{{ contest.story_page_sticky_bar_text }} Be the first to recommend this story.
Get Free Copy

100 free copies left

This novel is limited to 100 free copies due to its part in Inkitt’s Novel Contest.

0
Free copy left
You can read our best books
Alex Spade would love your feedback! Got a few minutes to write a review?
Write a Review

The Honeymoon

By Alex Spade All Rights Reserved ©

Mystery / Scifi

Chapter 1: Marty & Doc Brown

This is a pretty shitty way to spend a honeymoon. No, shitty isn’t the right word. Too strong. Crappy? Yeah – I know – it means the same thing, but crappy seems less harsh. That’s not right either, though. Let’s just go with bad. No… very bad. This is a very bad way to spend a honeymoon.

It’s not his fault. It’s not even my fault. Well, I’m the one that picked our wedding date: October 24, 2020. It was the perfect date. Perfect.

We met at Janet’s Halloween party, five years ago. He came dressed as Marty McFly from Back to the Future. He was the fourth Marty that I saw that night. All the other guys were decked out in their jean jackets and puffy orange vest – so proud of themselves.

“Listen, I just got here from the year 1985,” one guy said as he approached me. He pulled out a copy of Grays Sports Almanac.

“It says here…” he’s pointing to random page. “That… um… what’s your name?”

“Kate.”

“Last name?”

“No.”

“It says here that Kate No and I have sex tonight…”

“It says that?”

“Yeah, right here.”

“It says in your sports almanac that you are going to have sex with me. Your sports almanac?"

“Um, yeah, I mean, no. Um… It says I’m gonna reach third base… You know… baseball… right?”

“Okay, well, the Cubs were also supposed to win the World Series in 2015 and their asses just got swept out of the NLCS. So I’ll make a deal with you. Next time the Cubbies bring the Commissioner's Trophy back to Wrigley, you can give me a call, McFly.”

How could I have known that they would win back-to-back titles in ’16 and ’17? I wonder if he tried to find my number. I hope he did. I hope he spent hours online searching for Kate No.

No, my future husband was too clever. His costume was a thing of beauty. And it worked. I was instantly drawn to him. I couldn’t even see his face. Didn’t matter. This was my kinda guy. I walked up to him.

“Who are you?” I asked, playing my part.

“Silence Earthling!” he said. He was covered head-to-toe in a yellow hazmat suit.

He pointed his hairdryer at me. “My Name is Darth Vader – an extraterrestrial from the Planet Vulcan!”

Forgive me, I’m leaving out an important detail of this story. And – look, I’m not proud of this – but it was a Halloween party and I was in my twenties. I was dressed as Doc Brown. Not a regular Doc Brown, but a – ugh – sexy Doc Brown, which is really a lot like Doc Brown but with a hell of a lot more cleavage. Nope. Not proud.

God, did we hit it off. Fate, right? It had to be fate. What are the odds that Marty McFly and a boobalicous Emmett Brown would both show up to Janet’s party? Well, pretty good I guess. There were three other Martys and another guy did come as Doc Brown. He had a pretty good rack too, if I remember correctly.

Who cares? It felt like fate. It felt like God, or gods or Mother Earth or whatever the fuck brought us together that night. It was meant to be. Destiny.

I like to say that I fell in love with him before I saw him. It was just icing that he looked like Chris Pratt when he took off his hazmat helmet. And I’m talking about Parks and Rec Pratt, not Jurassic Pratt. Parks and Rec Pratt is the best Pratt.

Heh, it’s ironic to talk about fate and destiny, considering where I am. Considering the fact that I’m spending the second day of my honeymoon in a hospital waiting room in Bangor fucking Maine. Busy day too. Doesn’t help that their entire system crashed this morning. I guess it just couldn’t handle the sheer amount of patients… is patients even the right word? I mean, nobody in here is sick. Not even a cough.

Let me rephrase that… Nobody in here is physically ill. But me? Mentally, I’m about as fucked up as they come. And I must not be the only one. Why else would everybody be in here?

Continue Reading Next Chapter
Further Recommendations

M. Drewery: I did think I would be reading just another Atlantis archaeological adventure story when I came across this book. However I think it's fresh and very different to other approaches to the same historical mystery. The first chapter drew me in brilliantly. I'm not great at spotting technical writing...

tsolaidowu: I want a continuation dammit....I loved this book and the 1st one. I can't believe this is it. I'm not ready to say goodbye to Jeff and Lorie; and the gang. Great book and storyline. You're a genius Madelyn.

kim: This is great! Maybe it could just be a little more specific. One of the keys to great writing is describing things in detail. I think you're off to a great start. I wish you much luck.

borkarprasad: Nicely laid story. Needed a little more ghost and Raven conversations. Initially, Had everyone on suspect list but satisfied by the precision to capture the killer. Waiting for more Raven and Cade adventures.

ericaporamoralcine: La trama es muy interesante y original y eso ya dice muchísimo cuando todos tratan de triunfar con ideas ya trilladas.No puedo opinar en detalle sobre la gramática, porque a pesar de entender el inglés a la perfección, la falta de uso en cuanto a lectura y diálogo hacen que me maneje bastante mal...

smile4me: Exciting page turner. I was barely able to put it down to go to bed. I can usually figure out the twists before they are revealed but not this time! Such a thrill to be surprised. I can hardly wait for the follow up!!

SandraHan1: This story is very descriptive, with vivid scenes from the very beginning, which made for a good scene setting. I love the symbolism in names, such as “Naysayers”, “Hadd”, etc . The story itself is revolutionary, intriguing, emotional and exciting. I was very pleased to see that there is a happy ...

NRF: I love this story, it has a little bit of everything in it, mystery, adventure, murder, innocence, love and a surprise twist that will leave you hungry for more! Great read! NRF

jigglypuff314: Feeling sad that you can't watch your harem hentai in class? This is the book for you! No one will suspect a thing (other than your boner) as you scroll through pages of some of the best porn you'll ever be able to imagine!Spectacular details and a wonderful tug of emotions, you won't know whethe...

More Recommendations

Samantha Speed: There were several punctuation, grammar, and missing word problems but it did not detract from the story. This story was very well done, enjoyable, and had an interesting enough plot. It took a while to finish. This story is not complete. I love it, but I want to see another book or have more cha...

nikole carr: After starting and stopping several books tonight, this book caught my attention from the very beginning and i stayed up until 6 a.m. to finish reading. The plot has many twists and the sexual scenes keep it interesting, too. im a florida native so the Caribbean location is fun to read about. th...

Deleted User: (A review in progress). I like this. It's sparse, gritty and atmospheric - reminiscent of the classic Golden Age of American detective fiction of the Thirties. I've only read the beginning, but I'll definitely be back. This writer knows their stuff and has done their homework on detective work. T...

Pille: This has been a bit different genre from what I usually read but a real delight. I like the vamps being different from cliche. I like the intriguing and unpredictable plot and the quirky characters. The only complaint I have is that I want to read more but the book run out. I hope there's going t...

About Us:

Inkitt is the world’s first reader-powered book publisher, offering an online community for talented authors and book lovers. Write captivating stories, read enchanting novels, and we’ll publish the books you love the most based on crowd wisdom.