Opening my eyes with difficulty, I tried to get my bearing. Sleep had not quite let go of me, so I was still a bit foggy in comprehending my surroundings.
Looking at the clock by the bedside, I realized it was a few minutes after ten in the morning, judging from the brightness of the day. What day was it now? It had to be Saturday. I wouldn’t have slept in otherwise; my alarm would have gone off, I always set it for six a.m. every weekday, so I could prepare to get to work early.
Was I supposed to be doing anything today? I asked myself, as I tried to organize in my head. I had the feeling l was missing something, something I had to do, or somewhere I had to be? what could I be?
Airport! I had to go be at the airport in another fifty minutes, else I wouldn’t be there in time for Jack’s plane when it lands.
I quickly hurried to the bathroom to have the world’s fastest bath and was ready in ten minutes. So much for looking good for…
The phone rings, and cutoffs the conversation I was having with myself. I was still trying to squeeze into my other shoe as I hopped to get my phone by the bed.
I gave the auto-response for calls, breathless from my many activities, and trying to meet up with time.
“Hello, could I speak to Mrs. Williams please”
“This is her, who is this, and how may I help you?”
Please don’t count me as a rude caller, I urged as I moved around, stuffing things in my go-bag, and heading for the door.
“I am calling on behalf of Jumbo Airlines, could you please come to our office right away? I’m afraid there’s been an accident…”
That was all I remember about the phone conversation from that dreadful day. I still cannot tell if it was male or female that I spoke with as the phone clattered to the floor, but that day marked the beginning of the end of nearly two years of blissful marriage to Jack, and the beginning of a life without him.
It was just an official assignment, for God’s sake. An official assignment that took my husband away for five days, that now become a life without him…
It’s been two weeks since Jack’s death, and it has been the worst days of my life. I sometimes feel like this is a bad dream and pray to wake up from it. Only for one sympathizer or the other to knock me back to reality with their commiserating.
I feel lifeless and empty. Like someone used a giant spoon to scoop out all the contents of my heart.
I feel nothing.
This must be a bad dream, please someone, help me wake up.