Ysaline

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Her Dying Fate

I am speechless. Everything about your writing is perfect. From grammar, to writing style. Your descriptions are out of this world, I must say the way you wrote someone dying is a work of art. I can’t remember when I read a story this amazing!

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Normani Brooks

Okay, I don’t want to come off as harsh or anything, but I do hope this can help you. The way you wrote your book description is not in the least eye catching. Personally, if I had read it with no knowledge prior to you I would not have read the story at all. I think you should change it up a bit to hook the reader in and get them to sink deeper into the world you created. Again, I’m not trying to be harsh or offend you. I just think I should be realistic as possible with this view. Another thing I took notice of is you introduced your character by telling instead of showing. Show us your character. Describe who she is and what she looks like by showing, don’t have her us. Please don’t be mad, I’m just giving my opinion on what I think you should improve. Other than that Normani seems pretty relatable and it’s nice to see a character more focused on her schooling then partying, having sex, or well men in general.

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Butterfly Girls



First let me say it’s amazing you are focusing on mental illness in your characters. It’s refreshing because many authors usually write their characters off as perfect forgetting that characters are suppose to be similar to real life people. I know this is a horror novel and I have only gotten two chapters in, but the descriptions give the reader great imagery and not only that your writing style is perfect and sucks the reader in. Very good job on your story so far, can’t wait to see how it goes from here.

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The Witch Of Willow Lake

I must say. You are the first story on this app that I have truly liked the chapter and left a comment. Mainly because witches are one of my favorite things to read about. I do like how you introduced your character and I truly hope her parents will make it to her like they promised, but I have a feeling they won’t. I am excited to say I will definitely read onwards. :)

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The Heart of the Ocean



I want to say I only read the first chapter. I feel as if this chapter was putting everything into context for the future chapters, which means you have done a fantastic job. I like seeing the mother explaining to her daughter that she will always have hardships and she will overcome them, that’s a important lesson to learn at a very young age. As for her going off to find more shells for her castle, very kid like because most young children are not aware of the danger that poses. So great job on adding these details, and the scene with her drowning, well I have a feeling the person who will save her will be her future guy or girl. All in all great story.

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Five Words

I must say this story deserves a lot of praise. I was drawn into this story after only the first few paragraphs. The writing, the grammar, the description is all nothing, but perfect. You did a amazing job. As for your main character. I do understand why her boyfriend Adrian reacted that way, but the mother is right he most definitely can’t change his mind when he did have the chance to stay with her. Overall, this story is definitely one I would recommend to others.

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Inkitt is the world’s first reader-powered publisher, providing a platform to discover hidden talents and turn them into globally successful authors. Write captivating stories, read enchanting novels, and we’ll publish the books our readers love most on our sister app, GALATEA and other formats.