Who Am I?

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the familial link between 'Rosemary's Baby' and 'Rosemary's Granddaughter' is explored by the San Rafael Nine...these Aztec Ghosts might be onto something. and the second part of the book answers the question of why do Gibbons weld lightsabers while eating lifesavers outside a Stater Brothers' market near Barstow. And why they left their Patlani's gravity generator on?

Scifi / Humor
David Estrada?
Age Rating:

Who am I?

Who Am I?

David Estrada

That this work may pay homage to the Blessed Trinity and for the benefit of all life…

Someone told me that nothing is impossible because the word impossible says: I’m Possible to which I replied; ‘Equality is Possible’.

…for My Family

They met in a medium-sized office adjacent to the library at the Dominican University of California, San Rafael, California. This office wasn’t quite a conference room but far larger than a single person office. They met in this office because an underground office might be much too cliché for a story of this type.

Maya Wells walked into the well-lit office with doors open. There are white curtains at the doors leading to the university courtyard…these curtains are flapping in the wind. There are members of the University staff gathered around a large wooden meeting table. The type of room these people are meeting in troubles you…I feel it too. It could be said that the room is a smaller adjunct classroom not only adjacent to the library but also opens to the main library and the courtyard. It is settled then, that this room is an adjunct classroom used by the assistant to the Dean of Library Science, Father Michael Rowan, as his personal office and work area for the others assembling for this noontime meeting.

Father Michael Rowan is the assistant to the Dean of Library Science and Macuiltochtli or Five Rabbit. Father Michael is standing at the whiteboard making notes. The University had just switched the dusty chalkboards for these clean whiteboards. Father Michael had five different colored dry erase markers in the tray at the bottom of the whiteboard on wheels with two sides. There was a black marker. There was a blue marker. There was a red marker. There was a green marker. And lastly, there was a purple marker. As Father Michael dropped the black marker, Father James Connors-Palin thought why his favorite color, yellow, was not represented among the colors of the markers in this office adjacent to the library at the Dominican University…

Father James works in the genetics laboratory. Father James was among the clergy possessed while praying the Rosary in the University’s chapel. Father James became one of the Aztec Ghost of Vice…Macuilcuetzpalin or Five Lizard.

“James,” Father Jacob Garb said. “There is no yellow because of the contrast of the color of the whiteboard and also the bright light pouring into the room…” Father Jacob is Macuilxochitl or Five Flower. The assistant to the dean of the Mathematics Department.

Sister Anne Xavier is also at the conference table. She works in the botany laboratory and appropriately she was possessed by Centzon Totochtin or Four Hundred Rabbit…

Sister Olivia Martin works in the genetics laboratory alongside Father Connors-Palin…Ometochtli or Two Rabbit.

Tobias Benjamin Coffin, Toby, the bartender from the Tavern in Menlo Park. is doing what comes naturally. Toby is pouring Whiskey…and Guinness to cut the edge on this discussion. Toby is Tepoztecatl…

Sister Magdalena Norris, Macuilmalinalli, Five Grass, is at the table and sipping on her Guinness after taking her shot of Whiskey. Sister Mary Michelle, Macuilcozcacuauhtli, Five Vulture, is serving lunch. Sister Mary Michelle is also giving Sister Magdalena an admonishing stare for drinking too quickly. Lunch…fried chicken, pizza, a green salad, mashed potatoes, gravy and some garlic bread which Toby dipped in Ketchup much to the amusement of Father Jacob.

Together they are the San Rafael Nine…Detective Maya Wells is Mayahuel.

Father Rowan sits down at the table after finishing writing on the whiteboard.

There were names on the board describing a family tree. Although Rosemary Woodhouse is married to Guy Woodhouse, Satan is listed as the father of Rosemary’s Baby, Adrian (Andrew, Andy) Woodhouse. Adrian is married to a June Cardiff-Woodhouse and mother to Jessica Woodhouse who uses a pseudonym of Jessica Andrews.

Lyrics and the titles of two popular songs are written on the board.

‘Who I Am’

“I’m Rosemary’s granddaughter, I’m a spitting image of my father…”

‘Sympathy for the Devil’

“Please allow me to introduce myself…”

And the title of the Roman Polanski movie ‘Rosemary’s Baby’.

Although these are fictional creations, I believe they are either testaments to the fealty to a ‘Dark Father’, i.e. Satan Worship or they are creations grounded in a reality that the family of Satan is alive and well…and prosperous in the Media.

Father Rowan is eating a thigh of fried chicken when Sister Anne Xaiver begins to speak.

“Father…” She is interrupted by Father Michael.

“I feel…” He begins to say with chicken in his mouth and washes it down with some Guinness. “I feel I am much more articulate and concise when I express myself in text form.”

This silences the group.

Detective Maya Wells begins to speak when most of the others have finished eating.

“We know things outside the realm of our imagination exist. We know there are thirty-five Aztec Ghosts possessing people because of the creation of Gravity Generators, the Zed Virus, and other technologies that we cannot readily explain. And now Father Michael is giving us a huge tip…some might call this a gamechanger.”

They sat in silence, contemplating the gravity of this new situation. It should be noted that they sat in near silence save for the sounds they made while the mastication process occurred.

Meanwhile, in a nearby converted warehouse apartment, Adrian Woodhouse lounged on a couch watching the golf or hockey. Adrian thought about all the assholes who were at Church or Mass for the Roman Catholics on Sunday mornings this time of the year when the NFL was offseason. All those lost souls who found God and brunch when they should skip all this salvation bullshit and breakout their crack pipes to help recover from last night’s cross-burning and lynching…

Adrian Woodhouse was all about his father’s work to convince the world that Satan doesn’t exist. Rosemary Woodhouse looks nothing like Mia Farrow…June Cardiff-Woodhouse was a dutiful wife and contrary to popular belief wearing black is to show one’s closeness with Jesus Christ and to mourn and celebrate his death and resurrection. But the Woodhouse family is quite cliché and so they wear black and Saint Peter’s Cross to perpetuate certain stereotypes. Like Mexicans who eat tacos not because they are delicious but because it is expected…or Arabs who eat shawarma or falafel…there is nothing delicious about ethnic food…

Jessica Andrews just left the apartment saying little about her departure.

Adrian Woodhouse was a proponent of anti-immigration. It was easy to ascertain his plan for the United States of America in the near future…First, build a wall between the United States of America and Estados Unidos Mexicanos…leaving some people to question why is the Canadian border so special that it doesn’t require the special attention Mexico requires. Then begin to repeal certain freedoms…religion being the first because of the inherent problem with Roman Catholics and Jews…their skin is not a clear indicator of their political leanings…as many of these people might be trouble and considered bleeding heart liberals as compassion, kindness, and brotherly love are not conservative values. Many of the most compassionate people someone might know is a doctor or lawyer from an immigrant family and many Jews, Muslim, Hindu, Asian, and Hispanic families might push their children born in the United States of America to seek education…Although like Shawn Hall, Adrian Woodhouse has Ethiopian neighbors who are nothing more than niggers who need to learn how to drive, Adrian uses many of the immigrants’ naivety for is profit…oh, wait that’s just like many people the author knows. And the Arab business owners are naïve and easily taken advantage of by pitting the Hispanic clerks against their bosses…the white power neighbors who run Adrian Woodhouse’s carpet cleaning company can get free petrol…by committing credit card fraud…and the kind Arab…or extremely ambitious immigrant small business owner comes under fire because his clerks commit credit card fraud…

And the gentle Arab boss is taken for a fool. They call him and his family Sandniggers behind his back and commit credit card fraud to cut corners on this one of many of the Woodhouse family’s neighborhood businesses. What seems like a small business is one of many of the fingers of a multinational corporation.

Adrian Woodhouse is a twentieth degree Scottish Rite Freemason…Adrian Woodhouse is the son of Rosemary Woodhouse…And Jessica Andrews is Rosemary’s granddaughter.

And honest Freemasons suffer. The network they rely on to create a beautiful world, Adrian Woodhouse and people like him us this same apparatus to organize crime…

What kind of Freemason pulls a gun on his neighbor to enforce Jim Crow laws or to force Zsa Zsa Gabor’s nephew given-up for adoption to join the Masons because of the money and opportunities for the other members…what kind of neighbors pull a gun on their neighbors because he wanted to get married when he was twenty-one…?

Today is Sunday in April and Adrian Woodhouse gives his businesses the day off. Managing carpet cleaning businesses isn’t one of Adrian’s normal duties. Matter of fact, no one in the Woodhouse family bothers with day to day business of running Woodhouse Holdings.

Today, across town…the San Rafael Nine is at Sunday mass…for the first time in a very long time, Maya Wells was confused as to genuflect or curtsy as she came into the Church. She bowed and made the sign of the cross almost forgetting to dip her finger in the Holy Water. She sat in the back even though Toby and Sister Anne Xavier motioned for Maya to sit with them closer to the Altar. Father Rowan was conducting the Mass. Father Garb sat next to Father Rowan while Father Connors-Palin was at another nearby parish or he was conducting the Mass later in the day…not everything is as simple as humans think things should be.

Maya Wells lives, stereotypically, alone…for a detective…drinking alone. Maya Wells uses Tinder so that while having a phallus inserted into her…or a ride down the licorice road, she can enjoy a man without developing feelings. Tinder is perfect seeing that many of the other Police Officers or Detectives are too sensitive and develop feelings, feelings which escaped from Maya Wells’ heart a long time ago and, in a galaxy, far, far away. Any feelings may jar Maya Wells’ heart from its frozen slumber…love might be too much of a distraction for her to handle. It seems Maya Wells is too cold to hold. Cuddling would be seen as a sign of affection.

If she falls in love and has her heartbroken, she would drink too much to drown these feelings of love and rejection. If she drinks too much and uses Tinder…she circumvents these feelings and quenches her appetite for penis and thirst for whiskey. These thoughts run through Maya’s mind as she sits in Toby’s tavern taking shots of whiskey with a chaser of Newcastle or ice water while thumbing through the Tinder application on her phone. Time travel could solve some of her problems if time travel is used to have sex with men on their way to old sparky…what about spending a couple of months in a French brothel in 1915…if she wasn’t so afraid of fucking up the timeline, Maya thought about eating some battalions of the German Army after letting them run a train on her.

Toby and Maya live about an hour car drive from the rest of the San Rafael Nine. Car drive? But all the Ghosts are only a thought away from one another and a medium-sized dog or three cats or rabbits away from tripping the light fantastic…

Many of the ghosts rarely travel through time so the need to feed upon the living is equally rare. As sad as it sounds many of the duties of the Animal Control Officers are usurped by these San Rafael Nine and the other Ghosts…in some areas Animal Shelters are empty. And the lady animal control officers double as in-home on-call adult dancers…much like most junior cadets after their fake graduations as part of their training to work undercover on the vice squad.

After Mass that Sunday morning in April, they sat in the Tavern in Menlo Park. Toby expected that the Tavern and wait staff would be overwhelmed by the amount of business. It was April and there was no football but hockey and the Final Four was the draw that Sunday in April. Knowing that most people in the Tavern would not be paying attention to what the other patrons were talking about, Toby thought his tavern was a good place as any to discuss the rather macabre matter on today’s agenda.

In the past three weeks, the bodies of missing children were found in the chimneys of Bay Area residents.

“What connects these cases…” Maya began to speak and draw on a composition notepad as was there style when meeting in public and access to a chalkboard or whiteboard was not available. And if these boards were available, they would hinder the San Rafael Nine’s anonymity and effectiveness.

“The victims…the missing children…” She says looking around. “They are being found in the chimneys of other victims. They are being found in pairs. And all the children that have disappeared in the last year have been found.”

Father Rowan began to speak.

Father Rowan began to speak a bit under his breath…

“Like an Edgar Allen Poe story…The Murders in the Rue Morgue.” At this moment for an odd reason, Father Rowan thought of a confession he heard of a woman who caught her husband, a police detective, having homosexual sex with his partner after shooting heroin.

“Thank you, Toby…” Maya spoke. “For letting us meet here today.” She began to address the rest of the group. “I brought this case to Toby a couple of days ago. It seems that these killings are done much like Michael said are reminiscent of Poe’s story and some of the paraphernalia seems to indicate a mockery of Christmas. Not merely the birth of Christ but the traditions and merriments. Bows binding the hands and feet…Nutcracker Soldiers, tinsel in their teeth like floss, GI Joes for the boys, and Barbie dolls for the girls among other toys stuffed into either a Sanrio or Jansport backpack…coal was placed into their mouths.”

Maya had a grave look on her face.

A tear formed in Sister Olivia’s eye as their food and the second round of drinks was set before them. Maya put away her notepad. They had no real leads and if they were to go back in time to prevent the abductions, a different child would be taken instead. They could use their powers to surveil and investigate based on watching and waiting.

“The children were dressed as if they were making their First Communion. The little girls dressed in white dresses and boys in suits and ties. The placement of the bodies was as such that the children were jumping feet first into the chimneys with no shoes. And Chimney Sweeps found each child in this most gruesome way. Woodhouse holdings did own a franchise Chimney Sweep company and those were the Chimney Sweeps who found the innocents…Mary Poppins had less to be worried about soot stains tarnishing her reputation than the bloodstains of these innocent children.” Maya took a shot of whiskey and many of her newfound colleagues followed suit.

“Adrian Woodhouse bought the rights to name the army of Chimney Sweeps; ‘Chim Chim Cher-oo’ from Disney. And now they are involved in this murderous affair.” She took a moment to eat some of the fried mozzarella sticks and chicken tenders Toby had placed in the middle of the table along with some fried potatoes and tortilla chips and guacamole.

“According to the police reports, twenty children went missing from around the Bay Area of Northern California. They went missing in November and December. They were found by Chimney sweeps in April. They all were killed, embalmed, and placed inside the chimneys of their family’s home. All the children had houses with chimneys. There was nothing to connect the abductions together until the bodies were found in the chimneys of other victims.

Over one hundred thousand children went missing in California last year. This accounts for runaways, family abduction, stranger abduction, lost, missing after a catastrophe, suspicious or unknown circumstances…these twenty bodies represent a drop in the ocean of missing children in California. I want to reiterate that there was no connection among the victims until the bodies were found in the other victims’ chimneys. The diameter of the chimney was about one foot. These children were all about six or seven years old and their waists and shoulders were small enough to allow their bodies to be placed into the chimneys.” Maya spoke looking at the faces of the clergy gathered around her. She paused to drink a bit of water…

“Another one of Woodhouse Holdings companies may be involved…their maid service. It is the only business that could account for being trusted with keys to each home and being in the home while the victims were away. The coal in their mouths was Kingsford briquettes carefully sliced so to maintain a wafer shape. These children were kept alive until a week before being placed into the chimney.”

“Maya,” Sister Anne Xavier interrupted… “Do you have some agenda against the Woodhouse family? I know Michael had brought up his theory that Adrian Woodhouse is Rosemary’s baby, I mean how are we to believe that a businessman is the son of Satan and the movie and music aren’t just a coincidence.”

“Sister Anne, thank you for bringing that up…I told Father Rowan about the Chimney Sweep company finding the bodies. He came up with the theory and like he said…we are earthly representations of the Aztec Gods and every fiber of my being wants me to clarify by saying we are Ghosts and that I am certain that my Faith in God is based in a reality that I cannot fully understand. So…we are at war with the Son of Satan and this is his handy work. This is the best theory we could come up with.” Maya finished.

“I think we all feel the call from the Blessed Trinity even stronger now that we have become Ghosts or Aztecs…and I just have my doubts like the rest of us.” Sister Anne Xavier ate a bit of salad that Toby had sent out. “Why else would I feel so strongly to call myself a Ghost, not a god…”

Maya put the papers back in the folder and into a messenger bag she had with her. She pulled out two flash drives. She handed them to Sister Magdalena who kept one and gave the other to Father Michael.

“I have the same data on my phone and that is the same papers and pictures that I just placed in my bag.” They finished their discussion, lunch, and drinks. By that time, it was early in the evening and a breeze blew the trees and leaves fell and glittered in the western sunset. These San Rafael Nine worried about fouling up the timeline, so they planned out their excursion into the past with great caution.

It was unspoken among them that the gift bows used to bind the body, the backpacks filled with toys, and the coal hinted to something more gruesome to come at Christmastime. These crimes made a mockery of the innocence of Christmas to a child.

Due to the nature of the Aztec Space/Time Travel, the San Rafael Nine had to be true to their name…Ghosts. They would only watch for the perpetrators and their methods. Until every detail of the crime and the criminals were known and the Ghosts would only be passive observers. If they were to act as participant observers, they might risk altering the timeline by their participation. Their observation alone would change some of the History but not enough to change the timeline or alter the creation of the gravity generators, the Zed retrovirus, and their creations.

What was discovered was the careful Christmas wrapping made of mylar…that the bodies were placed into the chimneys by the maid service owned by Woodhouse Holdings.

Somewhere, toward the end of July, the San Rafael Nine decided that their best bet was to wait until Christmas for this whole scenario to play out. Near that time David Estrada…it was either Tlaloc or Tezcatlipoca…it was hard to tell because he had traveled by bus after traveling through Space/Time to meet us in Toby’s Tavern in Menlo Park. We told him what we had been working on and among all the Ghosts present in Menlo Park, California and living within Space/Time that September was a good month to relocate the Classical Mayan civilization to the Planet in orbit around the star in the constellation of Lyra. For that month in 1998, the Ghost Project would be focused on relocating the Classical Maya to the aforementioned planet with an incredibly long and unnecessarily descriptive name.

While we were helping the Maya…before the fall of the Classical Mayan civilization. We ate some tamales. We gave into our ghastly desires and ate living people. And we used our Patlanis to take some of the indigenous people to that planet in the constellation of Lyra. And before the fall of their civilization, we inoculated them and relocated them.

I ate tamales and drank pulque…most of us thought pulque was a drink of Aztec origin. I was but Father Rowan and Tobias brought the recipe with them and enlisted the help of the indigenous in the production. I was haunted by visions of these little victims wrapped like tamales or Christmas Crackers with a bow at each end and a surprise inside. And what troubled me more was that it seemed these children were not only…only children but their parents were contemplating divorce. Like the conundrum facing King Solomon and two parents ripping apart their children because sharing your life is already hard enough when a couple gets married and has a child…and then two selfish people fight over keeping a child instead of fighting to keep their family together.

There are lots of reasons that marriages die…

I feel dirty thinking of the victims like tamales or Christmas Crackers and that seems to be what the person who is orchestrating these murders wants me to feel…

I sat on the steps of Tikal…thinking this. Upon returning to 1998, I and the other Ghosts who comprise the San Rafael Nine sat in Toby’s tavern. We had done enough research to know how these crimes were committed. We didn’t need to see what was coming at Christmastime to know what might stop these crimes from being committed.

We know for certain that Jessica Woodhouse uses the Stage name of Jessica Andrews and Rosemary Woodhouse is her grandmother. Jessica Woodhouse is the granddaughter of Satan. She is a spitting image of her father because the docudrama ‘Rosemary’s Baby’ mislead the audience to believe that Satan looks like a Fawn or a Pan-like character…Satan was an angel and he could look just like a normal human. Whatever normal is…I’m sure normal is a setting on a washing machine and human behavior is much more complex. But Adrian Woodhouse looks like a man. English-French American ancestry…Adrian Woodhouse looks like a man June Cardiff wanted to introduce her father too.

And so how do you stop a family of self-important megalomaniacs or more importantly how do we thwart the granddaughter of a Satan from carrying out these most gruesome murders?

“We need to make Jessica Andrews the hottest act in the entertainment industry,” I said…and who am I? I, your narrator, am Sister Magdalena Norris. I held a drumstick of fried chicken in my right hand and a pint of Newcastle in my left hand. “If the idiom is true…Satan finds work for Idle Hands, then let’s make her so busy…”

They all looked at me. I was waiting for the laughter to begin but the others sat in awe of such a simple…

“Ingenious plan…” Maya Wells said. Father Michael Rowan’s mouth was slightly ajar as he looked for his pint and raised it.

Vox populi vox Dei…” Father Rowan said as he stood at the table. The others stood slowly and I was the last and again in unison, we repeated… “Vox populi vox Dei”.

And it was decided in the morning we would eat brunch courtesy of the Department of Animal Control and begin manipulating the Entertainment industry to keep Jessica Andrews more concerned with musical pursuits and less concerned with infamy as the Murderous Mary Poppins.

And so, it began, and the kidnappings in 1997 never happened. The twenty dead children never died and their parents stayed together with a little meddling from the San Rafael Nine. Jessica Andrews (Woodhouse) became a sensation in American Country music in 1999. For several years she was so busy she could not be worried about completing her father’s work…touring and recording.

And there we were in 2001…September Eleventh, 2001 was the work of the granddaughter of Satan. She convinced George W Bush to enlist the help of the Klu Klux Klan and radical Muslims to overthrow the American Government. They say politics make strange bedfellows…but this was an event that could not be changed because of the implications of the creation of the Zombie Protected Zone, the Zed Retro-Virus, and the Gravity Generators. YouTube released a video of Klansmen on the terror attacks released by innocent Muslims trying to clarify involvement. It was the only thing that the Ghosts could do that wouldn’t jeopardize the timeline that had created the technology that created the Zeds and the Ghosts. The Klan helped lead the military coup de tat against the US government.

During the Kingdom of America years, the San Rafael Nine laid low and let the Zed mob handle the American restoration to sanity…or This is the fight for the Republican System of Democracy. Kakistocracy established by George W Bush? Sadly…no? George W Bush was replaced by Adrian Woodhouse and Jessica in all the commotion of the Terror attacks George W Bush was kidnapped by the Klu Klux Klan and his likeness was digitized. King Bush was a computer graphics image in the hands of the Son of Satan. Osama bin Laden was a puppet of Adrian Woodhouse. Keeping Jessica occupied with her musical career might help overthrow the cartoon antics of George W Bush’s likeness being controlled by Rosemary’s Baby but the events that tore democracy apart didn’t stop Jessica from starting a cult…Jim Jones style.

She went to French Guiana in the spring of 2003. Unbeknownst to most of the population of anywhere, the ‘Z’ was sending volunteers into space and possibly Mars. It had become fashionable for White Supremacists to quote ‘Men are from Mars and Hitler is a Raelian’ as a way to avoid hate crimes when putting swastikas on synagogues claim to be a Raelian. Most Rabbis know better but it’s worth a shot. The white power movement in La Mirada and East Whitter had converted to…I guess Raelism. Raelism isn’t the belief that Adolf Hitler escaped in “Die Glocke”…crash landing in Kecksberg Pennsylvania and coming to Texas in the mid-1960s to dance and get laid, is much more popular with White Supremacists who also claim to be La Mirada Clowns…or anything where they can continue to extort money from the Hepburn family and cover up the murder of a police officer in 1980 in Anaheim California in front of a liquor store near Acacia and La Palma. And the police help these neo-Nazi Raelians cover up the murder of a police officer because he was dark-skinned Hispanic…Just like Raelians, Assclown’s family name comes from Zurich, Switzerland.

Jessica Andrews sat next to Matthew Poliakov on the plane ride to French Guiana who shared his vast knowledge of putting swastikas on synagogues as part of his devotion to Raelism. His copy of ‘Men are from Mars and Hitler is a Raelian’ laid on his lap as he slept. (Actual Raelism is more enlightened than Neo-Nazism.) Matthew was leading a group of assclowns to French Guiana to spread the love of assclowns…the Poliakov family are social chameleons putting on any identity to distort society. Matthew Poliakov gets music from websites run by the Klu Klux Klan and regularly goes to Aryanfest to celebrate White Supremacy but when the police ask questions, he squeezes his red nose and everyone laughs because Civil Rights are a joke. White Power is the American God…

Many of the Assclowns will get on the rocket bound for the international space station. The ‘Z’ constituents wanted to have a certain number of Zeds to humans bound for Mars. The Assclowns are unaware that the ‘Z’ know that Jessica Andrews is trying to get her friends of Hitler on Mars.

Poliakov and many of his fellow assclowns get on the rocket after the three weeks of preparation but Jessica Andrews and many of the Zeds stay behind and watch many assclowns go up in smoke…. The KKK in space got as far as Sally Ride. Five hundred assclowns went pop goes the weasel while listening to Johnny Rebel and clutching their Mein Kompf.

Poliakov like many people is an opportunist and the greatest thing white supremacy can do is convince you it doesn’t exist. Maybe Jessica Andrews and Adrian Woodhouse did something good when they blew up those Astro-Nazi Assclowns…

The San Rafael Nine explored the idea that we would kidnap any child born from Adrian Woodhouse’s jism but after Jessica Andrews showed these assclowns the door, we had to rethink our approach. Maybe Rosemary’s Granddaughter wasn’t so bad.

“…or maybe she knows that we could thwart her ungodly enterprises using time travel…” Sister Anne Xavier said. “and wants to ingratiate her and her family to us. To use our good nature against us.” I agreed. Just because she rid the world of five hundred assclowns doesn’t make her a saint. She killed five hundred Neo-Nazis who often claim to be Raelians just to get away with hate crimes? If she had told the Raelians that these Nazis were conveniently converting as to make all Raelians look like Nazi Assclowns with a love of Ancient Aliens…?

“Does the Son of Satan have Daddy Issues?” Father Rowan asked as we sat in a semiprivate room of the Tavern in Menlo Park California.

“Maybe this was just a one-time thing.” Sister Anne expressed as Toby asked the wait staff to bring snacks after they prayed the Rosary. Joey the dishwasher locked the door and turned off the open sign. Most of the staff of the Tavern knew to pray the Rosary and there is something special about Toby and the others besides being Clergy, teachers, and administrators at the University. They just couldn’t put their finger on it.

“What if Jessica is acting independently?” I interjected.

“Jessica has issues with Adrian Woodhouse.”

“I think…Toby might be on to something.” Father James said holding his rosary as we and the rest of the staff began to pray the Rosary beginning with the Apostles Creed.

“I believe in God,

the Father almighty,

Creator of heaven and earth,

and in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord,

who was conceived by the Holy Spirit,

born of the Virgin Mary,

suffered under Pontius Pilate,

was crucified, died and was buried;

he descended into hell;

on the third day, he rose again from the dead;

he ascended into heaven,

and is seated at the right hand of God the Father almighty;

from there he will come to judge the living and the dead.

I believe in the Holy Spirit,

the holy catholic Church,

the communion of saints,

the forgiveness of sins,

the resurrection of the body,

and life everlasting.

Amen…” and it went this way each day especially when the San Rafael Nine met to discuss the course of action concerning the Woodhouse family.

No one pays much attention to the backside of an exit door. The same could be said with the door on the planet in orbit around the star in the constellation of Lyra. The door is in a north-south alignment. At the time near the end of time when the clock is 9:07, the door opens to the south and the Aztec or the crew of the Patlani enter moving north and the universe envelopes them as they pass through the door to their destination.

No one thought to inspect the outside of an exit door. Even now at the Monster Mash, no one thinks to look at the side of the door that faces the north when the door opens up the only way to pass is to go north. But today, John Jameson inspects and takes pictures of that side of the door. The door and its frame float about a foot or so above the desert floor. The head jamb, the sill, and the side jambs make something more like a picture frame. The frame is metal. And although there are grains in what looks like wood, it is stone of petrified and the wood was carved with hieroglyphs before the wood was petrified.

Most of the Maya live on other parts of the planet and have adjusted very well. They have also been taught many things that make them of great help to the Ghosts and others on the planet with the door and the floating digital clock.

The hieroglyphs are not K’iche or Egyptian…they are lines…like Kanji, katakana or hiragana but they are not. Each glyph is about the size of the average of a human hand something like seven by five inches. Each glyph is about this rectangular size where the middle of the glyph is in the center of this area. There is no carved border. The door is eighty inches tall by thirty-six inches wide. There are eleven glyphs vertically and six horizontally, making a total of sixty-six glyphs.

They look like a mixture of Kanji, katakana, star symbols, stick men, spirals and circles…with this in mind no one can be sure that the Kanji and katakana hold the meaning humans give them. It seems the door was carved and then petrified. And if teachers are like doors then maybe there is a teacher who is petrified out of fear or was open to getting stoned and no longer able to keep his place.

In one of the monster mash buildings, there is a dry erase board that makes up the whole wall and one of the linguists has transcribed the glyphs from the pictures onto the wall.

Some of the Maya priests and linguists scrutinize the meaning of the glyphs and the Ghosts cannot think to go back so far in time when the door was being made to ask the meaning out of fear, they may not be able to return.

The San Rafael Nine met with the other Ghosts to ask them for some advice as to any course of action concerning Jessica Andrews. There may be the possibility to create a schism in their unholy family.

Tlaloc stood near me and Father Rowan.

“I think with the hijacking the world, blaming the work of this unholy family on innocent Muslims, and this backlash that has created the atmosphere that created the Z and the Ghosts…maybe Jessica has no stomach for her grandfather’s work. Or she sees that the grander the evil, the natural good in the hearts of humanity will respond in kind. Where the Woodhouse family brings genocide…a savior will spring forth.”

Toby was nearby…

“The little acts of evil create dissension among the population but one great act of evil brings compassion out of every reasonable person’s breath until the last breath or the last act of compassion heals the population.” Toby is quite the philosopher…

“Like the little whisper that gets one person to steal a candy bar… like lying on a bed of nails. Or stabbing a million people with a million little needles. Like the mustard seed…”

And they understood that the seed is unassuming and at the beginning poses no threat. One candy bar doesn’t bankrupt a business but if each customer stole once per day the theft would add up…

“Jessica would rather do the small evil that doesn’t draw international attention and might lead to wave upon wave of evil like a revolution like a population of the insane who were just moments before considered reasonable people.” Father Rowan finished.

“Whereas a huge event of evil or terrorism may unite people who help their fellow man…the slow wave of evil may convince people that what is happening or what they are doing is good…in the long run and for the common good.”

“Like convincing a nation of immigrants to favor policies that seem anti-immigrant or favor a population of immigrants from countries with better economies and thus less crime…” Everyone looked at Father Rowan. Like why is an unguarded Canadian border okay where the border with Mexico is a militarized zone? Or why actors born in La Canada or Flintridge have fake stage identities saying they are from Canada…Angelinos or Canucks? Keep immigrants White…so anyone coming to America from Africa has to be royalty to afford the immigration fees. What attraction does the United States have to middle-class Germans? Middle-Class German streets are already paved in gold.

And to my embarrassment, I spoke… “At the end of Julius Caesar when all the Roman Senate stabs the Caesar…”

Et tu Brute…” Sister Xavier interrupted.

“No. Imagine all the damage they could have done by stabbing other people. Like one stab per person. What there were one hundred senators they could have stabbed one hundred Roman Citizens. They would have spread around the pain and misery.”

Et tu puella,” Sister Xavier said.

“You think about this a lot.” Father Palin-Connors said.

Maya Wells our inside lady…Menlo Park’s Finest, Detective Maya Wells began to tell us about murders that were either mob-style killings or a serial killer’s manifesto painted in the blood of…seemingly innocent and unconnected…victims.

“The only thing that ties these people together is their family connections to a European style highspeed railway system connecting the West Coast…” We were seated at a table in Toby’s Tavern where Maya pulled out a notepad and began to put pen to paper and those of us who had iPhones began to take pictures of the illustrations for future reference. “Many of these victims are relatives of the architects, state and federal planners. Doing such a thing may slow or even stop this railway system altogether. But until Sister Magdalena went off on her rant, I didn’t understand the plan’s final end…I think Rosemary’s Granddaughter wants to create chaos with chaos being the goal.”

And this is where it is odd for me, Sister Magdalena Norris, quiet and sweet to talk about what was happening. But I felt so liberated…to let out the bad girl in me…to serve God and Man…

There is always a jargon or double-speak one may use when one specializes in the esoteric criminal arts. Maya began to explain that Jessica hired someone to paint houses? In a world where a painter uses a Glock Forty or a snub-nosed Saturday Night Special as their media. And so, the mode of the art was murder and blood splatter. The unknown killer is a regular Van Gogh and it seems he was hired to do something much grander than just a character study of impoverished farmers eating potatoes. While Michelangelo was famous and celebrated throughout Europe, the man who was commissioned by the rogue Woodhouse daughter is a ghost…a phantom who is leaving his handiwork to speak for itself. But the vast work is just as awe-inspiring as the Sistine Chapel but it was no Man of God who requested the creation of this masterpiece.

We had come to the conclusion that Jessica Andrews was now acting independently to undermine human civilization… When Jesus said that we are the salt of the earth he didn’t just mean that we add spice to life but that we preserve civilization for future generations… and It seems that while the Lord wants us to live in harmony and to keep the path straight Rosemary’s Granddaughter wants to do her Grandfather’s work. It seems that maybe the only disagreement is in their policy. Where Adrian Woodhouse wants to create huge acts of chaos…Jessica wants to encourage small acts of chaos that build into something larger and can be sustained by the people who now can’t see their part in a larger more sinister outcome. These peoples’ actions are deemed distrustful at best. Like one person stabbing one person…on each street corner in an entire nation. Such an act might seem like nothing at first but when the larger picture unfolds such an act might plunge the country into chaos as the emergency is too great for the emergency responders to handle…

Now we are dealing with a painter whose goal is a world painted in blood. The targets are siblings and their immediate family of the designers of this railway system. Instead of bombing the trains and their passengers on their christening day, this regular Van Gogh is making house calls. A mother in the bath listening to classical music with bath bombs and aromatherapy candles has her mind blown onto the tile as her kids don’t have to do homework anymore and her husband doesn’t have to worry about cooking or takeout…

The victims are the siblings of the men and women working on this West Coast and possibly national highspeed railway system. Keeping that in mind many of these victims live across the country if not the world. So, no connection appears until six or seven houses have been painted. San Diego… Montreal… Seattle… Kansas City… New York… and perhaps now you see the full extent. Architects and engineers come from just about anywhere. They came from around the world to design the West Coast’s high-speed railway. Amtrak would shift some of their trains over to the new hybrid electric-diesel locomotives. General Electric and Siemens were in competition over who would win the contract. The concept was based on tracks that conducted electricity to power the high-speed engine away from the metropolitan area, where at a certain distance the diesel engine would take over and although the diesel engine was slower the kinetic energy would carry the train at higher speeds. The idea was like how a rollercoaster is either pushed up or out of the station and gravity carries it downhill on the tracks. The electric engine would carry passengers at over one hundred miles per hour away from the city and slow to seventy-five miles per hour it would save time and fuel until the whole railway could be wired or biodiesel locomotive technology could be worked out. Being that Siemens and General Electric were both international companies the architects and engineers…the scientists came from around the globe. It is infantile to think that only European or American minds are fit to grasp and mold the future one technological innovation at a time.

Many of the scientists began to be called away from their work by the funerals of their loved ones. Many relocated from laboratories in Europe, the Middle East, Quebec, New England, Africa or South America to help tailor the railway for the West Coast of the United States of America with connection to Las Vegas and future expansion to the rest of North America.

Guillermo González Camarena was a Mexican electrical engineer who was the inventor of a color-wheel type of color television, and who also introduced color television to the world. Keeping that in mind Mexico, Canada, and the United States of America were working together to build this high-speed rail system. It seems that was the problem. Some people want to build bridges with others while some build walls keeping certain people out is far more desirable. Sabotaging this rail system that connected people was important when revolutionary ideas would be carried by people who could travel easier. It’s one thing to send a letter or an email but to visit another city, region or country is the connection of one’s heart and mind to a community that someone’s socio-economic status forbade them to even dream about…

How many inner-city Angelinos think about going to Alaska or learning French to visit Quebec? This railway system may make it imaginable…

Jessica Andrews hired a painter. Whoever it was had enough tickets or money to buy plane tickets…whoever it was had connections to obtain a Glock forty in London or a snub-nosed Saturday night special in Mexico City. This was his first art exhibition. And to cover his tracks he torched the house or apartment. It didn’t matter if the arson was apparent, much of the physical forensic evidence was gone in the fire. Hair, muddy or bloody shoe prints, fingerprints were all lost in the fire along with little Jen Jen’s favorite DVD of Prince’s Purple Rain. The album played on her computer as Van Gogh expressed his feeling in blood and grey matter according to her iTunes account. Purple Rain was the last song playing on the computer. This fact on her iTunes account was the only evidence of this masterpiece Portland, Oregon before the fire consumed Jen Jen and her family who were intrinsically priceless works of art. The DVD was also lodged in the DVD player…Many of the Ghosts went to the scene of each crime to watch and by this time we realized that distracting Jessica Andrews with pop culture stardom would never be quite enough. I, Sister Magdalena Norris, went to these crime scenes…and I made the children disappear kidnapping them just before Vincent came into the room. I convinced the others to do the same but we couldn’t stop the Van Gogh altogether. And the Identity of this regular Van Gogh was inconsequential…If Jessica was stopped, she would move onto something else and at this time Adrian Woodhouse control King George Bush. Like a psychotic Maxx Headroom with doubles to make speeches written with the approval of Adrian Woodhouse…if she was caught by the police, she would get a Presidential Pardon and if we kidnapped her or switched her at birth, her replacement would be just as evil answering the nature versus nurture. She was just as evil as her father raised her to be.

The best we could do was to kidnap the children moments before they were to be killed by Van Gogh and the kidnappings would be credited to the painter who wouldn’t paint nurseries or teenagers’ bedrooms with the blood of innocence. The children in some cases would find themselves in the middle of a soccer match a few days later, at a friend’s doorstep or in the school nurses’ office before the school nurse got to work. There were only one or two extreme cases where the children kept on the planet with the mysterious door in orbit around one star in the constellation of Lyra.

Little Jenifer who was already a strange teenager for liking Prince at her age in 2003 found herself in the closet of her cousin at her aunt’s home in Los Angeles. She had no idea how she got there…she only remembered she was watching ‘Purple Rain’ on DVD for the thousandth time.

This masterpiece kept the San Rafael Nine busy until in summer of 2005 the plans for the railway were scrapped as many of the top engineers submitted their work and quit believing that caring for these orphaned nieces and nephews is a top priority or thinking their work led to the murders of their loved ones. The plans and trains themselves were never quite finished and never quite up to snuff…in the parlance of a time-traveling nun.

Toby lives in Menlo Park near the Tavern. He has an apartment above the bar which is kept as an office and extended breakroom. There is a murphy bed…Desk with a laptop computer and a filing cabinet for tax records and other business documents that need to stay in paper form. There is a flat-screen television and many DVDs. A toilet with shower is adjacent so that anyone making use of the apartment can keep clean. Toby has a DVD collection and unbeknownst to many of us, he is an avid Marlee Matlin fan. I, Sister Magdalena Norris want to apologize for the next page or two…and I think people like Marlee Matlin give inspiration to many people showing us that they are as perfect and wonderful as anyone else and everyone should practice compassion.

Among the DVDs were some Happy Valentine movies and another of her costars looks just like Marlee Matlin and to capitalize and even exploit this fact her stage name is Mumbles Conlodedos…I know in many of these pornographic movies the actors’ stage name has some special often hidden meaning like Happy Valentine brings thoughts of lustful romantic feelings people often express in the sanctity of the Sacrament of Marriage. Saint Valentine was a martyr who despite Roman Law married Christians even though this meant he would be killed.

Mumbles Conlodedos and Happy Valentine made several Gangster themed Adult movies. In one of her most famous rolls in the hay, Mumbles Conlodedos was a union leader who was trying to organize sex workers to fight for better pay in the underground red-light district of Las Vegas. It was titled ‘A Working Girl Earns Her Marx’…

“Toby…” I said holding the DVD in my hand, “do you ever visit the pop in to see the live version?”

Toby’s face turned red from embarrassment. Not just the embarrassment that a nun may be admonishing him for watching pornographic movies but the embarrassment that I know he has used his abilities to visit the set…

What could I say while all of the Ghosts were relocating the Classical Mayan many of us indulged in our Blood Lust and ate our fill of people in order to tidy up other affairs that needed our special abilities? Many of the Classical Mayan needed to die and disappear mysteriously, so eating a few of them isn’t like we were eating the innocents or killing the Maya who were not overpopulated warmongers. But I have heard it a thousand times humans can rationalize the most irrational things. Or like the Wise Owl said how many wrongs does it take to get to the Center of a Tootsie Pop…or was it How many lefts does one take before they get it right? Something like that?

Although we stopped Jessica Andrews’ demented Christmas Scheme, we could not interfere with some of her and Adrian Woodhouse’s more grand acts of evil because of their interconnection with the creation of the Gravity Generator, the McGill Device, the Zed Retro Virus, and the creation of the Ghosts who make time travel possible without having to relive a scene only imagined by the Marquis de Sade, and partially portrayed in the Movie ‘Event Horizon’…or was that Salo or Justine…no, no, it had a space ship…like Hellraiser but in space…boldly going where the Marquis de Sade never imagined? Was Galileo’s cellmate the Marquis de Sade?

But coming back to our reality, Toby and I walked down the stairs back into the tavern to talk of other things. We knew somethings in the future of the end of the Kingdom of America…Mesi Misri and the McGill device. King Bush and King Edward…Most of the population had no idea that King George Bush was a double being controlled by Adrian Woodhouse.

2009, November Fifth…I text the other San Rafael Nine and then I text the Ghost Project. As the San Rafael Nine were in the past? Right…how was that working today. In 2005…

I left my room in the convent near the Dominican University in San Rafael, California. It was the middle of the night and it had been some days since I was speaking with Toby and the others at the Tavern in Menlo Park. And so, we must wait to place all the key figures in the right places at the right time…like tossing the garbage into a fire when one is camping so that one may dispose of the garbage and keep warm…

We can deal with Adrian Woodhouse and free George W to live in hiding kept safe by the Ghost Program…maybe importing tacos from the Zona de Silencio to the planet with the mysterious door in orbit around the star in the constellation of Lyra to put his feet in the sand with a Newcastle in one hand and the aforementioned taco in the other hand sitting next to John Jameson…

It seems to this nun that November Fifth, 2009 might become a dumping ground for the incineration of history’s undesirables. All this hubbub with Jessica Andrews reminds me of a quote from Nostradamus about ‘Hister’ and I think that maybe all these Nostradamus freaks overlook that ‘hyster’ in Greek means womb and the second anti-Christ could be a woman or all Women are the second Anti-Christ…the popularity of abortions makes me wonder…

Beasts ferocious with hunger will cross the rivers,

The greater part of the battlefield will be against Hister.

Into a cage of iron will the great one be drawn,

When the child of Germany observes nothing.

This point of view brings new meaning to the ‘Battle of the Sexes’…

Perhaps when Michel de Nostredame looked into his scrying bowl, he saw the face of Jessica Andrews staring back at him. I often think the greater part of the battlefield is against Women’s Rights. And when thinking about the children of Germany seeing nothing brings homophonic messages concealed only for the truly initiated to decipher…the blind…the action of not seeing becomes Nazi…the child of Germany observes nothing becomes the German Nazi’s indoctrination of the entire population beginning with the children.

But did Nostradamus think his work would be translated into English? It isn’t much of a stretch keeping in mind Dunkirk is only a mere twenty-one miles from Dover…and the Royalty of Europe is all descended from the Germanic family of King George the Second and there is a difference between English and British…the Anglo-Saxons are a Germanic tribe that forced out the Celtic…the Gaelic…both Insular Celts and Continental Celts have no place in the Germanic world.

As a little girl I overheard some high school age kids talking about how I lived in a Haunted House and now because of the color of my skin I know what they were trying to say but my family never kept their Ghost costumes on wooden hangers. Sometimes hoods conceal the identity of the Klansmen and sometimes the ’hood conceals the identity of the ’Man…

The Max Headroom-esque George W Bush was the mask Adrian Woodhouse was hiding behind. And Jessica (Woodhouse) Andrews was hiding behind her music both concealing their partnership in the work of the Earthly Family of Satan.

The immature monsters Venom and Karnage have been in the media lately. Although many people view them as evil, the rest of the Ghosts think of them as part of our family. Like the Munster’s extended family not so much like Monsters. Venom’s host body is a photographer in the bay area. The Files family is still raising Karnage as little Kassidy Files, sweet, spicy, and everything that makes Kassidy the perfect host for Karnage who wants to stay hidden. Both Kassidy and Karnage know the Ghosts, intimately. We Ghosts know how to find them and what they are thinking and doing. Kassidy will be twelve at the time of the incident at the Capital. And as far as the Ghost Project is concerned Karnage and Venom are like our younger cousins. They need to be looked out for…protected and trained. But we are unsure as to their future abilities to travel through Space/Time but their bodies need to feed on the living or they will consume their hosts.

Kassidy Files and her family still live in Massachusetts.

I kept thinking about depositing the Woodhouse family in the ‘Event of November Fifth, 2009’ as the means to end Satan’s Earthly family. Then this lady of the cloth…began to think something most foul. We Ghosts need the flesh of living beings to travel through Time/Space… Many people are going to die in the ’Event of November Fifth, 2009… Much like the relocation of the Classical Mayan, we could either feed upon these people or relocate many to Mexico’s Zone of Silence into the Ghost Project or onto the planet in orbit around the star in the constellation of Lyra.

Somewhere under the Zona de Silencio, the Ghost Project was experimenting with apes…namely the lesser ape known as the Gibbon. The Gibbon doesn’t come from the Santa Ana zoo but is a native of the tropical rainforests of southeast Asia. Xander Weiss had been transferred from the Zombie Protected Zone to the Zona de Silencio, not because of his interest in authentic tacos from Chihuahua Mexico but because he talked Venom and his host to join the Ghost Project. It seems that the Rhesus Antigen Factor in White Handed Gibbons makes them ideal for use in the Ghost and Zombie Project. The Rhesus Antigen Factor is the negative or positive part of your blood type. Like O Negative or A Positive…being that eighty-five percent of the human population is Rhesus Antigen Factor Positive or Rh-positive isn’t a question of whipping those people with Rh-negative blood types out of existence when one acknowledges that ninety percent of the World’s geniuses are Rh-negative. And the Zed retro-virus is lethal to humans who are Rh-positive…so fifteen percent of the World’s population can successfully become a Zombie. It never makes sense why Jujuba ‘Joe’ Woods thought to call himself a Zombie was the best nomenclature for the infection. But here we are a Roman Catholic Nun who is an Aztec Ghost… Space/Time Travelling, a clusterfuck that ends with the clones of the creator of the Zed Virus and Space/Time Travel ripping a gaping hole in the whole of existence turning the universe inside out and the conclusion of the universe becomes the introduction.

Contrary to popular belief a crescendo isn’t the end of a song but a notation to slowly increase the volume of the music at any point in the musical piece.

Sometimes a crescendo is better than one of these people who leave the volume up on his car stereo and when he turns the car on again scares the shit out of the unsuspecting passengers. Which is far kinder than going to a college party in Whittier California and having assclowns put the business end of a Glock forty to your forehead because they came to enforce Jim Crow Laws… White Supremacy in Southern California is more tangible than a Tony Kaye movie but I’m sure these people who live east of Shoemaker and north Rosecrans will say they were just doing research or some authors would have nothing to write about if these assclowns hadn’t threatened to have their friends killed for violating Jim Crow Laws.

There are a great many things right with the United States of America like the Statue of Liberty welcoming immigrants to our nation not to be confused with the Statue of Hitler telling Non-Aryan immigrants to fuck off and die…it was too expensive to build that statue so the American government made it nearly impossible for immigrants from non-industrialized nations to come to “El Dorado”…but there are no streets of gold in the United States of America.

There is a great number of beautiful and courageous people willing to fight to keep the United States of America free for the Immigrant…

fleeing poverty…

fleeing injustice…

fleeing nations where some are killed for their religious beliefs…

fleeing anti-Semitism…

fleeing anti-Roman Catholic sentiments…

fleeing anti-Islamic sentiments…

Buddhists fleeing fascists bent on wiping out their culture…

Armenians on the wrong side of a war picking up the pieces of their culture from the ashes of genocide.

Nazi assclowns ruin Punk Rock…and literature…burning books or writing the roadmap to Oklahoma City…Nazi assclowns ruin the Freedom of Speech.

If Space/Time Travel were only so easy as a gravity generator that looks like a Bone Density scanner from a Will Smith movie…we could help the Kurdish fighters trying to live without Isis and within Syria.

November Fifth, 2009 Washington D.C. became a city and moment where the Ghost Project would deposit or feed upon the living population who could not or would not be evacuated because of the emanant destruction caused by the McGill device there are plenty of living humans to feed upon. Like using death row prisoners for medical experiments…but how ethical is revenge. Revenge isn’t justice but when the justice system fails to heed the cry of a Chicken Little…the Cock must continue to crow…maybe some people only take care of their own and there isn’t a Good Samaritan around because the bandits are playing dead. With fake blood and a concealed weapon, the kindness of a stranger is used as the bandits’ bait.

The sky falls most days and sometimes the justice system seems to fail to acknowledge the weather…Pompeii or Mount St Helens.

Kindness is much more real than Gravity Generators, Patlanis traversing Space/Time, and the Zed retrovirus…

If and only if Kindness is contagious…

Spread Kindness?

But the greatest trick Satan ever played was to convince the world He doesn’t exist…

Nazi assclowns have the same trick…

Assclowns are real.

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