The 5 Stages of Grief

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Chapter 7, Rachel

It was perfect, just like she’d imagined it would be when she met him at Dr. Reichmann’s office earlier. Peter had never been that good, and Josh, well, yeah Josh had been good but he was long gone, not likely to come back. No, she had to focus on the present and the present was Grant.

She hadn’t admitted to Dr. Reichmann that Peter was gone. How could she? She hadn’t admitted it to herself, not really. But none of that mattered, Grant was here and he was wonderful. He would take care of her, help her get Evy back.

“That was great. It’s Rachel, right?” he rolled on his side and smiled at her, gave her nipple a little tweak, nothing too hard, just playful. She smiled back.

“Why don’t I see,” she began wriggling her way down the bed, trying to look seductive, sexy, “whether I can convince you to do it again?” She winked, took him into her warm mouth.

He moaned though pulled himself away. “As much as I would like to stay sweetie – and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t tempted.” He gave her ass a squeeze while getting up, walking to his clothes, “I must get on my way. People to see, things to take care of – you know. I’m a busy man, I’ve got things on the go.” He jumped out of bed and began dressing.

She lay there, fully exposed for him, doing her best to act cool, nonchalant, yet still entice him to stay. “When will you be back? I could make us some dinner – if you bring the wine?” She licked her lips. “Then after dinner, you could have me for dessert.”

He finished tucking in his shirt then sat down to pull on his boots – they were cowboys, though she doubted whether he’d ever touched foot on a farm.

“As I said, I’m sorry love but I’m busy.” He looked up at her, flashed a Cheshire smile.

“Me too, I must have forgot. Sue and the girls wanted to get together for drinks. I can’t believe it slipped my mind.” She bounced out of bed and slipped her robe on. Not the terry one she used around the house, the one that kept her warm, but the black see-through one that showed off her curves and breasts, a reminder of what he was missing. “What about tomorrow? If you come early enough, I could make us breakfast. We could start the day off right, if you know what I mean.” She sided up next to where he was standing, rubbing her might as well be nude body against his.

“Not now damn it – I said I have to go!” He pushed her hands away, moved her to the side so he could get around and started towards the front door, slinging back, “I’ll call you.”

“Call me! Call me! I know what that means you bastard! You won’t fucking call me. You’ve had your fun, had your pussy, you won’t call me. Fuck you – you bastard! Fuck you…” she sank to the floor, her face contorted, burst in tears, “you won’t call me…. If you do,” she sniffled, “I’ll be dead.” She looked up at him now, her face puffy from the tears, her robe disheveled, leaving her exposed but looking all the more pathetic for it, more desperate than sexy. “If you walk out that door, I will take my life – tonight. I will take every pill in the house, drink every ounce of alcohol and never wake up and you will know it was on your head. So go – leave me just like everyone else has in my fucking pathetic life. Like every piece-a-shit man who took what he wanted, told me he cared and never came back, never called.” She lowered her head, crying quietly now. “Even my little Evy is gone. I will never see her again….”

“Hey, we just met, girl – that is some crazy stuff, I mean really, really, fucked up.” He was walking back towards her from the front door. He’d almost been gone but had turned back. What does it mean? Another chance, that’s what it means.

She felt his hand against her cheek, wiping her tears. “There’s no need to get so worked up about it.”

“But you were going to leave and you wouldn’t have come back – I know.” She looked up, caught his eyes flashing her best, most helpless look. Her vulnerable, sexy little girl in a big girl body look – she put her hand to his chest again, this time he didn’t pull away. She smiled, just a little. “If you stay now, I will do anything for you…” She looked down, waited.

His voice was even, controlled. “When you say anything, does that mean – anything?”

She nodded.

He lifted her chin with his hand and looked into her eyes, grinning. “Whenever I say?” He winked.

Again, she nodded her agreement, a tear crept from her eye. She had him.

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