It was silent, the awkwardness hung in the air. But the tension was thick, so thick that if he wanted he could take the blade in his hand and cut through it I imagine. I eye the blade, the same blade he had only just snatched out my hand’s years ago. I look to my feet, submerged in water. My boots were surely ruined, my blue jeans, my navy shirt all soaked. My hair wet and dripping down my face. My make-up smeared, I must look like the tragic heroine in every teenage drama movie thought of. Marcus shifted next to me and my eyes floated up to him once again. I began to take him in one last time, His hair brown curly and messy, his eyes an emerald green, his freckles were perfectly placed. I imagine if there was a god, he made this one with extra love. He was dirty and smelled like musk, he must have run here to find me. His muscles bulged from his arm and chest, his breathing was beginning to slow. It felt like time had started to slow as I watched him. Then I came back to reality and he was staring at me, eyes clouded over in anger? Sadness? I couldn’t tell.
“How did we get here Nessa?” he asked. He was staring up at ceiling now, his curly hair hung over his eyes. I looked at my body again soaking in a tub of water and I smiled to myself. “I’ve always been here Marcus”. He shifted his gaze back to me, tears forming in the corners. “If you do this, I’m going to as well” he said, defiance in his eyes. He wanted me to challenge him. I scoffed and waved him off. “Now you’re being stupid”. “and you’re not!” he yelled, making me jump and shutter. His voice bounced off the bathroom walls, echoing around me. “Why would you follow me Marcus?”. “What’s a life without you?” he said, he sounded broken. “Then it’s confirmed, you are stupid. My reasons aren’t like yours. But it doesn’t matter I’ve made my peace”. I slowly begin to stand now, the water weighing me down, pulling me back. My boots slosh and squeak as they hit the tile floor. And he grabs my hand. “At least tell me why? I deserve that much”. “deserve? How so?” I ask, irritation peeking. “Because you made me love you, I at least should know why I must lose you” Something in me shook, something in me was stirred. And for some reason he looked different than I viewed him before. And things began to click into place. He had stood up now, grabbing my shoulders and spinning me around to face him. His green eyes glistening from tears. “If you won’t live for yourself then live for me Vanessa, live for me please…”