“It’s going to be a long recovery until you face it, but no one ever agrees in facing their fears because fear is their downfall, falling into a darkness and never coming out of it, the same way they have entered it.” My Therapist says as he chuckles. “It’s funny how everyone relies on their eyes instead of other abilities that we have in order to break free from our traumatizing past.”
Looking down, thinking what he said as he checks off his list that he has in his hands. “It’s no easy like you say it is. I’m not strong enough to face my darkness.”
“Decisions are always hanging in front of us which you do with that information is how you are going to live.”
Playing with my hands as I sigh in discomfort. “If I were you, I won’t help me either.” I stand up and walked towards the door and grab onto the doorknob.
He says. “What happened to Jessica was not your fault, tell me, if you knew from the beginning, you and she would not be there. She won’t be killed.”
I put my head down knowing, what he said struck my heart, “I would have done everything in my power to protect her.”
“You see what I mean.” I had enough of him as I opened the door and walked out the office.
I was on a deck on a ship when I noticed a man in a black suit, putting a gray suitcase up against the wall just across from where I was standing. He started to look nervous as he shakes his hands as he walks away from the suitcase. Out nowhere, I felt compelled to walk over to the suitcase since he left it. I picked up the suitcase as I turn to him saying. “Sir, you have forgotten your suitcase!” The man took a left turn, no longer in my view. I wanted to chase after him when I heard a ticking coming from inside of the case. I put it down and open it. It was a bomb and it was ticking 54 seconds until detonation.
I woke up from my bed. “It was one of those dreams of horror. I couldn’t tell if I was losing my mind.” I place my hands on my face. I couldn’t help myself, but to think when I was in Iraq, when I join the Navy first and then join the fight since I heard my best friend, Jessica wanted to join.
A massive feeling of terror took over me, I was left to think about Jessica about that day when they took her life in front of my eyes. “Jessica,” she lost her life because of a sniper. We were behind a brick wall when she peeks out to see if it was clear to go. The next thing I know, her forehead was hit, then a grenade was thrown at us. I didn’t have time to react to her death. The only thing that came to my mind was to drag her lifeless body. The blast of the grenade threw us far.
A couple of rebels took notice and ran towards us. Everything was fuzzy and for once I thought I was dead too, joining along with Jessica. Luckily, I played dead as my friend’s blood made a puddle. The rebels took our guns and left with few items we had in our pockets. When I woke up from the blast. I cried for my best friend as I shook Jessica, I knew she wasn’t moving nor coming back to life.
We have been best friends since little, shared everything. I even look up to her as a little sister. “I still blame myself for her death. It should have been me.”
“Lucky! Wake up!” I turn around and open my eyes just a little to see my favorite brother. August is sixteen years old turning seventeen next week. He looks just like our late father, Rico. His short black hair, with his dark brown eyes. His pale skin and he almost 5’9.
I stand up and hug him. “My favorite brother, August.” I am a little shorter than him, I am at least 5’5. He hugs me back. “Well, let’s get packing. Mom said she wanted us ready before seven.”
I let go, to grab the clock that was on the desk next to my bed just behind me. “It’s only five o’clock. Fine, I’ll go and get ready.” I put back the alarm clock as he said. “Alright, mom would make breakfast in a few.” He turns around to leave.
“Thanks.” I said. He only put his hand up as he left my bedroom. I got ready for our cruise. I have everything ready since yesterday. The only thing is to do is my short black hair in curls and fix myself. I fixed my short hair and put on my black pants and a blue blouse. I looked in my closet to notice my military uniform that was left untouched as I picked it up from the hanger. “I thought I gave this back...” I looked to my right to notice my blue suitcase, place back the uniform as I grab the suitcase, and opened it. “I have forgotten that I had my guns in this suitcase.” I made sure they were unloaded and put them in my other suitcase. I place my uniform and boots in a book bag. I brought my papers that I could carry the guns.
“I have an uneasy feeling about this trip. I don’t know why. The news was talking about a rabies outbreak lately. A girl gotta be prepared.” Soon, I went downstairs to eat breakfast with my family.
We packed everything in my best friend’s car before seven am. My best friend, Izumi is taking us. Izumi is a teacher for kindergarten, she has long black hair and she is shorter than all of us. She also has brown eyes just like mine. Izumi wears green lovely long sleeve blouse along with long pants. The ship leaves at 10 am so we have plenty of time on the road. It was only my mother; brother and I are going to the ship. My mom is shorter than me. She has short light hair and light brown eyes. She wears blue T-shirt and blue sweatpants.
As for my father passed away when August and I were little.
We were on the road. “So, Lucky, are you getting married anytime soon?” My beautiful best friend said.
I smiled and looked out the window. “You know, I’m too young for that.”
“What? You’re like 25 years old, soon 26. That is late my friend. You need to get married before you hit your 30s.” Izumi was laughing about it.
“I know, I always tell her to marry her best friend, Bill.”
“Mom, I don’t like him. We are only friends.” I said with a smile. My thoughts only land on Dark.
“Don’t lie, look at the smile.” Izumi said.
“Whatever, your choice to believe it or not,” as I close my eyes, put my head on the window. I heard my mom in the back calling her mom. “Mommy, tell grandma, I miss her.”
I know mommy is smiling, “Mami, Suerte, temanda bendición y much besos.” (I send you a lot of blessing and lots of kisses) “Lucky, mommy said the same.”
I smiled. In fact, this is the first time, we are going on a cruise back home to our homeland, Puerto Rico. We go every year there during the summer, but since I left, I haven’t gone to Puerto Rico in a long time since I joined the military. My family has been very supporting. I’m very grateful to still have a family.
I open my eyes and notice my friend making an exit. “Almost there.”
“Hey, Izumi. When we come back, let’s go to Disney. Let’s invite our friends. Also, August is coming with us.”
“Sure, sounds great. After all, is it summer all year around in Florida?” She smiled as she laughed a little.
I laughed along with her. “August, you want to join us. I mean you could bring your own friends and we could get together.” Izumi said.
“Nah, I don’t want to go this year. Maybe next time.” He said.
I could not let that go. “Come on, please, pretty please. It’s on me. My treat.” I begged him. “If you go, I will buy anything you want.”
“On you? Sure, why not. I’ll pick the expensive stuff.” August grin evilly.
I pout. “Not too expensive.”
“Hey, are you not going to take me?” Mom said upset.
“Yes, we are going to take you. It will be a family group, next time...” I said as I looked out the window.
“Mary, I am sure they will… Oh gosh.” Izumi slows down. “You see this?” She said as she went to the side. She slows down and saw someone run over. The lady in the car had a gun and shot him more than once in the head.
“Izumi! Get out of here!” I yelled.
Izumi step on it. “Oh, my gosh, what was wrong with her? Did we just witness a murder?” She said in a shaken-up voice.
“I think the police will stop her, that was insane.” My brother said.
I started to have memories about the war. My breathing started to become heavy, trying to relax and go to a happy place in my mind, closing my eyes. “It was. Well, we are halfway there. Hopefully, the officers will get her.” Izumi said.
“Honey, are you okay?” Mom asked as she shook my shoulder.
I snap out of it and said. “Yeah, a little.”
Izumi rubs my arm. “It’s okay, Jessica is in a better place.” I looked away.
We finally made it and got our suitcase. I put my book bag on as I hug Izumi and tell her to be careful driving back home. She has a gun in the drawer of the car. I told her to use it if anything happens. We were heading up and waved goodbye to Izumi. They didn’t check our suitcase. “How strange?” I said under my breath.
“What’s strange?” August said as he looks at me.
“Never mind. Let’s wave goodbye to Izumi.” We were very happy that they announce we were leaving. We waved goodbye to Izumi.
“Bye! Have a safe trip! Bring me a gift when you are over there!” Izumi yelled.
“We will!” I waved back and send kisses. Soon we were far away from Izumi. She looks like a dot. I waved for the last time. “I am so happy.” We were headed over to the room, shared one room since it was too expensive for the other rooms. It was a two bed and one bathroom. My mom and I will be sharing a bed while my brother have the bed all to himself.
I place our book bag and suitcase on top of the bed. “I don’t want to unpack; I’ll do that later.” I said to my mother.
“Sure honey. You have the time in the world.” She said with a smile.
I put my book bag in the closet along with my suitcase. My brother pulled my arm. “Sis, let’s go to the dining room. I’m hungry.”
“No, I didn’t eat a big meal. Mami, let’s go.” We headed out to eat. We were lost kind of but found the dining room. It was fancy and it was huge. I enjoy it very much. “Very classy.” I said.
“Hopefully it isn’t a titanic, you know.” I heard a girl say as she walked by me.
My brother eats peacefully. We overheard people conversation. “No Margret, please, we just got here.” A man said to his baby. The baby started to cry. The mother took her and rocked her.
I smiled at the family. “Aww, you want a family?” Mama said with a smile.
I blushed. “No,” as I looked to my left. I stand up and notice him. “It couldn’t be, I’ll be back.” I rush over to him and tap his shoulder. He turns around where I ambushed him with a hug. “Ice.”
Ice is my friend from the Navy. We have known each other for three years. I had a crush on him for a very long while, I wanted to tell him that I like him before I join the fight, but I discover he had his first girlfriend and soon started to like Dark.
We let go of the hug. “Lucky?” Ice is a tall man; he is skinny and buff. He has green eyes and has short brown hair. He wears an orange T-shirt with a blue short pants.
I let go and tap his head. “Same.”
“Lucky, it’s nice to see you around. I see you’re doing better.”
I nod. “So, you here with your girlfriend?” I looked around.
“Aw, no. We have broken up that same month. She cheated on me with my best friend. Yeah, I know, it sucks.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. You’re a handsome man, you’ll get a better girl.” He is a handsome man.
He smiled. “I’m here with my family, you know. You here by yourself?”
“Aw, no. I’m with my family as well. You want to meet them, and I’ll meet your family?”
“Moving so fast, we just meet after three years later.”
I grab his arm and pulled him to meet my family. “Remember, we are not dating.”
“Of course, but still...” We were inches away from my family when someone yelled our names.
“Lucky! Ice!” We looked behind us and saw him. “Jeremy.” Ice says. Jeremy is a very handsome man just like Ice. Another tall man, he has brown eyes and short black hair. He wears a purple shirt and jeans. He hugs me and bro hug Ice. “So good to see you both again. Ah, it remains me of the good old times.”
I smiled. “It’s nice to see you as well.”
“How are things in your end?” Jeremy says as he crosses his arms.
“Good. I am on break and decided to take a long vacation.” Ice says with a smile.
“Yeah, me too. Do you want to meet my family?” I asked to change the subject. They do not know what happened to me after I left the navy.
I walked up to my mom and they came along, “This is my family. This is my mother, Mary. This is my brother August.”
“Hello, nice to meet you.” They said at the same time.
I giggled. “Just like brothers.”
Jeremy puts his arm around Ice’s shoulders. “Yeah, brothers for life.”
Ice smiled and put his arm around his shoulder. “Jup, brothers.”
“Who are they? Sis?” My brother asked as he eats his blueberry pancake.
“Oh, sorry. This is Jeremy and Ice,” as I point at them.
“You know it’s rude to point.” Ice said annoyed.
“Whatever, isn’t like I’m a stranger to you both.” I pout and cross my arms.