Tion

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18+ Have fun reading! If you don't like it, go somewhere else! I would really like ideas and comments! Constructive Criticism too please!

Erotica / Romance by Tion • Ongoing • 2 chapters

A Night with a Vampire by ROANNA HINKS
Overall Rating
Plot
Writing Style
Grammar & Punctuation

A Night with a Vampire

I think certain words were used to much, e.g, He "slammed" his lips on mine. There could have been more then fucking and eating out. I know she got tied some, but I think you could have done much better in adding more BDSM related stuff. All the sex and other stuff was very predictable. Phrasing really wasn't that great. Grammar wasn't good. Not a bad plot though. :).

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