In the silence of the night, I lay still and wide awake on my bed. The steady sound of the clock that’s ticking breaks the silence, only to make the atmosphere of my room feels eerie. I switch the lamp on and look at the time. 12.27. I let out a sigh and lay back on my bed, staring at the ceiling above me with a frown on my face.
It’s been a month since the first time I keep waking up in the middle of the night without knowing the reason why. Sometimes, I can’t even fall back to sleep and keep staying wide awake until it’s time for school. I wish tonight is not the day that it happens.
I swing my legs to the side of the bed, deciding to drink some hot chocolate because sometimes the beverage does help me to go back to sleep. I walk out of my room and descend the creaky wooden stairs of my house as I hope the loud noise won’t be waking anyone else. I walk into the kitchen and go straight to make some hot chocolate for myself.
I stir the hot chocolate for a bit when creaky noises from the stairs shock me and make me jump a little in my place. I place my hand over my chest and rub it soothingly, hoping it will calm down soon.
I turn off the stove and go to take a look at the stairs, the direction of where the sounds coming. My eyes catch the sight of dad walking down the stairs with a frown that’s marring his face. He runs his hand through his dark blonde hair and sighs quietly. A smile appears on his face the moment he notices me there, standing in front of him with a frown. I quickly return his smile and stares into his eyes that are looking heavy.
“Can’t sleep again?” He asks, and I nod a little at him. “Yeah.”
I step back into the kitchen and walk towards the stove where a pot of hot chocolate is waiting for me to serve it. I grab it and pour the hot beverage into a mug.
“Do you want some hot chocolate? I can make another glass for you.” I turn to him, and he shakes his head slightly with a tired smile on his face.
“No, thanks, sweetheart. I’m just going to make a cup of coffee for myself.”
Coffee? That must’ve been because he hasn’t finished his work yet, I frown at the thought. He always brings his works from the office to home and has always been busy with them.
My parents are the hard-working type of people. They always work hard for my 13-year-old brother, Liam, and me. Too hard, can I say, and they also always make sure that we live our lives to the best. I’ve always wanted to have a job of my own, but my parents won’t let me have one until the time I start college. I can’t wait until the time comes so I can lessen their long hours of working. By that too, I can get my own money. I don’t have to rely on their money to buy what I want.
“You’re still working?” I ask with a frown. I hope he’s not tiring himself up for working until this late. He’s going to get sick if he keeps working like this, and I can’t let that happen because it will only make him think about work even more.
“Yes. I have to work on some paperwork. I’ll finish it in an hour or so.” He tiredly smiles as he turns to me and goes back to work on the coffee maker.
“Can’t it wait until tomorrow?” I ask, and he turns to me and smiles. He steps closer to me and ruffles my hair. I step away from him and groan, only to get a chuckle out of him.
“It’s for tomorrow, Robbie. It’s better to get it done sooner than later so I can get more rest.”
“Right.” I frown.
He’s not entirely true because whenever he finishes his work, there’s another work awaits for him. From that, you know that the cycle will repeat itself over and over again.
“You better go to sleep now. Tomorrow is your first day of senior year.” He smiles widely at me, and for a second, it seems like he’s not tired at all. It even looks like he’s just woken up from eight-hour-long of quality sleep.
First day of senior year. Right. The day that I’ve been waiting for a very long time. I’ve been waiting for so long that I wish I can skip it and go to college already. Ugh, why can’t I have a job already? If I have one, I can save up some money for my needs, and my parents would have less expenses. They can save the money for themselves or Luke, although it’s not that much money.
“Okay.” I nod at him and grab my mug full of the now warm beverage. He pulls me into a half embrace and kiss my head affectionately.
“Goodnight, dad.” I smile at him, and he returns it.
I walk into my room and push the door closed behind me with my foot. I sit on my bed and keep holding onto the warm mug, feeling the warmth of it radiates onto the palms of my hands. I lift the drink towards my lips and take a sip. As I take a few gulps, my mind starts to wander elsewhere.
I think back to the time when my mom told me I should go to the doctor and get my insomnia checked and also get some medicine for it. But, being the stubborn daughter, I refuse it because I hate going to the hospital. I can’t stand the strong smell of antiseptics around the place. Just thinking about how many people die in there also makes me shudder in fright.
I can’t help but wonder about how can mom, who’s working as a nurse, stays in that place for such a long time and has to interact with the patients most of the time she works. I don’t know how she can stand it when they take their last breaths and see it with her own eyes.
I push the scary thought to the back of my mind and put the mug down on the nightstand. I turn off the light and lay down on the bed, letting out a quiet sigh. I shut my eyes and hope that I will drift off to sleep soon.
I keep my eyes closed for minutes, but drowsiness doesn’t seem like it wants to come. I’m not sleepy, not even for a bit. I frown and groan as I attempt to get to sleep. I decide to turn to my side and relax my body. I can feel the changing of position does help me to get sleepy. I keep laying like that, and my mind starts to turn foggy.