I waited 3 hours after school...no Oliver. I don’t know where he went or if he went the back way home, which I don’t think he would do as it would take him longer to get home but I never seen him leave.
I decide to take pictures of my bruises with my phone camera, print them out without mum seeing and write down what happened yesterday.
It’s oddly amazing how you can see the pattern of Mr Kyles soles, disturbing but fascinating. You can clearly see the criss-cross pattern bruised and raised on my skin.
I can’t believe I was so fucking stupid. How did I not notice the notebook wasn’t there when I picked up my scattered things in Science, I’m an idiot for knocking it over to begin with.
I feel so stupid.
The moment I got to class I was handed a after school detention slip.
Fuck it’s from Mr Kyle.
It actually has a valid reason though, it’s for leaving class yesterday without permission during a mock exam. I swear at myself for giving him a reason to keep me behind after school.
The whole day, no Oliver. Now I’m fucking worried. He wasn’t in Maths and I haven’t seen him with Becks and the boys.
I haven’t gone to Mr Kyles classroom at break or lunch, I was too busy looking everywhere for Oliver and besides, I didn’t want to go anyway. I know he’s going to do something after school so why should I go in my free time too?
Damn, I just know he’s gunna be more than pissed but I just want to know where Oliver is.
I told him it was Mr Kyle, he gave me the book back, he had read everything! I’m mortified, the things Mr Kyle had done...What does he think of me?
He said he was going to make it better, that he was going to help. If he went to the police they would be here by now. What did he do?
Shit, did he go to Mr Kyle? No, he wouldn’t be that stupid, would he?
No if he did, Mr Kyle would have found me already and dragged me back to his classroom, not wait and give me a detention at the end of the day. But then again, I was meant to go to him at break and lunch.
God, I DONT KNOW. I don’t know what to do.
I’m freaking helpless.
Getting dressed after P.E, I prolong my time in the changing room as long as possible after the bell, in the end I’m the last one there and Miss Becet had to ask me to leave.
I make my way to Mr Kyles and knock on the door.
I knock again.
I open the door slowly and peek in the classroom. He’s not here. Suddenly I’m pushed from behind into the room and hear the lock click.
Ahh, there he is(!) My mind said sarcastically. I can’t even be bothered to turn around.
“Where were you!” He practically shouts.
“Getting changed from P.E” I said duly. He spins me around.
Shit he is pissed.
“I meant at break and lunch” he clenched his teeth, I shrugged knowing that it was a bad idea but too late.
He growled before back-handing my cheek, the force of it knocking me over to the floor.
“You stupid bitch!” He climbed on top of me, sitting on my abdomen. He speaks again, this time in his calm voice.
“First you stupidly call the police, then when you were unwilling to except your punishment, you kick me, not once but twice in the balls. Then you have the audacity to run from me. And ignore me for the whole day” He looked me dead in the eyes “what the fuck were you thinking?!”
The things going through my mind;
-I didn’t kick him twice in the balls, I kneed him in the junk then, I kicked him.
-He didn’t mention Oliver so I think he’s safe.
-Not ignoring, avoiding. Or is that the same thing?..
-And also, is he fucking stupid? Why, oh I wonder why? Let me think, because of YOU, YOU CRAZY PERVERT!
Of course, I’m not going to say that because my body still hurts from the spanking and kicks yesterday and I neither have a rape or death wish. The only thing I can think of is to try, focus on the word ‘try’, to get his empathy. Which, I don’t really think he has.
“I was scared” I whisper letting go of my real tears that I held in. He looked at me with a blank face, anger boils in me “Fine! You terrify me! I look at you and feel sick! I hate you!”
So...the whole empathy things gone then? I can’t help it. He just angers and upsets me.
He. Fucking. Laughs.
He slapped me before speaking “But do you know what pisses me off the most? The fact that you told someone about us!” He slapped my cheek again.
I felt a warm liquid run down my cheek, i smell nothing but iron. I wipe my nose with my shaky hand. Blood.
I can’t even focus on his words as I look at the crimson liquid that’s coated on the tips of my fingers. I soon snap back to reality feeling him move on top of me.
“You’re going to be punished and you’re going to be a good little girl like you were in your bedroom on Monday. If ” his jaw clenched “if you decide to misbehave. I will fuck you right now, on the cold, hard floor and I will make sure you don’t get any pleasure from it, do you understand?”
My whole body shook, he’s never spoken to me like that. He actually threatened to rape me.
He dragged my arms to my sides before leaning down, for a second I thought he was going to kiss me but instead he just watches me as his hands slide up my body.
Then, slowly they move beneath my shirt grazing my skin. I squirm under him as he lets out a groan. “Stop moving like that before I lose control” he grumbles forcing me to stiffen and stop moving.
His hands keep moving occasionally putting pressure on my bruises until they are directly under my boobs, they then remove themselves and he slowly starts unbuttoning my shirt. His eyes still fixed on my face watching me panic and enjoying my fear.
“Please, please don’t do this.”
“There’s the fear. The real fear. Baby, you brought me to this. This is your fault, now take your punishment before I make it worse for you” he smirks.
My hands come up to his chest as I try to push him off. He finishes unbuttoning my shirt and his eyes fix on my breasts. His eyes turn black with lust as he licks his lips. I go to cover myself but he catches my wrists and slams them back down to my sides making me wince.
“Fuck” he exhales “you have no idea what I want to do to you right now” his hand skims my left boob “how much I want you right now” his eyes squint as his hand goes down to a bruise on my stomach, his face softens “did I do that?”
“Who else would it have been?” I snap glaring at him.
“You bruise too easily.” You motherfu- you kicked me full damn force! “So fragile like a little doll” I cringe and he chuckles “you like that? Doll? My sweet little doll.”
“I am not yours.”
His grip immediately tightens.
“I want to make you mine so bad. Mark you in every way.”
“You already have.”
“Oh no, no, no, not like that. See, they go away, bruises heal. No, I want to mark you permanently. Mentally, physically. You’ll be mine. Mind, body and soul.”
His face dove down as he starts kissing my stomach. I whine and wriggle from the tickly unpleasant feeling that ties my stomach up in knots and makes me feel sick. Not to mention the soreness from the bruises as he presses down.
“No! Don’t do this” I beg, only just being able to hold back the tears.
“You love it. You love me. I’ve seen how you react from my every touch. Your body’s so responsive, even you can’t hide it from me. You want me really, whether you know it or not” He smirks against my stomach as my hands don’t move from his shoulders trying to push him away.
“Watch” he whispers teasingly.
His hand comes up my body from my waist and he lightly strokes it over my right breast. He smirks as my nipple instantly grows hard, clearly sticking out from my bra. My cheeks go red as I push his hand away and cover myself.
“Don’t hide yourself from me!” He growls capturing my wrists. He squeezes them hard as I gasp in pain. I feel the cuts on my wrist open as the scabs split and tear apart. “Don’t be so dramatic” he spits out angrily before slamming them down again.
He’s gunna break my wrist if he does that again.
Fear strikes me as I notice his waistcoat and shirt is gone too, when the hell did he do that?! He’s undoing his belt. Shit, fuck, what do I do? He rips it off before undoing the button on my trousers.
“NO!” I scream sitting up. I made him jump with the sudden outburst.
He however, continues to undo them taking down the zip and pulling them down just enough to see my pants.
I slap him as hard as I can.
He stills for a second, seemingly frozen before he shifts on me higher up, capturing my shoulders and pushes me back down to the floor.
He pushes me down with so much anger, so much force that when I hit my head on the floor my vision goes blurry as pain erupts in my head. I whimper and groan at the pain. My wrists are soon slammed down too.
“I told you. I told you what would happen if you made this difficult!” I try to focus my eyes on him as panic spreads through me.
I remember his threat now.
“No, no, no, please” I sob.
“Stupid little girl. I didn’t want it to be like this. I really didn’t. But you give me no damn choice! Must you be so stubborn, must you be so fucking difficult.”
“Help! HELP ME!” I scream ”hel-” I’m cut off by his hand.
With one hand over my mouth and the other holding my wrists together, he leans down and kisses my neck as I sob. He trails kisses down from my neck, through the valley of my breasts and to my lower abdomen.
He lets go of my arms but keeps a strong hold on my mouth muffling every sound I make. His grip hurts as his fingernails dig into the flesh of my cheek.
“God, you’re so fucking sexy” he moans as he comes up to face me.
My hands are clawing at his and once I see his face, I can’t help but scratch at that too.
“Ow! You little-damnit Casey!” He recoils from me and sits up clutching his face.
I wrap my arms around my head, wanting to just curl up into a little ball and disappear from the world.
I don’t want to see his face. I don’t want him to hit me again.
I don’t want to see what he’s going to do.
I just sob and sob into my own embrace.
I know there’s no getting away this time, my body just seems to give up as all I want to do is comfort myself and cover my face with my arms.
The silence drags on for what seems like forever, in between sobs I hear his deep breathing slow down. I dare not peek from my arms so I keep still.
What’s he doing? Why isn’t he moving? What’s he planning?