It's difficult being what I am, an animal, when I was taken I was told that I would be made into something new. I didn't realize that I would be turned into a monster. That I would loose my humanity along the way, it's coming back... in pieces.
After Wolf met that outsider all of our lives changed, the club he was in they took us in and gave us refuge after we killed Uncle. They gave us a home, they welcomed and accepted us. Even though we were bred killers, monsters with the cruelest capacities for torture and murder. Cold blooded to the core and yet they welcomed us in, sent us in to do the jobs that would kill even their best men.
At first I fought it, all I'd known was Uncle and the compound but Wolf and Bear were sure I'd come around and so I gave it a chance. Allowing what small humanity I had left within myself after Ellie died a chance to blossom again.
Admittedly the club wasn't the only reason I wanted to give the outside world a chance, another reason was the outsider's sister Kassi. She is beautiful and kind and gentle, when we first arrived she looked after us and made feel us at home.
I felt strangely protective of her and yet I've never been with a woman, how would I know what to do? So I keep her at a small distance just close enough to be considered a friend but not close enough to see my affection for her. While she dates others I sit on the sidelines and watch with an inherent fury, yet I worry to let her close for fear I may hurt her. I am dark and unruly, the fury deep in my soul does nothing but hurt others around me. Bear and Wolf they can take it because they are built like me, I do not fear my enemies finding them for I know they will always win but Kassi.. she is so soft and delicate almost like a flower.
No, I cannot let her close. We must remain only friends, if she were to get too close and then get hurt because of her association with me I would never forgive myself.
And yet, while she is on a date with some pompous asshole from the upper class side I couldn't help but agree to be her security. Whether she wanted it or not Reaper would have someone tail her at all times to make sure she was never taken by a rival club again. A detail that is far beneath me and my skill set, but for her... anything.
And so, I sat on my bike outside the restaurant Riffs and watched as she laughed emptily at his fourteenth lame joke about himself, subtly downing her wine the rim of the glass would hide her eyes rolling. I smirked at the cleverness of the movement, always so graceful.
You sound like a stalker
The prospect beside started sighing and shifting on his bike "Bored?" I grunted at him. He jumped as my harsh voice cut through the air, I smirked again, my reputation clearly precedes me. Bear and I would break in the new prospects making sure they could take a solid beating and hold their own in a fight.
"Need to take a piss" He rumbled folding his arms over his chest sighing heavily. "So go take a piss then" I barked at him "Better then listening to you sitting here sighing like a middle aged woman"
He muttered something incoherent and hopped off his bike, wandering across the road into the ditches. I rolled my eyes and went back to watching my darling Kassi through the window.
Someday I will have you
"How long is this slut gonna sit here for? Like fuck" The prospect had returned to his bike and clearly brought a fresh wave of attitude with him. I shot him a warning look but chose to ignore his words, don't kill the prospect.
Do not kill the prospect
"Shit it's been hours already. Why doesn't she just hurry up and open her legs so we can go back to the clubhouse already. Fuck"
I took in a deep breath in attempting to calm the rage beginning to bubble in the pit of my stomach.
Do not kill this prospect
Do not kill this prospect
"If I'd known she was up for the taking shit I would've put my name down. Fuck me she's a meal and a half. Legs around my neck as I-"
He didn't get to finish his sentence before I was up from my bike, without warning I punched him square in the chest with all my might sending him flying across the car park. I heard the snap and the crunch as he landed.
Please don't be dead
I sighed heavily, looking back inside briefly to see that Kassi was still sitting at the table with Mr. Pompous I walked over to where the prospect was laying. Standing over him I listened intently for a heart beat.
Dragging him back over to our bikes I lay him at a slump at the base of his, pulling my phone out of my pocket I called Bear. Thankfully he answered on the third ring.
"Hey man what's up? Need back up?"
"Uh something like that, Can you tell Reaper I need a body collection and another on security with me?" I looked down at the prospect, such a pity. Oh well he'll know next time.
Oh Yeah he won't
"Body collection? Who? Beast... You didn't? The prospect?"
I grumbled slightly at the harshness in Bear's tone "He was saying some not nice things about Kassi and I may have punched him a little too hard" I shrugged my shoulders, watching my delightful Kassi in the window.
"May have? Beast come on man that's the third prospect this month! When are you gonna admit you have feelings for this girl?"
"I'm a monster I feel nothing. Now shut the fuck up and send someone to come collect his damn body before he's fish food" I hung up abruptly shoving my phone back into my pocket still grumbling over what he had said.
Admit I have feelings
As if a monster like me could have any form of happiness for even a second.
No. I was better off alone and angry. That's what I was created for that's how Uncle wanted me.
After all that's why he killed Ellie.
So that I would always be alone, his ruthless killing machine.