Have you ever had a secret that you never knew you had , and the scariest part is that everyone knew it before you. When the secret comes out, it’s like there was a part of you that was hidden for so long, and then your brain finally connected the dots. Because that happened to me.
It started the summer before my Jr year of high school, that’s when my life changed… forever. It was noon when-
“Chase.CHASE! Where are you going and what are you looking for.”
“ To Tyler’s” I said frantically looking for my hoodie that I’ve worn pretty much every day since I got it.
“But isn’t he at football camp” my mom said while tracking me around my room.
“Yeah he was, but he came back last night, invited me over. Mom have you seen my hoodie the black one wi-“
“With the rose” she said annoyed, knowing I have a hundred good hoodies but, I only wear that one.“it’s in the dryer” I flash her a smile, the one that tends to get me in trouble. Then headed downstairs to the laundry room “ you two must have a lot to talk about, you haven’t spoken since he left.”I look around the dryer, in the bins and even the cabinets but nothing.
“ I guess, never really thought about it like that” I said while raiding the washer “I mean we’ve been friends forever it shouldn’t be that hard to have a conversation.”
“Well have fun and be nice to Tyler ” she said as she handed me that hoodie that just magically appeared in her hands, “and can you give him something for me.”
“Yeah sure” she grabbed my forehead and gave me a big kiss “ewww mom, come on” I wipe her lip gloss off. She crossed her arms and gave a unnerving smile. “Is there a problem, your creeping me out.” I say as a struggle to get the knot out of my hoody and succeeding.
“Nothing, just-” she nearly whispered. Then sighs heavily “ just don’t have too much fun that’s all” I roll my eyes “mom there won’t be any drinking or whatever it’s just gonna be me and h-“ She give me other kiss after I managed to get the hoodies over my head. I walk out the laundry room, annoyed wiping off her lipgloss off my cheek. She smiles. Then I go straight in to the kitchen and grab my keys from the fruit bowl. She grabbed the hood of my hoodie “ hey, you know I will love you and support you no matter what right.”
“You know that right.”
“Yeah mom, but why ar-“
“I love you Chase.”
“ I love you too, mom “ as I was getting into the car, I was trying to understand what she meant by that. I know she has been my number one supporter in football, but I have a feeling that’s not what she was talking about. I finally got to his house which didn’t take very long, since we do live on the same block.
I enter his home without knocking, which is kind of rude but it’s what I’m use to. It wasn’t till I was already in when I realized how two months seems like a life time. His mom had a small heart attack when she had seen me standing in the hall way. I was greeted with a big hug, then I headed towards his room.
I noticed the closer I got, the more nervous I became. What if he’s different, what if he doesn’t like me, what if he doesn’t want to be friends anymore. I felt myself burning, I couldn’t see, but I could tell I was bright red. It happens very easily because of my pale skin, which is often compared to as porcelain. I sighed hard and realized how ridiculous I was being. We have been friends since kindergarten and two months won’t change anything.
I walked into his room and I saw how different he looked, how big he had gotten at camp. I mean he was never scrawny before, and he was always the bigger of us two, even back as kids, but now it looked like he copied and pasted more abs and muscles onto himself. This made me feel slightly insecure. He did get a tan which made his eyes a deeper blue then before, and his usual dark brown ,free flowing ,long hair was now cut short. It was like one of those k-pop e-boy styles, and it weirdly fit him perfectly.
We gave each other a big hug and ended up talking for hours while playing video games. It was dark when he turned off the game and started pacing back and forth in his room. He kept picking stuff up and putting them into the same stop “yo, what’s with you, you're acting weird.” He started playing with his hair the way he does when he was about to tell a lie.
“What!” He chuckled “ nothings, wrong, what makes you think something’s wrong, actually everything’s great it’s ju-“
I can tell that he wanted to say something, but he was never good at using his word.“Tyler! Jeez bro just get it out” he started fiddling with his watch, the way he does when he gets really nervous. “ Just tell me, how bad can it be.” He looked me in my eyes and sat down next to me. I was getting kind of nervous, becuase I’ve never seen him like this.
He let out a heavy sigh and played with his watch some more. Without ever taking his eye of the watch he said “I’m gay.”