Write a Review

Buy One, Get One

All Rights Reserved ©


A mafia hit man hiding in Alaska is offered an unusual assignment which has recurring repercussions.

Thriller / Mystery
Age Rating:

Chapter 1

The chalk board outside the Coochi Goo Gentleman’s Club in Shinbone Alaska read, “Pitchers of Beer – Buy One, Get One.” As it was designed to, it caused the bouncer, plenty of trouble. Unfortunately, I was the bouncer.

“What’s the problem?”

“The bartender’s trying to charge me for a second pitcher of beer and it says, ‘buy one get one’.”

“Well, you bought one and you got one, didn’t you?”

The customer gave me a dopey look. “Yeah?”

“What you’re looking for is ‘buy one get two.’ This is a bar, not a soup kitchen. If you don’t like it, get the eff out.”

As the Coochi Goo was the only strip club in Shinbone, inevitably they stayed.

After one of these encounters T.J. Beczak approached me surreptitiously and asked, “Didn’t you tell me once you were a hit man?”

I was tired of Beczak. He was the first person I’d met on the boat coming to Alaska. Though he initially impressed me with his dough, now Beczak bored the crap out of me.

“What of it?” I said. It was only a matter of minutes before another of these nimrods thought the sign entitled them to a free pitcher. I was tired of that routine, too.

Beczak sighed. When I met him he was this lanky, arrogant nitwit from Jersey, dressed from the L.L. Bean catalog. He thought he was a millionaire because his parents had money. Nine months in Alaska had played havoc with his ego. He grew a black beard that made him look like a minor character in a Popeye cartoon, and bought a fishing boat. Then he “fell in love” with a stripper named Nichole Houlihan. To his misfortune, so did every other dude in Shinbone. Nichole, for her part, was no more real than Betty Boop.

“I was just wondering what you charge?” He sounded like a patient asking a doctor what his co-pay would be.

I put a hand on his shoulder and spoke confidentially to him. “T.J.,” I said, “I don’t do women.”

Beczak’s brown eyes widened. They always looked kind of Manson-like. “Oh, no,” he said. “It’s a guy.”

“If it’s a normal guy, twenty grand,” I told him. “If it’s someone famous or difficult… you know. It’s by the job.”

“What about me?” He asked sadly.

“What about you?” I said. I guessed he was drunk.

“Am I a normal guy?”

“You mean you want to pay me to whack you?” I said starting to laugh. “You know, T.J., get the eff out of here. You’ve had enough.”

“I can get you twenty grand in cash first thing in the morning,” he said resolutely.

When I got into this racket I never thought I’d need to be a shrink. “Look, T.J.” I said. “We went over this before you proposed to Nichole. You’ve got to listen to me. I grew up around these kinds of broads.”

T.J. set his mouth in a straight line and concentrated on what I was saying.

“You know I had Nichole the first night we came in here. She went for the muscle and the meat and the gold jewelry. But Nichole has a plan. She isn’t going to get what she needs from me. We parted friends. You and Eddie and Tony never got that.”

“I know,” Beczak said, dejected.

“You say you do, but you don’t” I told him. “You’re ready to kill yourself over a stripper? Look, some of these chicks are going to be doing this until they’re thirty and then they’ll go to a town further north and continue doing it at a dingier joint. Nichole saves her pennies and she hocks the rings you morons buy her and in two years she’s going to be down at Tulane studying medicine, tuition paid in full. Nicole is smarter than you. That’s why you want to own her.”

The Manson eyes flared at me. “She is not smarter than me,” he said angrily.

I took my friendly hand away and held his gaze. I could break him like a toothpick and he knew it.

“I’ll give you twenty grand in cash tomorrow,” he said and stalked into the cold Alaska night in his blue, down vest.

Continue Reading Next Chapter
Further Recommendations

Katharina Reiber: Sehr gut geschrieben ich war gefesselt von der ersten bis zur letzen Minute.

Baggie Keay: A desperately sad but funny short story that needs a lot of spelling and grammar tidying up. However it really is a delightful read and although a lot is packed into a short, short book it doesn't actually feel at all rushed.

María Del Carmen: Buena redacción, signos bien colocados que hacen fácil la lectura y comprensión

ina: Die Bücher sind einfach nur klasse

Bambi: Mir gefällt nur eines nicht- DAS ES NICHT WEITERGEHT! Bin total gespannt!

Annelin Viste: Sweet love story 🥰

Sarah Grace: The story is amazing and I can’t wait to read more, the spelling could use a little work but It’s not that big of an issue. I’ve really enjoyed each of the characters and how the plot has developed and I’m excited for more to come out.

Lorraine Feehan: Loved story can’t wait to read more

marremom: great little story. had kind of "the mist" feel to it, but you made it your own. pain is something that can wreak havoc in so many ways. i love the ending where he realizes that this is his demon. it killed the others to magnify his own pain and grief. hes been living in his own hell since his fa...

More Recommendations

Gurleen Benipal: Seriously a great story!!! There are no grammar mistakes and it's easy to read! The characters are definitely well thought out but I just wish you made Sofia even more proud and as freaky as he is. A female who challenged the way he thinks and changes him (either making him go mad and makes him e...

scarbrough71: 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Renata: Me encantó, es muy interesante, ojalá y tenga continuidad

Deleted User: This story is beautifully written and I can’t wait for the updatekeep up the good work ❤️😊

Rachael: Okay so I've read about 150 stories here on this app, and many more on others. But I honestly had trouble putting this one down. It has a nice mystery twist to the romance and the whole story was unique. The characters were easy to understand and not too many. The whole story I was able to fly th...

suzell: I'm enjoying this story. Has many curve balls that keeps you connected.

About Us

Inkitt is the world’s first reader-powered publisher, providing a platform to discover hidden talents and turn them into globally successful authors. Write captivating stories, read enchanting novels, and we’ll publish the books our readers love most on our sister app, GALATEA and other formats.