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The Word 'Goodbye' Can Hurt So Much

Cordelia Bane.

Two hours have passed of being inside this courtroom as everybody disputes their opinions and arguments.

All I can do is listen and feel broken while Guy sits there as they point out all of his crimes and punishments.

At times we sneak glances hoping we could just talk to each other.

They wanted this court hearing to be as quick as possible, I've heard some people are afraid of Guy knowing he's a cold-blooded murderer,

They all wanted him locked away forever or dead.

Even the past victim's families happen to be apart of this courtroom, I even met them as they showed their sympathy towards me.

All I could see was the sadness in their eyes knowing they are finally getting justice for their daughter and I can't help but feel worse.

He killed those pure souls and I'm here still wanting Guy in my arms once again.

It's bizarre

"Honey, It's time" My dad whispered at both of us.

I looked up and didn't notice I wasn't paying attention most of the time because of all of my thoughts that were swimming.

I listened in...

"Has the jury come to a verdict?" The judge asked

Oh no!

I felt afraid and my heart is pounding. I didn't want to listen but I couldn't move!

My chest is getting tight.

One man stood, wearing a suit "We have your honor... The countless murders of degree, we find the defendant, Guilty which will be the death penalty" He announced that made everyone in the courtroom sighed in relief and happiness...

Me on the other hand,

The room started to spin, my world stopped in shock but then my stomach began to swirl leading me to stand.

I rushed out of the courtroom needing to find the restroom. It was down the hall and I quickly opened the door and found a stall,

It all happened so quick, I threw up all of the contents I had inside my stomach and I felt horrible.

I began to sob and quivered knowing Guy will be gone forever and not be able to talk or see him again.

Leaving the stall, I turned on the faucet and rinsed my mouth out twice.

Suddenly I've heard a loud commotion outside, It was probably the crowd hearing about the news and I didn't want to see.

I leaned against the sinks, feeling feeble and hurt.

I heard the door open but whoever it was is probably looking at me with pity.

That's all I've been getting lately.

I flinched when I felt fingertips touch my shoulder,

A gasp escapes my mouth quickly turning around...

But when I saw who it was, My heart stopped

"Guy!!" I exclaimed in shock

He dropped the gun on the sink and closed the gap between us.

Out of instinct, I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him quickly.

Guy didn't waste any time to react as our lips dances together, I felt stunningly better to be in his embrace but I know this wasn't going to last but I'm gonna make the most of it.

When harsh banging on the doorway began to start, I went to look but Guy used his fingers to keep me in place.

"No, no sweetheart, let's just spend the time we only have together" Guy mumbled against my lips, the sadness within his eyes broke my heart knowing our time is short.

I whimpered "I-I miss you so much, Guy" My voice whispered, bound to break

Guy kept kissing me over and over again.

"Our time together is limited sweetheart, I just want you to know that I always loved you, and don't forget that, you hear me?" Guy caressed my cheek and placed something inside my hand and I wiped away my tears.

"I love you more Guy... So, so much" Cupping his face, not wanting to let him go

The banging on the door is becoming harder and with one last kiss on Guy's lips knowing it will be the last.

"Goodbye, Guy... I love you" I cried and backed away than the door finally broke down from Guy's barricade that he set up quickly before approaching me.

Police began swarming in and slammed Guy to the ground,

I sobbed more backing away to the wall. Seconds later, My parents came rushing in and took me into their arms.

I hid my face into my dad's shoulder as I couldn't see Guy being take away forever.

However, the closure I really needed has been finally done and hopefully, I can start moving on from this whole mess and continue from where it left off before this all began in the first place.

In peace.

Five Years Later

It's calm, quiet, and cordial, My short hair blows with the wind as my feet walk within the small forest that is placed in my back yard.

I inhale the fresh fall breeze while holding a small box in my hands and continuing to walk further where he is placed.

The years past by and I managed to heal, grow and forget about my past but there is one thing for certain that I can never let go,

.... Is Guy,

He's apart of me now and I have a part of him that walks the earth along with me until I die of old age but at times his face can never disappear from my mind,

I reached the resting place that I made for him long ago, My parents don't know nor anybody.

I just want this for myself and our memories together.

Sitting down on my knees, opening the small box, It held mementos of us, his watch, cap and the necklace he gave me that day in the bathroom, I couldn't wear it anymore, I just can't.

It's about that time.

Placing the necklace on the small tombstone and the old Nirvana hoodie he bought me on our first date as I chuckled folding it neatly.

"You may be gone Guy but every day I still see you in our son's face, he won't stop asking about his daddy and I don't have it in me to tell him, not yet... It already hurts so much now that you're gone and I miss you very much but just remember you are the only man who will own my heart and I don't care how insane that sounds... I will always love you, Guy, however, it's for the best of what happened to you and you know it. I just hope you finally made peace as I did... Sleep well Guy" I ran my hand over the stone one last time and placed down a Polaroid of us hugging.

I held on for too long.

Placing the photo underneath the hoodie and I stood, dusting off my knees.

I start heading back knowing my mother and Clay will wonder where I went off too. The walk back is short and sweet,

I entered the house and immediately heard Clay running down the hallway and found me enter from the back door.

"Mom!" He chirped

I smiled, quickly picking him up and placing Clay on my hip.

I found out a week later after the bathroom incident that I was pregnant with Guy's child,


"Hey babe, Did grandma freshen you up for supper?" I asked pecking his cheek and headed for the kitchen.

"Yes," He played with the collar of my shirt. Spotting my mother preparing supper for us, I put Clay on the table.

After Guy's death, I thought I'd never get through it but knowing Clay at my side and filling the hole in my heart,

I'm better and happier.

"Where did you go?" My mother asked.

I looked at her with a warm smile.

".... Just reminiscing that's all" I replied in a soft tone and started helping my mom with supper...

And glad that everything and everybody is finally at peace.

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