Watercatcher7984

Town Set Aglow Review

This story had a great idea driving it, but it just doesn’t read like a completed story, it seems more like a rough draft. I did notice a couple of specific things that I thought could’ve been handled differently. “The trees of jealousy, heartbreak, grief, and hopelessness grew and grew and soon that was the only kind of oxygen they breathed." I think ‘air’ might've been a better word to use in place of oxygen, it just makes more sense. Oxygen is just oxygen, air can contain much more, in my opinion. There are a couple of places where I had to reread a sentence or a paragraph because I just couldn’t understand what the author was trying to say. I think a couple of read throughs would’ve been beneficial in catching these little hiccups and tidying them up. Now, I will admit, I don’t know anything about the history of the story, but the whole thing seems very rushed and choppy. The concept is amazing and I’d love to learn more about it, but there just isn’t much information there. On the bright side of things, it seems that with a little extra attention and time, this could be something truly remarkable.