Been Here Before

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Back Where I started

I was killed in that swamp by those alligators.

As my soul was separating from my body, I instantly remembered everything that I've ever done in this lifetime.

Not only that, I remembered all of my lifetimes. Every single one of them. I've had thousands of them. Rich, poor, tall, short, fat, skinny, male and female. Any race that you could think of I've been. I've pretty much lived almost everything from being a animal to dying as a flower because it was too cold in the winter time, or just had no water.

I was saying to myself, "oh yeah, I did do all of that." Still traumatized from the life and death that I have just left from. I've never died like this so it was quite traumatizing.

I remembered getting my head chopped off back in the ancient days, but to me that wasn't as bad as being torn apart by alligators.

I wasn't thinking about being so down about being separated from my family any more because I realized that it was just time for me to go. I've done everything that I needed to do in that lifetime. Even though it was short, that was the whole plan before I had even gotten to earth.

My guardian angel suddenly came with open arms giving me a hug. It was so nurturing, and I felt a comfort that I haven't felt since I've last been here.

"Welcome back." The angel sweetly said to me.

She seen that I was still a little rattled and drained from the short life that I had just came from just from her hugging me.

She looked at me, and she looked just as bright as a light bulb, smiling, saying, "job well done. I will lead you home now."

As she lead me on my way, I was running into souls that I haven't seen in years. I'm talking about people/souls that I haven't seen in about three or four lifetimes.

They were all welcoming me back as I was getting closer to the bright light.

There was this one soul in particular that I've noticed that we've never finished what we started in a past life. It was a male and I was a female in that lifetime. We were together. Been together for about a year. We were engaged. He was drafted into World War One and was killed. I remembered when I got the news, I was so heartbroken about it. I was saving myself for him for when he was suppose to come back. It was hard for me to handle and I remembered that I never loved anybody in that lifetime more than I loved him. I never even got married or had any kids.

I remembered it was another soul that I noticed that I was really close to on my way to the light. It was my mother from my last lifetime.

She switched up rolls and ended up playing my grandfather from the life that I had just left from. He died when I was just six years old but I still remembered him as I did get older.

As my grandfather, he was so fun be around. I had still remembered all the weekends that me, Brighchell and Addett spent at his house. He died from cancer.

When he was my mother in my last lifetime, we were also very close. I was also a female.

She died from heart complications. I was already in my twenties.

I died the same way once I hit sixty four.

When me and my guardian angel went into the light, God was in my presents.

The best way that I could explain him was just pure energy and love. The knowledge that I had of him and always had in my purest form was that we've always been connected at all times. I came from him and nowhere else.

Really, from experiencing God from time to time, he doesn't have a gender. God is something that's unexplainable in human words.

Being that we all came from God, really just a broken off peice of him, we are all Gods too, but just not as big and powerful as him.

Being in a human body, you have no idea how powerful you are. The human body isn't nearly as advanced as the soul is. All it knows is just the few decades that it lives on earth, but the thing about life is that it is an experience, and that's what the soul needs to be more advanced. Every life that the soul lives rather if it's on earth or on another planet, its a different experience and the soul is learning more and more.

Like I said earlier, once I died, all of this instantly came back to me.

When I was up with God, God surrounded me with masters, angels and other souls that I have known for millions of years.

"Job well done." God spoke to me. "You remained humbled in your life, and you showed the people around you that it is possible to live as a kind and caring person even with negativity all around you."

Everybody around me congratulated me because I caused no karma in that lifetime. I payed alot of it back in that lifetime from other lifetimes.

"I will leave you to your masters because you have alot of healing to work on from your death." God continued to speak to me. "As you know, you can't go back to earth until your done with your healing process here."

I wasn't physically hurt, but as I said before, a death like that is very traumatic, and any death like that needs therapy and healing before going back to earth.

I was told to take all the time that I needed.

Before I came to earth, I already knew how I was going to die. It was pretty much planned out. I just didn't remember any of this as a human. Your not suppose to.

As I was connecting with one of the masters, they were showing me what was going on down on earth.

My sister was the first one to notice that I wasn't home as it was starting to get late. She knew that wasn't like me to be out at nighttime. Plus I was only twelve. I wasn't suppose to be out past dark. She was calling my phone but of course no response. It was going straight to voicemail.

I seen her going to my mother telling her that I wasn't home yet. She didn't really seem all that concerned.

Brighchell went to Addett's room to ask him if he heard anything from me.

He told her that he hadn't seen me since morning time before school.

Brighchell was starting to get nervous and decided to go to John's house since she didn't have his phone number.

His mother came to the door. Brighchell was asking her if shes seen me.

John's mother told her earlier, but she didn't know where I was at in the present time.

She called John from his room and he came to the door.

"When was the last time you heard from Benoit because he never came home." His mother informed him in front of my sister.

"The last time I seen him, he was over here. We were playing the playstation. He said he was going home after he left here." John told them.

Brighchell's anxiety then started to level up.

"Where do you think he's at than?" John's mother asked her.

"I don't know. This isn't like him. His phone is going straight to voicemail." Brighchell replied back to John's mother kind of flapping her arms.

She dug in her pockets to grab her phone so she could call me again, but of course again it was going straight to voicemail.

"Hold on Brighchell. I'm going to put some shoes on. Were going to look for him." John's mother worriedly said to Brighchell.

As I watched all of this, I couldn't help but to feel a little sorry for them knowing that they weren't going to find me.

As time went on, and the police got more involved in, they found out what happened to me.

It took them about a week and the police didn't even find me, some kids did. A group of kids were walking down that street that next week and smelled a foul oder that was coming from the other side of the gate. It was one of my decapitated arms that wasn't fully ate.

The kids were grossed out by it, pointing and making eww noises.

One of them went home and told a parent about it, and the parent came out to look at it.

The parent got on their phone and called the police.

The police came out and took my arm to the lab, and that's how they found out that it was me.

They called my mom to tell her what most likely happened in their own assumptions and that was getting attacked by alligators.

My mom fell to the floor crying and beating the floor, breaking her phone. She made such a commotion out in the living room, Addett came out of his room to see what was going on.

She told him, then he started crying.

Before I got killed, me and Addett was ok as brothers. I would have liked it to been better but ok was fine with me.

As far as my mother went, yeah she treated me pretty bad, but this was something that she would never had wanted to happen. Now she was feeling really bad. Honestly, she wasn't just feeling bad, there were a whole bunch of feelings that were coming crashing down on her. The sickness that she was already dealing with was about to get alot more worse.

When my sister and my father found out, they were lost for words.

My dad did alot of blaming himself because he felt like he should've been around more, so he quit his job at being a truck driver.

My sister took it really hard. She missed about a month of school. She didn't talk to her friends all that month. My mom and dad didn't push her either.

This was a situation where you had to let a person grieve at their own pace. You couldn't rush anybody on this to do anything.

Of course there were some arguments and disagreements going on in the house, especially between my mother and my sister. Brighchell snapped on my mother one of the times that she tried to comfort Brighchell. It was the anger that was built up over the years from the way my mother treated all of us, and we all had to hide it from my father because she threatened to kill us.

She denied it as he stood there with a very confused look on his face. He had no idea.

Brighchell got on my mother about how she use to treat me, and she didn't want any sympathy from her because she was such a bad mother. She didn't want to see any tears from my mother because she treated me so awful.

My mother just kept playing the roll like she didn't know what she was talking about, mainly because my father was sitting there watching and listening the whole time. My mother cried some more. I knew that she really was hurting because that guilt was eating her alive.

The house was a mess, but the truth was finally starting to come out. There was already changes but there was about to be some more.

The next day, my best friend John had walked over there to see how they all were doing. He was pretty torn up about it as you could imagine.

For some cool off time apart, my dad decided to send Brighchell to my aunts house to spend a couple of days, along with Addett.

John came and knocked on the door. My mother answered it letting him in.

As they all talked, mainly about me, my mother asked him if he wanted something to eat or to drink. He took the offer for the drink.

As my mother went to the kitchen, and letting John and my father communicate a little more, she grabbed a knife from the drawer.

She came back in the living room to walk up behind John. She quickly slide her hand up under his chin to lift his head up so she could place the knife up to his throat.
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