. A pang of dissatisfaction shuddered through him. He was being put off Mars by a bogus charge. How could they? The killer was being gifted amnesty by the powerbrokers—a killer, roaming free on the red planet. Damnit. How dare they. Resigned to it, Drinkwine pulled his bifocals on and studied the form on the countertop. He read a few lines of text before taking note of a stack of similar forms in a wire tray, already filled out and awaiting process.

The phone rang. The secretary picked it up, answering in Farsi. In her native tongue she asked the caller politely to give her a moment, then disappeared into the back room where Drinkwine heard file drawers being opened and closed in a concerted search.

Her absence gave Drinkwine the opportunity to finger through the stack of Loss & Damage claims in the tray. It was just his curious nature. Some might call it snooping. Actually, he was curious how others had described their various losses to lend him some guidance on how to scribe his own.

There were claims for various personal items that had been lost or damaged, representing a range of value, from small to large. Flipping through, the forms became a stop motion collage of things ruined by accidents and mishaps. Among them, certainly, were a good many falsehoods and phony claims. It was what this place was all about; corruption, money, greed. If they couldn’t be party to the huge pay-offs at the upper levels, such as those of contractors and politicians, the bottom feeders would get theirs by inflating the value of some personal item lost to God knows what kind of unscrupulous calamity. Mars was comprised of one continuous conga line of upturned palms; everyone in it for himself; everyone out for a fix, a scam, a bribe; everyone on the take, eager to make a dollar out of any situation that might present itself, regardless of who might be harmed, or who might lose. It was all being undertaken under the guise of a new and safe place to raise a family. Well good fucking luck.

As the forms flipped past, blurring the various handwritten claims of loss, Drinkwine’s eye caught, for one fleeting second, the name Jafar Barr. He fished through the forms to find it again and withdrew it from the stack. In neat, handwritten letters, the applicant’s name… Jafar Barr, the man Drinkwine had been in the middle of interviewing when he fainted. Below Barr’s name was the word, Agni; Urdu for fire. His rudimentary grasp of the language allowed Drinkwine to decipher that the report was filed with regard to a remote research shed which had burned to the ground while in the charge of Barr. A ‘total loss,’ the handwritten note explained in perfectly executed penmanship. What a strange coincidence, Drinkwine thought, to have happened upon this, a Loss & Damage report filed by the man he had been with when he passed out.

When the secretary returned and resumed her phone call, she glanced around, looking for the white man who had asked to fill out the Loss & Damage report. He was gone. She settled back into her chair and resumed the call, with one less task to concern herself.

Drinkwine flushed through the corridor, stirring the stagnant air with urgency. He was headed for the records room in the main administration building. He wasn’t supposed to be here. There were orders for him to be on the next shuttle off Mars. He looked at his watch. That was roughly eighteen hours from now. Happening across the Loss & Damage report filed by Jafar Barr was a strange and unsettling coincidence. He wondered if there was any value to the thoughts presently floating through his head. A coincidence—perhaps nothing more.

Drawing a vague hunch along with him, Drinkwine arrived at the records room. The woman there had seen him before, had seen him with Kurian, knew he carried a badge and, despite his color and nationality, bore some semblance of authority. Drinkwine was hoping Kurian had not sent out any official notification of his being pulled off the case and ordered off the planet. He asked calmly, “I need to see the releases for the interviews.”

When she casually retrieved the folder of forms from a cabinet without question, Drinkwine knew he was safe. He immediately began thumbing through, stopping when he found the one for Jafar Barr, scrutinizing the scrawl of notes. As his eyes reached the bottom of the form he had to digest what was there. On the line where the interviewer was requested to sign their name, Drinkwine saw a signature unfamiliar to him. He even flipped through several pages to confirm the discrepancy. The signatures were all identical; the large, rounded D, followed by the scribbled, mostly undecipherable letters that spelled out his name. Flipping back to Barr’s form he saw what was an unquestionable forgery. So, Jafar Barr had used the situation of Drinkwine’s fainting spell to forge his signature, and in so doing, exonerate himself from the investigation. Clever, Drinkwine thought to himself. But why? It was the first true breath of suspicion, however vague or unconnected, drawn on the murder of one Michael Byrne.

Thumbing through the sheaves of notes that made up Barr’s file, Drinkwine found numerous requests and sign-offs for rovers that corresponded with his outings to remote research huts to conduct his duties. There, in his handwriting, was his sign-out for a rover with the destination of the remote station that had burned to the ground. It was eight weeks previous, about the estimated time that the deceased, Michael Byrne, had been laid to rest in the sand. It all lined up with curious implications.

Voice not betraying anything of this disturbing windfall, Drinkwine pulled the woman from her work, “Could I get the address for Jafar Barr, please?”

The woman drew the name up on her computer. As she printed it out she read from her screen. “Oh, but he won’t be there,” uttering in broken English. “He’s on research in the 94th Quadrant.”

Drinkwine took the address. “Could I get the coordinates for the station where he’ll be working?”

She politely obliged.

With the two printouts in hand Drinkwine exited with a nod of thank you, the woman’s eyes curiously following him out the door.

The hallways of the long-term residences of the upscale dormitory were devoid of people. The residents, most being of scientific titles, were all off on their various duties, readying Mars for the influx of settlers that would soon be arriving. Drinkwine had hailed a cab from the embassy, once again suffering under the hostile eyes of the grudge master, Robert Haze, who, without a single word, stared at him with seething contempt in the rearview mirror all the way to the dorms.

The hallway smelled of carpet cleaner. So Jafar Barr had forged his signature. And he had been the assigned registrant to a remote research hut when it had burned to the ground about the time that the victim had gone missing. There were too many oddities for this to not have some significance. But was that reasonable evidence to make him a suspect in a murder? Well, either way, Jafar Barr was going to have to explain his way out of the forged signature. That alone would be cause enough to jail a man—well, Drinkwine checked reality; perhaps a white man on Earth.

Once Drinkwine had arrived at Barr’s door, he made a quick study of the lock. Producing a small metal file from his wallet he set to tripping it. After some fumbling the handle slid down, granting him access to the room that for a fleeting moment he thought, might possibly belong to a murderer. He curbed his imagination. Perhaps there was explanation. After all, thus far it was only a forged signature and a burned down work shed. Still.

Drinkwine slipped into the room and closed the door behind. The darkness smelled of Jasmine tea. Barr was gone to some remote station and would not be interfering. Drinkwine made a calculated inventory of the room. His eyes scanned the small space, soaking in the strange somberness of the order to it all; the neat stacks of papers and pencils, all aligned with perfection, spoke volumes. Nothing seemed out of place. In fact, the room was so disturbingly clean and perfectly organized as to suggest an unsettled mind. The dresser drawers were layered with perfectly folded shirts and pants and paired socks. The cabinets of the small kitchen held their cups and plates with unsettling order. One wall, appearing like a shrine, was dedicated to the collection of old vinyl records. Yes, Jafar had waffled on in his interview about his hobby; a passion for collecting old vinyl records. An ancient, perfectly refurbished turntable sat under a shield of clear plastic.

The shelves above were filled with old albums, their aged sleeves heavily faded, the edges dog-eared from excessive handling. The tastes ran the gamut; Middle Eastern music, American Big Band classics, Top 40 of the 20th Century. Drinkwine saw the records were arranged by artists’ last names and in order of release. Save for the disturbing order of the room there was nothing here to suggest Barr possessed any demons or sadistic characteristics. He was wasting his time. That’s what was going through his mind as he opened kitchen cabinets and drawers. Swinging the bottom cabinet open he was overcome by the distinct smell of lighter fluid. Sitting there was a small can with a narrow red nozzle, sweated with a thin layer of misted fluid. Using his handkerchief to lift the can by its nozzle, Drinkwine shook it, sloshing barely more than a quarter of the original contents. Barr had used more than half the contents for something… most likely arson.

Drinkwine’s mind raced. Normally, on Earth, he would now call in the findings and be given some backup to approach Jafar Barr for questioning about the forgery and suspicion of arson. But he couldn’t do that, not here. No one was going to help. In fact, the clock was ticking on his deportation. He had until the boarding of the shuttle before they would come looking for him. Kurian would most assuredly send a car to fetch him and take him to the space port. It wouldn’t be out of politeness, but rather to ensure the nuisance of Drinkwine and his badge, and all he represented, would be taken to the shuttle and blasted off the planet. Drinkwine wasn’t sure exactly what he was going to do. For now, the only thing his mind could conjure was that Jafar Barr was out there, in the desert. At this very moment he was at a research outpost, unaware that evidence was amassing that required explanation.

Drinkwine gathered his thoughts and left the room, with one last quick review in hope of seeing anymore damning clues. But there were none. He closed the door behind him.

The agent at the transpo center was taking his good ole time to check out another rover for Drinkwine. Every extra second the man toiled behind the computer Drinkwine took as a possible notification that he’d been removed from duty and was without privilege. Each exhale of the agent felt like it would be followed by a stout refusal. Drinkwine was relieved of his anxiety when the agent absently handed over a key, realizing Kurian had still not yet reported his deportation.


Trekking as fast as the clanking vehicle could muster, Drinkwine watched the city of Jannah as it became smaller and smaller in the rearview mirror of the rover. He pulled out the crumpled Loss & Damage report he’d purloined from the records room. It had the GPS coordinates for the destroyed research hut. It was too much of a coincidence; the hut under Barr’s reservation when it burned down, corresponding with the discovery of the body; the forged signature, taking advantage of Drinkwine’s unfortunate fainting spell. Well, unfortunate for him, very much fortunate for Barr. What was he hiding from? Still, until proven guilty, he thought—until proven guilty. It was training, to stay with the code of ethics. Innocent until proven. Until proven. Until proven guilty. Damnit. He pressed the throttle to its stop, ensuring he was getting everything there was to get out of the motor, the battery needle in rapid descent against the demands. Drinkwine was headed out into the remote reaches of Mars, toward a new jumble of questions that begged answering against a ticking clock. And he was alone, utterly alone.

Surely, Drinkwine thought to himself as the treads spun up the red dust behind, if the hunch he was presently entertaining turned out to be just, there would have to be some clue that the fire had not taken with it.

The barren plains were still and silent. The meandering dunes had been combed with intricate, delicate ripples left in the wake of the previous day’s storm. A faint breeze loitered about the area, gently stirring up a thin plume of dust, harboring threats of escalating the calm into a storm of blinding fury, ready to have yet another go at him. The landscape was marred by the single lay of the rover’s tracks, which the funnel of dust appeared to be studying in its drunken wavering to and fro, ready to smooth over all evidence that Drinkwine had been this way. God, he hated this place. How he hated it.


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